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"There have been other vessels before us, right?" Vessel asked after a brief comfortable silence, once Sleep had finished his second small braid and had moved on to gather large sections of hair from the middle.
It would only be a few times a month that Sleep would appear to them in his human form, always making sure to warmly greet all of his vessels before taking his First aside for one of their deep conversations about what they'd all been working on most recently, the newest worshippers they’d all gathered. Oftentimes, their conversations would end in a way such as this, with both of them simply existing together in the same space, Sleep's hands carefully weaving intricate braids into Vessel's long, silver hair.
Fond amusement rippled through the bond, along with intrigue. "Oh yes," he began, and Vessel could hear the soft smile in his voice from where he sat in front of him, both of them staring out across the lake and watching the rapidly setting sun. "Countless others." Vessel felt him beginning to weave together the sections of hair he'd separated. "Worshippers, followers, acolytes as well, of course. But my vessels I would always choose myself after careful consideration, and thus was closer to them than any other humans on Earth."
“How did you choose them?” Vessel asked, having always wondered that as well. “The same way you came to us, in dreams?”
“I came to them in dreams, yes, but in a way, they would choose me as well.” Sleep explained, fingers working their way down the braid he was weaving down Vessel’s back. “Simply put, their souls would call to me. I’d never have to search long to find them.”
Vessel listened with intrigue as Sleep tied off the end of the large braid, before gathering much smaller sections of hair from the crown of his head and beginning to weave it together. “In the age of the gods, at the height of my power, I had worshippers and followers by the hundreds of thousands. Acolytes were more rare, yet I still often had more than a dozen at a time. They were much like your Choir is to me - followers that I share a stronger connection with than other humans, but not as strong as with my vessels, and not sharing the mental bond I do with you and your others.” He tied off the end of the small braid he’d just woven, picking up the end of it and twisting it into where the largest braid began. “As for my vessels…throughout history there has been one constant, and that is the number - I would always choose the same four.”
Vessel blinked in surprise, the question of “ why four specifically? ” on the tip of his tongue, but he was certain it was for the same reason Sleep chose those specific humans in the first place. Their souls called to him. “Where did they come from?” Vessel asked instead. “Was there ever anything…specific about them? Like…were they royalty, were they regular humans, did they make certain offerings…?”
"They would come from all walks of life." Sleep explained, having woven the first small braid at the crown of Vessel's head into the main one that laid down the center of his back, now starting on an identical one on the opposite side. "They could be men, they could be women, they could be any combination or neither. Yet one similarity they always shared." Warmth and affection rippled through the bond again, but there was something underneath, something that felt almost remorseful. "Their devotion not only to me, but to each other."
Vessel blinked in stunned surprise. "Really?" he asked, wanting to turn to face Sleep, especially with the way the waves of guilt were becoming more intense. "They'd always end up together like we did?"
Sleep nodded, pausing in his weaving of Vessel's hair as he sighed. "I have never been too proud to claim that I do not have my flaws." he began, his voice low and wistful. "It took thousands of millennia for me to accept the love my vessels held for one another. For so long I was incredibly greedy and possessive, even cruel, believing that my vessels should be dedicated to me and me alone. Yet no matter how hard I tried to keep them separate, they would always find their way back together. Myself and all the gods could not have pulled them apart. Only when I realized that in loving each other, they loved me as well, did I allow them to express their affections. I can only hope in doing so that they would forgive me."
There was so much remorse in Sleep's voice that Vessel just had to turn around, and the melancholic look on Sleep's face, the way his eyes gazed distantly off at nothing in particular, pulled a shaky gasp from Vessel's lips, tears springing to his eyes. "Oh, love, I know they would." he murmured, taking his hands into his own. "You're nowhere near who you say you used to be."
Sleep turned to meet his gaze with a wistful smile. "If you could see what I was then, you would not recognize me."
"That's the part that matters." Vessel told him, smiling softly. "That you aren't the same as you once were." He laced their fingers together, squeezing Sleep's hands, wanting to erase the guilt from his face, the freezing ripples of remorse he could feel pulsing through the bond. He gazed deeply into Sleep's six eyes, projecting all of his love and affection in his own. "For what it's worth, I forgive you."
And that was one of the rare times that Sleep seemed to be stunned into silence for just a moment, before his entire expression lit up with so much intense, raw emotion that it made Vessel's chest ache. "Thank you, Vessel." Sleep's voice was thick, filled with such sheer warmth that Vessel could feel it crashing over him in waves. "You don't know just what and how much that means to me."
All Vessel could do was give Sleep a tender, shaky smile of his own, letting his teary eyes fall shut as he leaned forward to touch their foreheads together, their multitude of emotions flowing and twisting together at the contact. They stayed like that for a few moments, simply basking in the warmth and affection surrounding them, before Vessel sat back again, leaning into Sleep’s hand still on his face. “Tell me about them?” He turned back around so that Sleep could resume braiding his hair, picking up the second one he’d paused. “Who were the first? Who was, well, the First? ”
Sleep chuckled softly. “Ah yes,” he began, weaving the small sections of Vessel’s hair together as he spoke. “Much like my own, his name, or the one I gave him, has no direct translation in modern human language. For now, we may call him One. A young man just like yourself, finding himself in search of guidance, in search of a purpose…and afflicted by severe insomnia. Much like other humans of his time, he prayed, he worshipped, he made offerings to all the gods, but eventually, he called for me specifically. At that point, he had not had a full night’s sleep in months, and he brought me various offerings in hopes for just one night of rest. As I was lesser known than my fellow gods, I was quite intrigued by the unexpected attention, and I decided to offer him an arrangement. As in my true form, I could only communicate with humans through dreams, I gave him the same conditions that I gave you: he was to become my mouthpiece, my eyes and ears to humanity, my vessel, and give me his worship. In exchange, I would give him his most profound desire - which was, quite simply, solidarity among other individuals like himself.” Sleep’s lips curled into a slight smirk. “Needless to say, he agreed, and thus, I brought him Two, Three, and Four - again, the closest translation to their names that exists in present human language.”
Vessel’s head was spinning from everything Sleep had told him, his mind whirling from the amazement of hearing about someone so similar to himself from so long ago. His mouth opened and closed several times before he managed to find his voice, all he could ask at that point being, “How long were they your vessels?”
That same hint of remorse crept back into Sleep’s voice when he said, “Forty-three years.”
Vessel felt his stomach drop, and he knew his dread and heartache projected through the bond by the way that Sleep immediately sent a wave of reassurance from his own side, one of his hands leaving Vessel’s hair to rest on his shoulder. “Oh, love, you have no reason to worry regarding that,” he murmured, and Vessel let out a slow, shaky breath, his throat feeling tight at just the idea of being with Sleep and his others for so little time. There was a smile in Sleep’s voice when he spoke next. “All of my following vessels were mine for much longer than that. In fact, I once had the same vessels for over six hundred years.”
Vessel’s mouth dropped open, and he wanted to turn around to face Sleep again, just to see the smile he knew his deity was giving him. He couldn’t help the excitement that stirred in his chest, his heartbeat speeding up slightly as his own face split into a wide smile. “Really?” he asked, his hope reignited.
“Oh, yes,” Sleep’s voice was filled with affectionate amusement as he wove the second braid into the top of the main one, beginning to gather more sections of hair from below the first small one. “They came much later than the very first, but seeing as I had come to allow them to express their affections for one another, we all became very close.”
There was a hint of something else that crept into Sleep’s voice and through the bond, and Vessel felt his face flush. “How close?”
If Sleep were human, he likely would’ve rolled his eyes. “If you’re asking if we were intimate with each other as we and your others are now, the answer is yes.” he told him, and Vessel let out a breathless laugh, slight embarrassment stirring in the pit of his stomach along with his own amusement. “This time, I found them in much the same way I found you, when the one who would become the First was nearly devoid of all his hope and will to live. He didn’t have to call for me - I felt his pain through his nightmares. I told him that in exchange for his worship, I could grant him peaceful rest, and he expressed his true desire for companionship and love - just like One and all of my vessels before him. From there, he became my First, called Unus, and his others came to be called Duo, Tres, and Quattour.”
Sleep felt Vessel’s intrigue at the names through the bond, and a smirk pulled at his lips. “If I told you the names of all of my vessels throughout history, it would take years.” he remarked, and Vessel let out a soft chuckle. The third braid was woven into the main one, and then Sleep began to gather small sections on the opposite side as well. “However…the ones that came after those four were Primus, Secundus, Tertius, and Quartus, and several hundred years later, four men and women became Protos, Deuteros, Tritos, and Tetartos.”
Vessel had no idea what fascinated him so much with hearing the names of the vessels before him and their stories. It reminded him of what an ancient and otherworldly being Sleep was, and how lucky he was that such a being even allowed him to be in his presence, much less gave him all the love and affection that he did, and had given him in the form of his three others.
Sleep briefly recounted the stories of the vessels he’d named, before mentioning a specific year, one still hundreds of years before the present. “My most recent vessels,” he continued. “The ones I had before you and your others, my First was simply called ‘First’ this time, and unlike most of my other vessels, she was quite hesitant about the idea of being my vessel at first. In fact, the deeper mental bond we eventually shared wasn’t formed until after I had created it with her others: Second, Third, and Fourth.” Sleep let out a soft chuckle. “Yes, she was quite a dynamic individual…” The same feeling from earlier stirred in the bond again, the one that made Vessel’s face heat up. “Yet even as much as she would put up walls, I could still feel her desire for purpose, for love, deep in her soul. That was how I knew she truly was right to be my First - even if it took her months to believe it.”
Sleep paused just after he tied off the end of the fourth braid, a dull sort of melancholic feeling suddenly beginning to ripple through the bond. “As time passed, humans eventually moved on from relying on and worshipping the gods, and in time, many of us faded from existence.” Vessel felt his chest twist, his eyebrows drawing together. “My vessels stayed with me, but as the years passed, my power weakened and diminished with the lack of worshippers. They tried to spread the word of my existence, tried to find new followers to help me regain my strength, but in the end, I lost the ability to keep them alive. Without them, I was, in a sense, nothing.”
And Vessel just had to turn around again, his eyes welling up with tears as he took in the sorrowful look on Sleep’s face, the despair rippling through the bond. “My love…” His voice trembled slightly as he reached out to take Sleep’s hands, and his deity turned to gaze down at him with a mournful, yet hopeful smile.
“Don’t worry, my dear,” he reassured him, reaching out to tenderly cradle his face with one hand, stroking a thumb across his cheekbone. “This was the point in time that, to save myself from fading completely from existence, I went into a state similar to hibernation beneath the waters of this lake.” They both turned to gaze out at where the sun sat low in the sky, casting dark red and orange rays across the calm waters of the lake they sat before. Sleep’s fingers returned to Vessel’s hair, finishing weaving the last strands of the fourth braid into the largest one. “I remained in my dormancy for several hundred years, but eventually, you and I found each other again, and you helped me regain my strength. From there we carried on and found your others, along with more new worshippers than I would’ve ever thought possible in this time period. For that I am eternally grateful.”
Vessel smiled warmly, though there was the slightest hint of confusion beginning to stir in the back of his mind. What had Sleep meant by “found each other again”?
He didn’t get the chance to dwell on it, however, as Sleep removed his hands from Vessel’s hair to lay them lightly on his shoulders instead. “I’ve finished your braids.” he told him, and Vessel leaned into his touch. “Would you like to see them?”
Vessel nodded, smiling. “Yes, please.”
"Close your eyes." Sleep murmured, and Vessel did, breathing out slowly as he felt the familiar warmth of Sleep's power surging through their bond, the gentle fingers brushing against his temples, the momentary tingling behind his eyelids. It only took a few seconds, and then Sleep's hands were back to resting on his shoulders. "Look now."
From the outside, when Vessel opened his eyes, they were devoid of pupils and irises, no longer their usual black pools of ink, but a deep, swirling blue, like the ocean during a storm, glowing faintly with a soft light of the same deep blue. But Vessel couldn't see it - instead, he saw the back of his own head through Sleep's perspective, the braids that had been expertly woven.
Most of his silver hair still cascaded down his back, with one large, thick braid down the middle and two small, thin ones bracketing it. Four small, intricate braids came down from the crown of his head to weave into the top of the main one, and as he continued to gaze at his own hair in fascination, he realized that the braids had been woven with four sections of hair instead of the traditional three. In each braid, there were four distinct sections that twined together, all of them connected in some way, so masterfully crafted that it took Vessel's breath away.
" Oh ." he whispered, instinctively turning his head to see all of his hair, forgetting for a moment that the gorgeous display in front of him was himself. His gaze didn't shift as he watched his head move, watched his own hands come up and carefully touch the intricate braids, his mind swimming with how surreal watching himself from outside his own body still was. "Oh, Sleep..." He could feel Sleep's smile through their bond, the way that his deity's affection and love swelled in his chest so greatly that if his eyes were his own then, they would’ve already been welling up with tears. "They're beautiful. They're absolutely gorgeous."
Vessel blinked, and suddenly he was back in his own body, his eyelids fluttering and his head spinning from the slight dizziness that came over him like a wave, swaying a little bit where he was sitting. Once he'd refocused his gaze, he turned to meet Sleep's eyes, his own now tearing up at the soft smile that his deity was giving him, the warmth in all six of his heavy-lidded eyes. "Thank you."
Sleep leaned down so he could press their lips together, and Vessel smiled into the kiss, his entire body relaxing into Sleep’s hold as he wrapped his arms around his First’s shoulders. A few moments passed before a short spark of something deeper ran through the bond for just a second, and then Sleep suddenly but gently nipped Vessel’s bottom lip with his teeth, pulling a surprised gasp from the vocalist as he let out a soft chuckle and kissed soothingly over where he’d bitten.
As soon as they separated, Vessel remembered what Sleep had said just before he’d finished with his braids. “One last thing,” he put in. “What did you mean by ‘found each other again ’?”
"As I said," Sleep gave him a knowing smile, his eyes seeming to glint with something even in the rapidly fading light. "I always chose the same four vessels."
Vessel blinked, the words turning in his mind, before the realization suddenly dawned on him, his eyes widening and his jaw dropping in a shaky gasp as exactly what Sleep was telling him became clear. "The same...you mean...?"
Sleep's expression was filled with so much warmth that it made Vessel's breath hitch, tears welling up in his eyes as his deity tenderly took his face in both of his hands, thumbs stroking gently over his cheekbones. "My Vessel, my beloved," he murmured, and Vessel let out a trembling exhale, something between a gasp and a sob, as he leaned into Sleep's hands on his face. "You and I, you and your others, we have all loved countless times before."
This time, Vessel couldn't hold back the choked sob that escaped him, tears spilling down his cheeks that Sleep immediately brushed away with his thumbs, smiling down at him with so much love and affection that Vessel felt like his chest was bursting with it. Any words he wanted to say kept dying in his throat, the few that managed to fall from his lips broken by his gasping, absolutely euphoric cries. Sleep leaned down so he could tenderly press his lips to Vessel's forehead, before he carefully pulled his First forward so he could bury his face in his chest, slowly stroking one hand through his hair as he murmured soft, sweet endearments and affirmations against the side of his head where his lips came to rest.
It took a few minutes, but soon, Vessel’s sobs waned until they were shaky gasps that continued to escape him as he managed to choke out “Thank you, thank you…” between short, trembling breaths.
Sleep just smiled, pressed his lips to Vessel’s forehead again, and whispered “Thank you. ” against his skin.
The sun had set by the time they began their trek back home. Even though Vessel could see in the dark thanks to his own six eyes, Sleep still walked him back to the manor, recounting a few more stories about past vessels that had him smiling and projecting waves of his love through the bond. Love for his past and present vessels - although they were one and the same, Vessel remembered, the thought of that still making his chest swell with warmth until he felt like he would burst with it. The idea that he and Sleep, he and his others, had always been and would always truly be with each other forever…well, he couldn’t think about it too much, otherwise he’d burst into tears again.
When they returned to the manor, Sleep paused just outside the door so he could take Vessel’s hands into his own, smiling softly down at him. “It’s always good to see you, my love.” he murmured, pressing his lips to the backs of Vessel’s knuckles.
Even as long as they’d been together, Vessel still felt his face heat up as his lips curled into a smile. “And you as well.”
Sleep took a step forward so he could lean down to tilt Vessel’s chin up with a finger and brush their lips together for just a moment, and the First shut his eyes as they kissed slowly and tenderly, his entire body feeling the warmth of his deity’s love crashing over him in a wave. “Go to your others, now,” he instructed softly once they’d parted, and Vessel nodded, suddenly wanting nothing more than to be close to his three loves. “I’ll see you again soon, my Vessel.”
Vessel watched him dematerialize into a shadowy black mist, felt his presence settle in the back of his mind, before he turned back to the manor to push the door open and step inside.
He found his lovers on the couch together, wrapped around each other with III in the middle, shouting wildly and waving his controller around as IV laughed and II pressed the buttons of his own controller in a much calmer manner. III was leaning back against IV, his long legs stretched out in II’s lap, with one of IV’s arms around his chest from behind and II leaning forward on III’s legs on top of his own.
Vessel smiled as soon as he saw them and heard the sound of IV’s laughter and III’s enthusiastic yelling, wanting to stay in the shadows so he could watch them for a few more moments, but as usual, they seemed to always know when he was there. They all looked up at the same time, III smiling brightly and immediately jumping to his feet, but skidding to a stop before he could run to Vessel. IV only laughed harder as III muttered a series of curses under his breath, frantically pressing the buttons of his controller, while II easily found his own pause button and set his controller aside. III let out an exaggerated groan, finally finding the right button before he tossed his controller back on the couch and turned back to Vessel with a wide smile. “Hi, Ves.”
Vessel returned his smile, leaning close to kiss him softly. “Hello, love.” he murmured, touching their foreheads together and letting his eyes slip halfway closed at the affection rippling through the bond and shining in III’s eyes. He felt II come up beside him, slipping a hand into his own, before he heard IV’s quiet gasp from his other side.
“Oh, Vessel, they’re lovely,” he murmured, smiling in wonder and fascination as he reached out to gently touch the intricately crafted braids. Vessel turned so he could show them his braids in full, joy sparking through the bond as II and III took in the sight with amazement, reaching out to touch them as well. Vessel let out a soft laugh as he turned back to face them, and IV took his hands and smiled up at him. “You’re absolutely beautiful, love.”
“Sleep is a master of his craft.” III pointed out, his eyes crinkling at the corners from the wide grin splitting his face. Vessel turned to face him with a raised eyebrow.
“What, you don’t think I could’ve done any of this?” he asked, and III let out a soft laugh.
“Come on, Ves, I know you don’t know how!” he remarked, and Vessel made a big show of rolling his eyes and sighing in exaggerated exasperation.
“What makes you think I can’t learn? ”
“Because you’ve tried to before!”
“Now, now,” II chimed in, an amused grin on his face as he moved to wrap an arm around each of their waists. “We still love Vessel very much, even if he can’t braid hair.”
“The last time he tried to do mine, it looked like someone with no arms did it!” III put in, proceeding to laugh hysterically at his own words.
“I’m still standing right here! ” Vessel protested, pulling another laugh from III and IV as II sighed and shook his head, stretching up so he could press a kiss to Vessel’s cheek. IV did the same, before III, still giggling, managed a little “aww” under his breath before he, too, kissed right below Vessel’s first set of eyes, smiling against his skin.
And it was there, surrounded by his three loves like this, that Vessel’s emotions from before began to rise up again, tears springing to his eyes as he reveled in the warmth and affection rolling off all of them in waves. The same warmth and affection that they’d shared in their countless past lives together, always finding their way to each other even when everything was stacked against them.
No matter what, they had always been and always would be each others’.
They noticed the tears in his eyes right away, all stepping closer to reach out and touch him - III’s hand on his arm and II’s hands taking his. IV’s hands tenderly cradled his face as he gazed up into his eyes. “Ves, darling, what’s wrong? Are you okay?”
Vessel let out a breathless laugh, smiling brightly at his three loves and drawing them close. “Yes,” he murmured, feeling their worry dissolve as he projected all the intense love he felt through the bond. They wrapped their arms around him, and he shut his eyes as he felt his chest swell with so much warmth that it felt like he was bursting with it. “I love you all so much. Always.”
At the chorus of “we love you too”s that surrounded him, Vessel swore he could feel every ounce of the love from the hundreds of thousands of years their souls had been aligned.