Work Text:
He sat there cleaning his gun as he has so many times before, pure muscle memory at this point. Skilled hands holding the metal with a surprising amount of care, like touching a lover, like holding something worth a gentle touch.
A sun bean that slipped through the curtains graced his shape in a warm glow while he sat there in his black shirt and jeans and that familiar mask you’ve grown so used to seeing. He wore it as if it were his own face and at this point, it might as well be. He looked peaceful. The soft blues tunes of John Lee Hooker’s album “I Hated The Day I Was Born” played in a low volume from his phone beside him, creating an calm and pensive atmosphere.
At least that’s what you could see from your spot at the door frame where you’ve been observing him since you walked past the hallway and caught that glowing glimpse of him, you don’t know how long you’ve been standing there. But he knows, he noticed it from the start, attentive as he always has been. With his work, with his gun, with you. It’s true that beside his scary Lieutenant reputation, he does has a soft spot for you and everybody has noticed it.
You’ve always wondered why and frankly, if you’d ask he’d probably not have the answers you were looking for...maybe he also doesn’t understand it. Maybe he doesn’t want to.
“Just going to stand there the whole day?” His voice knocked you out of your thoughts, he was looking straight at you now.
“Sorry sir, I got lost in thought, I’ll let you finish what you’re doing” You said quickly in hopes of being able to escape from there as fast as you could, you knew you weren’t being exactly subtle but it was still embarrassing being caught staring.
“No. Come here for a moment” He commanded in a calm tone while gesturing for you to approach, he didn’t sound as angry as you expected so the chances of you having to do a tough workout as a punishment seem unlikely, so that’s a relief.
You didn’t hesitate to do as he said and made your way closer to him, initially planning on just standing beside him, which quickly changed once he pulled you to sit down in front of him once you were close enough. You were pulled closer to him until your back was completely against his chest and you could feel his warmth from sitting under that sunbeam for so long.
“Comfortable?” His low voice asked quietly near your ear, you were close enough that you could feel his chest rumbling against your back when he spoke. That accent that was such an important part of his characterization never sounded more right then when it was spoken so closely, so gently.
You couldn’t find the words as your breath was taken away from you so you simply nodded. He chuckled lowly and proceeded to keep cleaning his gun while providing you with a closer view on the front seat, that seat being the space in between his legs with his arms going around you to tend to his gun. You could feel his thighs touching the sides of your legs and feel every shift of his breath on his chest against your back, see the hair that framed your face gently move back and forth with each one of those breaths over your shoulder and also noticed other details.
Like the small scars that could be found on his fingers and tattooed arms that were visible by the short sleeved shirt he was wearing. You could notice the way his arms flexed and turned with each controlled movement and the way his fingers held on to the smaller pieces of the disassembled gun so carefully but also firmly to not lose it in a careless slip. You remained silently like that for a while, he seemed content enough and you couldn’t complain either.
“Do you put on a show like this for anyone else?” You decided to lighten the mood a little bit and see if he reciprocated, as much as you enjoyed the comfortable quiet moment with him, his voice was always a welcomed sound.
“I’m afraid I only perform to the best crowd” He replied in a low tone with a hint of mischief that did nothing but leave you even more flustered.
“Certainly the most mysterious performer I’ve come across” You chuckled a bit, but he was silent, he’s a quiet guy by nature but this silence felt...different. A risky idea crossing his mind, somehow his riskier and more impulsive moves always happened around you.
He leaned back slightly taking that warmth away with him and you heard a shuffling sound like fabric being moved, when you were about to ask what he was doing, you felt his presence back close again, but this time as his chest touched your back again it was completely different.
“Shh, don’t look back” He said next to your ear, that deep bass of his tone never sounding more clear than it did now as you felt a light stubble gently grazing the side of your face. He didn’t?….did he?
“Did you…” You started speaking and quickly stopped once you felt his arms moving next to your waist and saw them placing that familiar skull mask down on the table before his hands quickly went back to finish his handiwork.
“Yes, I did. If you look back I’ll have to make you do a few laps around the base” He replied with a strict tone but the chuckle he couldn’t hold back hinted to his amusement. That tease was messing with you and he may just be doing a good job at it. Your own Hades, promising Eurydice as long as you don't look back, you suddenly sympathize with Orpheus in his struggle.
As his bare face now rested against yours, you couldn’t help but imagine how he’d look. You knew he had dark brown eyes and that he most likely was blond but what else was there? You felt his stubble so you know he wasn’t clean faced at the moment, you felt the side of his face against yours but that didn’t give you much information of it’s shape, only how nice it felt against you. Could he have other scars? Maybe on his lip? Was his hair a buzz cut? Or was it just a short cut? If you were to run your fingers through it, would it be soft? Would he enjoy that? Your mind couldn’t stop thinking and questioning and each new question raced your heart a little more with it’s makeshift answers.
“You know I just don’t do this for everybody, right?” He asked, breaking you out of your thoughts for a moment.
“Yeah, I know,” His question just lead you to thinking even more about this odd position you found yourself in, it brought you back to your first questioning. It was obvious he didn’t do to everyone the stuff he does for you, so why...you? “Why me?”
You could feel his body stiffen behind you as he paused his actions briefly before getting back to it, he was almost done. He remained silent in thought, searching for the right words and yet coming out empty handed, the only answer he could provide was being honest.
“You’re the only one I can’t think clearly when I’m around”
He said it with no hesitancy, after all it was true, he was never a man of many words but around you, he wished he had read more books to have the right vocabulary to express himself. To express this feelings he got when he was around you, he knew exactly what it was, he just wished he knew how to address it out loud.
What he didn’t know was that his words were just enough to be the last push you needed, the confirmation you’ve been looking for to bridge that chasm.
“Yeah, I get it, same thing happens when i’m with you” You revealed your affections and held your breath in expectation of his answer, you've placed all your cards on the table and yet he still seemed to have all the aces as you only got a hum in reply, which you felt vibrating against your back.
Soon enough he finished cleaning his gun and reassembling it, he placed it aside carefully and rested his face on the crook of your neck while he breathed in the scent of your hair while his now, free arms found their way to hold around your waist. He was contemplating something important, something that could change everything.
He remained silently holding you like that for a while, he’d never admit it out loud, but he was hyping himself up to go through what he had thought about. Something that past him never would’ve considered to do not even at gunpoint, but he wasn’t his past self, not since he’s met you.
“Ghost?” You finally asked when the silence started getting to you, you in your cluelessness and anxiety-ridden thoughts couldn’t help but assume his silence as a rejection, even while his arms still stayed wrapped around you. The human brain can be so funny in it’s delusions sometimes, where lies can looked just as convincing without anything to factually back them up.
“Simon” He said quietly.
“What?”
“I said,” He started talking and this time, there was a new strength and certainty in his voice as he took a deep breath and proceeded to hold your chin in between his hands and turn your face to look at him, to actually look at him, not the mask, not Ghost. To look at Simon, the man with the sad eyes and with the strong brows and with the blond hair that glowed in that golden light of the sun like a halo, an angel of death. Just like his dark eyes that shifted into the color of honey whenever the sun caught it just right, you've wondered if his touch could taste as sweetly. The man with the few faded small scars on his skin and with the face that would wrinkle in seriousness as he observed your reaction at the sight of it all, finally unveiled. Every detail and every curve of his face, nose, lips would just add a certain charm to his features that took your breath away “Call me Simon from now on, copy that?”
You couldn’t help but smile.
“Yes sir”.