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We didn’t have enough time to create sweet memories together. Not that our line of work allowed that anyway. We’ve always been on the brink of death, which is funny because I was supposed to be gone by now. Instead, I’m in this darkness, this limbo, alone with my thoughts while my body lies unconscious.
I never thought I’d feel this powerless again. Like I failed to fulfill my promises. I knew my freedom would come at a cost, I just hoped the bill wouldn’t come so soon.
Still, I don’t regret a thing. I am grateful for the little moments I shared with everyone. But especially those I’ve spent with you. I wish we’d become closer so I could tell you the reason why I escaped the countryside. I wish we could go shopping together again, go to that particular cafe and drink bubble tea. It’s crazy how fast my heart decided to allow you in. Eh, truth be told? Nothing would make me happier than seeing your pretty face one more time.
***
Nobara spent several months in a state of coma after the Shibuya incident. Ieiri and Nitta did their best to assist the first-year student, but the brain damage was too severe. The doctor didn’t want to get people’s hopes up, mostly because the odds of survival were extremely low. The idea of a full recovery was completely off the table, and everyone knew the jujutsu world was merciless enough to make sorcerers not cling to miracles. This is why Megumi avoided visiting her. He came up with the excuse of being busy with curses in order to avoid the pain of seeing Nobara in such a miserable state. It hurt to see his classmate like that, not to mention the feeling of guilt and powerlessness. With Yuji missing and Gojo sealed, how could he face her if she found the strength to wake up? He wasn’t good with words in the first place.
The only person who kept a schedule of checking on Nobara was Maki. The second-year student now realizes that they never had the chance to team up. In fact, it always felt like Maki was the one who saved Nobara from trouble.
“And both times not from a curse, but my own twin,” Maki chuckles.
She remembers when Nobara said she respected her senpai, and her admiration would only grow during the Goodwill Event. Deep down, Maki ached for that courage. To be so honest about others and herself. She was not good with people, which was not surprising due to the environment she was raised in. But, somehow, she managed to become stronger and even made friends. She wouldn’t go easy on newcomers like Okkotsu and Itadori, but Nobara was not unfamiliar with curses. She had experience when she joined Jujutsu High. Besides, there was a fiery spark in her eyes, the same spark Maki carried ever since she decided to show her clan what she was capable of. If only they had more time…
Maki was so sure they’d get along, maybe even teach her a thing or two. She found in Nobara the little comfort and honesty she never had at home, only to lose it all.
“What a pain in the ass, right? I mean, this life. If not to prove my family wrong, I’d never walk this path. I guess I’m just really stubborn. But you? I heard that you chose to become a sorcerer. Why would anyone with a sane mind do that? Tsk, I should’ve asked. It sucks to live full of regrets, so you better wake up soon and tell me everything.”
Unfortunately, Maki was fated to walk a darker path. The Shibuya incident left physical and emotional scars on her, but nothing compares to the pain of being murdered by her own father. She survived, although not unscathed. Her heart was lost the moment Mai sacrificed her last breath to save her sister. Mai said it all. They were one. And now she was gone, leaving a hole in Maki’s chest and a weapon in her hand. With that, Maki annihilated her own clan, the source of the twins’ suffering. She became stronger and fulfilled her dream, although it also turned her into a cold-blooded murderer. A monster.
Would you still respect me after this slaughter? After the monster I’ve become? she would ask Nobara, if not for the shame. Maki never returned to the infirmary. The path she was forced to take was a lonely one.
Nobara would disagree, though. She wasn’t one for morals, especially under those extreme circumstances. Still, how could she know about the incident? She was still recovering. The only thing she felt from the outside world was Maki’s absence. Nobara didn’t know why her senpai had stopped coming. Was she still alive? Did she grow tired of seeing Nobara in that weak state? Other people would cry and mourn, but not her. It actually made her stronger, determined to see Maki again. Her body might have been weakened, but not her mind. If there was something they had in common, it was stubbornness.
Besides, Nobara was a brilliant student. She learned how to tap into her cursed energy, no matter how hard it was to navigate between reality and dream. It was all she could do while in coma. It took her months, but she managed to become stronger. To the point of finally learning reverse cursed technique.
One day, she finally accomplished what few were capable of. She healed her own wounds and opened her eyes. Ieiri comforted her and explained everything that has happened to the world. The culling games, Sukuna’s awakening and Gojo’s passing. It was too much, but she gave her best to come back. She wouldn’t falter now.
“Let the students deal with Sukuna. Okkotsu, Itadori and Maki have a plan. If they work together, there’s still hope we can stop the king of curses.”
“Maki-senpai is…? And Itadori-kun?”
“They’re all alive. And determined to retrieve Megumi’s soul and body. Have faith in your teammates, dear.”
Nobara felt a sting in her heart. Her friends were in the front line, risking their lives to save the world. And what was she doing? Sleeping through it all? Ieiri had several objections, but nothing could prevent Nobara from getting up. She ran across the halls of what was left of the school, trying to find Itadori. Trying to find someone. Anyone . It was fate indeed.
“M-Maki-senpai?” she found her in a room, waiting for her turn to leap into the fight. Maki was focused and calm, the stillness before the storm broke loose. Little did she know Nobara was the storm.
“You?” she hesitated. She lost so much. She lost her sister, her entire clan ready to execute her. She only knew survival now. Instinct. Feelings were a distant thought. And yet, seeing her again… She felt ashamed. Nobara only knew the old Zen’in Maki. Not this monster she’s become. Nobara was the last light in her darkness, so bright that made her step back in shame of her beauty.
“W-What happened to you, Maki-senpai? Your skin, your hair…”
“It doesn’t matter anymore. I’m not what you used to know. Stand back, I have a demon to kill,” she walked towards the door, ignoring Nobara entirely. Or at least trying to .
“W-wait! Senpai, wait,” she grabbed Maki’s hand gently.
Such a soft hand, capable of warming the coldest of hearts…
Their eyes met. Time stopped for a brief moment.
“I didn’t learn reverse cursed technique and healed myself only for you to ignore me. Heh, in fact… I’m crazy, you know? I really am. Funny how I’m not afraid anymore," Nobara smiled softly.
“Afraid? Of what?”
First, she let go of Maki’s hand. Then, she tucked the hair behind her ear. Her eyes were shining with confidence and tenderness. She was ready.
“Heh, you’re really oblivious, aren’t you? Maki-senpai, you’re the reason I woke up. I wanted to see you again. I wanted to tell you why I ran away from the countryside. I wanted to go shopping with you again and share many more memories at your side. Tokyo gives me the courage to be this crazy, you know? Crazy to the point of confessing that I… I really like you. And it’s fine if you reject me. At least, I’m finally free to confess that I like a girl. Finally free to be who I am. And I will always be thankful for that, no matter what you say next.”
Maki’s heart skipped a beat. It’s been so long. She never thought about it deeply. She wasn’t really interested in boys, now that she looked into her past. Still, what difference would that make? She was a monster. And Nobara deserved better.
“Hmph. I told you I’m not what you used to know. I killed my entire clan. Mai is dead because of them. And they paid for it. Every single one of those fuckers. I’ll have to keep killing whoever crosses my way and tries to bring me to justice. The person you like is in the past. We can never go back to those light-hearted times. That Maki is dead, along with Mai. I’m a demon now, a monster. The only thing keeping me from becoming a curse is my lack of cursed energy. Now, one last time, stand aside. I have to go.”
Words died in Nobara’s lungs.
That’s what I thought. Who could love someone like me? Who could love a monster?
Maki was ready to leave when she felt Nobara’s hand on hers once more.
“I’m sorry… I’m sorry I wasn’t there for you. If only I were there, I’d have helped you.”
“Help me? You wouldn’t…”
“I told you, didn’t I? I’m crazy. And I don’t care what comes next. If anyone hurts you, I’ll hurt them back. Unless you reject me, of course. I’ll respect whatever your decision is. I couldn’t protect you because I was weak, so I became just a little stronger. I see now that it wasn’t enough, you’re on a whole new level of strong, heh. Still, I’m not sleeping anymore. I’ll give my best and keep admiring you as I always did, Maki-senpai. Then, maybe one day, you’ll see me as I see you.”
Maki took some time to process Nobara’s words. There it was, her courage, her honesty. Suddenly, a smile appeared on her face.
“Heh. You’re a fool, y’know? I’ll have to agree, you are crazy. Japan is in shambles, the world will never be the same anymore. And you found the courage to confess anyway. To a monster, nonetheless. Maybe we’re both insane. But you know what? Fuck it. I’ll be as crazy as you are. So I gotta ask. When this is all over, when Sukuna is dead and this city rebuilt… Would you go on a date with me?”
They were both glad. Thankful even. Amidst chaos and tragedy, they found hope in each other.
“Yes! I can’t wait!” her smile felt like the sun.
Maki was ready to slash anyone and rebuild the world for her. Only for her.