Work Text:
1 - “you must be my guardian angel”
though hanbin was sure that mr. and mrs. kim offered to drive their second son to university for his first time on the campus as a student instead of as a sibling, gyuvin had instead elected to shove his three minimal boxes of belongings into the back of hanbin’s subaru so the four friends could make the four hour drive out together. the four being hanbin, jiwoong, matthew, and gyuvin, of course. as a first semester freshman, it was almost endearing how enthusiastic gyuvin was to join the rest of his friends at the college, and he’d spent most of the car ride thus far yapping matthew’s ear off for any stories about the second year’s experiences during his welcome week the year prior.
blissfully saved from recounting his own embarrassing first week memories, consisting of evenings getting far too drunk at the freshman mixers, or the administrative issues that prevented him and matthew from dorming together, which then forced hanbin into a randomly-assigned double in an ancient building at the seemingly furthest point from all his classes that could still technically be considered “on-campus.” matthew, on the other hand, had gotten the better end of the temporary friendship breakup, and met one of his now best friends in his random double.
hanbin’s roommate, who he’d gotten along with well enough for the first semester, rushed a rival frat and was forced to cease all communications with hanbin as part of his pledging duties. not that hanbin hadn’t also done stupid things as a pledge, though he’d like to think he’d draw the line before ending any friendships over a set of greek letters. his roommate had told him, or well, had a friend inform hanbin that it wasn’t personal. still, even after both freshmen had been initiated into their respective fraternities, their friendship had never recovered.
roommate issues aside, second semester had been much better than the first, because throughout all his hours spent pledging at zeta chi rho, he’d at least had matthew by his side. at first, hanbin hadn’t been so sure about the idea of rushing in the first place. he had grown confident enough in his sexuality that he didn’t want to hide it anymore, and he knew that it wasn’t likely that all the brothers would accept him the way his friends had. but in the end, it was jiwoong who promised him that zrho would be a good place for him, and as the pledge master at the time, if anything started to go sour, jiwoong promised to have the misbehaving member put on disciplinary status or removed. reassuring hanbin that those kind of attitudes had no place in their house, jiwoong convinced him, and hanbin officially applied to rush.
surprisingly, he ended up loving it. hanbin was even elected as the pledge class president by his fellow pledges, and found more and more that the zrho house was becoming a second home to him. when hanbin had confessed to matthew how scared he’d been that he would be pushed out by the other pledges when he’d inadvertently outed himself to them after one long night at the house, matthew had only laughed. everyone who knew hanbin loved him, matthew assured him, and if anything, not keeping the secret anymore had opened hanbin up. he wasn’t walking on egg shells anymore, but that didn’t mean that the other pledges didn’t tease him now they had newfound information on his preferred taste in partners.
the rest of the brothers were more of a mixed bag, but the hold-outs came around upon the realization that hanbin’s extensive network of friendships greatly expanded their party guest lists. now, jiwoong was their chapter president, and hanbin had been elected as the social chair, and he was looking forward to his first year living in the house with matthew.
on the other hand, hanbin was pretty sure gyuvin wouldn’t be interested in any of that though. unlike his older brother and cousin, gyuvin hadn’t expressed any interest in rushing at all. in fact, he tended to change the topic whenever another family friend or relative asked him about planned to join the organization as well. with three connections in the house, gyuvin would be a shoe-in, nepotism governing a lot of the executive politics in greek life. even when jiwoong assured him that he wouldn’t have to drink if he didn’t want to, gyuvin still rejected the offer. though hanbin was a bit disappointed that gyuvin wouldn’t try to join them in the second semester, hanbin didn’t fault him for it. fraternities weren’t for everyone, and gyuvin would surely find other ways to belong on their campus that didn’t involve day-longs and nights of binge drinking.
“what dorm are you in again?” matthew asks, and hanbin keys himself back into the conversation.
“wolf hall,” gyuvin says, “heard anything about it?”
“in pollock? it’s not bad,” matthew shrugs, “heard anything else hanbin?”
“it’s in a good location, but i heard the rooms are unrenovated,” hanbin recalls, trying to remember if he had any friends who lived there last year.
“did you go for a random roommate?” matthew asks, and gyuvin nods. hanbin wouldn’t have recommended that, but he understands if gyuvin wanted to escape the people from their high school and their small town.
“best of luck. just hope for a roommate like mine, and not like hanbin’s,” matthew encourages, “and if you end up on the outs with them, just crash at jiwoong hyung’s place.”
jiwoong doesn’t even stir from his impromptu nap in the front seat at the mention of his name. hanbin envies him, but knows the senior is quite stressed with his final year work on top of his presidential duties.
executive privileges mean that hanbin gets one of the coveted parking spaces across from the zrho house guaranteed, but gyuvin gripes about having to carry his boxes the fifteen minute walk back to his dorm, so he works out a deal with jiwoong to drop his car at the house while he helps gyuvin move in. why gyuvin’s actual brother has decided to leave the task of helping his younger sibling settle in to his cousin, hanbin will have to determine later. for now, there’s more important things to discuss.
“leave me the bed on the right side?” hanbin bargains with matthew.
“whatever you say man,” matthew shrugs, “but if they’re bunks, i’m taking the bottom one.”
“i’m older than you,” hanbin argues.
“first come, first serve,” matthew counters.
a car honks at them as they hold up the drop-off line in front of wolf hall.
“hanbin, come on,” gyuvin complains, “i can’t carry all of it by myself.”
sighing, hanbin steps out of the driver’s seat so jiwoong can swap with him. he waves in apology to the car behind them, hefting gyuvin’s last box into his arms.
“what’s in this?” hanbin nearly drops it from the unexpected weight, “rocks?”
“books?” gyuvin offers, uncertainly.
hanbin peeks inside, “you did not pack your entire gaming set-up. that’s one of your three boxes? what’s in the rest?”
gyuvin awkwardly shrugs, “clothes are in one.”
“in the other?”
“snacks.”
hanbin groans, “i don’t know what else i should have expected. come on,” he directs them into the building, “what floor are you on?”
of course the elevator doesn’t work today of all days, leaving the pair to carry the boxes up four flights to gyuvin’s dorm room.
“do you think they’ll have the elevator fixed soon?” gyuvin asks, out of breath by the fourth floor landing. it’s not that hanbin had skipped the gym over the summer, but even he hopes he never has to go through that again. they’re early enough where most of the doors in the hallway are still closed, which means most of the other freshmen must be scheduled to come in later.
hanbin doesn’t want to get gyuvin’s hopes up when the truth is administration at this school is quite useless and probably won’t have maintenance come look at the elevator for weeks, but he also doesn't want to poison gyuvin’s view of the school before he’s even started.
“hopefully, otherwise it’s going to be quite the workout every day.”
gyuvin flops onto one of the beds, face up toward the ceiling, his roommate hasn’t arrived yet so the whole room is bare. it has a bit of a creepy vibe, which is a nice way to say it looks a bit like a prison, if prisons were made of cinder block and had creaky wooden desk chairs.
“welcome home, i guess,” gyuvin sighs, “it’s not going to be that bad, right?”
“you’re going to love it here, i’m sure,” hanbin promises, “you’ll meet some really awesome people, and some not so great ones too, but you’ll remember the good ones more.”
“i think i just wanted to grow up and come out here with you guys so much, i didn’t realize what being an adult was actually going to mean,” gyuvin confesses.
hanbin comes to sit beside him on the plastic-covered mattress pad. it squeaks slightly under their combined weight. “did you talk to jiwoong hyung about this?” hanbin asks. gyuvin only shakes his head, “he’ll just worry about me. i don’t want him to start treating me like a baby again.”
but hanbin gets it, he really does. even though he’s an older brother himself, he also grew up with jiwoong’s support too. his older cousin was a rock for him, but as he got older, hanbin became more and more terrified of disappointing him.
“he won’t. you should talk to him about it. i know it’s a big change, but all of us are here for you,” hanbin reassures gyuvin, “if you need help from someone, just ask. promise me?”
he reaches out to squeeze gyuvin’s hand, but the younger springs up from the mattress and wraps him in a bear hug. half the time, hanbin and gyuvin were the ones mistaken for being brothers, especially once jiwoong went to college four years ago.
“alright, come on. let me go,” hanbin taps gyuvin’s back, but the other just lets his long limbs squeeze him tighter, “gyuvin, we’re on a schedule. let me help you unpack?”
finally, the younger releases him, “fine. i know you probably have some big party to plan or whatever, mr. social chair,” gyuvin teases him.
“you won’t be laughing when you’re the only freshman guy who gets an invite,” hanbin chides him, “you don’t want to be on the bad side of the person who controls the guest list.”
it turns out that gyuvin was really serious about having packed exclusively clothes, snacks, and his gaming computer, because it doesn’t take more than thirty minutes to arrange everything in a way that satisfies him. hanbin tries to steal a packet of candies for his efforts, but gyuvin slaps his hand away.
“hey! i only have a limited stock of those. if you’re going to take the goods, you’ll have to drive me four hours to the city to replace them,” gyuvin complains.
“whatever,” hanbin would be happy to drive gyuvin if he asked, but isn’t sure how soon again he can handle another road trip when the whole group inevitably decided they wanted to go, “are we good here? do you want to stay or come to the house to find matthew and hyung?”
*
gyuvin peers down the hall to find it still mostly empty. there are a few more doors open, like a couple other freshmen have started moving in, but no one has really started socializing yet, “i’ll go with you, i guess.”
“you guess? you should be glad i’m not abandoning you here in this smelly old dorm on your first day,” hanbin crosses his arms.
“yay,” gyuvin deadpans, “i get enjoy the smelly old fraternity house instead.”
hanbin rolls his eyes and steps into the hallway, “you don’t have to come if you don’t want to.”
they pass a struggling mother and her seemingly apathetic son dragging a massive cart of suitcases down the hallway. she’s already lecturing him about forgetting something, loudly.
“hope that’s not your roommate,” hanbin whispers to gyuvin.
in horror, gyuvin watches as the duo stop in front the very door gyuvin and hanbin had just vacated.
“oh, kill me now,” gyuvin seems about ready to cry.
“i’m sure it will be fine. do you want to introduce yourself?” hanbin asks.
gyuvin takes one more look at the frazzled blonde woman, watching her son fumble with his keys.
“later. let’s let them settle in first,” gyuvin suggests, like his decision is more about politeness rather than fear of interacting with either of the pair or his roommate’s mountain of belongings.
on the ground floor, gyuvin notices a pair of asian guys struggle with an armada of matching black suitcases.
“the elevator is broken,” one of them says sheepishly, he looks a bit younger than the other man, a shock of platinum blond hair and pair of expensive-looking sunglasses perched on his head. the other man that the blond is with swears in another language, probably chinese, gyuvin thinks, though he isn’t certain.
“i’m going to talk to the staff,” the second man announces loudly before turning on his heel and stalking off to find one of the workers in the building that are going to be able to do absolutely nothing to help them.
gyuvin will later say that his sudden desire to help them had nothing to do with these being the first asian people he’d seen in the college town other than his family, and even less to do with the fact that he’d thought the blond guy was unfairly attractive, and everything to do with the fact that he’s a very charitable human being.
“do you need some help?” gyuvin asks, walking up to the blond man, who seemed to have given up on his friend and started the process of dragging the suitcases towards the stairs.
“please,” the man says gratefully, “my room is on the fourth floor though, if you don’t mind.”
“what a coincidence,” gyuvin can feel his face light up. this has to be fate. “i live on the fourth floor too!”
“oh,” the other scratches his head awkwardly, “that’s cool, i guess.”
“i’m gyuvin kim,” he introduces himself, trying to project all the sunshine and friendliness he can into the greeting, “what’s your name?”
“ricky shen,” the blond offers, not as enthusiastically, but also not uncaring either. gyuvin can work with this.
“oh!” gyuvin says, suddenly remembering his cousin behind them, “this is my cousin, hanbin sung. he’s a sophomore.”
hanbin folds himself into the conversation easily, he’s always been good at that. it’s a trait that gyuvin has always been a little jealous of, but ricky doesn’t seem to have been won over by hanbin’s natural charms. if anything, he just seems thankful to have any help at all.
“well, come on,” gyuvin gestures at the suitcases to hanbin, “ricky lives on the fourth floor too. i told him we’d help with the suitcases.”
gyuvin can tell that hanbin is doing everything he can to not audibly sigh aloud, perhaps he’s thinking of some excuse he can make to run away. but gyuvin knows he won’t, hanbin will help anyone who needs it, and ricky, who looks a bit like he’s never seen the weight room in his life, seems like he needs all the help he can get.
as they drag the suitcases up the stairs, gyuvin tries to work a bit more information out of ricky. he’s an international student from china, which gyuvin had guessed upon noticing that all the suitcases were luxury branded. he was accepted to the fine arts program, but had mostly chosen this university because his family friend already attended and recommended it to him.
ricky’s room is all the way at the end of the hall, which means gyuvin has to do his best not to cringe when they pass by his own room, where he can still hear the mother lecturing his roommate.
was it too early to put in a request for a room switch?
they put the first set of suitcases down, and gyuvin tries to subtly lean against the wall to not betray the strain of the stairs.
“we have to get the rest,” ricky complains, running a hand through his hair. gyuvin notices how even messy it looks styled, nothing like gyuvin’s hair, which he can feel has started to flop around his face limply from the humidity.
“the rest?” hanbin sounds defeated.
“sorry,” ricky has the nerve to look at least a little ashamed at the thought of the additional suitcases waiting for them at the bottom of the stairs.
by the time they manage to get the rest of the suitcases into the tiny dorm room, ricky’s friend has returned. “oh, there you are,” he says to ricky, not even noticing gyuvin, “i talked to the staff, but they said if we needed help we have to wait until the evening.”
ricky points to the pile of suitcases in the corner, “we got it handled.”
the other man turns around slowly, as if just noticing them for the first time, “oh.” he rubs at his eyes tiredly, “how did i miss that? how did they get up here?”
he walks towards the door as if expecting the answer to miraculously appear in front him.
ricky tries to pay gyuvin in cash for his and hanbin’s helps, which is probably more embarrassing for ricky than for gyuvin when the other point-blank refuses it.
“are you sure you don’t want anything?” ricky’s brows are furrowed, like he can’t believe gyuvin went through all the exercise of dragging his heavy suitcases up four flights of stairs for nothing.
“well i was hoping we could be friends?” gyuvin tilts his head, not fully giving his best rendition of puppy-eyes, but also not-not doing it either.
before ricky can answer, they hear a crashing sound coming from outside the door.
“wait, where did hanbin go?” gyuvin realizes they lost his cousin somewhere in the stairwell. they peer outside the door to see that hanbin has knocked the last suitcase over, flushed entirely red from the cheeks down, as ricky’s friend watches him curiously.
“sorry, sorry, sorry,” hanbin just keeps repeating, waffling further as he tries to right the dislodged suitcases.
“i’ll see you around?” gyuvin doesn’t want to force his friendship on ricky if the other doesn’t want it, but also, gyuvin knows that if ricky just gave him a chance they could be really great friends. he’s just got a gut feeling about it.
“yeah,” ricky says, distracted now as he pokes at his friend, “hao, are you okay?”
still stuttering over the suitcases, gyuvin has to practically drag hanbin away. once they reach the safety of the stairwell, gyuvin asks, “what happened? if you were that tired you could have asked us for help.”
hanbin seems to flush further at the memory, which is concerning, because at least half the blood in hanbin’s body already seems to be in his face and neck.
“he called me his guardian angel,” hanbin whispers, looking down at his shoes instead of waiting for gyuvin’s reaction.
the gears turn in gyuvin’s head for approximately ten seconds before it all clicks into place, “wait. ricky’s friend? this is about ricky’s friend?” his tone raises with each realization, and he slaps at hanbin’s should excitedly, “oh my god, you like him!”
hanbin shakes his head quickly, “no, no, no, i was just surprised! that’s all. he seemed really out of it. i don’t think he knew what he was saying.”
gyuvin just laughs, “i don’t think so. maybe he liked you too. did you get his name?”
hanbin shakes his head miserably, “god that was so fucking embarrassing. i can’t ever see him again.”
the ribbing smile drops from gyuvin’s face, “no way! should we go back right now? you can’t give up like this!” his cousin wasn’t the type to like someone so easily, which was why gyuvin had started teasing him in the first place. even throughout high school, hanbin had never really pursued anyone. he meets someone gyuvin’s first day of university, and he’s just going to let it go?
“no way,” hanbin’s eyes widen, “i can’t face him again. not happening.”
gyuvin rolls his eyes, “fine. you’re so boring. let’s just go to your stinky frat house.”
“i already said it wasn’t--” gyuvin ignores his complaints and takes the stairs two at a time. university already seems to be getting better and better.
2 - “we have matching costumes”
as much as hanbin tried to forget ricky’s friend, he found himself more infatuated with the other than he’d ever admit (if anyone asked gyuvin, he would just laugh. hanbin didn’t have to admit it, he was obvious enough without saying anything at all). later that day, hanbin even caught himself nonsensically thinking that the other man had been wrong to call hanbin his guardian angel, when it was clear he was the only angel in the room. in the few minutes they’d spent in each other’s presence, hanbin felt like the other’s image had been burned permanently into the back of his mind.
he was so cute that hanbin just wanted to bother him, his features sharp, but something about them impeccably soft. was that normal? was he going insane?
hanbin had seen a lot of beautiful people before, but there was something about the other that hanbin just couldn’t shake. objectively, he had to be in the top five most attractive people at their college, hanbin was sure, he just wondered why he’d never seen the other before. well, he could be a freshman, hanbin supposed, but he seemed a bit older than ricky, and he didn’t have his things with him either. perhaps he’d been helping ricky to move in just like hanbin had for gyuvin. this meant he was just as kind as he was handsome, hanbin thinks to himself, and then pinches his arm because how single and touch-deprived has he gotten that he’s fallen half in love with the first man to compliment him since coming back to school?
the next time he sees gyuvin, he thinks he makes a commendable effort in not saying anything about what is quickly developing into a nasty crush. gyuvin can probably tell that he’s a bit on edge, but hanbin will just blame school or work for the stress, not the fact that he has to physically bite his tongue in order not to ask if gyuvin has seen the other man since move-in day. ultimately, it’s gyuvin who brings ricky up again first, which hanbin thinks means that it’s totally fair game to ask about his friend.
“and when i tripped right in front of that girl during welcome week, he just laughed at me! i didn’t even like her that much, i only did it because he was egging me on,” gyuvin complains about an embarrassing mishap from the week before that hanbin has already heard about several times both over text and through the phone from his cousin. still, he listens patiently.
“then, later he had the nerve to accuse me of having a crush on him or something!” gyuvin’s rant continues, and hanbin swirls the straw of his coffee absentmindedly. why is it so hot in this town, and why had the school never invested in air conditioners?
“and what did you tell him?” hanbin says after realizing gyuvin was waiting for his response.
“of course i told him never !” gyuvin insists, crossing his arms.
“and how did he take that?” hanbin asks, now actually a bit interested in the story. gyuvin had never talked about this part before.
“well, he actually seemed kind of offended. but, then he just started telling me something about some anime thing and never brought it up again,” gyuvin replies.
“hm,” hanbin hums. he doesn’t really know ricky at all, so there’s nothing more he can take from the conversation other than what gyuvin is telling him. but he would be curious to know if ricky had been burned by gyuvin’s comment more than he was letting on, “well it seems like your friendship has gotten stronger lately, from all the instagram stories.”
apparently ricky was somewhat of an influencer on the social media app, but from the pile of louis vuitton suitcases he’d dragged up the stairs, hanbin wasn’t surprised about that either. still, gyuvin had been making more and more frequent appearances on the page, if the reshares on gyuvin’s own stories were anything to go by. hanbin had then followed ricky too, solely to keep track of gyuvin, not because he was hoping to spot ricky’s friend on the page.
speaking of ricky’s friend, “hey, you haven’t happened to see that guy again. the one from move in day?” hanbin wonders, trying to be as subtle as possible.
it doesn’t work, gyuvin’s face slips right into a knowing smirk, “you mean hao?”
“you’ve seen him again?” hanbin tries to keep the shock out of his voice. he needs to stay calm, or gyuvin is going to never let it go or let him live this down.
“yeah, he comes to see ricky all the time. he acts like he’s just doing ricky’s parents a favor and nags him about eating well and homework and whatnot,” gyuvin explains, “but i think they’re actually really close.”
something drops in hanbin’s chest, and he struggles to pick it up before it shows on his face, “close like…?”
gyuvin puts a hand over his face tiredly, like he can’t believe hanbin’s audacity, “not like that, stupid. close like they’re friends, maybe best friends, but i’m not sure.”
“oh,” hanbin says dumbly, but it’s his fault for jumping to conclusions.
“yeah, oh,” gyuvin teases, “and i’m pretty sure he’s single too. why else would he be hanging around a freshman all the time?”
“you don’t know for sure though,” hanbin tries to convince himself more than argue with gyuvin. it’s easier to pretend his crush is unattainable than to know he’s available, but hanbin never stood a chance.
*
the semester goes on. gyuvin somehow becomes ricky’s best friend. hanbin makes no progress on the actually talking to hao front, and relies on whatever tiny morsels of information gyuvin gives him whenever he starts talking about ricky. apparently, his angel is a double major: biochemistry and violin performance. gyuvin mentions that he has a recital coming up, but hanbin thinks it would be creepy if he just showed up, knowing there’s at least an 80% chance he fails to work up the courage to say anything to hao at all. it turns out to be the right choice, as gyuvin breaks the news to him afterwards that hao’s not-quite but potentially future boyfriend had been there.
“he’s such an ass,” gyuvin complains, “he didn’t talk to anyone except hao, and even then it didn’t seem like he was really paying attention. if he didn’t like classical music, he shouldn’t have come. i think hao was really disappointed.”
the jealous creature in hanbin’s chest reminds him that hanbin would listen to classical music every hour of every day for the rest of his life if it meant that hao would give him a second glance instead.
“but i swear they’re not together!” gyuvin says firmly, “i really think you have a chance hyung.”
it’s too late for that, hanbin’s already written it off. who knows, maybe hao really isn’t anything like the pedestal that hanbin had built for him in his mind anyways.
*
it’s halloween night, and hao zhang is everything that hanbin could have imagined, if not better. he’s funny, and maybe (if hanbin lets the delusions win) likes hanbin at least a little bit too.
gyuvin had explained the plan in detail to him and jiwoong the night before, revealing that he had a friend who was looking for a date to their formal at the end of the semester, preferably someone on the executive board. hanbin, who was a good actor, but not particularly interested in entering one of gyuvin’s usually ridiculous schemes, planned to let jiwoong have this one if he was down. it’s not like jiwoong would be seeing anyone seriously by the end of the semester. after a failed attempt at bringing his freshman girlfriend home for chuseok, jiwoong had sworn off dating altogether. she had been nice enough, but their whole family had been a lot for her, and she’d been out of her depth and unwilling to learn even the most basic traditions of their culture. needless to say, jiwoong and all his campus-wide fame would probably be plenty for gyuvin’s friend. why they were so desperate to get into the zrho formal, hanbin had no idea. they weren’t one of the most high tier fraternities on campus to say the least, though they probably had one of the cleanest records, at least since jiwoong had taken over the chapter.
“he’s pretty adamant about being set up with jiwoong hyung,” gyuvin admits, “but um…” he trails off as if there’s something more he wants to say, but isn’t sure he’s ready to or allowed to reveal it.
“it’s a guy then,” jiwoong confirms, and gyuvin nods, “that’s fine with me, really. you can tell him that’s all good on my side.”
“it’s not that,” gyuvin replies, “it’s just, well…” he turns to hanbin now.
“it’s one of ricky’s friends, and he’s a sophomore so…” he keeps pausing, and looking at hanbin like he’s trying to pass a secret message to him that is going straight over hanbin’s head.
“the age thing doesn’t matter to me either,” jiwoong doesn’t seem to notice gyuvin staring daggers at hanbin.
finally, gyuvin just groans and gives up the secret, “it’s hao zhang.”
hanbin freezes where he’s been peeling an orange as a post work-out snack, and he hopes that neither of his cousins notice.
“oh, you should have just said it was hanbin’s crush,” jiwoong replies plainly, “he’s all yours then.”
“you know?” gyuvin bursts out in shock, looking at jiwoong in surprise before wheeling around at hanbin, who seems to be trying to melt into his seat.
“about hanbin’s hopeless simping? yeah. he’s a chatty drunk,” jiwoong shrugs, and hanbin feels himself flush even further. it’s not like he had that many people he was comfortable talking about his feelings with, and he knew that since jiwoong had the least odds of ever encountering hao, he was probably the safest option. apparently not.
“don’t mess this up,” gyuvin points a finger at hanbin, “he’s practically fallen right into your lap now.”
turning this time to face jiwoong, he continues, “i have to introduce him to jiwoong hyung on halloween first, but i’m sure jiwoong hyung can work something out right?”
flashing a thumbs up, jiwoong smirks at hanbin, “don’t worry, i wouldn’t dare do anything to your man.”
“hey! i never said i would do it,” hanbin crosses his arms against his chest, trying to maintain some semblance of control over the situation.
not bothering to say anything, gyuvin and jiwoong just turn to look at him knowingly. the decision was made as soon as gyuvin had said hao’s name. his cousin was right, he was lucky enough to get a second chance with hao, there’s no way he can let the other go again.
“did he say why he needed a date anyway?” hanbin finally asks, resigned.
the smile drops from gyuvin’s face, “you’ll have to ask him. it’s not my story to tell.”
*
unfortunately, it’s obvious from the beginning that hao doesn’t remember hanbin at all. hanbin tries not to let it faze him, it’s not like they’d even exchanged names on that day. it was too much for hanbin to hope that hao had been thinking of him just as often as he’d thought of the other.
when one of his friends points out their matching costumes, it takes everything in hanbin to hold back his blush. of course gyuvin had to go and coordinate their costumes without informing him, a cat and mouse? really original. except hao seems thrown off by the comment altogether, so hanbin rushes to change the subject, not wanting him to be uncomfortable. he does the silly hamster pose that gyuvin always makes fun of him for, saying it’s the reason he can never get a boyfriend, but hao seems to find it funny, so hanbin gives himself a plus one and keeps talking.
things are going so well with hao that hanbin almost slips up and asks the other out for real. okay, so maybe it wasn’t an almost. it happened when hanbin got too brave, too infatuated with his crush who’d just had his heart broken by a pledge hanbin forgot existed, that he went too far and said something he shouldn’t have. hao was recovering from a breakup, he only needed a date to formal, he didn’t need a new boyfriend.
“in terms of the hierarchy in the house, if you were my boyfriend then…” hanbin says, all false confidence. he was always too honest when he drank, and hao was about to get a first row seat to watching him crash and burn.
to his surprise, hao steps forward and places a hand against hanbin’s forehead, “are you drunk?” he asks. not even close, but hanbin can feel his face warm under hao’s touch.
“not seriously!” hanbin clarifies quickly, trying to save face, “just for appearances. you can come in the house, make him jealous, and whatever. then after formal if you want you can fake dump me, and make a scene, and get your revenge on all the frat boys of zeta chi rho to your heart’s content.”
he thinks he covered his mistake up well, offering himself up on a silver platter for whatever hao wanted him for. it’s getting bad, hanbin knows, that he would let this boy dump him in heartbeat in front of all his brothers, with said boy not knowing that hanbin’s real heart would be broken in the process too.
it’s probably the stupidest idea hanbin has ever had, but as hao practically glows, and laughs at hanbin’s jokes, hanbin can’t bring himself to regret it at all. so he makes up some lie about not wanting to be embarrassed by his brothers anymore, even though he knows that the appearance of hao at the house will make the teasing about a hundred times worse, and lets himself fall.
oh, and then hao had basically kissed him, and hanbin had to stop himself from melting against the tree and giving everything away right there.
part of hanbin already knows there’s no way this is going to end well, but when he spins hao around the zrho basement, the two of them drunk on their laughter and the drinks hanbin makes them in the secret kitchen, he wishes this night could last forever.
3 - “we’re just practicing”
unsurprisingly, gyuvin’s phone call is what stirs him from his hangover induced slumber sunday afternoon.
“what the hell did you do?” is how gyuvin greets him, and hanbin rubs his eyes as he prepares for the oncoming lecture. the clock says it’s already 2 pm, which means that by some bouncing and pattern of connections, gyuvin probably knows everything already.
“is it bad that i kind of want to kill him?” hanbin asks, “or maybe just find some way to get him kicked out of the fraternity permanently?”
“who?” gyuvin sounds confused.
“john. hao’s ex,” hanbin replies, a frown taking over his face at just the mention of the other’s name, “how could he just throw hao away like that? what an ass.”
“you don’t have to tell me,” gyuvin replies, “i told you from the beginning he was bad news. but maybe you should be more appreciative, without his idiocy, you wouldn’t have a boyfriend right now.”
“i don’t have a boyfriend?” hanbin responds, confused.
“don’t tell me you forgot,” gyuvin deadpans into the phone, like he can’t believe hanbin’s insolence. of course hanbin remembers, he remembers everything that happened the night before, he just didn’t think hao was going to tell his friends about it so soon.
“he doesn’t think i’m pathetic, right?” hanbin worries.
“he seemed kind of smitten, if i’m being totally honest,” gyuvin replies, “i don’t know what you did to him last night, but i’ve never seen him so flustered talking about someone.”
“maybe he was just embarrassed,” hanbin tries to convince himself, he doesn’t want to get his hopes up.
“sung hanbin!” gyuvin switches to korean, which he only does when he doesn’t want his roommate to understand him, or when he’s about to drop a bombshell on hanbin’s sanity, “i knew you were a bit of a loser, but i didn’t think you were a coward too.”
“what am i supposed to do,” hanbin replies miserably, “i told him he could break up with me whenever he wanted.”
he can practically hear gyuvin roll his eyes through the phone, “then convince him not to. come on, the hard part’s done now. you have a built in excuse to be around him all the time, you just have to figure out how to win him over.”
that’s a task that is easier said than done.
*
still, hanbin throws himself entirely into this fake relationship with hao starting the monday after halloween. gyuvin was right, hanbin will wonder forever if he doesn’t at least try. he takes to walking hao to all his classes in the morning, he gives him free coffee and pastries out of his own paycheck at the cafe, and he puts up with gyuvin’s endless teasing every time he sees his cousin. the scariest part is just how easy it all is. hanbin is in so deep that all of this just feels natural. there’s a wretched part of him that insists it wouldn’t be so easy if hao didn’t want it too, if hao didn’t clutch onto his arm walking to school, if hao didn’t find his way to the cafe coincidentally every time hanbin was on his shift.
though he comes up with the idea to invite hao over for thanksgiving on his own, he runs it by matthew first.
“you’re so whipped for this guy it’s actually embarrassing,” is the first thing out of matthew’s mouth which, thank you, he’s well aware.
“he’ll be the first one someone brings home since…” hanbin trails off before naming jiwoong’s ex girlfriend. she’s a bit of a sore subject among the group, particularly matthew, who always claimed to have never liked her in the first place. hanbin thinks matthew is just bitter that she kept mistaking him for being one of jiwoong’s brothers, even when he’d made it clear that he was not actually related to neither the kim nor the sung families.
“do you think he can handle it?” matthew asks.
hanbin wants to say that he doesn’t think that there’s anything hao can’t handle, he’s one of the most resilient people hanbin has ever met, but he doesn’t think that will do him any favors on the proving he isn’t whipped front.
“do you think you can handle it?” matthew pushes, prodding and hitting right at the lump of feelings in his chest that have only grown since halloween.
“i can make it work,” hanbin insists, “i just really don’t want him to be alone.”
matthew scoffs, “yeah, sure. but whatever dude, it’s your funeral when you have to explain everything to your family.”
“i’m not going to tell them,” hanbin responds to matthew, whose eyes widen in surprise.
“you’re going to introduce him as your boyfriend?” matthew questions, “and you think he’s just going to go along with it.”
“he owes me a favor for formal,” hanbin points out.
matthew just sighs, “you’re going to break your own heart because you’re too kind for your own good.”
“you’ll play along though, right? everyone has to be in on it for it to be convincing,” hanbin pressures.
“yeah, of course i will, but hanbin, really think about it, okay? you need to take care of yourself too.”
*
but there’s nothing to worry about, because thanksgiving goes off without a hitch. matthew takes every opportunity to make fun of them, but hao doesn’t seem rattled at all. he wins over his mother in seconds (expected), gunwook by lunch (not unexpected), and yujin by the evening (hanbin is still reeling from that one). hanbin is almost inclined to tell hao to stop before hanbin’s mother has their wedding arranged for the summer time, but he knows that there’s no way hao is doing it on purpose. the other is just like that, and hanbin’s family are the latest victims to fall for the other’s charms.
of course hanbin had to go and screw it all up again, telling hao about his own sad love life, only for hao to turn it around on him and confess his own experiences hadn’t been perfect either. when hao tells him that there’s someone perfect out there waiting for him, hanbin wants to grab the older by the shoulders and hold him until hao understands that the person he’s been waiting for is in front of him right now.
but that wouldn’t be fair, and even from the beginning hao never said that he was looking for a new relationship. it was hanbin’s fault for falling, hanbin’s fault for not being honest, and in a few weeks it would be hanbin’s fault when hao broke up with him after formal.
maybe they could stay friends at least, some desperate part of hanbin hoped. another treacherous part of his heart reminds him that he’ll never be satisfied with just that. hanbin has always been patient, but he’s also always been greedy, and to watch hao fall in love with someone else is not something he thinks he could survive.
*
yujin catches him off guard that evening, when hao is helping his mother with dishes, and hanbin is trying to resist the urge to eavesdrop just to make sure his mother hasn’t started interrogating hao on his preferred wedding color palettes, and whether he’d mind getting married in hanbin’s hometown, or if he had some place else in mind.
“you seem a lot happier,” yujin comes to sit down beside him, still in his pajamas after breakfast, and hanbin ruffles a hand through his brother’s bedhead, making the whole thing even worse. yujin grumbles but doesn’t push him away.
“the second year is easier than the first,” hanbin tells him, “you’re already used to everything.”
yujin shakes his head, “you seem happier because of him.”
“oh,” hanbin doesn’t know what to say to that. he knows that he’s quite obvious, and he’s always worn his heart on his sleeve for everyone to see, but it’s still a bit embarrassing to have his younger brother call him out for it.
“why didn’t you tell me?” yujin turns to hanbin, trying to meet his eyes, but hanbin keeps looking away. he’s never been able to lie to his brother well.
“you used to tell me everything, and you would call me all the time,” yujin continues, “i know you’ve been busy, but you haven’t talked to me in weeks.”
“yujin, i’m sorry,” hanbin starts to say, but his younger brother cuts him off.
“i’m not mad, i knew eventually you would find someone, and they would take up your time, so some things would have to change, but,” yujin bites his lip, “i guess i just didn’t think it would be so soon.”
“i promise, i’ll tell you next time,” hanbin swears, “and i’ll call you at least once a week, okay? if i forget, just call me first, i’ll pick up. i promise.”
“next time?” yujin asks, “you think there’s going to be a next time? hyung, i’m not blind. i can see that you love him.”
“i-” hanbin doesn’t know what to say, he’s never confronted his feelings, never put them into words like that, and doesn’t want to say anything with hao just a room away. is that what this is, the feeling in his chest like he’s almost at the precipice of something, but is too terrified to look down? is love on the other side, or is it heartbreak that hanbin is hurtling towards?
“whether he knows or not yet” yujin seems to realize, “you’re going to hold onto him.”
hanbin tries to jump in again, to clear up whatever misunderstanding yujin seems to have, but the younger just keeps going. “and you’ll have a summer wedding, and mom will cry, and i’ll fight with gyuvin and matthew to be your best man, but even if i have to be the flower girl, i’ll be in the wedding party somehow.”
“yujin, we’ve only been together a few months. where’s all this coming from?” hanbin asks, did their mother get to him too? yujin sniffles a little bit. is he crying?
“yujin, what’s going on?” hanbin pulls his brother in tightly, “is something wrong?”
“you’re all leaving me,” yujin finally cries, burying his face in hanbin’s shirt.
“what?” hanbin pulls yujin closer, “we’re not leaving, promise.”
“jiwoong hyung is going to graduate next year, and who knows where he’ll go. then gunwook is going to go to university with you guys, and i’m just going to be stuck here,” yujin mumbles, “and then you’re going to get married, and i’ll never see you again.”
“yujin-ah, i swear that’s not going to happen,” hanbin promises, “and even if i do get married,” to hao, which is a pipe dream if hanbin had ever heard one, “i’m not going to leave you behind. you’re stuck with me for life, you’re my brother. i’m going to help you move into your dorm, and cheer the loudest when you graduate,” he smothers yujin until his brother starts squirming to get out of hanbin’s embrace.
“would you break up with him if i asked?” yujin says suddenly, and hanbin freezes in place, letting yujin go fully.
but yujin seems to take the silence as answer enough, smiling wetly, “good. because i really like hao, so you have to prove yourself as worthy enough for him too.”
hanbin smiles, if only yujin knew how right he was about that.
4 - "sorry, the number you have dialed is unavailable"
hanbin doesn’t know what he did wrong, but every single one of his texts to hao in the last three days have gone unanswered. at first, hanbin just tried to convince himself that hao was busy, but it was obvious now that hao was avoiding him.
the first time he hadn’t shown up to the zrho’s house to walk to their classes together in the morning, hanbin had been worried sick. he spammed the other with messages, he’d called, convinced that something terrible had happened. then when hao hadn’t responded to those messages, he’d thought that maybe he had come across as too clingy, that hao needed space.
so he stopped checking in, pretended it wasn’t killing him to not know if the other was okay. next, hao stopped coming to the cafe when hanbin was on shift, and his co-workers confirmed they hadn’t seen the man during their hours at the bar either. in less than the span of a week, hao had almost entirely disappeared from every aspect of hanbin’s life that he’d infiltrated in the past month, and hanbin had never felt emptier. he didn’t realize just how critical hao’s presence had become to him, how he couldn’t work without worrying why the other wasn’t at his usual table, couldn’t even be at the zrho house without remembering all the times hao had been over to hang out with him and matthew.
he’d even taken to sleeping over at jiwoong’s apartment, who seemed to be going through something of his own, and had no problem commiserating over copious amounts of alcohol until hanbin passed out on his couch. when jiwoong finds out that hao’s friend taerae has been the one matthew’s been having over in hanbin’s absence, he joins hanbin on the couch for the first time.
“what happened hyung?” hanbin finally gets the courage to ask jiwoong, who seemed to reserve his nights of binge drinking for party weekends now that he was a senior. he hadn’t seen the man this drunk outside of a basement rager in months.
“i think i got dumped,” jiwoong confesses, face down on one of the couches.
“ you? ” hanbin tries to keep the surprise out of his voice, “i didn’t know you were seeing anyone?”
“i was trying to,” jiwoong admits, “it didn’t go well, obviously.” he sighs and rolls over, facing the ceiling, “i thought boys would be easier to understand, turns out it just hurts more when you strike out.”
hanbin still can’t get over the fact that his cousin, fraternity president with his own fanclub on instagram, had started seeing someone, and hanbin hadn’t heard anything about it.
“it’s those stem majors,” jiwoong slurs, “they’re too smart for us, hanbin.”
“who was it?” hanbin prods at jiwoong’s side so he’ll turn to face him.
“your boyfriend’s friend, taerae,” even though hanbin can tell jiwoong is hurt, he still says taerae’s name in such an affectionate way, that hanbin wonders if he can’t get away with just a little bit of teasing.
“he was matthew’s roommate freshman year,” hanbin reveals, “he’s been right under your nose this whole time. wow, i can’t believe it. finally, a man that could get the great jiwoong kim to date again.”
“doesn’t matter. he doesn’t want me,” jiwoong says pitifully.
“stop being such a sod,” hanbin taps jiwoong so he won’t turn away again, “what did he say when he broke things off?”
“just that he didn’t think it was going to work out, so we shouldn’t see each other anymore,” jiwoong recalls dramatically, “i don’t think he meant it to come out so harsh, but i got the message. he hates me.”
hanbin sits down on the floor, leaning his back against the arm of the couch that jiwoong is laying on, “i’m sure he doesn’t hate you.”
“do you think he found out about the scheme?” jiwoong asked suddenly, “do you think gyuvin would have told him?”
“the scheme…?” now hanbin is totally lost.
“about me helping set you up with hao.”
hanbin’s heart thuds in his chest, “do you think he told hao too?”
is that why hao wasn’t talking to him anymore? had gyuvin let out the secret that hanbin had liked hao the whole time? that the whole thing wasn’t a blind set-up at all? that hanbin had been taking advantage of hao’s situation for weeks because he couldn’t control his own feelings?
“no, i don’t think gyuvin would do that,” jiwoong tries to reassure him, but the seeds of doubt were already planted. hanbin stumbles to grab his phone off the table, scrolling to find his message history with hao for some kind of clue.
a new message pings.
“he sent me something,” hanbin fumbles, nearly dropping the phone.
“what does it say?” jiwoong leans over curiously, “i thought you said he wasn’t texting you back?”
“he hasn’t, not in a week,” hanbin frowns, scrolling down to the bottom of the chat.
“happy for you. let me know if we are off for formal?” hanbin reads out loud, confused, “what? what is he talking about?”
hanbin rapidly types out a message asking hao why he thinks that hanbin would cancel their date to formal. if anyone was going to cancel, shouldn’t it be hao who was avoiding him? then he decides that he needs to hear it from hao directly, in a way the other can’t ignore. he dials the number only to receive the answering machine automatically.
“sorry, the number you have dialed is unavailable,” the robotic voice informs him.
“he blocked me,” hanbin whispers, dialing again, “oh my god, he blocked me?”
jiwoong meets his wide gaze in confusion, “what the hell did you do to him?”
“i have no clue,” hanbin turns the phone off and slides it across the floor until it’s hidden behind the other couch. he can’t bear to look at it anymore.
“you should tell him,” jiwoong looks at hanbin resolutely, brows knit together, “if he doesn’t know already.”
hanbin lets his head fall against the back of the couch, “i’d tell him whatever he wants if only he would let me see him again.”
*
hanbinnie
hao, are you okay?
you didn’t come to the house this morning.
are you sick? do you want me to bring you anything?
sent at 9:31 am
hanbinnie
matthew told me that taerae said you were fine, i’m glad.
let me know if there’s anything i can do to help.
sent at 1:45 pm
hanbinnie
is something going on?
sent at 10:30 am
hanbinnie
good luck on your lab today, can we talk soon?
sent at 7:21 am
hanbinnie
did i do something wrong?
hao, please talk to me
hao whatever i did, i’m sorry
please, let’s fix this
sent at 10:38 pm
hanbinnie
i really like you
maybe i even love you
i really don’t want to lose you
i just wanted you to know
messages deleted at 1:45 am
hanbinnie
if you don’t want to talk to me anymore, it’s fine
just please, let me know if you’re okay?
read at 11:21 pm
hao <3
happy for you. lmk if we are off for formal?
+1 - “you were already mine”
hanbin wakes up disoriented in hao’s bed, but even with the warmth of hao asleep and curled at his side, he feels frozen. he shouldn’t have gone to the social last night, gyuvin had dragged him out in hopes it would make him feel better, when hanbin had planned to just hide in the storage room on the excuse of organizing their supplies. he really needed to invest in better coping mechanisms.
if hao didn’t hate him before, he would most certainly hate him now. what was he thinking, showing up here, forcing himself into the house, taking advantage of hao’s kindness and…
at the memory of the night before, hanbin shuts his eyes tight and resists the urge to turn over and scream into the pillow. the image of hao straddling him was probably going to haunt him for the rest of his life. fuck , he’s never going to drink again.
he carefully extricates himself from the sheets, slipping across the hallway and down the stairs. it’s a cowards move, but hanbin doesn’t think he’s ready to face the consequences of his actions.
two figures stop him in the kitchen, taerae and jiwoong sitting at the breakfast counter, their two mugs of coffee steaming as they watch him struggle to find his shoes in the living room.
“where do you think you’re going?” taerae cocks his head to the side, stare burning into the back of his head.
“home?” hanbin tries, embarrassed to be caught so blatantly.
taerae shakes his head, “try again.”
“he’s going to hate me,” hanbin whines, trying to plead his case. taerae just rolls his eyes, “he kissed you back, didn’t he? only one of you was drunk as fuck last night.”
this is true, hanbin’s fantasy from the night before did include hao pulling him in, though he thought that might have just been wishful thinking.
“go take a shower, he’ll be up soon,” taerae tells him, “bathroom’s at the opposite end of the hall. towels are in the closet on the left.” hanbin obediently turns back to the stairs, silently begging jiwoong to save him, but the other doesn’t seem to be interested in anything but stirring sugar into his and taerae’s mugs of coffee. so he makes up with his ex and decides to throw hanbin to the wolves? hanbin won’t forget this.
all his memories of the night before replay in vivid detail under the hot spray of the shower. hanbin hates to give himself hope, but could taerae be right? hao could have pushed him away, and he seemed obsessed with the idea that there was someone else. but there was no one except hao, hanbin just needed to make sure hao knew that too.
*
hanbin barely takes the time to pull the car into an acceptable parking spot before he’s out the door. how is it that hao is always running away from him? he feels like he’s in some kind of twisted fairytale, doomed to chase after hao again and again and never catch him. but still, he refuses to give up. hao might not have left him a glass slipper, but on foot, hanbin reaches him before he’s halfway down the block.
on pure adrenaline, hanbin manages to reveal the truth, “i’ve liked you since the day we first met. i just didn’t think i ever had a chance,” does he keep going? fuck it. “i was trying to prove myself to you, it was always real to me.”
and once he’s on a roll, he can’t seem to stop, the feelings spilling out of him now that the dam has finally been broken,“i’m most sorry about last night. that’s not how i wanted it to happen, but jiwoong was right, i’d never have the courage to confront you if i waited.”
“how would you have wanted it to happen?” hao asks him, and it feels like an olive branch, or maybe the glow of an angel finally granting hanbin a reprieve. hanbin wants to kiss furrow out of hao’s expression, because if it were up to him, hao would never have anything to worry about again, least of all anything caused by hanbin.
“can i show you?”
they come together, hanbin reaching up instinctively to cup the back of hao’s neck like he’s never held something so precious in his hands before, because he knows he never has. the sensation of their kiss is so much better sober, when hanbin can feel every movement of hao against him, and he isn’t squinting from the harshness of hao’s bedroom light. he doesn’t even care that half the street might be watching them, so long as hao never lets him go again. regrettably, hanbin has to pull back first, ruefully ensuring there’s still a few inches between them so he can ask the question he’s wanted to since halloween.
“let’s be boyfriends,” hanbin pronounces, tagging on, “for real this time.”
“shut up, you were already mine,” hao mumbles, and hanbin doesn’t think he’s heard sweeter words in his life. hao pulls him in again, and hanbin laughs into the kiss.
of course he was, he’s always been hao’s, even before the other knew it.
*
frat boys are not known for being particularly lucky in the love department. to be fair, most of that is of their own doing. the culture doesn’t really advocate for longevity, unless the individual is willing to fight for it. and up until that point, hanbin had never been particularly lucky when it came to love either, though he wouldn’t necessarily blame that solely on his membership in the brotherhood.
but by his final year, it’s well known that senior member of zeta chi rho hanbin sung has a shadow whenever he visits the fraternity house. said shadow was quite offended when he found out about his nickname, to the point that hanbin had to offer to stage an intervention among the pledges in order to end the use of the moniker.
“why am i the shadow?” hao had complained, “it’s you who can’t be apart from me.”
hanbin looks down to where hao has wrapped himself tightly against hanbin’s side, both arms curled around hanbin’s right. he thinks the nickname might bear some truth, though hao isn’t wrong in his claim of hanbin’s attachment either. hanbin knows they’re both a little insufferable, and so he’ll spare hao from hearing the nickname that they’ve taken to calling him when hao isn’t around.
he doesn’t live in the house anymore, not since he’d moved in with hao their junior year, to the surprise of absolutely no one. he found that their third year, his boyfriend had picked up a bit of a shadow too, in the form of gunwook who became an unofficial third resident of their apartment given the amount of time he spent with hao there studying. hanbin wasn’t jealous, at all.
several members of the fraternity had asked if hanbin was going to run to become the chapter president as a senior, but hanbin had already decided against it. he had better things to do with his time than manage a rowdy group of teenage boys on the weekends. now, saturdays were for dates with his boyfriend of two years, for holding him and reminding him not to stress too hard over his med school applications, and for secretly practicing mandarin dialogues out of the textbook he had hiding in the back of their closet. sundays were much of the same, except for the addition of his weekly call back home to yujin, subtly dodging questions about his plans for the future and the status of the ring box that was tucked into a a pair of socks next to the textbook.
hao pads softly into their bedroom, socked feet against the wooden floor. “gunwook left?” hanbin confirms.
“you don’t have to be jealous of a baby,” hao teases him, pinching his cheek lightly. hanbin dodges his lover’s wandering fingers and leans in to kiss him gently.
“i’m not jealous,” hanbin pouts as he pulls away, “but i thought weekends were just for us.”
hao flops down beside him on bed, tugging on hanbin’s arm until he gets the message and pulls himself over to press their lips together gently. “besides,” hao complains, a sneaky hand curving around the back of hanbin’s neck, preventing him from pulling back farther than just a few inches from hao’s lips, “you were on the phone with yujin forever.”
“he’s lonely,” hanbin justifies, “he probably would have liked to talk to you too.”
“i talked to him before,” hao reveals, “in between my classes on friday.”
hanbin makes a humming noise before pulling hao in for another kiss, sliding himself into the space between hao’s knees. he hopes yujin hadn’t given anything away, though he trusted that his younger brother could keep the secret for at least a few more weeks.
this is what sundays are supposed to be for, lazily making out with his boyfriend while the world moves on around them, offering them just a bit of time in a bubble for a single afternoon each week.
“what do you think about going to california for spring break?” hao suggests, trying to sound casual about it, but hanbin can pick out a bit of nervousness in his expression, like after all this time hanbin would ever say no to him.
“to meet your family?” hanbin asks. he’d spoken to both of hao’s parents over the phone before, and even met kuan jui when he’d visited their university at the end of the last school year. still, he’d yet to actually visit california with hao, though he’d been thinking about it for a while.
…maybe since he’d heard hao talk about it for the first time back in their sophomore year, when their relationship hadn’t quite been defined the way it was now, as much as hanbin wished it would have been from the beginning. hao doesn’t need to know all that though.
“mhmm,” hao says, diving back in for another kiss, but hanbin holds him back so he can answer.
“i’d really like that,” hanbin makes sure hao can see the sincerity in his words. hao pouts, “you’re always so sappy.”
hanbin leans down to nuzzle his nose against hao’s jaw, “i want to know everything about you that you’ll tell me, of course i want to visit your home.”
clutching at the collar of hanbin’s shirt, hao pulls him back up, finally getting his kiss, “you’re so silly,” he pulls away for a moment, fingers pressed right over hanbin’s heart, “my home is right here.”
hanbin’s jaw drops at the audacity, and he lets his body cage hao’s completely, tickling at his sides, “and you say i’m the sappy one!”
“hanbin!” hao calls out, trying to squirm away, but hanbin refuses to let him go, pressing kisses all over his face.
perhaps hanbin was the one to fall first, but he was happy to have tumbled if it meant he could give hao a soft place to land when he finally came to hanbin’s side.