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"All That Glisters is Not Gold"

Summary:

*NO LONGER CANON IN THE UNIVERSE*

About two weeks after the suicide pact, the Elliot's decide to hold yet another gala.

And not for the loss to two beloved drones, oh no. Instead, to bathe in their egos.

However, Cyn has other plans.

And things are going to get bloody.

-

or; The Gala Massacre in The 'Until The Oil Splatters' Universe

Chapter 1

Notes:

*February Update*

Check chapter two.

Chapter Text

V stood over N’s lifeless body, waiting to see if he would wake up or not. The large X on her visor reflected off of his visor’s surface. She blinked and looked over her shoulder, watching the Absolute Solver work on reattaching Uzi’s head. V took in every single sound that came from over there. The oil splattering onto the ground, the scraps of the solver positioning Uzi’s head correctly.

She was tempted to lick the oil off the floor but repressed it and looked down at her hand, metal claws out. The humans she would kill with this hand. The blood that would spill everywhere. It would be beautiful.

“Groan,” Cyn muttered. “Is Big Brother awake yet?” V shook her head. “Eye roll, what would wake him up?”

V looked at N yet again, inspecting every part of him. “He’s already… dead,” she pressed.

“Shove,” V felt a shove on her arm. “Perhaps I could just possess him again, seemed to work the first time.” V lifted her hand and made a slithering motion. “Brain blast, oh, V. You are such a good help to me.”

Cyn lifted N to a sitting position and forced his mouth open. She extended one of her tentacles and made it slither in his mouth, wrapping around his tongue and trailing down his throat. N’s visor lit up and a conversation played out on its screen. A grin spread across Cyn’s face and she retracted the tentacle. 

“Welcome back, Big Brother,” she said, watching with great interest as her brother succumbed to the solver’s control. 

Large fleshy and boney wings sprouted from his back, hands cracking as they grained a host. His head fell forward, too heavy for his neck to hold. 

“N?” V asked, waving her hand in front of his face.

N’s head lifted up slightly, a golden X now covering his visor, a forced grin plastered on his face.

N looked down at his hands. He couldn’t talk. Couldn’t move his mouth. Seemingly sewn into this grin that wouldn’t go away. He pressed his hands to his face in an attempt to break this grin. Sure, N liked to smile. But this smile was painful to wear. He didn’t enjoy this smile.

“Tsk, Tsk. Big Brother,” Cyn said. “It will take some time for your body to get used to your new form. In the meantime, enjoy it!” she helped N lift his head up with her hands. “Your time is near, brother. Don’t waste it when it gets here,” she turned to V. “Make sure the gala is ready for our entrance.”

V nodded and quickly exited the basement, N listened to her pounding footsteps recede. Cyn let go of his face, making it fall yet again. “Now, I have a very important job for you. Stay here and watch over your girlfriend. I have to make sure no one runs out of line.”

If N had enough strength in him to nod, he would’ve. Instead, it was a small sway. Cyn took it as a nod and quickly left. The forced smile quickly disappeared as she left, leaving N to grab his face and press his hands against his cheeks. Sure enough, the smile was gone.

He looked around, looking for any sort of life down here. This was the first time he’d ever been in the basement ever . He’d never cared about it beforehand. It was just a random part of the mansion. 

How was Cyn alive? How was V alive? He had killed himself only to realize that they were alive the whole time. Real smart .

Watch after your girlfriend. That meant that Uzi was down here. How did she get here? Why was she here?

Way too many questions for my liking. N thought, using every bit of strength he had to move. Once he was finally stable on his feet, he figured he would try and get some answers himself. He looked around, trying to look for any sign of life other than himself in this room.

After some time, he heard the soft sound of frantic beeping. If his eyes were visible, they would have hollowed.

N looked towards the beeping and saw purple hair lift up. The drone groaned, holding their head in their hands. N blinked and waited for the drone to stand up. They struggled a little bit but eventually rose to their feet. 

N knew immediately who it was. He wanted to run up to her and hug her, to show that he was alright. However, he didn’t want to scare her. Sure, standing menacingly behind her wasn’t much better but oh well!

Uzi turned around and jumped, her eyes being replaced with a purple X that complimented N’s yellow one. He could tell she was looking over him, making sure her eyes weren’t deceiving her.

Without warning, Uzi slammed him into a hug. N hugged her back instantly and buried his face in her hair. Oh how he missed this. He felt Uzi’s hands grip onto his suit. 

They stayed like this for a while, happy to be together again. However, the moment had to come to an end eventually, it ending with Uzi pulling away from the hug and tilting her head to the side. She felt N’s wings in between her fingers, slowly traveling upward towards where they had sprouted from his back. N winced under his breath and Uzi looked up at him.

She pulled her hands away and grabbed the sides of his face. N raised one of his hands up to cover hers, leaning into her hand. Uzi smiled. “Hi,” the single word swirled around in N’s head. The single word made him swoon. How much he’d missed her voice.

“Hi,” N replied, a small smile on his face.

Uzi blinked and held her head back for a second before bringing back forward. “Hang on, open your mouth.”

N felt like raising a nonexistent eyebrow but obliged, opening his mouth just wide enough to see his teeth. Uzi seemed incredibly fascinated and gasped. “YOU HAVE FANGS!?” she shouted, making N stop in his tracks. He closed his mouth and brushed his tongue along his set of teeth. Sure enough, he had fangs.

“Well, you have them too!” N protested, pointing at her mouth.

“I do?” she asked, checking. “Holy shit!”

N chuckled. “So, how did we get here?”

Uzi shrugged. “I’m wondering the same thing. Last thing I remember is my head being blown off.”

N instantly understood what she did. “Oh Uzi…”

She grabbed his hands and interlocked their fingers. “But, we’re together again now. Somehow..”

She stepped on her tiptoes and kissed him on the lips. Oh how he had missed her sweet lips against his. Their fingers detangled from each others and Uzi raised her hands to around N’s neck while his went down to her waist. They closed the distance between each other and wanted to show the other just how much they had missed each other. 

But alas, like every moment before. It had to come to an end. The two pulled apart and simply stared at each other, similarly to how their first kiss went. That elevator. 

Uzi was the first one to break the silence, rubbing her neck. “Is it just me or am I really thirsty?”

Though he hadn’t thought about it very much, he was feeling very thirsty the whole time.

“Well, we have a whole mansion to look around,” N said, looking up at the basement door. “How does that sound?”

Uzi smirked. “I’d be most delighted.”


V blinked as she was sent back into reality. She looked around, trying to remember where she was.

“V!” J shouted at her, waving a hand in front of her. “Are you listening?”

“Uh- yea. Yea, sorry,” V said.

J groaned. “You’re not still thinking about that moron, are you?”

V blinked at her. Why would she be thinking about N right now? “No, just thinking about- stuff.”

“‘Stuff”?” J echoed, raising air quotes around the word. “Just remember, he’s taken now and that moron is most likely out-'' she cut herself off. V felt like raising an eyebrow and turned towards where she was looking.

There were N and Uzi, walking through the halls hand in hand as if they weren’t about to cause a massacre. J scoffed. “Those two make me sick,” she muttered.

The couple below them looked around and started whispering to each other, they grinned and jumped up the wall, crawling up to the ceiling.

“And there they go,” V said. “Maybe, they won’t be back.”

“We still have a mission that involves them ,” J protested. “Alas, we’re going to have to get to the gala before they do. Who knows what will happen if they’re left unattended.”

V nodded and the two crawled up the walls and onto the ceiling. 

Meanwhile, with the couple. The two peeked inside the ballroom, looking around. N grimaced when he saw Tessa. “I want her dead too, don’t worry,” Uzi said.

They slithered inside, avoiding being seen by humans. N looked around and grabbed Uzi's hand, quickly crawling up the walls. They made it up to the ceiling and watched with intent as the humans gathered around James and Louisa.

“Okay, when they’re not expecting it, we’ll swing down and kill those two. That should put everything in motion,” Uzi whispered, gesturing to the former humans. While N most likely would have disagreed at any other time, something seemingly infected his mind and murder actually sounded fun

“Okay, and what about everyone else?” N whispered right back, still watching the humans.

Uzi stared at him, a small smirk on her face. She pressed a quick peck on his lips before going back to watching the humans.

James raised a glass and tapped it with his fork. “Welcome all, we are deeply sorry for the lack of staff. We are currently trying to get them up and running again. In the meantime, I’d like to congratulate ourselves in-”

Uzi lifted up three fingers, slowly going down. Finally when she got to one, a large grin spread across the two’s faces and they pounced, N going for James while Uzi went for Louisa. He slammed the heel of his shoe into the back of James’ head, sending him forward and into the ground. James’ skull cracked underneath and N quickly aimed for his neck next. Biting down on it and decapitating him with ease and throwing his head into the sea of humans. Uzi quickly finished shortly after him, wiping blood off her face.

The two bowed, showing their gratitude for allowing them to let the chaos begin. While the two were doing so, Cyn teleported in behind them and spun herself around to face the crowd. “Good job, Big Brother and Sister,” she said, placing her hands on her knees and tilting her head to the side. 

When the two rose from their bow, and walked up to Cyn. They lifted a hand up. Cyn gladly grabbed their hands and allowed them to assist her descent. Once she was successfully on the ground, N and Uzi retracted their hands, putting them behind their backs. “Now then,” Cyn said as she raised a hand and made it into a fist. The room went dark, only being illuminated by the bright yellow X’s from the drones and Uzi’s purple one. 

Suddenly, the ballroom exploded in a bright yellow light, causing the humans to cover their eyes with the back of their hands. While they did this, Cyn quickly transformed into the Solver’s true form. She reached behind her and grabbed the globe, N and Uzi flew up into the air to avoid being hit. 

Let the massacre begin,” the Solver said, ordering every drone in the mansion to attack.


Tessa quickly ran into her room and locked her door behind her. She panted and slid down her door, the sounds of the humans’ screams echoing through every nook and cranny. Why is this happening? She thought. Her poor mother and father. Why were the drones doing this? Her father’s cold dead eyes staring at her burned in her mind. 

Was this payback for everything the humans had done to them? How cruelly they were treated? 

Her window suddenly shattered and she gasped, covering her mouth to cover it up. Tears trickled down her face and her eyes shook. Two drones slithered their ways in and rose to their feet.

“Hi, Tessa,” N said in the most monotone voice she’d ever heard. Uzi crawled her way around Tessa’s room, seemingly looking for something. “You can stop looking at me like that, I’m not allowed to kill you.”

Tessa raised an eyebrow and blinked at him. She lowered her hands from her mouth but stayed on the ground. “H-How are you alive? I thought you died,” she said.

“Well, there’s this funny little thing called ‘Not being human’,” Uzi smirked while she was crawling through Tessa’s closet. “You should try it sometime.”

N smiled at his girlfriend's comment. “But, we’re here to tell you that when this massacre is all done, you need to leave.”

Tessa looked over N, trying to see if he was being serious or not. “Why?”

“Cyn- the Absolute Solver is planning something big and as much as I don’t like you at the moment, I don’t want you getting hurt,” N explained.

“But, after everything I've done to you. Shouldn't you just kill me?” Tessa asked.

N shook his head, shuffling away from Tessa when she stood. “The Absolute Solver has something planned for you, I don't know what it is but what I do know is-”

Uzi slithered up the wall and whispered something to N. He nodded and Uzi flew out Tessa's broken window. N stared at Tessa, the large X on his visor staying completely still as he stared. Tessa could almost hear faint whispers surrounding him as they continued to stare. Until finally, N sighed softly and flew off behind his girlfriend.

Leaving Tessa curled up on her bedroom floor.

What have I done?


V landed in the ballroom where everyone was waiting for her. She wiped her mouth with the back of her eldritch hand. “Excellent work,” the Absolute Solver said. “I didn’t expect you to finish the massacre in such a timely fashion.”

J folded her arms. “It sounds like there’s gonna be a but at the end of that sentence, boss,” she stated.

“And there is,” the Solver said, wrapping one of its tentacles around N, V, and J’s legs and lifting them into the air, leaving Uzi on the ground. “But, you three are important to my plan. And unfortunately, that means our universe’s Romeo and Juliet will have to be separated again .”

The Solver pulled the tentacle holding N close to one of its eyes. “Of course, you should be used to this feeling by now.”

Memories started replaying in N’s mind, all the times he and Cyn had sat in the library reading that play. The X on his visor started to glitch. It was all a game to this entity. Puppeteering every person he loves and torturing him until he breaks. That was its plan. And he’d live through living hell just for this thing to get entertainment. 

“Sigh,” the Solver continued, swinging N around like a ragdoll. “Poor, N. Heart too big for his body. Maybe we can fix that ,” it raised one of its claws up. N stared at it, knowing exactly what was about to happen and closed his eyes. It stabbed its claw into N’s chest, scooping his core out of his body and allowing it to fall to the ground. Oil dripped out of N’s mouth, falling and creating a small puddle on the ground below.

The whole ballroom fell silent, the only audible sound being every joint in N’s body loosening. The Solver threw N’s corpse against the wall, more oil splattering onto the wall.

The X on Uzi’s visor shook, wanting to look at three things at once. Rage welled up inside her. However, her time with that rage was cut short. Due to one of the Solvers tentacles piercing through her visor and curling around her head. The words FATAL ERROR appeared on her visor and she was thrown against the same wall.

The Solver threw V and J in the air, making them spin around in every which way, then caught them with its claw. The two already knew what was coming for them. They weren’t going to make it out of this. No one was.

“Don’t worry,” the Solver said. “I’ll make your deaths quick and painless,” it moved its claw slowly up their bodies, resting just where their cores were. Before it gripped and split them in half, their lower halves fell onto the ballroom floor.

“Now, the real fun begins,” the Solver stated, if it could smile. It would’ve grinned.