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Trevor had been waiting for weeks. Patiently at first, but as the ‘super big important date’ rolled ever closer, he started to get a tad restless. Not Isaacs wedding, Trevor doesn’t really care about that at all (but don’t tell Isaac), he cares about one thing, and on thing only. The bachelor party baby!!!!!
Trevor hasn’t gotten to plan a bachelor party in over 30 years, and he was itching to throw an epic ragger. These people certainly needed it.
If there were ever a man that needed to loosen up, it was Isaac. The man is stiffer than a stick, in all the wrong places. Nigel would thank him later.
“Ok man,” Trevor announces as he walks into the living room, “Your problems have been solved, T-Money is here to plan your bachelor party.”
“Ooo classic boys night,” Pete says happily.
“You say it so childishly,” Isaac comments looking at Trevor in a way that seem really condescending, but Isaac is always kind of condescending…
“I’m a total Jeffery Epstein at planning bachelor parties,” Trevor says, “I’ll get it done.”
“I don’t know who that is but huzzah, you are hired,” Isaac says leaping from his seat, “Now about the ‘theme’, I would like the poetry of the Iliad to be a core thematic component of…”
“I got this man,” Trevor says, he knows how to throw a good party, and he knows Isaac, “I know what you like.”
“This event will be lit,” Isaac says, and Trevor couldn’t be more proud of his bro, “rature themed, literature must be included.”
Pete claps besides them, “I wonder what shenanigans we will all get into!”
Trevor had been working long and hard planning a rocking bachelor party for Isaac to get long and hard. Being a ghost did make the process a bit more difficult, but Trevor was happy to work through it for a bro. After all, you only live once… or be a ghost once… or get married once… Even if it happened more than once, it was still important, but Trevor was just one man, one ghost man, so he needed a bit of assistance, so he recruited his fellow ghosts.
Thor had gone to kidnap Isaac from Petes lecture about a successful marriage (however successful that lecture would be). Pete, obviously had no idea what was going on, although, now that Trevor thinks about it, Thor might also not know what was going on either.
Nancy, in the meantime, would be getting rid of Nigel to the shed. You might be asking what Sass was doing, but Trevor wasn’t going to fall for Sass’s ploys… again. Man is addicted to drama and Trevor was going to make sure that Isaacs special night was really special.
So, he had left the most important work for himself. He went over to the door and pushes the deadlock open.
“Let urself in, Im in kitchen, I’ll pretend not 2 no what going on and call 4 my wife” Trevor texts on the kitchen ipad as soon as Jay looks away to check on his steamed buns.
Trevor hasn’t told Sam or Jay what he planned (they would NEVER let him do this), and sure, Trevor might be introuble, but this was for Isaac.
Trevor hears a car roll up. It is showtime. Trevor quickly flicks the light switch to the upstairs landing, a subtle sign to Thor to get Isaac. Thor flicks the switch back. Now they are in business.
Trevor pokes his head out the window to check out the merchandise. The man outside picks up his phone, presumably to check the message that Trevor sent.
The man rolls his eyes, “It’s a good thing they paid up front,” he mutters as he opens the door.
“THIS IS MOST UNCALLED FOR THOR!” Trevor can hear Isaac yell as the Viking walks down the stairs, the groom flung over his shoulder, “I refuse to allow this brutish behaviour! Unhand me this instance.”
“Ok,” Thor says shrugging and dropping Isaac on the floor of the kitchen.
“Well that was completely unnecessary,” Isaac says as he stands up and brushes the invisible dirt off his uniform.
Behind Isaac, Jay looks confused at the un-familiar man who has walked into the kitchen.
“Hi, welcome to Woodstone B&B, we usually don’t take walk-in guests but we actually did just have a cancelation,” Jay says diplomatically, trying to guide the would-be-guest to the front desk.
The man puts down his brief-case, which opens dramatically into a light show, and started playing classical Greek dimotiki music.
“Someone called the great warrior Achiles to attention,” the man ‘Achiles’ says, as he rips his coat of to reveal an ancient Greek military garb, including a faux sword that had magically appeared out of ‘nowhere’, “to assist with a soldiers last hurrah before embarking on the most dangerous battle, marriage.”
“Trevor,” Isaac says suspiciously as he look the man up and down, “what exactly is this?”
“Saaaaaam,” Jay yells loudly.
“I heard someone is getting married to Helen of Troy tomorrow, but might want a night with Achiles,” ‘Achiles’ says as trust his hips in Jays direction, the skirt of his outfit swishing back and forth.
“Oh…” Isaac utters completely entranced, as his head follows the thrusting of the sexy warriors hips.
Yeah. He knows what his bro likes.
Bachelor parties are a strictly no chicks allowed kind of party (well no girls except for the entertainment.) and just like all great bachelor parties, Trevor needed to hire security.
“Come on Trevor,” Alberta says from the stairs where she and Hetty are trying to make it past his security guard Thor, “We want to see the stripper.”
“No girls allowed.” Trevor clarifies.
“I’ll make it worth your while,” Hetty says, batting her eyelids and twisting her tongue in motion that feels really great on his… No, you have to stay strong bro. This is Isaacs party, and his boy needs space to properly enjoy his party.
“No girls, this man for man eyes only,” Thor says.
“Nancy is there,” Alberta points out looking at Nancy who is pretending to grind up to the stripper.
“Hi there,” Nancy says, before returning to her dancing.
“Nancy isn’t a woman? Is it?” Hetty seem genuinely perplexed. Maybe Trevor should have a chat to her later, “Nevermind, Samantha is able to take part in the activities, Trevor please, do not deny me the chance to celebrate the wedding of my very dearest friend.”
Trevor can feel his resolve slipping to Hettys sweet words. No! He MUST remain strong for Isaac!
“Isaac!!!” Alberta yells, catching the grooms attention, “If you don’t let me see that sexy stripper, I will not let you see one moment of peace on your wedding night, you try gettin’ get some lovin when I wail about tossing people of bridges.”
Isaacs eyes widen in horror, “Let them join the festivities then.”
Trevor shrugs, “Whatever you like bro.”
This bachelor party was off the HOOK! Alberta, Hetty and Nancy were a power trio, grinding up against that hot man like there was no tomorrow. It’s a huge shame that ghosts can’t snort cocaine off a strippers abs because these three would do it! No shame!
Isaac seemed to be very amused by their antics, though choosing to watch from afar with Sam and Jay rather than partake in the dancing. But Trevor could tell he was having a good time even if there was a table blocking the evidence.
If Isaac likes this, he is going to love the oiling.
“Oh my god!”
Oh no… it’s a bachelor parties worst nightmare… the future spouse.
“Nigel!” Isaac says standing up from his seat, and then immediately sitting back down again.
“What on earth is all this?” Nigel asks, more confused than anything. Wasn’t it obvious. The best bachelor party ever.
“Dude, you aren’t meant to be here,” Trevor points out.
“I know this is your stag night Isaac…” Nigel says, ignoring the stripper oiling his abs and heading straight for Isaac, “but I missed you.”
“Awwwww,” Sam exclaims, holding a hand over her heart.
“Well I’ve never gotten that reaction to my freshly oiled abs,” ‘Achiles’ replies, “but hey whatever you like girl.”
Trevor laughs at Sams embarrassed face. She really was quite adorable.
“Who is this man Isaac?” Nigel asks his fiancé.
“He is a man employed by Trevor to dance seductively,” Isaac replies. Trust Isaac to over-complicate the concept of a stripper.
“Why does he look like a more muscular version of Jay, but with a British accent?” Nigel asks, tilting his head to take in the view of the mans oiled naked chest.
“Because I know what Isaac likes,” Trevor says, slapping Isaac on the back, “now that you are here you might as well enjoy it, he hasn’t gotten to the really good part yet.”
“Woooo!! I love me a thick one,” Alberta hollers as ‘Achilies’ drops the skirt off the solider costume, leaving this man bare, save for a sword.
The man was packing. Daymn, if Trevor swung that way.
“You don’t think Jay has…” Pete says, gesturing to the strippers sword.
“He does,” Hetty comments flatly.
Trevor glances over at Sam, who is burning daggers into the back of Hettys head.
“What is that thing on his…” Hetty says, forming a circle with her hands.
“Uh that,” Nancy says winking, “helps a man put his full foot forward.”
“Well, he guaranteed a large sword,” Trevor says. The man had been very clear about his endowment on the add, and he was delivering.
After all, he knows what Isaac likes.
The evening was a huge success, if most of the ladies (and Pete) falling asleep on the floor was any indication! Best part of being a ghost, he didn’t have to clean up the confetti on the floor, he could relax and take in the vibes.
On the other side of the room Nigel and Isaac were whispering to each other. Now Trevor knows the party was fun, but he wasn't going to miss out on eavesdropping on all the praise the couple were giving his handy work.
“Wow… he was rather lovely,” Nigel whispers to Isaac.
“Yes, Trevor did choose a rather attractive man,” Isaac says. And yeah, Trevor knows what Isaac likes.
“You know that I…I don’t look anything like this lovely gentleman,” Nigel says softly, “My... well everything really, is a great deal… smaller.”
“I quite like how petite you are,” Isaac says, “I too look nothing like this attractive man, everything is a great deal larger.”
“Everything?”
Isaac hums and nods his head, smiling sheepishly.
Nigel gasps, his eyes blowing wide in shock and awe. “Did you perhaps want to break tradition and uh… see each other before the wedding?”
Isaac nods his head very quickly, and bites his lower lip, reaching out to take Nigels hand as the two stand up and start walking towards their room.
T-MONEY! Trevor gestures as the two walk away. Nigel smiles at him, clearly in appreciation for a job well done. Best bachelor party ever! He knew Nigel would thank him.
After all, he knows what Isaac likes.