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It was a bright afternoon, Currant Cream was spending time with her friends, Chocolate Bon Bon and Sour Belt, at a small local cafe in the middle of the city. It was a pretty peaceful event despite Sour Belt and Chocolate Bon Bon having a disagreement on some mindless topic that didn't interest her. Currant Cream was scrolling on her phone, checking on email, or seeing how her friends are on social media.
She sipped on her drink as she was in a world of her own. That was when Pastel Meringue messaged her. It caught her attention wondering what exactly the cutesy rococo fashion designer wanted. Currant Cream checks her messages to see an image followed by a message that reads, “should I get it?”
The image was a picture of a moth plushie. It was pink and fluffy with pastel yellow wings. It had a price tag and it was 18 dollars. She can understand why Pastel Meringue was drawn to it, but was it worth the price? Currant Cream thought for a moment. Of course Pastel Meringue loved anything that was cute and sweet in his eyes. It makes him very happy. Then, Currant Cream replied, “Yes!”
Currant Cream couldn't help but chuckled to herself before she took another sip of her drink, “I am such a bad influence.” She said without realizing it. She couldn't wait to see his response. She giggles to herself without realizing it caught the attention of Sour Belt and Chocolate Bon Bon. They stared at her wondering what was going on through that head of hers. It took a hot second to acknowledge the two designers were staring at her.
“Hmm, I wonder what seems to be getting you so gigglish?” Chocolate Bon Bon asked teasingly. Currant Cream sat there awkwardly thinking how she should respond to the question.
“Umm… Well, I may or may not be talking to Pastel Meringue. Nothing much.” Currant Cream awkwardly responded. Despite her words sounding uncertain, there was a sense of sincerity and sweetness to it. Sour Belt gave her a confused look, “huh? Why him?”
Currant Cream knew Sour Belt and Pastel Meringue didn't get along well. They usually have arguments about each other's styles. Although it has been awhile since he has interacted with her or Bon Bon for that matter. Regardless, Currant Cream will try to plead his case, “Well, it's just friendly banter between us. Nothing much. I just enjoy talking to him from time to time.”
“Out of all the cookies you choose the picky pink bitch?” Sour Belt snarked. She was never on good terms with Pastel Meringue with him calling her style “gaudy”. Currant Cream can understand Sour Belt's resentment, but does she truly know him? Currant Cream averted her eyes away from Sour Belt and Chocolate Bon Bon, “Well sure, he is quite stubborn…”
Currant Cream looked at her phone to see a new notification from Pastel Meringue with an image attached of him getting the plushie. She smiled at his response. They have come so far after the roof incident from neighbors to good friends. She smiled “but deep down, he is a sweetheart once you get know him”
“I will believe it when I see it.” Sour Belt bluntly said. She doubts Pastel Meringue could be a sweetheart. Currant chuckled to herself, “Ha, trust me, he is and I will prove it somehow…,”
“Good luck with that.” Sour Belt said sarcastically. She doubts Pastel Meringue is anything, but stubborn. Currant Cream sighed before looking at the time. That's when she realized her shop opens in an hour. She got up from her chair.
“Sorry to leave abruptly, but I have to go to get ready before my shop opens.” Currant Cream smiled. Chocolate Bon Bon gave an acknowledging nod. Sour Belt seems suspicious of her. Currant Cream gave off one final wave before leaving with the drink in her hand.
“Hmm…” Sour Belt suspiciously hummed. She finds it odd that Currant Cream is beginning to be quite fawned of Pastel Meringue. She knows that man is way too stubborn to like someone like her. Sour Belt pondered what is going on between them, “Something is up between these two.”
“What do you mean?” Chocolate Bon Bon asked for clarification. Sour Belt gave a glare of suspicion towards Currant Cream and she walked away from their table, “Don't you think Currant Cream has gotten a little too close to Pastel Meringue?”
Chocolate Bon Bon gave a confused look, “No, well it seems like they are on better terms, but nothing else than that.”
Chocolate Bon Bon’s words come across as reasonable, however Sour Belt was not buying it. Sour Belt narrows her eyes slightly, “I doubt it. Ever since last Fashion Week, they have been suspiciously closer. Hmmm… I wondered what's going on between them?”
“Are you implying they are dating or something?” Chocolate Bon Bon jested, she didn't actually think Currant Cream was dating Pastel Meringue, but the idea of that clicked with Sour Belt like a puzzle piece. She slammed her hands against the table, “That's it!!”
Chocolate Bon Bon was taken aback by Sour Belt’s sudden outburst, “What’s it?”
“Just like you said, they might be dating! It explains why they are so close.” Sour Belt said boldly. Chocolate Bon Bon gave her a doubtful look, “but you said Pastel Meringue is too stubborn to like someone like Currant Cream.”
Sour Belt chuckled, “True, but I believe that is just a facade now. What if he secretly likes her and he just doesn't want to admit it. That explains why he is such a bitch. Not to mention how Currant Cream called him a ‘sweetheart’.”
Chocolate Bon Bon still had that doubtful gaze on her face. She wasn't convinced that Pastel Meringue would love someone as punky as Currant Cream. He is very much a guy of looks and manners, so someone as Currant Cream doesn't sit with Bon Bon’s mind. Regardless, she doesn't believe she is going to change Sour Belt's mind. Chocolate Bon Bon sigh, “I highly doubt that since Currant Cream was referring to his behavior and not anything romantic, but whatever you say I guess…”
As Currant Cream was heading how, her phone rang notifying her that she got a message. Currant Cream looked at her phone to see who messaged her. It was Pastel Meringue again, but this time, the tone from the previous conversation was shifted.
“I know this might come out of nowhere but can we talk? It's important.” The message reads. Currant Cream stopped in her tracks wondering what this was about. She texted back, “That's fine by me, but may I ask what about?”
She doesn't mind if Pastel Meringue needs to rant to her about something, but she does want some context to understand what exactly they are discussing. Once she got a reply it was clear why he was asking to talk to her.
“It's about my mother” Currant Cream stood there for a second. She knew Pastel Meringue told her his mother and him didn't have the best relationship, but never knew the full story. Currant Cream replied, “Alright. I will meet you at 10 pm.”
She thinks 10 pm would be a good time to discuss this when both of their businesses are closed for the day. Pastel Meringue seemed to also agree when he replied to her message with a simple okay. Currant Cream turns off her phone before heading back home.
It was almost 10 pm and Currant Cream was in the process of wrapping up shop for the evening. Tidying up the clothing racks, folding clothes, nothing much. She was in the middle of restocking some accessories on the shelf when the store door opened. Currant Cream didn't notice despite the room being dead silent. Her blasting loud music is a quick way for her to get deaf. She didn't pay attention until…
“Currant Cream…”
Currant Cream heard someone call her name and she turned around to see Pastel Meringue standing there. He didn't seem alright. He looked nervous and was unable to make eye contact with Currant Cream. He held his left wrist with his right hand as if it was hurt or aching from something. She approached him, “Are you ready to talk about it?”
Pastel Meringue nodded his head, unable to speak. Currant Cream closed up shop and led him to her room. Although, she wasn't expecting him to come to her room. She thought it would be the other way around, but she didn't mind. Currant Cream opens the door to her room and enters inside. Her room is mostly shades of red and black. The lighting was just red LED lights strips on the walls. Her bed was covered in a black fluffy blanket with red pillows. Currant Cream sat down on her bed and patted a spot next to her, signaling Pastel Meringue to sit next to her. He took a deep breath realizing there is no going back and sat down next to her.
“Do you want to tell me what she has done to you?” Currant Cream asks. She wanted to make sure that he was comfortable with telling her the exact details of his mother's abuse. Pastel Meringue hesitated to tell her what was going on. Sure, she is aware there is tension between him and his mother, but he questioned if Currant Cream would be the right one to tell this kind of stuff to. Although he can't go back now. Pastel Meringue sighs, “It's a lot from what I remember. I am not sure if you want to sit here listening to me ramble about how much of a cruel person my mom is.”
Currant Cream reached for his hand before cupping them in-between her hands, “I don't mind how long it takes to tell me. I just want to know what you've been through and see if I can help you get through it.”
Pastel Meringue sighed, “Alright. Where do I begin?” There were just so many things his mom has done to him. It was hard to pick one. Currant Cream sees that he struggles with thoughts, so she provides a bit of aid, “Tell me what your mom was like? Give me a list of words you would describe her.”
Pastel Meringue paused for a second before giving an answer, “She was cruel and controlling. She would punish me if I don't live up to her standards.”
Currant Cream is starting to get the idea that his mom was toxic. What did she do to him? She got a bit more curious about his past.
“Tell me more about how she was cruel and controlling. I want to understand what she put you through.” Currant Cream asks. Pastel Meringue looked back on the memories of his mother, “well… she would constantly criticize everything I did. She controlled every aspect of my life, my actions, thoughts, body, diet, hobbies, any she can control she will get a hold of it. I was never allowed to have any thoughts of my own. I let her do whatever with me because I didn't want to get punished”
“Oh that's not good,” Currant Cream said in a worried tone. His mother practically put him on a damn leash and forced them into obeying to avoid punishment. Wait… Punishment? Currant Cream was concerned for Pastel Meringue. What kind of punishment did she put him through? Seeing how controlling his mother is it could be vile.
“You mentioned that she punishes you. What did she do to you as punishment?” Currant Cream asks. Pastel Meringue looked at her his eyes devoid of any light. He gave a weak chuckle. A weak somber chuckled, “She would punish me if I do anything wrong, even if it was the littlest thing I could do. She would emotionally manipulate me, guilt-trip me, and…”
Pastel Meringue held his left wrist unable to finish his sentence. Currant Cream noticed how he was always clutching his wrist since he came to her shop. She finds it odd unless… Currant Cream took his left hand. She looks at it for a second. There was nothing odd about it, but there could be something underneath his sleeve. She pinched the rim of his sleeve before looking at him in the eye, “May I?”
She wanted to be sure that she had his full permission before anything. Pastel Meringue hesitated. It felt like time stopped. He was too afraid to give her an answer.
Then he recalled his mother's words, “if you feel your gut telling you not to like something then you listen to it. Never give it a chance. It's your body's instinct.” Those words are what shaped him to the cookie he is today, even if it was hypocritical of his mother. Pastel Meringue was scared to show Currant Cream, but she made him feel such warm and comforting emotions in the past when he was at his most vulnerable. He gave her a chance, he was given love and care and he felt safe until his mother would harm him verbally… and physically.
He gave her a nod giving her his full permission. He decides to put his faith in Currant Cream hoping she won't hurt him. She can tell he was scared, so she will make sure she is gentle. She pulled up his sleeves and was horrified to see scars. There were a lot of them painted across this wrist. The scars look faded as if it has been there for quite some time.
Pastel Meringue looked away in shame feeling like he made the wrong decision, however was surprised when he felt Currant Cream run her fingers over his scar. She was being gentle on his wrist. Pastel Meringue was confused about what she was doing.
“I am assuming your mom did this to you.” Currant Cream said. Pastel Meringue sighed, “Yeah, She would usually hit me with her cane until I bleed. The end of the cane had barb spikes and it hurt so much…”
A cane with barb spikes on it. Currant Cream took a second to picture that in her head, but snapped back to reality when Pastel Meringue spoke, “my wrist is not the only place where she left scars.”
Pastel Meringue pulled the collar of the blouse he always wears and revealed there are more scars on the part where the body and neck connect. They were also faded. Currant Cream never knew he had them. It would have been so obvious to be seen if Pastel Meringue never covered them. She is a bit surprised that they were there and not anywhere else on his body.
“I can't manage what it felt like.” Currant Cream calmly said, “It says a lot about who cruel your mother. Your scars… They tell a story. A story of suffering and how you overcome it.”
Pastel Meringue was surprised to see Currant Cream so understanding. He looked a bit relieved, but still unsure. Currant Cream pulled up his sleeves to cover the scars back up. Pastel Meringue couldn't help but feel a wave of safety. Those scars were painful reminders of his mother's abuse, but Currant Cream changed his perspective a bit. They way she says it made it sound like his scars are a symbol of strength. He survived through the abuse and is now away from his mother.
Then Currant Cream remembers something. Back when she heard Pastel Meringue sobbing late at night Pastel Meringue shouted some words at her to discourage her from speaking to him. There was something about that made her wonder.
“Pastel Meringue. May I ask you something?” Currant Cream remembers him saying something about never wanting to open up to anyone again. She wonders what exactly happened that causes him to have such trust issues. Pastel Meringue looks up at her, “You may.”
“I remembered you saying something about never wanting to open up to anyone again. May I ask, is there a reason why you are so hesitant to open up?”
Pastel Meringue looked away. He recalled the memory that exactly answers her question. It was a painful one. He still remembers how that event made him so distant with everyone. "I trusted someone and they ratted me out to my mother. Back home, I remember telling one of the maids about my mother how I feel. Little did I know the maids were always told to report me if I ever do anything wrong and well… let's just say my mother gave me a few new scars .”
Currant Cream sympathizes with how this betrayal affected Pastel Meringue. He put his trust in someone thinking he will be okay, but was left with more scars on his body. She too experienced something like that. Currant Cream gave him a concerned look. Even the maids were in on this. How can anyone think it's a good idea to ignore his abuse? “I can't even begin to imagine how much suffering you've been through. You were all alone during that time and everyone was against you. That must have felt so awful. I can't believe no one stood up for you.”
“Well I am not surprised seeing how powerful my mother is. For fucksake she rules an entire kingdom.” Pastel Meringue blurred out. That last bit caught Currant Cream off guard. Rules a kingdom?! Is she royalty or something? But if she is royalty doesn't that make Pastel Meringue royal as well. She was quite surprised that he never mentioned anything about it. Although to be fair he did see his home in a negative way so she can kind of understand why he never brought it up. It took her a second to process it.
“No wonder she was allowed to do that to you,” Currant Cream sighed, “she truly is a vile person. I just can't believe she put you through and you kept silent about it for so long. I can't imagine what you're feeling right now. It must really hurt.”
“It really is… Eventually, I had enough. Of her and everyone else. That's when I decided I was going to run away. It was a hard process, but with a lot of planning, I was able to steal some money from my mother and bolted out of there. Then I took the bus to get out of the kingdom and into the city. I thought it would have been a safer place.” He was young when he ran away, yet so brave to do so. Currant Cream held his hands, she was just glad he doesn't have to deal with his mother anymore.
“Living with my mother was the worst part of my life. Even though I'm in a much better place now, but I-” Pastel Meringue felt his throat swell up a bit, his eyes started to tear up, “I just- I just feel like shit.”
“No matter what I do, it will never be good enough for her.” Pastel Meringue’s voice started to get shaky. Slowly he was having a breakdown. All these memories of his mother’s were burning him like hot boiling water on his dough.
“She would always hurt me! She would make me feel so scared and sad and I- I…” Pastel Meringue felt his blood start to boil. A burning emotion of resentment grew. He couldn't hold back anymore. His hatred for his mother reached its point.
“I HATE HER!!” Pastel Meringue shouted with all his rage. Currant Cream didn't seem bothered by his sudden outburst. Not even a flinch. Tears were pouring down his face. Pastel Meringue was violently sobbing and shaking with intense hatred for his mother. Currant Cream understands where his anger comes from, justifiably.
“You have every right to hate her. She has done some truly horrific things to you. No one deserves to go through that.” Currant Cream patted his shoulders to comfort him. Pastel Meringue looks at her to see a warm smile across her face. More tears pour down his face, “I HATE HER SO MUCH!! I FEEL LIKE I COULD NEVER BE NORMAL!! I JUST FEEL AWFUL!”
Pastel Meringue sees how Currant Cream was so attentive towards him. She was listening to every word that came out of his mouth. He felt heard. He felt warm, just by being by her side. He never felt this safe before in his life. Her kindness was like a light on a candle. Warm when close. He buried his face in her chest. Currant Cream wraps her arms around him. She didn't mind at all, she wanted him to feel safe. The poor man has been through a lot and she wants to provide him comfort.
"Do you feel better after talking about it, Pastel Meringue?" Currant Cream asks. Pastel Meringue looks up at her before nodding in response, “To be honest, yes. I do not know why, but I feel less tension in my body. I don't know how to explain it…”
Currant Cream smiled before pulling him into a hug. Pastel Meringue hugged her back, he blush a deep shade of red as a wave of warmth hit him. Out of all the cookies, it was her that was comforting him.
"You are so sweet, Currant…" Pastel Meringue mumbled under his breath. Despite Currant Cream having hearing issues from deafening herself with loud music, she hears his words clearly. Her cheek tinted a light red, a bit flatter especially when she knows how sweet he likes sweetness. Nonetheless, she embraced him.
"It's the least I can do." She smiles before hugging him. Currant Cream looks at him and sees how much pain he has been hiding away. Her eyes narrowed in rage at what his mother had done to him. She was disgusted by her and will never let him suffer again, “no matter what happens, I will never let your mother hurt you ever again. I promise.”
Pastel Meringue shifted his gaze up at her with tears in his eyes, “you mean it?”
Currant Cream tightened her grasp, “I truly mean it.” She looked down to see him with tears his blue eyes. She sighed, before wiping his tears away with her thumb. He looks so fragile she thought to herself. A beautiful glass vase that has been under tons of pressure and is cracked. Now, she is repairing it with the care he was never given. Pastel Meringue rested his head against her chest once his tears were clean, but they continued to pour. Currant Cream didn't mind. She just wanted to let out all his bottled emotions.
There was only silence in the air. It was just Pastel Meringue clinging on to Currant Cream with occasional sobbing. He was desperately trying to calm himself, but at least he felt safe with Currant Cream. Despite her scary appearance, she has this aura of safety to her that Pastel Meringue could not explain. He felt safe, something his mother never provided. He liked this feeling of safety and he craved more of it. This feeling is something he wants to keep. His grasp got tighter around Currant Cream. He didn't want to let go of her. She felt his hands holding on to her. It caught her attention and she averted her gaze at him.
“Don't let go.” Pastel Meringue sobbed. Currant Cream was surprised by what he said. She never expected him to say something like that, but she wasn't against it. She pulled Pastel Meringue closer to her as much as she could. She wanted to provide anything that comforts him. She was partially hugging him.
“I promise I won't until you feel better.” Currant Cream whispered to him in a soothing voice. Pastel Meringue felt reassured and safe. He closed his eyes fully trusting the cookie he once hated. Slowly, Pastel Meringue calmed down, but still held on to Currant Cream. It was midnight at this point, and past Pastel Meringue’s sleep schedule. Not Currant Cream, she was used to having a fucked up sleep schedule due to staying up working on projects. It was a peaceful moment between the two of them.
Currant Cream looked over at Pastel Meringue to see how he was doing. She sees his eyes closed. She whispered his name to get his attention but no response. Currant Cream chuckled lightly and thought to herself, “looks like he is asleep.”
Currant Cream could carry him back to his room or let her sleep in her bed while she is out doing other things. No… She made a promise. She will keep that promise. Currant Cream carefully repositioned herself so was under the sheets of her bed with Pastel Meringue by her side. She wraps her arms around his waist before pulling him close to her body. She will keep him in her arms. Just as he wanted.
Currant Cream let out a yawn. She was getting quite sleepy. She kept Pastel Meringue close before closing her eyes as a warm feeling washes over her heart.
Morning arises and despite being bright and early the room was still dark other than the faint LED red lights dimming the room. There were no windows so no sunlight shone through. Pastel Meringue was wrapped all nice and cozy in Currant Cream's arms with a soft fluffy blanket covering them both.
His eyes open slowly taking in the red light, before realizing who was sleeping in front of him. Pastel Meringue looks to see Currant Cream next to him. At first, he was confused on how he got here until he recalled the night before. He was so vulnerable and Currant Cream did nothing, but comfort him. He felt more at ease when remembering the situation. There was a faint smile on his face feeling happy that someone showed such care. No to mention how she really did keep her promise.
Out of all cookies is the one who is providing such love and affection it was her. It felt euphoric. He couldn't help himself and he scooted closer to her wanting to feel more of this fuzzy feeling in his gut. However, he didn't account for Currant Cream to wake up by his movement.
“Pastel Meringue?” Currant Cream mumbled as she slowly woke up. She looked with droopy eyes, still a little tired. Pastel Meringue started to feel a bit flustered.
“How are you doing?” Currant Cream asks sweetly. Pastel Meringue couldn't muster up a word. He wanted to speak his mind, but felt embarrassed to say a thing. Never once was he in an awkward situation like this. There were a lot of things Pastel Meringue hadn't experienced yet… Currant Cream could tell he was a little embarrassed. Understandably. She decided to aid him a bit.
“Are you feeling better?” Currant Cream asked a simple yes or no question. Pastel Meringue simply nodded his head. He doesn't feel the gravity of his emotions as badly from the night before. It felt nice to get it off his chest. Currant Cream smiled, “I am glad you are feeling better.”
With that Currant Cream released her grasp against him. Pastel Meringue couldn't help but feel a bit of sadness brushed up against him. He felt more safe when Currant Cream held him. Currant Cream noticed the shift in his expression when she let go of him.
“You like my hugs?” Currant Cream was astonished by the idea of Pastel Meringue liking her physical interactions.
“Yes… They make me feel safe…” Pastel Meringue admitted while trying to maintain his composure. He felt so open and vulnerable when saying that. He didn't want to be betrayed again, but he had faith in Currant Cream.
Currant Cream felt happy knowing the cookie who was so closed off before is warming up to her, “I am so glad you feel safe. It must feel nice, doesn't it?”
“It really does. I never felt this safe ever and I want to feel more of it.” Pastel Meringue mumbled. He felt embarrassed about admitting this to her. He sighed before looking away trying to process his thoughts and emotions. This felt sudden to him. Currant Cream notices how he is lost in thoughts. She wonders what is going through his head.
Pastel Meringue looked down at the bed uncertain what to think. He was in a world of his own with thoughts and emotions flooding it. That was until Currant Cream rested her head against his shoulder. It snapped Pastel Meringue out of his thoughts and he looked over at Currant Cream.
“You looked unsure of something when you talked about how safe you felt around me. Why is that?” she asked him. Pastel Meringue was a bit shaken by the question, and ponder if he should be honest or not talk about it. He has gotten this far, yet fear of that incident circled his head.
“I feel like I shouldn't be talking about these thoughts and emotions. It feels…” Pastel Meringue sighed, “It feels like I need to hide them at times and I worry someone will use them to hurt me. I know last night I told you what I have been through, but it feels off. I guess I am just not used to talking about this kind of stuff.”
“Is that why it took you until now to talk about them?” Currant Cream asked. Pastel Meringue nodded his head in response. Currant Cream started to theorize what could have caused it. Was it his mother who pressured him to live up to her toxic standards, the betrayal, or was it from personal experience that evoking such strong emotions felt wrong? Whatever it was, it made the idea of expressing them felt foreign to him. Currant Cream lifted her head up and shifted her body to face him.
“Pastel Meringue, I want you to know this. You don't need to hide them. It's okay to show and express your emotions. That's what makes you true. You got that?” Currant Cream smiled. Pastel Meringue listens to what she says before nodding his head.
“I want to reassure you that you can come to me if you need to talk to someone. I promise whatever happens between us privately will only be between us and I will never use your emotions against you.” Currant Cream smiled in a comforting way then her tone changed to something a bit more silly, “and remember, your mom is a bitch and you don't need to cling to her words.”
Pastel Meringue looked into her red eyes before smiling. There was that feeling of safety again. He felt like her words were genuine and he could truly trust her. Without thinking, Pastel Meringue hugged her. Currant Cream was pleasantly surprised by that and hugged him back.
He felt safe in her arms and now found trust in someone who looks scary has the sweetest heart anyone could ever have. After all, he loves anything that is sweet.