Archive of Our Own

Seonghwa woke up from shivering like he had a slight fever. Still drowsy and a little confused, he opened one eye, embracing the early morning sun, hand searching around for comfort - his mate. But Hongjoong’s place next to him was empty. Cold even. Just like the thin layer of sweat covering the omega’s body. Seonghwa slowly felt a crushing and powerful wave of awareness overtake him as he realized that his nest had been destroyed. He was lying in a mess of blankets, clothes, and pillows. Without any order, without a structure - a chaos.

The relational part of the omega knew - he must have kicked his always-perfect nest while sleeping. Especially since, without Hongjoong by his side, Seonghwa could never sleep at ease. And his mate knew that, yet he wasn’t here. He hasn’t come back.

“Hongjoong?” Seonghwa called, trying to push himself up with still shaky hands. Something was wrong with him, and he still couldn’t understand what. But the fact that he woke up yet another morning like this hurt more than any other day.

He slid off the bed, trying to smell his alpha’s sandalwood scent, but couldn’t. Not anymore. He reached for the bathrobe on the chair and walked out through the door, rough breaths pressuring his lungs so much he could feel a sharp pain. Seonghwa tried not to jump to fast conclusions. He tried to stay positive. But how? How much longer?

“Hongjoong?” He called again, walking into the alpha’s home studio, just to find all the equipment shut down. Seonghwa could see his reflection in the dark screens - his pathetic crumbled posture, his dark shoulder-length hair falling on his forehead. The omega released a tiny but painful sound as he stepped closer to the chair, where Hongjoong would sit for hours creating music. Leaning slightly against the leather surface, his eyes focused on a sheet of paper on the desk.

Words scribbled in Hongjoong’s chaotic handwriting.

You don’t know how hard it was

To realize we have nothing left to share

You were such a big part of my life

But now I have moved on

The alpha's notebook covered the rest of those heartbreaking words, and Seonghwa didn't dare to touch it. One part of him wanted to know the end of it. Lyrics? Letter? He didn’t know. But Seonghwa didn’t dare to move anything without Hongjoong’s consent. Even if he had left such a mess after him. But it reminded Seonghwa of his past presence - crumbs that were needed so much.

He left the studio while taking out his phone from the bathrobe’s pocket. No missed calls. No messages. Even their group chat was quiet. He barely needed to charge his phone these days - there was no need since Seonghwa almost didn’t use it. After finishing his recent project for work, he had no schedule. A few weeks ago, taking some break between work sounded like a good idea. Now he wasn’t sure. 

Seonghwa unlocked the screen as he entered the kitchen and somehow fell into the chair without falling. His wallpaper where his mate was wholeheartedly smiling didn’t help either, but as Seonghwa pressed the call button, he still had hope. Which was soon ruined, because the call got redirected to a voice message.

“Hi!” The omega’s mate cheerfully greeted him. “I’m either busy with work or living my best dream with the love of my life! Yes, Seonghwa, it’s you! Leave a message,” He laughed. “...and I’ll contact you later. If my mate allows it.” Hongjoong chuckled again and then the beep followed.

Seonghwa hung up and then pressed the call button again. Just to listen to the same message. Just to let Hongjoong’s voice sink into him, the intonation, his laughter, every little breath he took between words, the meaning behind them. When the message had ended, Seonghwa called again. And again. And again. He had called Hongjoong hundreds of times. He knew this message word by word, breath by breath, and it was never enough.

Seonghwa had always managed to calm himself down, but today was just different. No matter what he tried to think about related to Hongjoong, it seemed so distant, so… cold. And Seonghwa himself was freezing. He felt scared. Lonely. He reached for another number on his list - it was San. Maybe if he heard any kind of friendly voice, that would help. San was always so caring for him at work.

“Hyung?” He answered after a few seconds of wait, but somehow a little too quiet.

“Sannie… Hi! How are you?” Seonghwa somehow found the strength to steady his voice and let out a breath.

“Um… good? Hyung, it’s like eight in the morning… Can we talk later? I have a busy schedule today…” San answered in a lower tone, more like himself, but still not the same as usual.

“Oh! Right… I’m so sorry, I didn’t realize it was so early!! No need. I am alright. Good luck!!” Seonghwa hung up after that, terrified by him acting so pathetic. Disturbing his friends without consideration. What a loser. 

Seonghwa forced himself to get up and brew a coffee, hoping it would kick some senses into him. But he kept checking the time on his screen and one uncertain move caused him to drop the Moka pot on the floor. The metal coffee maker loudly crashed on the white tiles, splashing the hot liquid around, even the legs of his kitchen table and drawer. Seonghwa was just in time to jump back himself so the burning coffee wouldn’t get on his naked feet.

“No… no no… no no…” The omega leaned in from an invisible punch right into his guts, something he could never allow - the mess in his kitchen. Seonghwa fell on his knees with the kitchen towel, pressing it against the hot puddle, and burning his fingers in the process. There wasn’t supposed to be any dirt.

How could he fail at something so simple as making coffee? Seonghwa kept shaking his head as hands fixed the damage, but the towel was dripping wet, and the coffee had already soaked into the wooden surface of his table. The omega released a distressed sound. Unable to think rationally, Seonghwa crawled away from the spot. In denial, again with the phone in his hand.

Please. Someone. Anyone. Seonghwa tried to call another number. Someone he knew would be already up or maybe haven’t gone to sleep since yesterday.

“Morning, or is it morning already?” Mingi picked up with a little chuckle.

Seonghwa wanted to sob from relief when he heard his friend answer with a lighter tone. Alright. Everything was still alright. Seonghwa and the rest of his friends worked for the same company and always shared projects. And Mingi was responsible for their schedules. Seonghwa realized he needed something to do. Work. He needed to prove to himself that he could do it. He was not useless.

“Hi… Hi, Mingi-yah. I know I just finished one enormous project… but I was wondering if you have anything else at this moment? Anything would you do!” Seonghwa had to put all his strength not to sound as desperate as he felt.

“Oh… no?” Mingi sighed. “I have nothing at the moment. I’m just wrapping up one deadline and I want to take a break with Yuyu.” He then made a pause, as if realizing he had said something too sensitive. “I mean…”

“Anything. Even if it’s something small… even if it’s nothing important. Paperwork. Anything, please.” Seonghwa practically begged, not aware that he might scare his colleague. Of course, Mingi wanted to take holidays to spend them with his mate. Seonghwa wished he could do the same. But his mate… his Hongjoong…

“Hyung… I really don’t have anything.” Mingi sounded apologetic, but not enough to calm Seonghwa’s pounding heart. “Well, there is one… but I don’t think you can manage that now… so, just rest, alright?” He suggested.

Can’t manage? Because he was not good enough for it, right? Because he wouldn’t accomplish it without failure. Was that what Mingi wanted to say? That was it.

“Hyung?” his friend called again when Seonghwa remained silent.

“I’m sorry. You… you’re right.” Seonghwa breathed out. “M-maybe we can meet?” he then pleaded in a quieter voice.

“I just pulled an all-nighter and was planning to go to sleep… plus Yuhno—” Mingi’s voice broke a bit. Whatever he wanted to say, Seonghwa's friend changed his mind. “Well, how about next time, alright? Me, you and Yunho… we could…”

‘I have… I have something to do." Seonghwa interrupted when tears started strangling him. “I have to go.” He didn’t wait for an answer before hanging up. All of them were living their lives, all of them had something to do, something to hold on to, somewhere to be. But Seonghwa didn’t. He didn’t. Because he was good for nothing.

The omega slowly got up, holding on to the drawer, his own words sharply like knives hitting the most painful spots again and again. He walked towards the living room but was met by something he had forgotten about - the pillows and blankets on the floor, some things shoved off the coffee table, dust… dust on the shelves, and photo frames turned down. Seonghwa did this. Yesterday, when he was trying to search for any remaining scent of Hongjoong and then didn’t want to see those happy memories. He had fallen asleep in his ruined nest after tiring completely out, hoping that tomorrow magically would be different. Seonghwa couldn’t even recall when the uneasy feeling started growing in his chest - he was just reading a book in the evening and then… then… something inside him started crumbling, begging for any kind of comfort he couldn’t receive.

Because he didn’t deserve it. Hongjoong hasn’t called him because Seonghwa doesn’t deserve his mate. He wasn’t needed. He couldn’t clean. He couldn’t make a proper nest. He couldn’t even work on a project. Even the omega’s friends didn’t think he was good enough. Did everyone feel the same way? Seonghwa didn’t have many fears but… he knew when he wasn’t good enough and that was the worst of all.

Seonghwa stared at the distance through the window where the morning autumn sun got slowly replaced by clouds and the first raindrop fell on the glass - like reflecting the weather. Tears ran down Seonghwa’s cheeks as well. 

The omega felt like he was hitting some invisible wall no matter in which direction he turned. Like the ground was moving, like the world was going, but he was just here. In one spot. Seonghwa tried to hold on so badly, as he opened a chat with his two best friends and pressed the call button. He waited. And waited, looking at the little icon of his profile picture with Hongjoong kissing his cheek, but that was all Seonghwa got. No one picked up.

Too early. Too busy. Too distant.

Maybe… maybe Seonghwa could still do something to be better? Maybe he could fix it? The omega dropped his phone on the couch and went towards the bathroom to look at himself. Whatever there was to look at - the pair of dark eyes had reflected nothing but emptiness. Seonghwa was the one who wanted to grow his hair out, but Hongjoong had never said anything specific about it. Maybe because he didn’t like it. And if Seonghwa cut it… if he does that. He would come back, right? He wouldn’t think Seonghwa wasn’t good enough then, right?

The omega reached for the scissors on the shelf and took a lock of inky strands. Then cut it off. The action itself didn’t hurt as much as seeing strands falling into the sink like ashes. Seonghwa reached another part of his hair and cut again, a little sob escaping his throat. He wanted to feel more. He should have felt more, but he cried because he couldn’t. The more dark hair fell into the sink, the more paralyzed Seonghwa became. So cold. His hands shivered, and his vision blurred so much that at some point Seonghwa didn’t know if he was still cutting hair or just the air.

Feel. Feel. FEEL.

He screeched inside. He brutally scratched like an animal trying to set itself free from the cage, but his face reflected no such feelings. Seonghwa parted his lips as scissors slipped through his fingers into the sheets of dark hair. The omega grabbed the corner of the sink and opened his mouth to scream - but no sound came out. He tried too hard to push through any kind of emotion but only felt how emptiness and worst fears consumed him faster.

Seonghwa’s knees bent, and the body moved, crawling somewhere where he could hide and disappear. When did it become so empty? Where did his feelings disappear? With these thoughts, the omega hid his face in his knees, hugged himself around the shoulders, and dug nails into his arms until it hurt. He waited for the pain to consume him - at least something - even if that was the only emotion he could get. Just anything to make sure he was still alive. But he was like a little worthless bug. His body was still in the room, but his mind was no longer there. He still had some empathy inside, but at the same time, he couldn’t care anymore. Like he was a broken item. Past repair.

Like he had failed.

Seonghwa was falling into an endless darkness. Dropping. He was underwater, at the bottom. Where there was no longer faith left. No longer feelings existed. Why could he no longer move? 

“I told you I know the passcode!!” 

“Yeah, after like the 10th time trying!”

“You’re just jealous because you don’t know it.”

“Hwa!! Seonghwa!! Where are you??”

“He couldn’t leave, his shoes are here… oh… what a mess??”

“Seonghwa!!!”

He heard them, but couldn’t really register the voices or the meaning behind their words, not until the omega had someone’s hands almost harshly gripping his chin. Like being pulled out from underwater, Seonghwa stuttered and breathed in a little air, his eyes trying to focus on moving lips that were telling something, but he couldn’t understand clearly what.

“Oh, God… oh… Seonghwa. Look at me. Look at us,” The voice urged and urged, slightly shaking his body as if struggling to wake up. “He is cold like ice… Yeo, bring blankets or something!”

“R-right!”

“Seonghwa, it’s me… it’s Wooyoung and Yeosang. We are here.” The man kneeling in front of him carefully touched Seonghwa’s cheeks and hair, letting out a little desperate sound. 

“I got it!! Some blankets from his nest… but it’s all destroyed… Wooyoung, are we too late?” 

“No, we’re not. We are not too late. Wait, let’s take him somewhere comfortable.” The voice next to Seonghwa then became a bit more distant, and the omega was almost sure he was about to be left alone. Until the darkness consumed him completely. But then the next moment, two pairs of hands began lifting him. Seonghwa was still so numb he couldn’t support his weight at all.

Seonghwa might have let out some sort of sound when his tensed muscles hurt, but it didn’t matter. He couldn’t care less where he was taken. Somewhere where he could continue to drown. Somewhere even darker.

But he felt a comfortable warmth underneath himself. Then two familiar scents surrounded him. Fresh Caramel. Apples. Like homemade baking, so sweet it could make your mouth water. It smelled like home, to be surrounded by this scent. It made Seonghwa feel. Something. A little.

“Shhh… Hwa… it’s alright. Everything will be alright.” A warm voice next to his ear cooed, and that only made Seonghwa release another broken noise. He was apparently sobbing louder and louder until it formed into tears and weeps.

“Oh Hwa… it’s me. Sangie, he is so, so cold.” The other voice spoke in great concern, and Seonghwa felt the weight falling on himself, like dozens of the softest blankets. But it wasn’t enough to bring out life.

“It must be just you. Why did you run out wearing only a T-shirt, Woo-yah?” The first one, with a comforting apple scent, answered.

“For my Hwa, I could run out with my naked ass! Facts! Right, Hwa?” a fresh caramel scent tickled Seonghwa’s neck, causing him to whimper.

It was sweet. It actually… It actually felt nice.

Through the silence that his soul emitted, Seonghwa had finally noticed some cracks. Cracks that allowed a little of the sun to come in. To listen. Worried whispers surrounded him like a fluffy cloud, but Seonghwa didn’t try to figure out their meanings - instead, he let their voices and scents melt into him, slowly pushing the coldness away. 

“Woo… Woo-yah…” Seonghwa bawled, opening his eyes after a long ice age. His friends still snuggled the same way next to him. “Sangie… you too…” he stuttered another word and received a light hug for that. “I’m sorry… I’m sorry I failed…”

“Failed? Hwa… you didn’t fail… why would you think like that? Mmmm… we omegas never fail, all the rest just simply suck.” Wooyoung gently placed his hand on Seonghwa’s hair, leading him to lean more into him. And he did, feeling a pleasant weight from another side, where Yeosang was practically lying on him.

“For once I agree with Woo-yah,” Yeosang murmured, his head on Seonghwa’s stomach, a little purr escaping his chest.

“But…” the omega furrowed his eyebrows. 

He still couldn’t get rid of the powerful fear that he had failed and that if his friends learned about it, they would leave him. Seonghwa slowly but confidently reached to grip Yeosang’s sweater and Wooyoung’s shirt. Just to make sure they stayed. Only then did a thought hit him. How come his friends were here?

“I couldn’t reach you…” Seonghwa spoke in a small voice.

“Oh, right… we were rushing here, I completely forgot to turn on my sound…” Wooyoung sighed. 

“You… you were coming here?” Seonghwa blinked, a bit confused. “Because… because I am no… no good on my own…?” his inner omega just pushed this question through before Seonghwa could stop himself.

“Nooo, Hwa…” Yeosang lifted his head to look at Seonghwa’s eyes. “Honestly, an entire chain happened…” His friend grabbed a pillow from the side to put it on Seonghwa’s chest and then placed his chin on it, giving a knowing look to Wooyoung.

“I was with San-ah when you woke him up. And he said you sounded off, but we thought maybe because of the hour or something…” Wooyoung started talking, with little rubs on Seonghwa’s back, resting his cheek on the top of his head.

“But then, a little while after, Mingi called San as well. He and Yuyu sounded truly concerned… and asked if we could go and check on you.” Yeosang cooed, with a faint but still comforting smile.

“I… called… Mingi-yah.” Seonghwa admitted in a whisper. “He… he said, he can’t give me any project… because he doesn’t think I can do it.” Seonghwa didn’t want to sound like he was complaining, but he also had to make sense of why he felt so down. Everything has built into an immense pile. And work could have distracted him.

“Well, of course, Hwa…” Wooyoung murmured. “We all know that your pre-heat might start any day now, so why would he give you a new project to work on?” Wooyoung pressed his lips against Seonghwa’s head, and Seonghwa felt Wooyoung’s little hum against his hair.

Oh. His… his… his pre-heat. Seonghwa had completely forgotten about it. The omega bit his bottom lip, curling more into the blanket and the scent of his two best friends. Yesterday, he suddenly started feeling down, craving Hongjoong’s scent. So desperately. And then panicked when he couldn’t find any because he had been gone… gone…

“He hasn’t come back… why hasn't he come back?” It felt as though heavy rocks had suddenly descended upon Seonghwa's chest, making it difficult for him to move. As if he continued searching for ways to hurt himself on purpose, to prove that he wasn’t good enough.

Of course, his friends didn’t need to be told who Seonghwa had in mind.

“Yeosang-ah can’t reach Jongho-yah either. Since yesterday, Hongjoong has had his phone turned off. Something is wrong with the signal…? Maybe they are on the plane, hm? Busy?” Wooyoung suggested with a soothing tone, leaving another smooch on Seonghwa’s head.

Jongho was Yeosang’s mate and also went on a business trip together with Hongjoong. But Hongjoong… Seonghwa’s mate… he had never left him in silence for so long. What if something happened? What if…

“Hwa… Hongjoong must be doing everything to come back to you. You know that, right?” Yeosang assured. “He loves you. Me, Wooyoung, Sannie, Mingi-yah, Yuyu, and Jongho-yah love you too. We love you so much.”

The rational part of Seonghwa understood where his insecurities came from - it was his messed up hormones and pheromones, the lack of his alpha when he was soon to enter the heat. That caused another distressed sound to leave his throat. Seonghwa didn’t want to think what would happen if Hongjoong didn’t come back home if the heat hit him soon.

“Aaaand…” Wooyoung suddenly straightened his back. “You wouldn’t want your alpha to find this mess, right? You’re the most perfect omega. He is so lucky to have you! And you’re so capable too! How about we show him just how much? He will regret leaving you alone for two weeks!” He encouraged getting off the couch, and Seonghwa raised hopeful eyes at him.

He could do that? He had the power to make Hongjoong regret leaving. Seonghwa whined a little when Yeosang got up as well, and both of his friends helped him to stand back on his feet from the comfortable couch.

“I brought cake! And some scented candles!” Wooyoung announced. “I baked the cake myself…” He brushed his oreo hair back with a proud smile, but Yeosang frowned in disagreement.

“Are you sure it’s good for our health?” He carefully laughed, receiving only a pillow in his face instead of an answer. 

Seonghwa's lips twitched as he saw his two friends bickering, but he already had his eyes focused on the mess around. Right… his alpha wouldn’t be happy to see that. But if Seonghwa cleaned everything, he could be proud, right? The omega slowly moved towards the shelf to start by putting the frames back into their places. As soon as he saw Hongjoong’s smile in one of the photos, Seonghwa bit his lip and carefully touched his mate’s face with his fingertips.

“Hey hey, no cuddling with your mate’s photos. Leave it for the real thing.” Wooyoung rushed to take the picture from Seonghwa’s hand just as another wave of sadness was about to hit him. Seonghwa turned to his best friend and then hugged him around the shoulders, pressing as close as he could.

Wooyoung lightly chuckled at this affection that wasn’t common to Seonghwa. 

“And then I will fix your hair. Please don’t ever attempt becoming a hairdresser, okay?” He smirked, but let go of his Seonghwa only when they both were ready. 

Seonghwa heard sounds in the kitchen, Yeosang walking around it. The kitchen also needed to be cleaned, but the living room came first. Seonghwa took a deeper breath in and started working around, which certainly helped to clear unnecessary thoughts and took a while. He didn’t stop, however, until he was satisfied with every corner of the room. Then unconsciously he had moved to the bedroom to fix his nest. Seonghwa used this chance to change into some clothes as well instead of a bathrobe. One of them and the most important was Hongjoong’s brown sweater that Yeosang had brought before and partly used like a blanket. Alpha’s sweater, even with its faded scent, still gave Seonghwa comfort.

After making sure his nest was perfect in every way, he left towards the kitchen, where his friends were sitting at the table, attempting to light the candle with the matches, but unsuccessfully. 

“Give… give to me,” Seonghwa suggested, as he was confident in this. At least before. Maybe he wouldn’t be able to light candles now? Seonghwa held his sigh, focusing on the task, slightly afraid he would fail, but a few moments later the candles were lit and he could already feel the pleasant vanilla and strawberry scent surrounding them.

“Nice.” Yeosang fondly smiled, moving to the cake, which was still packed. Then what have they been doing all this time?

“Sit, Hwa, I will fix your hair.” Wooyoung jumped off the chair and tapped several times for Seonghwa to sit on it. The omega, with a few steps, walked around, noticing that the mess he left after spilling the coffee was gone. Wooyoung was also holding scissors from the bathroom. He probably saw hair in the sink. 

Both of his friends helped Seonghwa to make up for the mess he did. This way, offering more unspoken support. Seonghwa was close to tearing up again. It didn’t make him feel less or anything, just bad for causing trouble. Seonghwa nervously rubbed his palms as he sat down on the chair, collecting some decent words for the apology while looking around his kitchen as if searching for any signs that could help him.

“Hwa… we’re planning on coming today anyway!” Yeosang spoke like reading Seonghwa’s mind. “We wanted to make it a surprise, you know… just a movie night for the three of us.”

“It can be movie day now instead!!” Wooyoung seconded, with a little giggle as he worked on cutting Seonghwa’s strands into the same length. “It’s been a while since you had short hair. Would you like to dye them too?”

“Dye?” Seonghwa raised his hopeful eyes. He would… maybe? Would his alpha be happy about it?

“Yes, do you want to, Hwa? You. What do you want?” Yeosang asked with a calm expression.

“I want… I would like to dye my hair…” Seonghwa answered in a weaker, than usual, voice, but already more confident while pulling the sleeves of Hongjoong’s sweater. “Pink… maybe pink?” he suggested. He always wanted them pink, and even Hongjoong mentioned that pink suits him well. The omega, still unconsciously, was thinking about what his alpha would like to see more.

“Sounds brilliant!” Yeosang seconded, putting the knife aside. “Woo-yah, would you like to retouch your roots?” he offered, “I could do a quick run to the store, mm?”

“Oh! That sounds good actually, right Hwa?” Wooyoung leaned in to kiss Seonghwa’s cheek with a wide smile. They watched Yeosang excitedly run into the hallway to put on shoes and his jacket. Seonghwa followed his friend, grabbing his phone before rushing through the door. And somehow he knew that the reason Yeosang needed to get out was to try calling Jongho again. 

“Woo-yah… I found something in Hongjoong’s studio. And… I can’t make myself look at it,” Seonghwa quietly confessed after a few minutes of only cutting sounds in the air. “I don’t know if I want… It's been there since the morning he left a few weeks ago. But only yesterday in the evening I read what’s written there.” His voice was getting weaker with every word.

“Do you want me to look at it?” Wooyoung confidently offered, just as expected from his best friend. Perhaps more than happy to look through Hongjoong’s personal stuff.

Seonghwa gave a brief nod. He was just scared to do it on his own. Wooyoung finished with the cutting and then walked with Seonghwa to the living room, carrying several candles as well, and placing them on the table. It looked like his friend wanted to leave Seonghwa on the couch, but he refused to stay alone, clinging to Wooyoung’s arm, so in the end they still went together. 

Seonghwa deeply inhaled with a little stutter when Wooyoung opened the door and walked in. His gaze stopped at Hongjoong’s table as he easily pulled the sheet from under the notebook. Seonghwa hid his face into Wooyoung’s shoulder as if the words could physically hurt him. Despite feeling better after seeing his friends, he still felt like everything was a bit too much. As if it could start slipping again any moment now.

“It’s song lyrics, Hwa…” Wooyoung exhaled after a pause. “It’s just song lyrics…” he repeated when Seonghwa dared to peek after giving himself time to breathe the air he was holding inside. He glanced at the full page again, furrowing his eyebrows. Some lines were crossed out and re-written, some little notes and corrections appeared here and there at the bottom of the page.

Seonghwa didn’t read everything, only the last lines.

But no matter what they said,

My love for you is the greatest power I have held

I will find my way back to you

Through scars and wounds

Nothing is Lost

“I am back! Where are you guys?” Yeosang’s voice reached them and Wooyoung dropped the sheet on the keyboard with a little encouraging wink, dragging Seonghwa with his wobbly lip out from the studio. Hongjoong never wrote a sad breakup letter. It was all in his head. It was all because Seonghwa missed him so much. After all, his preheat started and Hongjoong wasn’t here like he was supposed to be.

For the other few hours, they were busy playing hairdressers, and it helped to distract Seonghwa’s thoughts. First, they bleached his hair and then Wooyoung’s, while waiting just sitting on the living room carpet enjoying the cake, which Yeosang was more than glad to feed to Seonghwa instead of letting him touch the plate.

“It looks awesome! I should change careers!” Wooyoung beamed when they finally washed Seonghwa’s hair after dyeing it pink. “Wait wait, don’t look, let’s dry it first!” He then did a little jump when the omega wanted to turn at the mirror. Finally, something other than fears and insecurities overtook him - he was curious to see himself.

Yeosang with a little giggle then pushed Seonghwa down on a low chair and started drying his hair. A little chuckle escaped the omega’s lips as his chest filled with a warmth that he hadn’t felt since yesterday. He was so happy to see his friends. But he didn’t know how else to express it, just cling to Wooyoung in front of him, while holding on to Yeosang’s sweater.

Words weren’t needed. That was enough.

“You… staying with you feels…” Seonghwa tried so hard to collect his words.

“Amazing right?” Wooyoung patted his head.

“Like home,” Yeosang whispered with a little squeeze of Seonghwa’s fingers.

Like home.

The three of them were cuddling on the couch in the living room, watching a Korean drama. The cozy darkness surrounded only by the candles and their own soft scents. Even the rain that continued through all day was warm now. Seonghwa didn’t even feel when he started purring - when he saw how pretty the pink color suited him or when he got the last slice of cake.

All of them slightly flinched, when during a dramatic confession scene, Yeosang’s phone started ringing.

“It’s Jongho!” He excitedly said and Wooyoung immediately muted the TV. “Hi, baby…” Yeosang answered. “Is everything alright?” He listened. “Yes, we are okay now. You got the messages, right? Oh… of course!” Yeosang then turned to Seonghwa. “Someone wants to talk to you.” He offered him the phone.

Seonghwa softly gasped, because he knew who it was. Yeosang didn’t need to tell him.

“Starlight…” The voice murmured into his ear, making his heartbeat jump and his eyes fill with happy tears. Seonghwa didn’t even notice that his friends left, giving him space. “Hi, my love….”

“Joongie…” Seonghwa closed his eyes, letting his voice sink into him. “I miss you.”

“I miss you,” he repeated. “I miss you so much it hurts. My phone got stolen, and Jongho’s battery died, then we had to run to the airport, missed the flight… But I am on my way back. I will be home by dawn.”

“I will wait…” Seonghwa promised with a little sob of happiness. He didn’t need those excuses anymore, he just wanted Hongjoong to be back home. “Please come back, without you it’s cold.”

“I know, Starlight… I’m cold too.” they both sighed at the same time. “We haven’t talked for only two days and it feels like centuries…”

“Mmm… I dyed my hair pink,” he said, sort of out of the blue, but wanted to tell him that.

“Might just fall in love with you harder…” Hongjoong giggled - the most beautiful sound ever. “As if I don’t fall in love with you every day…” he paused. “My love for you is the greatest power I hold.”

“Nothing is Lost…” Seonghwa smiled into the phone, his eyes stopping at the photos in silver frames where his mate was smiling for him.

“You saw the lyrics for my song.” Hongjoong guessed with a little hum. “Did you like them?”

“Not the beginning.” Seonghwa sighed, nuzzling into Hongjoong’s sweater more. It felt like even his scent had returned. 

“I don’t like it either.” He agreed.

No more pain. No more fear. Hongjoong gave him strength. And dawn was just a couple of hours away.