Chapter Text
I’ve loved Katniss for a very long time.
I couldn’t say when it started, but I definitely knew I loved her the moment I figured out Peeta did too.
We were at school, and I vaguely remember Katniss singing. I should’ve been paying attention to her, but all I could look at was Peeta’s face as he watched Katniss. He watched her like she were the stars in the sky, and he was an astronomer studying her, marveled by her beauty.
From that moment, I knew we’d always be competing for her attention.
I made sure to get an early edge. I’d already known her name before she told me, but I figured calling her Catnip and pretending I’d misheard her would help me overpower Peeta. Dumb nicknames always win over girls, right?
The moment she was able to provide for her own family, I protected her when we went out to hunt. She even taught me something she had learned from her father, and I made sure to use those tactics around her to show how much I value her opinion. She’s confident, and treating her like a little child would instantly ruin her feelings towards me.
And it all came down to today. Today I would ask her to run away with me, so that neither of us ever have a chance of being reaped for the games again.
Before I go find Katniss, I need to be able to prove that we would work well together. That I could provide for her. So, on my way to her house, I decide to buy some bread. While I’m at it, I can even taunt the baker boy a little bit. I’m sure he’s working right now, so he’s got nothing better to do.
I walk down the street, a coat of haze making the horizon unseeable. The nearly identical shop fronts are so close together that where each building stops and begins is impossible to tell. The only difference between them is the carved all-capitalized letters in the bottom half of the building, informing of the shop's wares. The bakery has two words on opposite sides of the door, and they read PASTRIES and CAKES.
When I approach the bakery, Peeta is standing awkwardly to the left of the door with a tray of breads. He sees me, and immediately gives me a glare that would be intimidating if his face weren’t so innocent and cute looking.
Instead of acknowledging his hatred, I cheerfully ask, “Have any bread for sale?”
He looks down as if checking the bread didn’t disappear, and says, “Yeah. What have you got to trade?”
I pull the bag on my back around to my front, and unzip it to reveal the corpses of a couple rabbits. I grab them both by the legs, and I tug them out, showing them to Peeta. “This good?”
He nods once, and I throw the rabbits into a basket next to his feet meant for collecting sale profit. Peeta hands me the bread and I shove it into my bag, make sure to position it so it won’t get too squished, and shift it to my back where it was before.
I walk off, forcing myself to not look back and instead let Peeta glare at me as I walk towards Katniss’ house.
I know he knows where I’m going. I live in the opposite direction, so Katniss is the only reason I could be walking the way I am. The fact that Peeta knows his bread is going to her is satisfying, because I know he’d rather give it to her himself. He thinks I don’t deserve her at all.
The best part is he thinks he can do better. I can protect her, but all he can do is look pretty.
The walk to Katniss’ house is long, as I have to walk past all of the other houses on the long trail that crawls through the village. It doesn’t help that she resides in one of the farthest houses from the main part of the district. I live in one of the farthest houses in the opposite direction, so the walk between the two takes about 30 minutes, optimistically.
The long walks are worth it though. At least, they will be, once Katniss inevitably falls in love with me.
Katniss’ house looks like all the others, with rotting wooden planks forming the structure of the whole house, save for the sheet of rusting metal as a roof. The door is also rotting wood, but it’s holding up better than the rest of the house, as it was replaced a couple years back.
I wrench open the door, and the creaking sound it makes echoes through the house as I realize there’s nobody home. I glance over the small amounts of medicine and herbs spread over a center table and a back counter, and a singular light hung from the ceiling, turned off to save electricity. The district only gets so much of it.
I call out through the house, just to make sure Katniss isn’t here, before I leave the way I came through the front door.
Unless Katniss decided to take an early morning stroll through the shopping street, which she never does, she can only be in one place.
The woods.
I follow the path to the center of the district, waiting until I see my marker. When I first discovered there was a way into the woods through a busted fence, I had to make sure I could find it again, so I used a little spare rope and threw it over a branch, leaving it to dangle.
Of course, no one wanted to touch the rope, because everyone just started assuming it was an old hanging tree. To their knowledge, the rope carried the souls of hundreds. It’s a common district superstition that the past victims of hangings would haunt you if you made contact with the rope that stole their life.
I find the rope, which is swinging in the wind. Unfortunately, that means hunting with a bow won’t be as easy.
At least for me. Katniss perfected archery at a rate I could’ve never imagined. Somehow, she had almost perfect aim when I met her. Her father must’ve been an even better hunter, to teach her those skills that fast.
I toss my backpack over the fence before crawling through the opening in the bottom, a task that gets easier as the dirt gives way underneath the wiring each time I have to make the journey. I right myself on the other side of the fence, and dust off the powder that gathered on my clothing from the dry, crumbly dirt.
To find Katniss in the woods, you have to listen for her. She’s gotten incredibly good at hiding in the brush, so the only sign of her is the twang of her bow.
Or the crying of her victims.
I hear a faint rustling in the distance, and then a squelch as an arrow makes impact with its target.
Bingo.
I fight my way through the brush, and I get a glimpse of the signature black braid. I call, “Katniss!”
She halts, and I watch her glance around with a petrified look before she makes eye contact with me. Her face instantly shifts to an expression of utter disappointment. “Gale! God, I hate you.”
I wink at her, and then push past the bushes separating us. A deer lies dead on the ground to the left, an arrow impaling it perfectly in the eye. A Katniss signature, and the thing that makes her game so prized in the district.
I can feel Katniss watching me watch the deer, so I nod in approval. When I look at her, the corners of her mouth are slightly turned up in a smile, and I grin back, “Good shot.”
“I never miss.”
“No, you really don’t. It’s truly amazing.”
I look back down at the deer, and ask, “Need any help hauling that thing out?”
“No, I can take care of it.”
“Okay.” I pause, and I widen my eyes like I’ve just had a revelation, “Hold on, I need to show you something. Follow me.”
I run through the woods, and the crackle of leaves behind me tells me she’s following. I know that as soon as I took off, she knew where we were going. I’m taking her to the clearing, the only place in the district that can make us feel free. Like we’re leaving everything behind. The hunger, the survival, the reaping, all gone when we look over the hill and into the trees below.
After quite a bit of running, the forest opens up to an green prairie with the sun glancing beautifully over it. The switchgrass spatters on the hill, folding over each other like delicate waves. In the center of the hill, the grass spreads out and flattens, a spot worn over time as Katniss and I have sat and talked, watching the sunrise.
I sit down, pulling one of my legs up to my chest and laying my wrist over my knee. Katniss sits herself on my right, crossing her legs and holds her hands in front of her.
I reach behind me, and drag my backpack forward. I open the zipper, and pull out the bread, holding it out in front of her. Her face lights up, and the money I had to spend was instantly worth it. The way she looks at me like I hold the answers to the universe.
I’ve finally triumphed over Peeta. I got the girl, and he can’t do a thing about it.
She reaches to grab the bread, looking at me for approval, and I nod to show that it’s hers. Katniss clutches it like a lifeline, and asks, “Is this real?”
I laugh, and say sarcastically, “No, Katniss. It’s fake bread.”
She rolls her eyes, but she’s smiling brightly. She takes a bite of the bread, savoring it. She mumbles with bread still in her mouth, “Thank you.”
I nod, and look back out over the hill. Strangely, the forest outside looks more beautiful than I’ve ever seen it. This could be the last time I ever see this view, the last time I’m ever here with Katniss. If only she says yes.
I’m going to do it. I’m going to ask her to run away with me. What do I have to lose?
I say abruptly, “We could do it, you know.”
She looks at me confused, still holding the bread to her mouth, and asks, “Do what?”
“Take off. Live in the woods. What we do anyway.”
Uh oh. The look on her face is not the way I expected. I thought she’d be excited. She is definitely not excited. She looks concerned, and utterly confused.
I try to continue, “We’d be away from here! Away from the reaping!”
Her pained expression doesn’t change. She doesn’t want to hurt me. This just makes me more frantic and desperate for her to say yes.
I yell, starting to get angry, “I know you’re afraid that you or Prim will be called. You couldn’t stand not being able to take care of her!”
The instant I stop shouting, I know I’ve gone too far.
We don’t ever talk about the reaping. We especially don’t talk about her sister being called.
I say softly, “Sorry. That was uncalled for.”
She stands up, and looks down at me, “Yes. Yes it was.”
Katniss throws the bread at me and walks off. She doesn’t even look back.
I’ve ruined it. If I had just thought about my words for a single second, I might’ve been able to convince her. We could’ve brought Prim too, and that dumb cat of theirs if Katniss wanted. I would’ve done anything to keep her away from Peeta.
Now that I’ve gone and screwed it up, she’ll probably go to him. All I’ve worked for, all the hours spent hunting with her, they’re all wasted now.
I won’t get the girl.
A voice in my head speaks, “No, you idiot, you know she’ll forgive you. She always does.”
I think at the voice, “But what if she doesn’t? What if this is the one thing I can’t come back from?”
The voice doesn’t respond, and I know it’s right. Katniss will forgive me eventually. It’ll just take a little time.
Then I can win her back, and prove to Peeta I’ll have more of Katniss’ love than he’ll ever get.