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Am I a bad person?
Ei mulled the thought over in her mind. It was a selfish thing to do, thinking. One does not think in the Plane of Euthymia. One only meditates, keeps still, and prevents Erosion from taking its stone cold grasp.
The Archon figured that this question was an important one to ponder, and more important than losing time. So, she repeated.
Am I a bad person?
Logically, Ei was a bad person in all figures of the word. She’d abandoned her people, left them under the control of a puppet that she couldn’t get a rein over- and that had caused pain, suffering and death to the citizens of Inazuma. The exact opposite of what she wished to do.
Through her selfish fear of loving, Ei resulted in isolation to prevent them from being ripped away from her.
Them? There is no them. Ei loved nobody, and nobody loved her in turn. It was so paradoxical, she could have laughed. So, she entertained the idea that nobody would care if she never emerged from her silent sanctuary. Most likely, nobody would notice. The Shogun was still active, keeping the people safe now that the Vision Hunt Decree had been discarded. The people of Inazuma still had a leader, but the physical form was nowhere to be seen.
Ei didn’t have the Gnosis anymore. What was the point of staying around, really? Just to let Erosion make her insane and torment herself more?
I suppose I truly am a bad person.
Satisfied that she had found an answer to her question, Ei closed her eyes and continued to meditate, even as a hollow, painful pit grew in her stomach.
Yes, I am a bad person.
In fact, I am not even a person to begin with.
I will stay here forevermore. Close any entrance off. Let myself rot.
It's the punishment a failure of an Archon deserved.
For the first time in centuries, the Archon of Lighting let herself cry.