Chapter Text
He stared at the ring in the little velvet box in her favorite color. All the intricate details he put into crafting this thing. It was the most beautiful ring he had ever laid eyes on, if he were to say so himself. The center stone was a deep purple amethyst, encircled by white crystals. Along the sides, where delicately carved vines lay, were tiny emeralds. This ring had meaning, it had sentiment. It just… didn’t matter now . This was one of those ordeals where he collected the resources himself, and he even enlisted the help of SIfuu, who knew a thing or two about smithing. He was happy when he planned this. Now, he was crestfallen.
Hassian felt pretty confident when this all started. He thought that there was a mutual goal going into the relationship. Guess, in the end, he discovered that it was more of a situationship instead.
Whatever the younger generation was calling it nowadays.
Who was he going to talk to about this, though? Hassian didn’t want to face SIfuu and have to tell her that he was going through a failed glimmer of hope he thought he had achieved. This was really depressing. Especially since he did ask for his mother’s help and advice. What a fool.
Hassian wanted to chuck the ring across the beach, and if he could throw far enough, he hoped it would land in the pits of hell. You know… where heartbreakers and liars also belonged.
There was a multitude of emotions alongside the obvious devastation. Mostly anger, resentment, and the thought that he might never open up his heart to anyone else ever again. Still, it just wasn’t inside Hassian to find hate for Tamala. Love didn’t just go away with the blink of an eye, and she had been his love.
“This was never in the plan.” Tamala said to Hassian, who looked like she had just shot an arrow straight through his beating heart. That, or like she had dug her nails into his chest and ripped it out herself. If you look closely, you could see the imaginary blood dripping from her curled fingers, and onto the dewy grass.
“What do you mean, never in the plan?” Hassian thought that the notion to date somebody would ultimately lead to a higher level in the relationship. He thought that he would completely devote himself to her, and that she would just do the same thing. How foolish he felt, because Hassian was too blinded by his love to consider not everyone dated to get married.
It didn’t mean that it had to make sense to him. Why bother dating someone at all if you planned on hurting them at some point?
“Hassian, I was only in this for the thrill… the passion.”
She must have misplaced his passions for merely fun, but no… Hassian was not the type to even give somebody his passionate side that way. Only truly special beings could taste the desire on his lips when they kissed him. That special being was supposed to always be her. Now what was he going to do? That was the repeating thought playing around his head like Kenyatta’s old record player.
He didn’t sleep, just thought about those last few moments with Tamala before he retreated back home and stared blankly at the wall the rest of the night. Morning came, and it felt like years had passed. Which was why he went out and thought some salty air might bring him somewhat back to life. He was wrong, but he still did it anyways.
It was days before Hassian went back to see his mother and tell her what had happened. She was still under the impression that Hassian was going to give her happy news. It was something SIfuu looked forward to, because before Hassian and Tamala got into their relationship, he didn’t spend that much time with her. SIfuu knew that she had always been kind of overbearing Hassian’s whole childhood. She was just very enthusiastic to have had her own little version of herself, even though he would eventually grow into a man that wanted to do his own thing.
The story of most parents, she thought. Hassian would always be her little man, no matter how old or different he became.
They were supposed to have dinner at Sifuu’s house, so, she arranged things as best as she could, and waited for her son to come.
She embraced Hassian tightly as soon as he walked through the door. He just looked plain defeated and didn’t even protest when she did this like he usually would. Hassian didn’t have the energy to fight off the strength of her arms this time. At this point, he still hadn’t slept. If he did, it surely wasn’t restful.
“You look exhausted. I’m guessing from all the heat after the engagement?” She chuckled, wiggling her brows and nudging Hassian with her elbow.
SIfuu could also be kind of intrusive with how openly she talked about things. Nothing was off the table with her, even with her own son - whom she still expected would come to her for advice on everything, no matter what it entailed.
Hassian’s whole body was aching. His head split in two with the worst headache on the planet. He thought going on some sort of depressive alcoholic bender wouldn’t be the best route. But he did consider it briefly, until that first beer didn’t settle right with his stomach when he tried. Just not how he wanted to maneuver through this heartbreak. No mind-altering crutch would change anything. Except maybe a decline in health and a slippery slope of even more depression.
“No, definitely not.” He fished the box out of his pocket.
SIfuu felt her heart drop to her toes when he revealed that the ring was still snug in the foam that held it there. Oh, she would rip this woman’s head off if she didn’t think that Hassian would hate her for it. She would deal with this frustration later, and just focus on trying to console her son however he let her do it.
“I misjudged. She didn’t want the same things that I did.” He said flatly. “I’m sorry for the disappointment.”
“I am not disappointed in you. ” Sifuu reassured Hassian. He didn’t even look into his mother’s eyes, though. He just clutched that damn box in his hand and shuffled his feet on the floor.
SIfuu thought that it might be a little easier if she relieved him the burden of holding onto the ring that they crafted together. She covered Hassian’s hand with her own, and then cupped it from the bottom with her free hand. This motherly instinct was appreciated, whether or not Hassian would voice it. He could only nod while his chest hurt and his eyes filled up with tears.
After about a month dragged by, Hassian was back to doing most of his daily routines. He was starting to feel himself become a bit more distant and closed off to everyone. He didn’t keep that many people in his close circle, except for his plumehound, and the local farmer’s son. Even then, one was a pet, and the other looked up to him as a big-brother type since his actual brother was always spending time with his “secret” girlfriend. The girl who so happened to be the mayor’s daughter, to boot.
Not relevant.
Anyways, Hassian was still licking the wounds of his recent breakup. Still hadn’t turned to any unhealthy vices, and was just trying to focus on building walls around him. He didn’t go out all that much, and when he did, he almost completely lost himself at the familiar silhouette of her standing in the Inn. She was so casual, looking completely unbothered with her attention on the cook across the counter. Hassian honed in on the two of them, but not until he somewhat covered himself from their view.
Her deep crimson colored nails could be seen dragging themselves up the tattooed arm of the cook, who Hassian knew as Reth - who he really didn’t give a rat’s ass about in the first place. Now this was enblazened by a deep envious feeling that tightened Hassian’s chest.
Reth was the type to flirt with every single female soul within his sights. He was a smooth talker, who obnoxiously made it a point to flaunt his looks about. Regardless of how visually appealing someone was, it was annoying to see it go to such a conceited waste. Hassian had personally seen this man play with women’s minds and make them cry because he wouldn’t commit to them.
Come to think of it, maybe Tamala and Reth were perfect for one another. If she wanted fun , then she could get it very easily with that one.
Maybe the jealousy got in control of Hassian that evening, because what came after was completely out of character for him. He could only remember approaching the two of them and asking Tamala how it felt to already be moved on when he was still dying inside. Reth had made one snarky comment, and it was game over. Hassian gave him one solid punch across his stupid high cheekbone, and was pulled out of the Inn by Hodari.
Hodari had promised not to tell SIfuu about the incident, but she of course still found out. News always traveled fast in Kilima Valley, after all.
Target practice was merely to refine his skills with his bow and arrow, but he still did it so well. It was several more months post-break up, and also after he’d knocked the shit out of Reth. Hassian wasn’t his old self, but he wasn’t depressed about the past at this point, or so he liked to tell himself. The sadness morphed into more of that distant, cold demeanor. He still spent a good chunk of time with Auni, which brought out his less abrasive side. Auni wasn’t the cause of his dismay, anyways. All the kid wanted to do was play several games of cards now and then.
When Hassian was distant, he also became reclusive, aloof. He and Tau would always be out and about on journeys. It was just how he liked to spend his life, because it was less complicated that way. He never wanted another complication to come into his life ever again.
He just never expected someone like you to come into his life.
Specifically, when he was still in the thick of his mindless target practice, and you walked out in the middle of the field, a map completely unfolded in your hands. You looked so lost, and he didn’t see you when he shot the arrow into the target only three feet away from your body. You yelped in shock, and Hassian threw down his bow because he thought that he missed and actually shot someone.