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Luna tossed and turned in her bed, trying to get comfortable, but found that she couldn’t. Nights like this were hard. It didn’t matter how much tea she drank before bed… How cool her pillow was…. If the blankets were just right… None of it mattered.
Not on the nights when her heart ached for the other part of her soul. Where she felt incomplete without him, like her heart had been ripped from her chest, and all that was left was an aching, empty cavity.
Closing her eyes, visions of Loki filled her mind. The way he held her… How he protected and cared for her before they went their separate ways.
With a groan, Luna slipped out of her bed and grabbed her nighttime robe. Putting it on and tying the belt around her waist, she made her way to the rooftop terrace of her flat building. She knew that no one would be up there that time of night and she wanted to be alone.
As she pushed open the heavy door to the rooftop, a fresh blast of cool air caressed her skin, and a sigh of relief fell from her lips.
Merlin, she missed him. She missed him in ways that she couldn’t put into words.
With an aching heart, she found one of the patio chairs up there and curled up on it. She hugged her knees to her chest, tears pricking the corners of her eyes.
She hated that he had to leave. That he couldn’t stay here on Earth with her… But she understood why. His world needed him. Jötunheimr needed a ruler, and somehow, the responsibility had fallen onto Loki’s shoulders.
He had asked her to come with him, but she couldn’t leave her father and friends. Nor the career that she had worked so hard to achieve. She didn’t regret her decision to stay, but on nights like this, she couldn’t help but wonder what if.
What if she had gone? Would she have been happy there with Loki? Was he all that she could have needed?
But then she thinks of never seeing her father again, and her heart splits into two.
She hated that they went their separate ways.
They were worlds apart, and her heart was broken in two.
“I still love you, Loki,” she whispers into the cool night air. Taking a deep breath, she let go. She let go of the hurt and anguish, allowing the tears to fall from her eyes. She grieved the loss of him and their love. She grieved for the future she could have had. Letting go of the confusion and fear, she allowed herself to just feel. She held space for everything inside her, knowing that there wasn’t anything else she could do.
There was no changing the course that their lives had taken.
Little did she know that worlds apart; Loki was thinking of her the same way.
“My moonbeam,” he whispers in anguish, staring up at the sky, reaching out across the distance for her.