Work Text:
Setting: Monstadt Library
“Alright, I’ll help you to do it then,” Lisa starts preparing to help Sucrose make a Anemo Hypostasis. She gets Anemo Slime Concentrate, Anemo Crystalflies, her imported Anemo Spectral Heart, a Boreas’ Spirit Locket and Anemo Samsachurl Scroll. “Oh, I almost forgot the Hurricane Seeds and Varjuda Turquoise Chunks!”, Lisa did not notice the drunk Kaeya walking towards her materials, Death after Noon in hand.
Tripping over a Samsachurl Staff, Kaeya spills his drink over the materials, resulting in a swirl reaction that sprayed Lisa in alcohol. Enraged, Lisa superconducts Kaeya and ults corn onto him, dealing increased physical damage. Neither of them noticed the pile of materials gradually forming a shape that resembled a bard.
The bard was able to fly with seeds and wings: had a pure wind constitution, a Gnosis like thing which was actually the Spectral Heart encased in Spirit Locket, used to do an ancient art known as “Wind’s Grand Ode”. He knew stories from long lost Khaenri’ah and needed to drink alcohol to reduce the water potential of the slime he was made of through osmosis so he could remain solid.
“Lisa, have you found a way to create a portal back to my world yet?” Aether chose this very moment to stride into Lisa’s lab. As Lisa gestures to a notebook, Aether could have sworn he heard lightning strike and the rumble of a brewing storm. The notebook read: ‘Hairy Portal: leads to a fantasy world; Scaly Pour The: filled with strange snakes and peacocks, home to a strange energy not unlike abyssal magic; Black Hole Portal: a world where half the moon was blown up by a mouse, and tentacled creatures are everywhere’.
With an exasperated sigh, Aether stands back up and turns around, tripping over a fried ‘hilichurl?’ that looked suspiciously like Kaeya, falling facefirst into the bard’s chest.