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“Dorothea!”

She looked up to see Felix walking into the Black Eagles room.

“I need your…” He hesitated, taking a deep breath. “…help.”

“Oh, the great and mighty Felix needs my help? What an honor! What-”

“Shut the fuck up!” He shoved her lightly, then sighed. “I tried asking Ingrid for help but she said you were better for this kind of thing.”

Dorothea smiled at him. “You know that we’re friends. I’ll totally help!”

“I didn’t even say what- never mind.”

“So, what’s this about? Is it a clothing thing? Or maybe an acting thing?”

When Felix started blushing, she grinned excitedly. “Does little Felix have a cruuuush?”

“No! I just… harbor a romantic attraction to someone and I don’t know if she feels the same…”

“SHE’S A GIRL??”

“What have I gotten myself into-”

“I didn’t think you were into girls.”

Felix scoffed. “I am not really ‘into’ anyone-”

“But her?”

He didn’t respond, but his blushing face revealed his thoughts.

“Anyways, is it Annette? Mercedes?”

“No, they’re like sisters to me.” He sighed. “Why are you trying to guess? I could just tell you-”

“Hush, it’s more fun this way.”

Dorothea then spent almost forty five minutes listing every single female student at the monastery. (It was much harder because she didn’t know everyone outside her house too well.)

“Is it Petra? Ingrid?”

“Why would you ask about your own girlfriends-”

“Is it me??”

Felix just sighed tiredly.

“How can it not be any of them?!”

“She’s not a student.”

“Well then who is she? If she’s not a student she could be anyone!”

He muttered something unintelligible.

“Felix, you’ve got to speak up.”

“Fine. It’s your professor, Byleth.”

At Dorothea's excited gasp, he abruptly got up. “That’s it, I’m done talking to you.”

“Wait, wait, wait, don’t goooo I know all her favorite stuffffff-”

“You’re certain these are her favorites?” Felix was holding a bouquet of hyacinths and orchids, all in various shades of blue and purple.

“One hundred percent!” Dorothea rubbed her hands together excitedly. “Look, she’s right there,” She shoved him in her direction, “Go get her!”

When Byleth spotted Felix, she grinned and walked over. “Hey, Felix! What’ve you got there?”

He awkwardly shoved the flowers in her face. “These are for you.”

She gasped excitedly, taking the bouquet. “For me? Really?” She grinned, “Wow, all my favorite flowers too. Thank you Felix!”

Felix smiled back, blushing lightly. “You’re welcome, I just wanted to say…” He could feel Dorothea’s eyes burning a hole into his back. “I wanted to say that… you’re a good professor. Thanks for doing whatever it is that you do.”

“Awww, Felix-”

“Professor!”

“Oh, I’m sorry. Ferdinand needs something, we can talk more later, ok?”

“…Alright.”

“You’re hopeless,” Dorothea clapped him hard on the shoulder.

“No I’m not-”

“You literally chickened out of a confession-”

“Shut up.”

Dorothea sighed. “I don’t think I can help you. Why don’t you ask Sylvain?”

Felix scowled, “Do I have to?”

“He’s not the best at indirectness, but that’s really what you need.” She shrugged nonchalantly. “I suppose you could also ask Lorenz-”

“I’ll go talk to Sylvain.”

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“Sylvain.”

“Felix!” His friend greeted him, soon followed by another, snootier, voice.

“Ah, Felix. We haven’t spoken much, have we?”

Felix scowled internally. Of course they were together, why wouldn’t they be? They were inseparable nowadays…

“We haven’t.” He frowned at the purple haired teen. “Why are you here?”

Lorenz scoffed. “I do what I want, when I want, you know.”  He swished his hair dramatically. “As a noble-”

He was interrupted by a sigh from Sylvain. “Lorenz just let it be. Anyways, Felix, what’s up?”

“Why would you think something’s up?”

“You know…” He sounded tense. “You tend to avoid people unless there’s something you want. Whether it be a verbal fight or to spar.” Both Lorenz and Sylvain then suddenly flinched back, thinking Felix would rage at them. They both knew how often that happened.

“…” Felix collected his thoughts. “I suppose you’re right. In all aspects.”

“What the shit? You’re agreeing with me? That’s the first time in-”

“Not agreeing.”

His friend just laughed. “Why did you come here in the first place?”

“I need, uh, advice. Of the relationship variety.”

“Listen,” Felix turned to him, expectedly. “Just because I'm with Lorenz doesn't mean I know how I did it. Or how it happened, for that matter.”

“You idiot.” Lorenz scowled at Sylvain, hitting him lightly on the back of the head. “Don’t you remember that we were fighting over a girl and Dorothea walked by? She was like ‘you guys should kiss’ and we. We just did. I suppose we should thank her, maybe brew her some tea-”

“Babe, I’m not dumb. Of course I remember that. I meant that in a more figurative sense.”

Felix just sighed. “I’ll leave you two to your lover’s quarrels and return to training. That should properly clear my head.”

“Wait, wait.” Sylvain shushed his boyfriend. “We’re great at flirting with girls. We can help you, Felix.”

Felix’s frown deepened. “Well you’re both dating a man. I don't think you can say that your talents are with women.”

The three were silent for a second.

“You’re right, my friend!” Felix turned to Sylvain, absolutely bewildered. “I would say that my talent lies with my lance.”

Lorenz flushed bright red while Felix sobbed internally. “The technique lies within the grip of the shaft-”

“I fucking hate you.”

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Felix sparred alone, the training grounds unusually empty.

“Felix! Need a sparring partner?”

Felix briefly glanced up, before scoffing and returning to his sword. “I don’t spar with wild animals.”

“Are you certain? Because-”

“Leave me alone, boar.”

“-I’m certain I can help with your predicament.”

Felix raised an eyebrow and lowered his sword. “What ‘predicament’ do I have?”

“You know.” Felix did know, he just didn’t want to admit it.

He just sighed. “How can you of all people help, boar?”

“I’m certain that you know me and Dedue are-”

“You and the dog? Never thought a dog and a boar could date.”

Dimitri flushed red. “D-date? Where did you get that idea?”

Felix frowned. “Was that not what you came to talk to me about? Relationship advice, or whatever?”

“What? No!” Dimitri laughed. “I was going to talk about your anger and how Dedue and I can help you with that.”

Felix scowled. “If you’ve got nothing useful to say, leave.”

“Does that mean you find relationship advice useful-”

“LEAVE.”

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“I assumed I would find you here.”

Felix whirled around, only to see Hubert. Why the fuck was Hubert here? If he was being honest, Hubert scared him. But then again, he was pretty sure everyone was scared of Hubert.

“Hubert. What do you want?”

“I hear you’ve been improving your reason.” He sat down on the side.

“And what if I have?”

“Show me.”

“What?”

“Show me a spell on that.” He pointed to a bale of straw.

“Why?”

Hubert just smiled menacingly.

Felix conjured up lightning, creating a crack of thunder and setting the straw ablaze.

“There.”

Hubert just seemed to mutter something to himself. Something that sounded suspiciously like “valuable asset” and “join the eagles.”

“Why are you even here,” Felix scowled at Hubert, who just ignored him. “You’re just being a distraction.”

“Ah, I heard that you require,” Hubert seemed to think for a second. “Advice.”

Felix didn’t even have to question what specific advice. He knew. If weird ass Hubert knew, then the whole monastery must know- he’s probably the center of so many shitty rumors by now. Which he didn’t care about at all. Of course.

Felix just sighed. “What do you want to say?”

“You know Ferdinand.” He phrased the comment like a statement over a question. “He, hm, charmed me by being himself. I believe that is the key.”

Felix rolled his eyes. “That’s really shitty advice. But thanks anyways, I guess.”

“‘Twas my pleasure.”

Chapter Text

The next day, Felix received an invitation to tea. He was bewildered, as no one (except Byleth) ever invited him to tea, even more so when he learned it was from Ferdinand von Aegir himself.

When Felix sat down across from him, things were awkwardly silent. None of their interests overlapped and they really had nothing to say to each other. He sipped the tea, realizing it was his favorite kind. “…How’d you know my favorite tea?”

“Ah, that.” Ferdinand grinned and drank some tea. “Professor Byleth told me that, can you believe it?”

Felix believed it- she always brought his favorite tea to their impromptu tea parties- so he said nothing. It was silent again for a while.

“So… you and Hubert?”

Ferdinand blushed and took a long sip of the tea. “What about us?”

“…You have poor taste in men. What exactly do you see in him?”

“As for the poor taste, of course I do. I mean, I was crushing on you once upon a time.”

“WHAT-“

“As for what I see in him, I don’t really know. I suppose he’s handsome and charming in his own way…”

“CAN WE GO BACK TO YOU CRUSHING ON ME FOR A SECOND?!”

“You know, that reminds me of why I invited you in the first place.”

That shut Felix up quick, as he stared expectantly at Ferdinand.

“Hubert told me that you were ‘lusting,’ as he put it, after the professor.”

“Lusting?! I do not-”

“Lust? Yeah, Hubert said that you would say that.”

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Uhhh hey yall !!
Js letting you know this fic will probably be rewritten to match my current headcanons/playthrough lol
It’s not dead dw
Bye bye 👋