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Kazuki was shocked when the man pointed his gun on him, when Soushi jumped in the way, when Maya shot the man. All of it happened too fast for Kazuki, and when he was done talking to Maya he went to Soushi.
Soushi was going to sacrifice his life for him, take a bullet for him; it angered Kazuki. If Maya hadn't showed up when she did, Soushi would have been the one bleeding on the ground.
The thought made Kazuki want to throw up, he couldn't stand it. Having to lose Soushi again, just thinking about it terrified him. That's why Kazuki could not let it happen again.
When he found Soushi he was talking to Narain.
Kazuki approached them and Soushi glanced at him and smiled before returning his attention to Narain. He was acting almost as if he didn't nearly throw his life away just a few hours ago.
He waited until the others walked away and Soushi turned towards him curiously. Kazuki immediately frowned and placed a hand on his hip. He was so mad.
"Idiot!" Kazuki said first, catching Soushi by surprise. Soushi blinked confused by the sudden crude word thrown at him. "You stupid selfless idiot!"
"Did I do something?" Soushi asked, further confused as Kazuki started to ramble.
"Last night!" Kazuki stepped closer to him. "Why did you jump in the way? You could have died Soushi, if Toomi hadn't shown up you would be dead!" Understanding came to Soushi's face and he smiled wryly.
"I don't regret my actions."
"You-"
"-and if the situation called for it I would do it again. I- we can't lose you, Kazuki," Soushi confessed. Although it did nothing to calm Kazuki; if anything, it only made him more angry.
"And you think everything would be okay if you died instead?" Kazuki asked. He knew all Soushi thought about was the island the fafners but this was ridiculous. He couldn't accept him doing something like that.
Soushi closed his eyes. "Yes."
Kazuki's eyes grew wide and he slapped Soushi. "How could you say that!" He grabbed Soushi's collar and glared at him. "Me, Toomi, everyone on the island, we would all be devistated if you died again..." Kazuki's anger started to melt into sadness.
"Kazuki, I-"
"Shut up!" Kazuki ignored the sting in his eyes. He needed to make sure he never did anything like that again. "I don't want to lose you again, to be right there and be unable to do anything as you die!"
"Kazuki-"
"I don't want to hear your excuses!" He was crying. "You don't understand how much it hurts to have the person you love die in your hands!" Kazuki didn't want to feel that way again, that anguish. "You expect me to let that happen again Soushi?"
"..." Soushi had a look in his eyes Kazuki had never seen, but Kazuki knew Soushi long enough to know he wouldn't apologize for his actions.
"Why are you so stubborn?" Kazuki questioned, calmer than his earlier explosion. "You constantly make sure that no one else does anything similar to what Shoko and Koyo did, and yet....and yet you go around and try to throw your life away for me."
"That's-"
"Don't be a hypocrite Soushi." Kazuki let him go then looked down at the ground. "I don't want your life Soushi."
Soushi silently stared at him, that same expression remaining. Soushi took a few steps towards Kazuki, and Kazuki stepped back. They repeated once more before Soushi just grabbed him and pulled him into his arms. "I'm sorry Kazuki."
"Let me go." He didn't want to be held, he wanted Soushi to live, to not throw his life away for him.
"No." Soushi tightened his hold on him. It was starting to feel less like a hug and more so a way to stop Kazuki from walking away after getting his point across. "I didn't mean to hurt you."
"You didn't hurt me..." That was a lie. He was extremely hurt by Soushi's actions. There wasn't a single fiber of Kazuki's being that was greatful for it. He was only angry and sad.
"You're mad that I almost put you through the same experience twice, but Kazuki, I don't ever want to experience that." He nuzzled his face in Kazuki's neck, and Kazuki attempted to push him away.
"No, you can't say that..." Kazuki didn't want to hear this, it wasn't fair. Soushi didn't get to do this. Not this time.
"I'm not strong enough to watch you die and be okay." Soushi clutched the back of his shirt. "Toomi would probably kill me for failing to protect you anyway," he said it almost comically.
"That's not true-"
"-It is," Soushi cut him off. Kazuki was pretty sure he was getting revenge for how he treated him now. Soushi loosened his hold and gazed at Kazuki. "I want you to live as well Kazuki. That's why, even if I have to use my life, I will protect you."
Kazuki glared at Soushi through his tears. "You are no fair."
"Has anything in our lives ever been fair?"
"I hate you."
"You don't mean that."
Kazuki stared at him for a minute before stomping on his foot, causing Soushi to let him go. "You really are an idiot." He then walked away angrily.
Kazuki didn't care. He would protect Soushi, even if that meant making him go through the same things he did. Because Kazuki knew Soushi was strong enough to handle it.