Chapter Text
If Ryuunosuke had to comment on his first experience as a human being, he wouldn't mention anything about his birth or his first cry. His first feeling, albeit strange, was resentment. Pure, burning hatred towards the person gazing at him with those bottomless, dark eyes that ate away at Akutagawa's tiny form.
It was then, that night, his fate got sealed to be known as more than a silent dog, a protector in the eyes of defenseless children.
He was human then.
He felt human.
That, however, did not last for long.
Each bruise, every training reminded him of how little he mattered to that man. He was lesser than human, lesser than an animal.
Staring at the towering building in front of him, Ryuunosuke stood motionless, dark coat hung around his body, pathetically protecting him from the heavy rain that terrorized Yokohama this evening. Grey clouds cried, their misty hands covering the setting sun from the morbid misery that is Ryuunosuke's life. People stayed in the café on the first floor, sheltering away from the icy rain and harsh winds. His black hair clung to his neck, his eyes peering into the windows with such intricate design, reminding him of Gin.
Ryuunosuke's gaze lowered. Grey pavement resembled more black than anything, wet from the drops of rain splattering on its surface. A door loomed in front of him, it led to the cozy café, pristine windows revealed the interior of the shelter hiding people away from the cries of the sky. His body itched for warmth, for the comfort the café provided with its hot tea and sugary treats—but he stayed in place, as if it was his mission to remain in the rain and wait.
Wait and wait and wait..
Time hasn't crossed Ryuunosuke's mind, but even if it had, he had no device to check how long he's been waiting for. All he knew is that it was afternoon when he arrived and now the sun drifted to sleep, the sunset overwhelming the sky with its scorching colours of orange and red. The transparent rain drops fleetingly reflected back the soft light squeezing from the gaps in the clouds, it was a beauty to see, the hope for a rainbow envelops Ryuunosuke's heart, a memory of the first rainbow he's seen with Gin running through his mind.
'Ryuu,' she spoke, tiny arms wrapped around Ryuunosuke. Her eyes stared off in amazement that such beauty could exist in such a cruel, poor world. The warmth of her body next to his erased the worry of waking up dead from the cold night. There was no such thing as death when he had Gin next to him. 'Is this normal? What is this called? Will tomorrow have such pretty colours, too? Maybe flowers will bloom and I'll make you a flower crown.'
The earthy taste of dirt mixed with grass and stems of plants, the mildly sweet flavor of common little flowers spread once more on Ryuunosuke's tongue. The memory of shoving flowers down his throat on pitiful days without being able to provide food.. his stomach churned with vomit, the vegetal flavour still lingered in his mouth, even after years. He didn't hate it, he couldn't hate it, anything that kept Gin's face, her voice, her everything, was valuable. Even if it was that image of her crying face after Ryuunosuke got tortured by adults once more, even if it's—
The door in front of him swung open, a gloved hand stopped it from slamming against the wall. Silky ginger hair gracefully flowed down the person's head like a rusty, falling halo of an angel attempting to redeem themselves, the longer portion peacefully resting on his shoulder. Sienna brown eyes glimmered as the last rays of the sun hit them, they transform into a stunning brown holding life like no other. Sleek black gloves hid his hands that now rested on his hips. His entire exterior wafted off elegance coupled with his powerful good looks.
"Where were ya?!" Chuuya huffed in annoyance, voice booming out into the icy streets. He stood in the entrance, unwilling to let his elegant black hat get into the rain. "C'mon, what'cha doing staying all motionless like a dead stray? Get in!"
Ryuunosuke did not argue. His gaze fell down onto the ground once more as he took a hesitant step forward, taking a few more with more confidence and entering the building. The warmth in the café phrased through him, cold clung to him like pain did. Sweet smell of strawberry shortcake and other delicacies spread throughout the entire café, the cramped space only got less comfortable as Chuuya led Ryuunosuke towards an old-fashioned elevator. He clicked a button and the doors closed, Ryuunosuke's thoughts drowned out any noise–too anxious wondering what will meet him.
"It's your turn now," Chuuya stated, pulling out a tiny mirror to fix the already neat ginger fountain of hair streaks streaming down his face. He added, noticing Akutagawa's confusion. "Entrance exam."
Ryuunosuke has never taken an entrance exam. Or, perhaps, he did.
Was nearly fighting Chuuya only to miraculously get into the Sheep an entrance exam?
No... yet, it sounded familiar, it must be something close.
The accustomed adrenaline rush during the usage of Rashoumon in little or bigger fights—will it come back? Ryuunosuke hadn't taken a break from training, led under Chuuya's watchful eye when they were still under the radar, hiding. The usual pain twisting in Ryuunosuke's guts from a punch, slap or even a kick given by.. that man, it disappeared once Chuuya took him under his wing. Bandaids hid the healing scars, never has a hand been raised at him for two years without any consequences.
"You'll be a detective. Exciting, eh?" A flash of sorrow tainted Chuuya's angelic face. A bad memory, perhaps.
"I don't belong there, Nakahara."
"Neither do I," Chuuya admitted. "But we'll manage, yeah?"
The elevator doors opened, revealing a hallway. It's not spacious, but not cramped either. If you were to try to fit fifty people here, you wouldn't be able to. Chuuya hummed under his nose, striding towards the door with a golden plate.
Words written with sharp letters, a few scratches littered the plate that announced its age and history. The famous words presented with honor, "The Armed Detective Agency".
Chuuya opened the door, without much of a care to knock—he had been here just mere moments ago, he would've knocked if he were there the first time. Light green floors blinded Ryuunosuke as the lights reflected back from the spotless surface. He blinked, immediately gazing into the cross embedded in the wall. His lips pressed into a firm line, curiosity engraved in his irises.
Chuuya, noticing Ryuunosuke's stare, shrugged. "Don't question the President, boy."
"..I'm not a child."
"Tch! You are, in my eyes."
Chuuya ignored their height difference, nodding towards a giggling man, who totally towered over Chuuya.
Ryuunosuke's eyes narrowed, focusing on the slim figure hidden in eccentric clothing, which only highlighted his long white hair tied in a braid. Stuck over one of his eyes, the card further proved a point. He did not look like the serious and collected members of the agency Akutagawa has heard so much about—he seemed more of a clown, a performer. A black and white hat rested on his head, which nearly fell off as he lunged towards them.
"Saaaalutations!" He dragged the word through a slow path in the mud, his voice rung in the air even after he was finally done with that tiny but oh so loud greeting. "Ah, the new newbie! Watch out, don't get hypothermia on us now, hm?"
Ryuunosuke stared at him like a lost, tiny child, words stuck in his throat. The loud voice shook him to the core, where's the peacefulness he's been expecting? Chuuya snorted, covering his mouth behind his hand.
"So shy! I don't bite, promise," he spoke, the promise did not seem honest in the slightest. "I am... the greatest, the most amazing, handsome, amazing, and funny— Gogol! Nikolai Gogol, to be more exact."
Nikolai, as he was called, winked at Chuuya, who only huffed—holding back his laughter at the horribly calm yet horrified face of Ryuunosuke. Ryuunosuke, on the other hand, grimaced and took a step back. He had not the least wish to speak to a comedian, not when he was in the state of mourning. Ryuunosuke tensed up at Chuuya's arm patting him on his shoulder, but he quickly relaxed—not fully, however.
"Alright, give him some space, Gogol," Chuuya interrupted before Nikolai could get any idea on how to torment Ryuunosuke. "The entrance exam, yeah?"
"We don't usually do this." Nikolai placed a hand on his chest, right where his heart is. He bended down slightly, to match Ryuunosuke's height. "But Oda has recommended you two—how can you say no to that charmer!"
'Oda?'
Ryuunosuke vaguely remembered that name. His shoulders tensed up, back straighter than a line. His eyes averted their gaze somewhere else, anywhere but that face of a true actor—someone, who could threaten anyone easily without batting an eye. Vomit moved in Ryuunosuke's stomach, he reminded him of someone, the pain of a kick bursting through his stomach. Nikolai's smile widened, white teeth similar to that of a sharks. Shadows casted on his face from the white bangs obscuring it, the lights above shone down on them.
"Nakahara," Ryuunosuke started, softly, glancing towards Chuuya. "Who is Oda?"
Hairs on the back of Chuuya's neck stood still, stiff as a knife threatening him to stay quiet. "Well.. you'll meet him in no time. He's a good friend."
Ryuunosuke nodded. His gaze drifted towards Nikolai, who was tampering with his nails, obviously irritated by the lack of attention or fun. Nikolai shuddered, his eye brightening with an idea—surely, a devious one. Ryuunosuke's nose subtly scrunched, was his life in the hands of idiots like him? Ryuunosuke turned his head away from the clown, and instead, gazed into Chuuya.
"Nakahara," Ryuunosuke spoke up one more. "I do not mean to be rude but.."
Ryuunosuke's eyes flickered towards Nikolai before going back to Chuuya. Chuuya shrugged his shoulders, an inert smile crept up on his lips. He leaned on a wooden desk, presumably one of the detectives desk seeing as there were black chairs paired to them and loads of papers scattered.
Nikolai wrapped an arm around Ryuunosuke's shoulders, his grip felt unexpectedly strong and ridiculously safe. His lips close to Ryuunosuke's ear. If only he didn't speak so loudly.. "Nope, don't worry! I'm just special in my own great way." His voice fades with his smile as he utters the next sentence. "I have so much to do before becoming truly free."
Ryuunosuke pushed Nikolai away, who only laughed. Ryuunosuke huffed in annoyance, eyes glaring at the eccentric detective. How could morons like him even land a job at such a place? With those strong arms, tall height.. he could most certainly do well in combat. But unfortunately, as it seems, his brain is lacking in intelligence department. Not only that, but winking at Chuuya Nakahara! Ryuunosuke's fingers clenched into fists, holding himself back from unleashing Rashoumon.
"Stop messing with him, let's just get this over with, yeah?"
"If you say so~" Nikolai giggled, hands—that adorned red gloves that seemed so out of place with his outfit—momentarily covering his face. Laughter subsides quite easily and his face turns into horrifying seriousness—a thing you would never see on a clown. "Of course, we did discuss what exam could be perfect, hm? I know, I know. No fights, you said, but.. I've been longing for entertainment! I'm still rooting for the idea of either shoving him down the stairs to test his endurance or have him skin someone alive. The second one is very important!"
Chuuya's face visibly contorted with an awkward chuckle. His eye twitched as Nikolai brought up the dangerous ideas. "My boy won't need to skin anyone alive. Look at him! Gogol, this is no time for jokes. It's already getting late."
"But I'm made out of jokes!"
Chuuya can't help but let out a frustrated groan. Nikolai's presence exhausted him, at first it was good to have someone so light-hearted and entertaining—even if they did remind him of someone else—but now, as Nikolai's words start to transform into danger, it's not as funny.
Chuuya glanced towards Ryuunosuke, who stared off through the window at the dark sky. The sun had set, the day ending in a mournful cry from the heavens. The rain splattered against the windows, slowing down with time. Chuuya rubbed the bridge of his nose, sighing with clear irritation that slowly dissociated from him.
"Hm.." Nikolai tapped his chin, his eyes drifting from Chuuya to the window. It's as if he sniffed out Chuuya's worry. "He can do the exam tomorrow, I suppose."
Chuuya brightened up like the stars outside, a calm smile shone on his face. "Knew it. Ryuunosuke, here."
Saying this, he handed a key to Ryuunosuke. His gloved hand brushed against Ryuunosuke's cold, pale hand. Ryuunosuke observed the object carefully in his hand, moving it around and, with the help of the moonlight, deducted it must've fit a door meant for him. Or, rather, a door to a dorm meant for him.
"Ah, such a sweet moment!" Nikolai blurted out, a certain longing swirled in his eye—as if he was once in Chuuya's position. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry! I must be ruining it, aren't I? What a shame.."
Chuuya sighed, that bright smile still on his lips. "C'mon, you're just making it better, Gogol."
Ryuunosuke peered into Chuuya's smile. How warm it seemed, like the scorching sun, like a fireplace he saw once in his entire life—if he were to place his hands anywhere near Chuuya's smile, they would turn into dust! Ryuunosuke blinked, Chuuya's smile grew a little as he glanced towards Nikolai.
"You must be sleepy, eh?" Chuuya asked once they went outside the building. It's night, lone cars buzzed by racing to get home. The fresh air of rainwater wafted through the air, puddles filled most of the pavement, especially the spots with not so big holes. "Nikolai.. he's energetic alright."
"Yes," Ryuunosuke agreed after a moment. He walked next to Chuuya, his fingers itching to hold Chuuya's hand like they did when they were younger. "I thought they'd be.. different."
"More judgemental? Yeah, me too." Chuuya's fingers gently intertwined with Ryuunosuke's, his warm hand a stark contrast against Ryuunosuke's cold one. "They're.. good people. But.. yeah, it's obvious."
Ryuunosuke shyly turned his head away. Chuuya's gentle action stirred a great storm in Ryuunosuke, reminding him of the person he loved the most he unwillingly left behind. "Nakahara.." But he choose to not indulge in that topic he wanted to bring up. "Nevermind."
"You can tell me anything. And, remember, buddy, it's just Chuuya for you."
Walking under the bright street lamps, the height difference made them look a bit wonky. Yet, with the love a person has towards their sibling, Chuuya directed Ryuunosuke to a correct path, both to the dormitory and to life. Chuuya glanced up, heart aching with pride as a vision played before his eyes—Ryuunosuke Akutagawa, a detective, and Gin Akutagawa, his 'assistant'. But that's only a dream, with Gin not here...
"Chuuya, I think you'll be a great detective."
Ryuunosuke, as if sensing out Chuuya's conflict, murmured.
"It's too much of a honor for someone like me."