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-Spider-Trauma protocol*

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¨Hey…¨, Peter said, a bit awkwardly.

¨Hey Loser¨, MJ returned. 

Peter looked at the ground and MJ´s smile fell. 

¨Is everything okay?¨

Peter put on his best im okay face. ¨Yeah. I´m great. You know me. No matter what I'm going through, I always put a smile on my face. 

MJ looks at him with a knowing look, but Peter brushes her off. 

¨No seriously, I'm fine. I'm okay. I'm actually, really great.¨

¨You're not convincing at all Peter¨, She deadpanes. 

¨Well, I've been through a lot lately. You would never understand.¨

MJ´s heart flutters and a quick look of hurt flashes across her eyes, but Peter catches it before it disappears. 

¨ I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I didn't mean that. I'm sorry. Im…¨ Peter was a little flustered. 

¨It's fine…What's bothering you?¨

¨Nothing. Nothings bothering me. I swear.¨

¨Peter, you just snapped at me. That's bullshit and you know it.¨

¨I said I'm sorry! It... It's just… Everything a lot right now, okay? You wouldnt understand.¨

¨Peter, you won't even let me try!¨

¨You don't want to understand. No one understands¨ He said the last part so softly, MJ was sure she misheard him. 

¨I'm not just anyone, Peter. I'm your friend.¨

Peter falls silent, not knowing how to explain what's going on without giving away his identity. 

¨…Does it have something to do with-¨ she whispers in the last part. ¨- You know what.¨

¨I can't talk about it.¨

¨….I know your Spider-man. 

¨Peter is shocked and taken aback, trying to remain cool but failing horribly. 

¨What….?¨

¨Your Spider-man¨, MJ says simply. 

¨oh. You know. You knew the entire time?

She raises an eyebrow and nods. ¨Most of the time. You're not going to try and say you're not Spider-man?¨

¨….Im not Spider-man.¨

MJ blinks before doubling over in laughter. 

¨What's so funny?¨

¨ Well, which is it? Are you Spider-man or not because you can't be both.¨

¨I…uh…I¨, Peter tails off as he realizes how badly he slipped up. 

¨Just tell me, Peter¨, MJ says sternly. 

Peter pauses as he thinks about what to say before looking up and finally speaking. 

¨Yes…I'm Spider-man.¨

¨I KNEW IT!¨ She cheers. ¨Ned owes me 50 bucks.¨

¨Wait, so does this mean.. You´re not mad?¨

MJ turns to face him in confusion. ¨Why would I be mad?¨

¨Well..I mean, you didn't really like…freak out about it. 

¨Why would I?¨ She questions seriously. 

¨Uh…I don't know. I suppose because now that you know my secret identity, I could possible be putting you in danger if I take you out with me.¨

¨You're not putting us in danger, Peter¨, MJ frowns. 

¨I…I thought you'd be…mad?¨

¨Uh..no? It was kinda obvious,, Peter.¨

¨Um…so then.. You're really not mad?¨

¨No.¨

¨…You´re totally chill with it?¨

¨Yes! Peter, I'm okay with you being Spider-man!¨

¨…you are?¨

¨Bro. It's not my choice if you do this or not.¨

¨You don't want me to..stop?¨

¨Peter¨, MJ looks at him. 

¨…Yeah?¨

¨Shut up. Stop questioning it.¨

¨But I just need to make sure!¨

I am 100% sure i'm not mad at you for protecting other people and making sure people get home safe.¨

¨So…you don't want me to stop?¨ Peter questioned for the hundredth father fucking time. 

¨That is a stupid thing for me to be mad about. So no, I don't care if you stop or not.¨

¨But you know I'm putting you in danger by doing this?¨

MJ stared at him. 

¨I just want to make sure you understand the possible danger you´d be in by being with me when I do Spider´man…things.¨

MJ cuts him off with her hand. ¨One, you blabbering. Two, I know how to defend myself. I was taught by black widow. And three, you don't need to worry about Ned and I all the time.¨

¨…You were taught by black widow?¨

¨…I guess I figured you didn't know¨, MJ shrugged. 

¨Yeah. No¨

¨Remember the field trip to SI?¨

¨I do.¨

¨You remember when we went down to the training room?¨

¨Yeah¨, Peter responds slowly. 

¨And the Avengers wanted to embarrass you by making you show-off during training?¨

Peter´s face goes red, remembering the embarrassment of that field trip. MJ smirks, seeing his face. 

¨and I took your place instead?¨

¨You…you did?¨

She gives him a look. ¨…Alright, to be fair, you were out of it a bit. When you left to use the bathroom, I beat the fuck out of flash.¨

¨You did what?" Peter asked with a bewildered look on his face, as if he didn't hear her correctly. 

¨I beat the fuck out of Flash¨, MJ repeated with a smug look on her face. 

¨You beat up Flash Thompson? Weren't you like…six years old at the time?¨

…

¨Peter..¨ MJ gives him a concerned glance. ¨…That was last month.¨

Peter´s mouth dropped in shock. Last month? He could have sworn it was all those years ago. 

¨What field trip when I was six? Peter! I didn't even know you!

Peter was still processing what she said. ¨How old are you?¨

¨…Yeah, okay. Something is wrong with you. I'm 15, Peter. Are you feeling okay?¨

¨Uh…yeah¨, he gulped. ¨I just….need to take a breath. 

¨Peter, you forgot my age.¨

¨…You´re right, I did. 

¨..I'm calling Tony.¨ MJ reached for her cell phone.

¨WH-Wait! No. I'm fine!¨

¨No you're not!¨, she shot back. 

¨MJ, listen to me. I'm fine, I promise! I'm just a tad bit, forgetful right now..¨

¨Yeah, no.¨

¨Please. Just-just dont tell Mr. Stark.¨

¨Fine..¨, she sighs. ¨But tell me what's bothering you.¨

¨Um…I think I'd rather just- not talk about it?¨

MJ pulls out her cell phone again, waving it in Peter´ś face. ¨We just went over this Peter. Tell me right now or I'm calling Tony.¨

Peter thinks about telling her, and knows he won't be able to hide forever. Taking a deep  breath, he eventually decides to explain to her what's been weighing him down recently. MJ listens to his story with full attention. Her heart skips a beat when Peter tells him about the building. 

A little later, he finally finishes telling her his story and how he's been feeling for the past few months. MJ is looking at him like a fish out of water. 

¨…What the fuck!...¨

¨…Yeah…¨

¨A building fell on you Peter!¨

¨I was fine though!¨

¨Fine!¨ MJ raised her voice. ¨FUCK PETER YOU COULD HAVE BEEN CRUSHED!¨

Peter tries to keep his head calm and speak slowly and calmly to avoid the oncoming headache. 

¨Well, I wasn't crushed, okay? I was fine.¨

¨Physically, maybe? It doesn't matter. It still could have happened.¨

¨I KNOW THAT!¨ Peter seethed. 

¨Does Tony know? The Avengers?¨

Peter hesitantly shakes his head no. 

MJ clicks her tongue to her mouth.

¨What's my name, Peter?¨

¨…MJ?¨

¨Where are you right now?¨

¨….Your bedroom.¨

MJ stills. They were in the fucking training room. 

¨Yeah, no. Friday? Alert Tony. Protocol Spider-Trauma.¨

¨Spider- Trauma?¨

MJ looks at him as she walks over silently. She holds Peter´s wrist. He realizes what she's doing and tries to wriggle free. 

¨Something is wrong with Peter. Tell Stark to get his ass here now Friday!¨

Protocol Spider-Trauma initiated. Boss has been notified. 

¨Please, Mj, it's not that bad-¨, Peter tried to say, but MJ cut him off. 

¨You keep forgetting things. You're disoriented. This isn't you, Peter. Something is wrong and I intend to find out.¨

Peter´s eyes go wide in surprise as Tony opens the door. He looks around, frazzled, before his eyes land on the two. MJ speaks first. 

¨Something is wrong with peter. He keeps forgetting things. He thought the SI field trip was when we were six.¨

Peter looks at her in shock, his heart starts racing as he realizes how bad it sounds. 

¨He thought we were in my bedroom for christ sake. Were in the tower and this is the fucking training room!¨

Peter freezes at that, remembering that they are in-fact not in MJ´s bedroom. 

Tony raises an eyebrow, now realizing the severity of the situation as he states to Peter. Tony walks over to the boy, ignoring his protests, and scoops him up bridal style. He turns to the ceiling. 

¨Friday dear? Please alert the other Avengers and have Cho meet me in the med-bay.¨

Peter tries to move out from Tony´s grip but fails miserably as he starts panicking. 

¨No..n…no…NO..LET ME GO.¨ 

He starts hyperventilating as the elevator makes its way down. Tony´s eyes widen and MJ tries to calm Peter down. 

Peter is screaming bloody murder and trying to free himself from Tony´s grip, but nothing is working. The elevator doors open and the Avengers rush to help Tony. Peter is still flailing. His screams get louder as the Avengers finally restrain him while also trying to keep him as calm as possible. 

…

Then MJ realizes what Peter must be seeing. Peter suddenly gets dead silent and stops yelling as he stares at MJ, maybe realizing she knows. Her eyes soften and she smiles at Peter. But he doesn't respond. Instead, he walks towards the wall, sits down, and covers his ears. Peter looks up at her. He sits there, completely motionless, but not long before he trembles while still covering his ears. 

Something clicks in Natasha´s mind. ¨He's having a mental overload; or a panic attack.¨

Peter starts muttering to himself, covering his ears and trying to block out everyone around him while he keeps shaking. He can hear people speaking. 

¨Pe…Pet…Ar…you…kay?¨

It's too much on his ears, and he lets out a sob. He starts sobbing and hugging his head, unable to hear what anyone is saying anymore. He can feel hands grasp his own as they take his hands off his head. He must have been gripping his hair and didn't even realize it. He tried to get his hands free to go back to his head. Peter slowly looks up, tears still welling in his eyes. His breathing slowly becomes more controlled. Tony kneels down to be eye level with him. 

¨Peter.¨

Peter stares up at him, blinking, still breathing a bit heavily. He slowly nods his head. Tony breathes out a sigh of relief. Peter lets out a silent whimper and the Avengers freeze. Bruce holds up a finger to his lips and motions for everyone except Tony to follow him. The Avengers slowly walk away. They follow Bruce to a backroom with ample space. Natasha closes the door behind them to allow Peter and Tony privacy. 

Peter stares at the floor, slowly calming down. Tony holds onto his hands and looks at him, concerned. Tony doesn't speak though, scared of hurting Peter. 

The boy starts shaking a bit again, but he tries to stop himself. Tony watches him to make sure he doesn't overstimulate again. 

Tony looks down at Peter for a bit, he stays silent for a few beats of his own before finally speaking as softly as he can. 

¨Peter?¨ The boy looks at him. ¨Can I ask you something.¨

Peter whimpers. He nods and Tony continues. 

¨Can you tell me what you saw?¨ he asks gently. 

Peter whines and shakes his head. Tony takes a deep breath before trying again. 

¨ Can you tell me…what you felt?¨

Peter ever so gently lifts his head up from his knees. 

¨…Alone…¨

Tony goes silent as his heart breaks. He takes a moment before speaking again. 

¨Do you feel alone right now?¨ Tony keeps his eyes transfixed on Peter. Peter closes his eyes for a moment before responding. 

¨I…Im always alone..¨

Tony´s heart breaks more as he realizes the severity of Peter´s condition. He holds him close, giving him a small but loving hug. Peter leans into it, putting his head on Tony´s chest. He closes his eyes and listens to his mentor´s headbeat, helping him calm down. 

Back with the Avengers, MJ starts to explain what happened. 

¨He then told me that the SI field trip was when I was six, not last month.¨

The Avengers all glanced at each other, concerned and worried about what MJ was saying. Bruce´s eyes go wide to what she just said. 

¨Six. He didn't even know you when you were six, MJ.¨ Bruce was speechless, staring at her as Natasha looked even more concerned. A moment of silence passes, until Thor pipes up. 

¨He has been forgetting a lot of things lately…¨

¨Like what?¨ Clint asks. 

MJ and Thor quickly go over what they witnessed happen in the past few months, explaining to the Avengers all the times Peter forgot important events. Everyone now looked more and more concerned. 

¨Peter forgot that Loki was coming to visit once, which he never forgets.¨

¨And you´re only telling us now?¨ Clint crosses his arms. 

¨Lots of people forget things, I figured he was just saying some off days¨, Thor shrugged. 

Bruce was still staring, a bit shocked at the fact that Mj didn't say anything sooner. 

¨ You´re telling us that Peter has been forgetting things about his life for months and you didn't think to tell us?¨

MJ stared him down. He shot her a small apologetic look. 

¨You all didn't either. How do you think I figured out Peter's secret?¨

¨You know he is Spider-Man?¨ Natasha speaks up. They all turnt to look at MJ. 

¨Well duh. He's not that good at keeping that secret. Everyone at school is just dumb.¨

Clint sighs. ¨yeah.. You're not wrong. Most students don't even know what the hell is going on half the time anyway.¨

Bruce clears his throat. ¨We are getting off topic. Sam?¨ He turns to the man. ¨You're a licensed therapist in the trauma field. What is going on with Peter?¨ Bruce ignores Bucky grumble about his 7 PHDs. 

Sam takes a deep breath, trying to collect all of his thoughts. 

¨Okay. He's been forgetting things, and he has been feeling alone. This could be a sign that he's developing some sort of trauma, or depression, or…¨

¨or???¨ MJ questions, her heart beating faster. 

¨Or…something that's causing him to forget about his past. Possibly, if it's left untreated, it could lead him from dissociating from his memories entirely.¨

Steave and Sam shared an uneasy glance, looking at Bucky. Bucky looked towards the ground. 

¨Which means he would basically start to feel like his life didn't actually happen, feeling disconnected to his past and his memories. That would explain why he's feeling so lonely…because he has started to disconnect from his memories.¨

Sam nodded. ¨Bucky is right. However, we don´t know for sure.¨

¨Yeah, it's all just…conjecture right now. But if this is happening, then we need to act soon.¨

The Avengers all nodded. They decided to get back to Peter and Tony.

Peter is sitting in his arms, his head still buried into Tony's chest, not even attempting to look at anyone. Tony strokes his hair and rubs the back of his head, doing everything he can to have Peter stay calm and feel safe. 

The Avengers share a look and MJ comes forward. She looks at Tony, as if asking if it's okay. Tony nods so she walks over to sit down next to Peter. Peter doesn't seem to notice Mj sitting down, and he just continues to tremble, not moving his head from Tony´s chest. Friday sends a ping to everyone's phones, so as to not scare Peter. Though, knowing his enhanced hearing, he probably could guess. 

Peter stays still, trembling, as Tony continues to soothe him. The Avengers take out their phones and look at the ping. 

Peter´s heart rate is slowing down. He will most likely fall asleep. Afterwards, I suggest someone carefully carry him to bed. 

Peter´s body relaxes as his heart rate slows and his breathing becomes calm and regular. He slowly drifts off to sleep with his head still buried into Tony. The Avengers put their phones away and watch over the two. Steve takes Peter from Tony and gently cradles him in his arms. The boy looks so small as he's put on the med-bay bed. Peter looks utterly peaceful as he sleeps, his hands tucked under his chest as he lets out a soft exhale, a small smile on his face as he dreams about something happy. 

Tony looks over at Mj and they both sigh in relief. Pepper comes quietly walking over, motioning for the Avengers to follow. Tony wanted to stay with Peter, though. The other Avengers follow her as they file out of the room. Tony glances one more time at Peter, watching as he sleeps peacefully, his face still holding onto that smile even as he sleeps. He whispers something to Peter, though no one can hear what he's saying.

They all walk out and follow Pepper to the elevator. Steve turns to Tony. 

¨He will be fine, Tony. MJ will keep him safe. Friday, if MJ finds something out, send her up and have Cho watch Peter.¨

Friday responds but Tony doesn't hear. He doesn't respond to Steve's reassurance either, but he nods his head. Though, he continues to stare back to the room, not taking his eyes off of Peter even for a second. The elevator door closes, and Friday takes them up to the common room. 

The common room fills up with the Avengers and Pepper. Bruce clears his throat.

¨Okay. I think we know what's going on with Peter, but how about we explain exactly what is it so that everyone understands.¨ 

They all nod and turn to Sam. He opens his mouth to speak. 

¨Over the past few months, Peter has forgotten things. Things like when tests are or that he has homework. He has forgotten conversations or how to take care of himself. He even forgot when Loki was coming once.¨ Everyone grimaced. ¨Today, he and Mj were in the training room. Peter thought the SI field trip happened when they were six, and they didn't even know each other then. He forgot her age too, as well as what room they were in.¨

Bruce crosses his arms and leans back on his chair. ¨As Sam said before, this could be a sign that he's developing some sort of trauma, or depression, or something else that is causing him to disconnect with his memories and his memories of his past. It could lead him to feeling totally disconnected from those around him and cause him to…¨ He paused for a moment. ¨To lose the will to live if left untreated.¨

Their hearts clenched, understanding washing through them. 

Bruce pauses for a beat before looking around, making sure everyone understands.

¨Right now, he's in the early stages. But if this goes untreated, it could become much worse.¨

¨So what do we do?¨ Pepper questions. 

¨We must find the cause first, so we can treat the symptoms. If we don't, then the trauma will keep re-triggering, and he won't be able to get better. It's simple but we all know that just saying it, and actually doing something about it are two completely different things¨, Sam responds. Tony was about to add something when Friday spoke. 

Boss, MJ is currently on her way up here. She says she forgot about something.

Bruce looks at the ceiling, then abc at all the people in the room. 

¨MJ forgot…something?¨

Just then, the elevator dinged and Mj came running out in terror. The avengers stare at her and immediately notice the look on her face. Their hearts skip another beat as they watch her frantically look around the room and speak in a panicked voice.

¨Pet-Peter-her..her..Mhmmm.¨ She goes almost non verbal in her panic. Natasha walks over to her and puts a hand on her shoulder. 

¨Breathe, MJ.¨

MJ takes in deep breaths as she tries to stop the panic from taking over, though she's still trembling. Her heart is still beating rapidly. 

¨Th…The building!¨

The Avengers just state at her, not knowing what shes talking about. No one can really piece together, but she appears to be panicking about something that their not quite sure of. Pepper raises an eyebrow. Bucky  looks away, trying to keep his composure. Tony is staring at her with a scared look. Steve puts his hands out in a calming gesture. Bruce and Thor cross their arms. Nat looks at her, worried.

¨What are you talking about, MJ? What building?¨ Clint questions. 

MJ takes another deep breath, not looking at anyone. She can feel the panic building up again, which leads to her shaking, She tries to speak but only manages to get out a few words.

¨The vulture…and the building!

Tony froze. The vulture was something he nor Peter ever talked about. It scared him, what could have happened to Peter. It appears, something did happen. 

The Avengers continue to stare at her, trying to piece together what shes talking about. A moment of silence passes before Tony finds his voice. He speaks, but his voice is filled with worry, fear, and concern as he looks at her. 

¨MJ, what happened with the vulture?¨

MJ pauses for a moment before tears start to stream down her face. 

¨It…the building.¨ She gulps. ¨It fell on top of him. 

…

It was so silent, you could hear a pin drop. Hearts skipped a beat in shock and worry as MJ cried. They all stare at her in horror. Bruce´s eyes go wide as he starts to put it together. Friday looks through the security feeds of that night. 

She lands on one. It was a warehouse. There were men with alien guns everywhere. In a sudden movement, Peter comes crashing through a window. The footage is a little grainy. The Avengers watch as they see Peter crash to the ground. He's visibly shaken and covered in dirt. His breathing is heavy and his hands are trembling uncontrollably, but that doesn't stop him. He pushes past the men with alien guns, fighting them. Running around the warehouse while people fight after him, Peter scans the surrounding area looking for something. He eventually finds the edge of something, but he's not fully in view of the feed. Peter is thrown around more before he can launch whatever he grabs. The sound of creeks came through the footage. The sound of the warehouse breaking as the Vulture flies around, destroying support beams. . The vulture turns to Peter and mutters something. The Avengers could barely make out what it is, but they can hear it. 

¨Because I want you to understand. And…I needed a little time to get her airborne. 

The camera feeds cut off the moment the building starts to collapse and fall. The Avengers stare at the footage in shock, not really knowing what to make of it. They stay silent for a beat of their own before they finally speak. 

¨He…he survived something like that?¨

MJ nods. The feed was still playing. They could hear Peter screaming for help-

For Tony´s help

¨Where is Peter now?¨ Tony asks. ¨Who is he with? Cho?

MJ nods. Sam clears his throat, having a possible answer. 

¨When someone experiences a traumatic event, they may have dissociative memory loss, meaning they don´t remember anything that happened when they were experiencing the trauma. They may also experience dissociative identity disorder, where they subconsciously block out the experience. In Peter´s case, I believe it is the latter. Meaning that all this time, over the course of these past months, Peter was basically bottling up his trauma. However, Dissociative memory loss may explain why he has been forgetting things. 

¨And if he was experiencing a traumatic event, then he would've gone to someone who would make him feel safe¨, Bruce adds.

¨Which is us¨. Clint mutters. 

The Avengers all nod their heads. 

¨Yes. Which is us.¨

¨So what now?¨ Pepper asks. 

¨If what we are all observing is correct, then Peter is currently in a state of dissociative memory loss. In this state, he will forget things or not remember them due to the trauma he is experiencing¨, Sam responds. 

Nat raises her hand. ¨But he will forget everything in a few days, and it's basically just temporary?¨

Sam hesitates, grimacing. ¨It could get worse overtime. We won't know for certain. 

Sam´s words fill the room with silence. They all exchange worried looks as she speaks. They all have their own concerns about the possibility of things getting worse overtime. 

¨We need to help him as soon as possible, otherwise, the effect of the trauma could linger with him for a long time. You´re all aware of how difficult it's been for him lately. How he's been acting. We can't afford to let this go for any longer without treating him.¨

The avengers agree and make their way back to the elevator. MJ follows as well, behind Pepper. 

Its a brief but quiet ride down. Bruce, Steve, and Tony are standing quietly in the elevator and are all thinking about Peter. Steve can tell Tony is still extremely worried about Peter. About his kid. He wishes he knew what happened to cause Peter to now tell anyone. Bruce, on the other hand, is thinking about how this could mean there's something else Peter isn't telling them, and how the Vulture is just connected in a way none of them knew. Tony is just thinking about Peter, worried and frustrated. 

The elevator stopped and they all got out, making their way where Cho was waiting outside. She looked calm. Tony takes a deep breath before he finally opens his mouth.

¨Cho?¨

She smiles at him. ¨ He's resting.¨

Tony pauses for a moment before he nods, as if he knows that's not the whole answer. He can help but feel paranoid about the whole situation. There's so much that doesn't add up. Like why Peter didn't just talk to them. Just tell them about the building. It sounds like Peter, but he doesn't want it to. 

Tony is aware that his anxiety about this is increasing. There's something that's just…bugging him about it. He can't put his whole hand on it, which only heightens his anger with the unknown. 

Pepper notices and grabs his hand, offering him a smile. 

He seems surprised by her action, but he calms down a little. Her touch reminds him of something that makes him feel warm and safe. He squeezes her hand. Cho lets Tony,  Pepper, and Mj go first. 

Tony follows along, as he looks around the empty room. It's quite, which he should like, but it just feels..wrong. He doesn't know why. He finds it hard to trust the quietness. Pepper and Mj are just behind him. He can feel MJ tugging at his shirt sleeve, but he doesn't look over to her. Instead Tony is looking at Peter. His breath hitches. He still looks so peaceful, sleeping. 

Tony doesn't budge. He just stares, watching Peter´s breath go quiet and calm, listening to the soft sounds of his heart beating in his chest. There's something about watching him sleep that soothes him, (in a non weird way) yet at the same time makes his mind wander and go crazy with thoughts. 

What if what Bruce said is right?

What if Peter ends up ending his life thanks to him?

But it's like Pepper can read his mind. She whispers to him. ¨It's not your fault, Tony.¨

Tony flinches a little bit when she speaks softly to him, but he immediately tries to hide that fact. He's aware that she knows him so well that she can pick up when something is wrong. She always could. He whispers back to her a second later. 

¨I know it's not my fault. But I just feel like there's something I'm missing. I just can't shake that feeling. It's so…it's so frustrating!¨ Tony seems to get more angry. 

¨I know, Honey. But as of right now, all we can do is be there for him Jumping the gun will just scare him away.¨

Tony is silent for a beat. He wants to argue with her, but he can't find the right words to do it. She's right. As much as he wants to do something for the kid right now, he can't because if he does, things could potentially get worse for everyone. 

Then, Tony remembers MJ is here. Finally looking at her, his eyes shatter with worry. She looks on the verge of passing out. 

NOT TONY/MJ FUCKING HELL DON'T BE WEIRD

His attention immediately goes to her as he looks at her intently. He can feel the frustration and concern and anger in his chest swell when he sees her like this; shaking, trembling, nonverbal. Tony can't help but get angry at himself with how useless he feels right now, and the fact that someone else may have caused this anger to fester inside of him more. He can feel himself shaking a bit as well. 

Pepper takes both of their hands, and against their protests, leads them out of the rooms. The Avengers are all in the waiting room, waiting their turns. They watch as Pepper drags a kicking Mj and Tony to the chairs. Mj is trying to break out of Pepper´s grip, but she's strong. She's kicking her legs and is now throwing a full on temper tantrum. She's non-verbal and seems to be panicking as she thrashes around. As for Tony, he's not fighting it, instead he's just letting Pepper lead him along. He's got a thousand yard stare as Pepper takes them across the room. 

Bucky and Natasha take their chance to see Peter. As they walk away, Mj falls silent. She lets out a choked sob.

MJ continues to sob as she tries to calm down. She's trembling and can feel her breath coming out faster and quicker with no end in sight. Her eyes are filling up and she's trying her hardest not to cry. Eventually, as she's trying to catch her breath, her lips begin to tremble again, and her whole face starts too. She's trying to stop crying, but it's becoming clear that the pressure is building up too fast. She wants someone to comfort her, but she's too far gone right now to speak. 

Pepper starts reassuring Mj that she's okay and just to try and calm her down as she rubs her back. All the while, Mj's lips are trembling and she's starting to sob again. The poor girl is clearly having a full blown panic attack, with no end in sight. The Avengers look on, some seeming a bit worried, others seeming a bit uncomfortable. Tony sits there and just watches this play out. He watches her break down, and he just can't help but feel helpless. He hates seeing her like this, broken and scared. 

Peter is his son, but MJ is a part of this family too. As is Ned, Speaking of Ned, he needs to know what's happening with Peter. Tony knows that, but at the same time, he struggles with it. He's aware that Ned is closer to Peter. He's aware that he's not Peter´s only family. He's aware of the fact that people like MJ and Ned are important people in Peter's life, and that he should do more as his father to also include them in his life as well. But he just struggles with the concept of being a full-time father. 

He isn't even sure Peter sees him that way. Tony has always gotten that vibe from Peter. The kid never really acts like he sees Tony as a proper father figure. It always felt like Peter was his own person and he was just…there. Peter never called tony ´dad´ with full honestly or with true sincerity like the other kids did with their parents. But that's a very small detail, so there's no point in overthinking it. After all, Peter isn't his actual son. And Tony isn't his actual dad. But he cant not love Peter like a son. I mean, its Peter! What's not to love?

Tony knows that Peter is far from perfect. He dows things that annoy him. He does things that piss him off. But he also knows that the kid is still growing up. And he loves that about him. The fact that the kid still shows his innocence and his naivety. Theres always a chance to improve and get better and learn and thats what Tony always hopes happens for the kid, but only through natural means such as growing and maturing of course. 

A pit forms in his stomach at the thought of the Vulture. The fact that he took Peter’s suit away from him, the very suit that could have stopped him from getting stuck under a building. Tony could have saved him then. Peter wouldnt be in this mess. And that thought terrifies Tony to no end. The thought that he could have saved him. The thought that Peter is in this mess because of him. The thought that he failed as a father to the kid he was supposed to protect. It just….crushes him inside. It just fills him with guilt about everything that has happened, and about everythinf that is currently happening. He feels like he let the kid down. 

Tony, lost in his thoughts, almost doenst realize a hand brushing hair out of his face. He looks up to see Pepper. She continues to brush his hair back and give him an understanding smile. Tony sighs in relief. He closes his eyes, and against his better judgment, falls asleep. 

Pepper looks over at him, seeing how drained he is. She lets out a smile as she looks at him, and she whispers to herself. 

“Rest up, you deserve it.”

She then turns to the others. “You guys too. Go to sleep. You will need it.” 

They all slowly get up one by one, and leave. They head back up to get some rest as Cho begins her scans again. 

“Go to bed after this Cho. Have a nurse take the night shift.”

Cho gives a quick nod before she returns her attention to the scanner shes operating. She seems extremely focused on making sure Peter’s vitals are fine. 

Then Pepper’s attention turns back to MJ. She thought about waking thr girl up, but no. She needs her rest as well. Plus, MJ is leaning on Tony’s shoulder and its fucking adorable. 

Theres warmth inside of Pepper as she sees MJ leaning on Tony. She cant help but smile briefly. Tony was always one of the kindest peoplle she ever knew, so hee seeing him being this caring and soft towards MJ warms her heart. She knows how much the kid means to him. 

“All his kids,” she thought. Then she left to find Ned. If he wasnt going to pick up his phone, them she would go to him. 

And so, the hospital became still. Slowly but surely, everyone left the room except dor the nurses and Cho, as they continued to make their monitors blink and beep, and the sound of machines running was all that was heard in the room. It would be a while longer before MJ or Tony woke up, amd neither od the two would any time soon. Both were just exhausted. 

The next morning, everyone arrives bright and early to see the two still asleep. Neither of them have moved from their place. Mj still has her head on Tony’s shoulder, while he has his arm wrapped around her. They are like father and daughter and its so cute. As they file into the waiting room, Tony shifts and slowly opens his eyes. 

MJ stays asleep, but Tony begins to adapt to the light after closing his eyes for sp long. The first thinf he sees is Pepper as shes walking towards him, followed by the rest of the Avengers. Hes a bit disorented right now. As he blinks to get himself awake. 

He looks down at her, noting how pale she is, and how she still seems to be trembling ever so slightly, like she was just in the midst of having a nightmare. However, she’s breathing fine and she seems to be resting peacefully for the most part. Tony smiles ever so slightly at her peacefully sleeping. Cho and Bruce are smiling as they walk into the room, and then their smiles become a bit warmer when they see Tony and MJ together, with MJ resting her head on him. It’s a sweet and heartwarming scene, despite everything that’s going on. Pepper walks over to the chair and take MJ into her lap, giving Tony a break. Banner tells everyone he has good news

Tony looks from MJ in Pepper’s arms to Bruce. He seems curious to know what the news is. There’s always so much uncertainty with everything that Peter has gone through recently, so it could be nice to get some good news for once. It might make him feel at ease for a while. He looks back at Bruce, slightly leaning forward in his chair so that he’s in a more engaged position.

“Peter has been sleeping well. There were no spikes in his heart rate, saved for one this morning. The body does that sometimes, so it should be fine.”

Tony seems a bit surprised by hearing this. There was something this morning? Just one, though? A bit unusual, but Tony decides to not overthink it for now. Either way, it’s good to hear that Peter was otherwise sleeping well, which means his vitals were fine. He nods his head and looks to Bruce, waiting for him to say more.

Cho takes a second to get her stuff ready before she starts talking. “Okay, well… his vitals are all good… and his body is…” She starts listing a long list of different things that seem to all be fine… but-“  Then she stops and sighs.”There is…something..”

Tony and everyone else present listens eagerly, anticipating what she’s going to say next. Then she stops and sighs again, like she doesn’t know how to continue. Tony looks at her carefully. A bit of worry starts to build up inside of him, but he just listens intently instead of interrupting.

She grimaces. “Its…his arms.”

The worry inside of Tony starts to get stronger as his face gets slightly more anxious. Everyone’s attention is now focused on Cho and her next words.

“And his legs. Jesus, they are all over his body.”  The horror is evident on her face.

The worry suddenly jumps to pure panic inside of Tony. He immediately jerks his head up and starts frantically looking around the room at everyone.

“They’re… all over his body? What do you mean they’re all over his body?”

“The…the scars Tony.”

The look of horror that was present on Cho’s face only intensifies, making everyone else in the room shift in their seats and feel even more worried. Tony’s face is suddenly filled with fear as well, as he slowly says to Cho:

“So you’re telling me there are scars… all over his body?”

She nods hesitantly. “ Y-you said I building fell on top of him?”

And that’s when Tony fully realizes just what happened. He slowly begins to realize everything. Peter was in the rubble the whole time. Peter got stuck. Peter got buried. Peter saw everything.

“… you’re telling me… the body is covered in scars… because Peter’s body was trapped under that building for all that time, and he had no way to get out…and..he was fighting the Vulture…”

Bruce nodded with tears in his eyes.

Tony stares at both Bruce and Cho, his breath starting to become more staggered and his eyes are starting to well up with moisture. It’s like his worst nightmare just happened to his kid. He is completely horrified. His body is shaking a bit.

They hear a creek near the elevator and they all stop. Ned looks at them with genuine fear. Fear for Peter.

Tony looks over to Ned as he shows up. When Tony sees the state that the kid is in, his entire face turns pale. His mouth is agape, his eyebrows are raised, and his eyes are wide, filled with worry.

Just the sight of Ned fills him with worry alone. Tony knows that Ned cares about Peter. But to see him scared, scared in a way that Tony has never seen before… that makes things 100times worse.

“Ned…I…”, Bucky starts, but falls short. How do they explain the building, or the panic attacks?

*Tony continues to stare at Ned, as everyone else looks at Tony, waiting for him to say something. The silence and the dread in the air is palpable, especially for all the Avengers. They’re worried and scared for the kid, scared because of what happened to him, and scared at the thought of what Ned could be so afraid of.

 Ned is the first to break the silence. He turns to MJ, eyes widening at how pale she is.

MJ continues to rest her head on Pepper’s lap, as Pepper looks at her with concern. But as MJ’s eyes slowly open, she looks up to see Ned, and she looks pretty out of it right now. She blinks once, twice, three times, trying to clear her vision. She seems a bit dazed right now.

“N-..Ned?”

Ned is a bit startled by MJ saying his name, but the look on his face is one of worry and concern. He takes a few steps towards her, looking down at her.

“Yeah, MJ..im right here….Pepper got me.”

MJ looks up at him, and her face is still mostly devoid of any expression. She looks exhausted, and confused. Her eyelids are still heavy, and she’s looking up at Ned as she speaks in a very tired voice.

“Why is everyone… here?”

“Do you know where you are, sweetheart?” Pepper spoke in a soft tone. 

MJ slowly blinks, and she looks around. She’s still tired, but it seems like the sleep is slowly wearing off her. She’s still slightly drowsy, but she’s starting to be more aware of her surroundings. She still looks at Pepper, though, wanting to know why she called her “sweatheart” before looking over to the rest of the folks that are present.

Wait but- A look of realization dawned across her face. Peter. She trembles and gets up, trying to go to him. She falls though, tripped over her own two feet. Ned catches her, and she falls to the ground crying

Ned catches MJ as she starts crying, and she leans her head on his chest. He holds her and gently rubs her back in a comforting way as she cries. Everyone else looks over at her, and they all start approaching her. Steve steps forward and puts an arm around her, and she leans into his shoulder as she continues to cry.

“I want…i-i…want Peter to be okay!” She sobs out.

Everyone there looks at each other, with worried and sad looks on their faces. It’s so painful to see her like that. She clearly loves Peter so much. She’s so worried about him… just hearing her cry about Peter breaks their hearts. That’s when she feels someone’s hand gently fall on her shoulder.

MJ looks up, surprised to see Tony. He speaks. “I want to see him too, maybe we can do that together. Yeah?”

MJ slowly nods her head. She’s slowly starting to warm back up to him. She wants to see Peter… she really really wants to see Peter. She nods her head again, this time with much more energy than before. She wants to see him together, with Tony. Just the thought of the both of them seeing Peter together and being there for each other is enough to put a slight smile on MJ’s face.

Tony looks at Ned and Natasha pulls him aside. They wait as she explains stuff to him. Their hearts break when Ned’s eyes well up with tears. Natasha speaks to him gently, and hands him off to Tony. Tony, Ned, and MJ walk and they follow each other to Peter’s room.

And when they get to Peter’s room, the three of them look at Peter, who is still resting. Tony sees that the scars are clearly all over Peter’s body, as his hands and arms are tightly wrapped around his chest. That’s how he’d stayed the entire time that he was in that rubble. He was scared… and now everybody else is scared for him too.

He was now in a gown, which he had a long sleeve and pants on before. Why ddint they notice before? The long clothes, it was so obvious. Damnit

They didn’t notice because they weren’t fully paying attention, and they were focusing on Cho’s scans of the viticals from earlier. Even though it was obvious, their mind was somewhere else. Tony’s heart is still beating so fast as he looks at Peter, who’s covered in the scars and all wrapped in the gown. He doesn’t know what else to say. His mouth is wide open, but no words come out of it. He can only look down at Peter, who was just peacefully sleeping… for now.

Just then, the Avengers came into the room, waiting for something.

They all wait, and nobody says anything. Pepper holds MJ's hand tightly, as she tries to comfort her friend. Steve keeps his arm around her, while Natasha stands off to the side. The rest of the folks, Tony and Ned especially, are just staring at Peter. Tony is also trying to keep MJ from panicking again, as he gently holds her other hand with his, while Ned is just trying to take in everything.

Peter starts to shift, much to Tony’s surpise. The boy makes a noise and opens his eyes, adjusting to the light.

Everyone looks at Peter as he shifts around. It’s a bit startling, but Tony still manages to keep his cool. Tony is trying to smile and appear not scared, but it’s pretty obvious. He’s trying to keep MJ from freaking out again, while trying to keep the rest of the folks calm as well. Peter’s breathing pattern changes, getting a little faster as he takes in more oxygen. His breaths get a bit higher pitched and audible. MJ looks even more startled, but Steve puts a hand on her shoulder to calm her.

Once adjusted to the light, Peter looks around, seeing the Avengers, Ned, and MJ. Hes confused, and looks at Cho for guidance.

Cho is right beside him, and she gently touches his shoulder to let him know that she’s there. She speaks to him, trying to explain things as gently as possible, while Steve rubs MJ’s shoulder calmly.

Peter looks at Mj, looking apologetic. Looking like he knows what he did. Hes sorry about being crushed by a building? Thats fucking stupid.

Peter keeps looking at her with a small, apologetic smile. He doesn’t know how to explain things, but he seems genuinely sorry that she was so worried. He starts to shift in his bed again, before he moves towards her. MJ’s eyes widen a bit as she sees him try to come towards her, and everyone is a bit startled by this movement for a split second. However, Peter stops before he can reach her, seeming like he remembers something.

Cho moves to get him back into bed, but Peter stops her. He looks down at his body. His bruised and scarred body, that everyone else has now seen.

“Y-you…uhm…know..then?” Peter trembles.

Cho nods with a quiet “uh huh”. Everyone else is just staring at Peter and looking at his reactions to everything right now. His body is just in complete disarray. Peter feels self-conscious, as he slowly tries to get comfortable in the bed with the movements that he is allowed to make. He’s looking around the room again now, trying to process how they all saw him. Everyone in the room continues to stare, as Peter just keeps fidgeting with his hands.

Pepper sighs “Alright, everyone. Stop staring at him.” She scolds them while Peter turns his attention to Ned.

Ned is staring at him too, although in a much kinder way than the rest of everyone else. Peter can see that, and it makes his self conscious-ness go down by just the smallest degree, as he looks up at Ned. Ned is staring at him a little intently though, and he speaks to Peter, but Peter can’t understand the words. Everything sounds like it comes out as a garbled mess. Everything aside from his eyes though… his eyes seem filled with sympathy and sorrow.

“Why..why didnt you tell me, Peter?”

Peter stares at Ned, trying to explain something. He’s trying to convey something without saying it out loud… he just wants to know and understand and not be a burden…

Tony looks at him with knowing eyes:  none of this is your fault. Dont you dare say that it is.

Peter tries to look away, but he’s trying to suppress the urge to do so. He wants to avoid their gaze. He wants to avoid the stares. He wants to avoid... everyone. He wants to bury himself in a hole and disappear. He wants to make sure that no one ever needs to worry about him ever again. He slowly looks up at Tony. The guilt inside of him is killing him. And he can’t do that to himself anymore.

I-..” Bruce stops him “..maybe its best if some of us leave.”

Peter’s eyes are filled with sadness, as he looks at the whole group that’s now gathered in the room with him. He’s trying not to burst into tears, as the overwhelming sense of guilt continues to seep into his mind. He just wants to be alone right now. He just wants to hide away, and it seems that everyone else is trying to catch on to that. So, slowly, everyone starts leaving the room. All except for Peter, Ned, Pepper, Cho, MJ, and Tony.

The group left, minus Cho cause she has to be here, looks at him with sorrow. He hates it. He hates himself. Fuck. 

Peter continues to look down at the bed, while his mind struggles to stop overthinking and processing what’s happened. He hates how his body looks now. He hates how everyone saw it. He hates how everyone was scared… he just hates feeling guilty. But the more he hates himself for everything, the more he just wants to just… hide. He doesn’t want to talk. He doesn’t want his friends and his family to see him this way for any longer. He doesn’t want anyone to worry about him. He just…wants to be alone.

“I…I Dont want to do this anymore”, he chokes out.

Peter doesn’t know what to do or say, so he just keeps looking down at the bed. He’s trying to hold back tears, even though he hates being like this. He’s so tired and so scared and so guilty… and his feelings are only amplifying in this moment as he sees everyone just staring at him in silence. He just wants to be left to his thoughts right now. He feels like he needs to be alone. His heart is beating faster, and his chest is hurting.

Cho looks at the monitor and the group in alarm. MJ looks up and walks over to Peter’s bed, getting on the right side. Ned does the same on the left.

At first, he’s startled when MJ and Ned are by his sides. But he slowly calms down, as he looks up at them. He’s still not saying anything, but his expression is changing from one of guilt and pain, to one of relief. He wants to ask them for help. He wants them to know that he’s sorry. But his words aren’t coming out. He’s just slowly closing his eyes, before Ned speaks to him.

“You dont have to know everything right now, Peter.” Ned speaks softly. MJ squeaks in agreeance.

Peter slowly nods his head a little bit, but his eyes are still shut as he breathes in and out slowly and consistently. His breaths are becoming longer as he calms down now. His heart rate is going down as well. He’s trying to calm himself, trying to take things slower. Slowly, as his breaths continue to normalize, he starts to drift, trying to reach some sort of zen-like state for his nerves to stop going haywire.

Peter feels a hand running through his hair, and looks up to see Pepper and Tony.

Peter looks up at them, as Pepper and Tony start to softly rub their hands through his hair. They’re trying to console him and reassure him that everything is going to be alright. Peter can feel a calmness flowing through him as they do this.

“Hey, Bambino-“, Tony speaks softly. “-you good?”

Peter slowly nods. He looks over at Pepper and Tony, as he starts to smile. His heart is still beating at a moderate pace, but they’re at a more stable rate now. His breaths are longer, deeper and more frequent, and his hands aren’t tensed up anymore.

Cho breaths a sigh of relief and leaves to talk to the Avengers. Peter looks up at his parents. “How do I make the pain stop?”

Tony looks into Peter’s eyes with a kind and comforting look. He smiles, trying to reassure him and to calm him even more.

“You just need some time.”

Pepper nods her head, also speaking to Peter in a gentle tone. She smiles at him with a soft smile.

“Yes, just some time. That’s all that you need right now.”

Peter smiles as Ned and MJ speak, nodding a little bit as his eyes go slightly watery. They’re right. They have time. And with time, everything will heal. He will heal. He will become fine. He doesn’t have to push himself to figure it all out right now, he can just let it happen.

Peter smiles in his sleep, cuddling with the four of them while Friday secretly snaps away at memories that she will keep forever. None know of Friday doing this, as they continue to let Peter just sleep peacefully as the rest stay nearby. Pepper is even holding on to Peter’s hand and rubbing it, while Tony is just rubbing his hair and smiling at his beloved son.

If anyone heard Friday snap pictures of the five cuddling, napping together, they didnt say anything.

A few weeks later, after much therapy with sam, the Avengers feel like they are getting somewhere. They worked with Peter about forgetting things, and got him resources to help. Peter would be forever grateful.

One day, Pepper, Peter, and Tony have a family meeting, sitting at the table in their home. They haven’t had one of these conversations in awhile, so it was about time. Peter seems more relaxed now, with less anxiousness about him in general. He seems like he’s moving on, but he’s still scared. He’s trying to take it one day at a time though, now that he’s getting assistance from a therapist that actually listens to him.

The three talk about how Peter’s sessions are going, his meds, and how hes healing. Peter answers these all truthfully, not wanting to dissapoint again.

Peter doesn’t lie about anything, telling them about how he was afraid of opening up about his feelings. He was scared of being a bother, and a burden. He was scared of having to relive those scary moments, especially when he felt so responsible and guilty over everything. He was afraid of having to feel his emotions fully without any form of escape; being anxious about not being in control of his thoughts and feelings.

But they reassure him again and again that hes non of those things. They say it so often, he might just believe them. As Peter plays Mario Kart with Clint, he wonders if his life would be different if he had taken the leap. If their lives would have changed.

As he plays and talks to Clint of all people, the thought of what his life could be like if he did take the leap keeps popping up in his mind, despite how much he keeps dismissing the thought and suppressing it. There were so many “What if”’s that he could go on for hours and hours, but he won’t. He won’t because he wants to stop thinking about it. He just wants to be in the present. He wants to just live in the now, and not think about the past or a possible future.

And that he does. Friday ends yet another week that had everyone smiling ear to ear. 

Ending Spider-Trauma protocol

Authors note

Hi everyone. I hope you enjoyed the fic. I just wanted to say a few things.

My fics are a safe space. Im not a licensed theraoist, but im a great listener. 

I dont know where I got the idea for this, so I just rolled with it.

This will be the only time I use character.ai to help write a fic. It was kinda fun to do.

Also, fun fact, I didn't realize I could copy and paste the story into google docs until over 6,000 words 😭 True pain 

I hope you all take great care of yourselfs.

With all the love in the world

-Itsorea