Work Text:
The Diary of Shelly Citra
July 8, XX22:
Good evening, Diary… Um, no, that doesn’t sound right-
It's been a few weeks since you… went away. I haven’t really known what to do with myself, but Heather said that writing her feelings out has been helping her and wanted me to try it– well, to get my thoughts out on paper… or, uh, computer?
We all know the risks involved with sending people into the New World, we went into this knowing we could lose people, but… you were- are the best of us- all of us! I know you’re still out there somewhere, but it feels like I’ve lost one of the closest things to an older sibling I’ve ever had.
Bugsy may be my brother by blood, but he was never there for me like you were. I used to think he was so cool, so amazing, but… nothing I never did was enough for him. Though I can at least thank him for giving me the opportunity to go to Reborn; because of him, I got to meet Heather! And because of you, I got to meet everyone else!
People who I didn’t need to try and impress, because just being me was enough.
I may not know what’s going to happen from here on. But if there’s any one thing I can say for certain, it’s that even though I feel lost now, I won’t give up on you. You never failed to be there for me when I needed it, and I refuse to let you down by not doing the same for you.
I’ll become stronger. As strong as I need to be, and then some! And I’ll get there with the support of the friends I’ve made, and one day, I’ll bring you back to us.
That’s a promise.
August 13, XX23:
I’ve been a bit more inconsistent with my entries than I’d like to admit… But in my defense, I’ve kept true to my promise, and started training even harder than ever before!
I’ve been working hard with Victoria at Apophyll for the last few months! She’s really grown into her role as the academy’s Sensei, and has been helping me not only become a better trainer, but also guiding me in ways to understand myself better.
A lot of our friends come to visit and help with my training too! Ace helped set up a special simulation room for the students to use– but to be honest, I think they meant it as a gift for me. They even said it was a ‘Magic colosseum for our most dedicated knight!’ while unveiling it, which put a big smile on my face! And of course, Heather always tries to make time to check in on me– even with all of her Elite Four duties.
It’s been a little over a year since you disappeared now, and while I can say I’ve never really stopped hurting, I’ve found that it isn’t as heavy a burden anymore. Heather, Ace, and Victoria have been constant sources of motivation for me while I’ve been here, and with their guidance and support, I’ve found myself becoming more and more determined and open.
Determined to keep growing; as a trainer, as a person, and as a friend. I’m determined to become more like you, and to keep fighting for everything we built up while fighting Meteor.
Every time I hear that the New World brought another person back, I always hold out hope to see you walk through the entryway of Arclight’s club. We’ve gotten so many friends back, new and old, that it feels… almost bittersweet. I… I know that I should be happy that those we lost have come back, and that I have to stay positive, but sometimes, it’s so hard.
An author I really enjoy wrote a line that I can't help but think back on now, “With difficulty, so too comes a brighter day. Life is hardship, but it is also love.”
I know it’s cheesy, but if you can’t be here with us now, I’ll make sure you come back to an even brighter Reborn than the one you helped us create, no matter how hard things get. An actual “New World” that we- that I know you would be proud of.
January 22, XX24:
I don’t mention this to people often, but I actually became a trainer to try and get closer to my brother. I learned a lot from just watching him and studying- enough to become a Gym Leader on my own– but even with that, it always felt like I was chasing after his shadow.
But that aside, in the months since my last entry, a lot has happened!
Somehow, Charlotte has two gyms now? I always knew she was strong, but she’s become a different beast entirely! I also didn’t know that was even something that could be done! Though, knowing her, she could be running the Ice gym under a different name…
Speaking of her, I’ve actually started training alongside all three of the Belrose sisters. Laura has me staying at their house outside Tanzan (she finally got around to fixing that giant hole in the living room), and every few days, Saphira flies in on Dragonite and all four of us train together, practicing all kinds of different techniques!
Charlotte has been training me on covering my type’s weaknesses better, and opening myself to other types of Pokemon, while the other two work with me on different battle strategies that take advantage of the environments around me. Saphira keeps saying that I’m still too timid for my own good– which Laura always disagrees with– but I know that’s just how she shows she cares.
Saphira actually gave me a Bagon egg to raise, too! She told me during one of our sessions that raising a Pokemon from birth can better shape and define how I care for my team, and as a result, myself. I’m sure Heather is gonna be excited like no other, but I have to think of a name… Hm. I’ll come back to that!
But best of all? I finally got Fern back for that time he made me cry! I wish you were here to see it; even though he was happy for me, it still felt good to finally knock him down a notch. Though, I’m glad I did it after he got his attitude in check.
I’ll make sure to update you again soon.
March 3, XX25:
It’s been a really busy year for me.
I’ve kept true to my promise to get stronger, and because of it, my Gym has been moving up the rankings like crazy– I’ve gone from the third gym in the order all the way up to the seventeenth! When I told Saphira that I was claiming her spot next, she gave me this look and said “I’ll be the judge of that. I’ve been missing a good challenge,” which was so cool!
The Lilac Dragon herself thinks that I’ll be a challenge for her!
I’m gonna have to bring my all if I want to stand a chance, but I won’t go down without a fight, that’s for sure. After all, I have to take after you and never lose!
To be honest though, it’s been strange to finally have the time to focus on my gym duties. After a long fight, we finally managed to finish off all of the New World anomalies that came through the portals; oddly enough, after a while, new ones just stopped appearing.
We still can’t tell why for sure, but they were probably scared off by Heather and I’s tag-team strategy! Not to brag, but we’re basically unstoppable.
My new friend that I got from Saphira finally evolved into a Shelgon! I’ve been taking them into the New World with Heather, Ace, and I to watch us battle; even if they themself can’t fight super well just yet, it’s definitely shaped their personality a bit.
They’re determined and brave, and always there when you need them- kinda like you.
Now that the New World crisis has ended though, I want to get a new haircut. I know, pretty big deal– but for a long time, I’ve had one bang covering my eye, which I think blinded me to what could be. I would always be afraid to look ahead, scared of what the future may hold for me, or those I care about.
But I’m not scared anymore.
Now, I gotta have both eyes looking ahead towards a brighter future! One where nobody will have to be scared again, not on my watch.
June 20, XX27:
I think I have to stop saying I’m going to be more consistent with my entries. Feels as if I jinx myself every time I do, hehe.
As of today, it’s been about five years since you disappeared. I know I’ve been staying as strong as I can, but… to be honest… losing you has never become easier. You were a bastion of hope for all of us, and after so long, I learned that it doesn’t become easier. Those feelings- the grief, the guilt, the frustration- they don't really… go away.
They just become easier to carry, bit by bit.
Every day, I hold out hope that you’ll come back, walking through those doors like everybody else, and I know that one day you will.
After so long, the city is officially fully restored– mainly thanks to the ceaseless efforts of Victoria and Adrienn, though I did help where I could. I promised you an even better world than when you left, and I am very happy to say I was able to keep one of my promises to you. It was a lot of hard work, but rebuilding something with my own two hands felt so… real. I even got help from my newly evolved Salamence!
For a long time, I was unsure what to name them; I considered Saphira, or maybe Luna, but eventually I realized:
They’re a reflection of who you helped me become. Brave, confident, happy.
So I decided, it’s only natural that I let you be the one to name them- when the time comes, of course.
Today, I intend to fulfill the first promise I ever made to you by challenging the Elite Four in your memory– for me, for all of my friends who helped me get here, and for all of Reborn. To be honest, I wasn’t really sure if I should at first, after all, it’s your position. But Heather kept encouraging me to go for it, though I’m sure part of it is that she wants someone to keep her company on Charous, hehe.
I don’t know if anything will come from it, but as long as I try my best, I’m happy- win or lose. I’ll update you tomorrow!
June 21, XX27:
I… won. I can’t believe it, HAHAA, I WON! It was a real nail-biter of a fight, but I managed to come out on top! The whole challenge really pushed me to my limits, but my team came through for me– not that there was ever any doubt that they wouldn’t.
I’m only just getting started though, I intend to keep my position as Champion for as long as it takes, because I refuse to lose until I get to battle you properly– no holding back!
There’s no knowing when you’ll be back, but when you do, I’m bringing together everyone I can, so you can meet who we’ve all become– so you can see the effect you’ve had on all of us– and the region as a whole.
Until then, my friend.
- Shelly