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" What are you doing in my house?!"
"Uh, first, this is an apartment. Second, trying to take a nap."
"And you're not napping at your own place why? "
"You reinvented crocks, I'm not taking questions from you."
Senku practically wants to tip Gen off the couch, but he knows that he's not strong enough to lift the furniture, much less with Gen on it. The mentalist lounges with his neck arched over the armrest, watching him upside-down with a somewhat smug look on his face that hardly masks his exhaustion.
Oh, right.
Gen only just got back to Japan. Senku tries to lower his voice this time, closing the door behind him as quietly as possible; "You can't just pick my locks when you're bored, Gen. If you wanna come over, text me or something."
"I did, but you never look at your phone these days."
"Huh?" he's surprised, but Gen isn't lying. He's got 400 unread texts, and 12 of them are from the mentalist. "Oh."
"Yea, oh . What else was I supposed to do?" Gen whines, curling onto his side, no longer facing him.
"Call me?"
"Still no answer."
Again, just as many missed calls.
"Call the lab?”
"And if you already left? Then what?"
"Right...." Senku mumbles as he takes off his shoes and lab coat. "Sorry?"
"Uhu. Now let me nap already."
"At least go to my room, dumbass."
"Uh? No?"
"Why the fuck not?"
"It's your room, and somebody doesn't have a guest room.”
"It's too tedious to maintain one."
"Mhm, practical as always."
"Anyways why's it matter if it's mine? Just go be annoying over there. I'm hungry, I'm going to make myse- uh, us, dinner?"
"Real smooth, casanova," Gen chuckles mischievously, and he's surprised to find that he kind of missed that sound....how long had the other been gone? Almost three months? It felt like a long time and nothing at all, conversion seemingly picking up where they left off.
As Senku ties his hair back into a ponytail, and dons an apron, he can feel Gen's eyes on him. That wasn't new, he had always known that the older was constantly watching out for him. Being observant was something Gen couldn't turn off, but Senku knew he tended to have tunnel vision when he had a project at hand so he had always relied on the mentalist to have his back. Gen was his right-hand man for a reason.
So why does it make him feel warm suddenly? Spreading through his chest, knowing that even when the mentalist is irritated with him, Gen still cares about him. No matter how long ago they last saw each other.
"Why aren't you at home?”
"I already to-"
"Gen."
He sighs, half sitting up and rubbing at his bleary eyes. "Can't I want to visit an old friend sometimes?"
"Sure, because that's totally the whole story."
"....Why weren't you at the airport this time?" Gen asks almost timidly.
Oh .
He's almost afraid to look up. Senku knows the expression waiting for him isn't pleasant by any means. Knows that anything he says is just a flimsy excuse even if he's honest about it. But-
"I know, I know, you're busy. You're trying to build a damn time machine, after all....”
"No, I-” Senku starts without thinking. But he can't stop, not when the mentalist- diplomat -looks so dejected. "That was a dick move. I knew you were getting home, and I always picked you up, but....I guess I figured you'd be fine without me. Or something. I dunno, sometimes one of our other friends is there too, and your fans always show up. Lots of reporters too-"
"Are you tired of the rumors?" Gen interrupts, hiding his face behind a stray cushion.
"Wait what? Rumors?" he asks, growing more confused. Food be damned, he comes closer to the couch, crouching near enough but not too close. "You know I don't pay attention to tabloids."
"They ask us at interviews all the time, it's not just gossip mags," comes the muffled reply.
It takes less than a millisecond for it to click in his head. "That stuff they say about us being a couple? Why would I care? You always brush them off for us anyways."
"The leader of the new world, together with a backstabbing liar who probably seduced the enemies-"
"Whoa whoa, hang on, seduced our enemies? What, is that the latest bullshit?" Senku nearly snaps. "Do they seriously think that undermining all of your immensely hard and even dangerous work is going to sell? Do they think so low of me to not be a good judge of character? You're my right hand man for a fucking reason, Gen! They weren't there! You practically ran the show for me while I was on the side planning our next move. You're as much of a leader as I am, I wouldn't have gotten this far if you hadn't been there to help me!"
"You- you've never said that before," Gen looks up at him awestruck.
His face is immediately on fire. "I- It's just a fact-”
"Just a-"
"Hang on, I- I mean....it's the truth. My truth," Senku huffs awkwardly, rubbing the back of his neck and glancing away. "I'm....sorry that I didn't stop to say it sooner."
"Senku-chan...."
"Just, don't go getting all sappy on me okay? It's gross," he cringes a bit.
"Oh, it's so gross," Gen replies with a million watt smile that makes him feel like he's melting.
"Now go rest, dammit. You look like shit."
"Wow, thanks.~"
"I mean it, you're jetlagged beyond hell. Take a nap in my room, I'll wake you when dinner is ready."
"Senku-chan,it's your room," Gen repeats from earlier, making him roll his eyes.
"Mentalist, we shared sleeping bags and ship bunks, what's the big deal?"
"Oh, Senku-chan," he sighs, holding onto the cushion tighter. "You're dense as a rock."
"Don't insult Chrome like that.”
They both break into uncontrollable giggles, the tense and awkward air around them dissipating. It feels just like it used to, before they stopped being able to spend time spontaneously and started to have to pencil each other into ever-busy schedules.
"Fine, fine, I'll go.”
"Good. I'm making burgers," Senku replies as he watches Gen stand, stretch, and pick up the fallen pillow. "Stanley of all people gave me a recipe last month, Xeno swears by it. It's surprisingly good."
"It's not gator again, is it?" Gen mock-gags.
"Nah."
"Okay, sounds good.'' Gen makes a beeline for his room, while Senku takes a deep breath and gets ready to get cooking. He's glad when he hears the faint sound of snoring a while later. The mentalist would always deny that he snores, but after so many years Senku knows all of his mannerisms inside out.
Actually, he probably knows more about Gen than anyone on earth, revived or not. He was a really private person, it took a few years just to learn about his family life and why he got into magic and mentalism. Even Senku was more liberal in talking about himself, he told stories about his old man and his friends all the time. Gen, on the other hand, only said what needed to be said. His words were more calculated, enough so that only a few people actually knew when he was lying. Himself, Ukyo, Francois, and surprisingly Stanley.
But even they didn't get the full picture.
As he cooks, Senku simmers in regret over not being at the airport. They had so easily fallen into their new roles after the space mission that time took them further apart and he began to think Gen was fine.
Clearly he wasn't.
And why worry over a rumor? It just didn't make any sense to him. He fell short on that front, never having cared what other people thought about him. Gen put on such a bold and brave face, that it was odd for him to fret about it too. But Senku also knew he was a much more sensitive person deep inside.
He decided to place a quick delivery order, glad that those services were back up now. While he waits, he sets up plates and cutlery. Despite Xeno insisting that burgers be served the American way, he foregos that, knowing he and Gen will enjoy it more with rice and vegetables. He skips any sauce, but does take a minute to cut carrots into little star shapes the way his old man used to do for him as a kid. It feels silly, but....maybe it'll lift Gen's mood.
Right as he's finishing up, the doorbell rings, making him wince- that'll surely wake Gen. Senku opens the door just wide enough to snatch up the goods left on the doorstep, desperate to slam it in frustration with the delivery person- he chose no-contact for a reason. No one needed to know exactly where Senku Ishigami lived, and he wanted to let the mentalist rest up.
Unfortunately he hears the unmistakable sound of Gen stirring to life, sighing deeply he takes the delivery off to the kitchen. It's not long before the other emerges, bedhead looking like Chalk had spent the past hour licking every inch.
So why's it make his heart flutter? Senku decides not to think too hard about it.
"I look like shit don't I?"
"You looked like shit before you got rest."
"Gee, thanks for the backwards compliment," Gen grumbles with an eye roll that looks like it makes his head hurt.
"When was the last time you ate, Gen?”
"They had walnuts on the plane, can you believe it? Walnuts! What happened to airline pea-"
"Holy fuck, you need food."
Senku wastes no time in ushering Gen to the table and bringing both servings over, along with his delivery order.
"Senku-chan, this is Pepsi....”
"The store didn't have any Cola left...."
"Wait when did-"
"Just eat, mentalist."
"Are you my mom now?"
"Your mom was a bitch, that's rude."
Gen starts to mindlessly shovel food into his mouth, increasing in awareness as if the hunger finally kicks in. Senku watches him, eating more calmly, glad to see his friend slowly recovering. It's when Gen picks up a carrot that he seems to freeze.
"Something wrong?" he asks hesitantly.
"No, I uh," Gen stammers, a light dusting of pink forming on his cheeks. "This is unusually cute, for you I mean....” He admires the star shaped carrot like it's made of gold, turning it this way and that, mouth slightly agape.
"....My old man used to cut them that way," Senku explains as if that helps any.
Gen just smiles and continues to eat silently, so he follows his lead. They finish in silence, until around when he begins to clear the table and Gen, energy restored, starts to be his usual chatty self, telling him stories about his adventures abroad. Senku in turn tells him all about how things have been here at home. Before he knows it they're sitting on the couch again, conversation flowing animatedly as if everything was normal again.
If only it could always be this way.
"Why can't it?" Gen asks, tilting his head to the side. He notices his bangs have gotten longer.
"I said that out loud didn't I?" Senku cringes.
"You did. But you haven't answered me. Why can't it?"
"I- I don't know," he looks away, that honest expression on the mentalist's face too much for him to handle. "I'll mess it up again, won't I? And those rumors-"
"So they do bother you....?"
"It's not that, not like that I mean. I don't care what people say about me, about us. Only we know what's true," he grumbles.
"Then what are you afraid of messing up?"
"I, uh, I dunno. I mean, I didn't show up at the airport when I should have been there...."
He receives a solid flick to the forehead."Oi! What was that for?!"
"You're an idiot," He replies with half-hearted annoyance, but when Senku looks at him he's smiling like earlier, bright, radiant and-
And when did he start thinking about Gen like that?
"They can be like they used to be, but. Is that what you want?”
"Me? I thought I made that obvious a long time ago," Gen pouts, red faced, confusing him further. "You gave me the stars today....but I tried to give them to you a long time ago, dear Senku-chan."
His mind goes blank for a full minute. Then, all at once, his entire body feels electrified. " THAT'S WHAT THAT WAS?! "
" OH MY GOD, WHAT ELSE WOULD IT BE?! "
" I DIDN'T WANT TO ASSUME- I-! I fucked up ten billion percent-"
Gen stares at him for what feels like an eternity, until he bursts out into ridiculous giggles, squirming in his seat like a loon."You're such an idiot, Senku-chan!"
"I'm sorry!?"
"Did you really think I just did that because I felt like it?"
"W-well no, I kinda knew, but you didn't follow it up with anything else so I just-"
"Oh so now it's my fault?"
"No! I mean-!"
"Pfft, it's okay, calm down,I already knew how you felt, dummy. I'm your right-hand man for a reason aren't I?~"
"Wh- but-" he stammers, trying to make heads or tails of this. "Why didn't you say anything before? I- I wasn't even sure-"
"How you felt? I know. But I didn't mind. As long as I got to be beside you through it all, that was more than enough."
"....But you're upset about it now."
It was Gen's turn to blush and look away, using the same cushion from before as his shield. It makes Senku feel all fluttery inside. "Gen, we aren't exactly kids anymore. I don't care what they say because only your opinion matters to me."
It sounds corny to his ears, but it's true.
" Then why weren't you at the airport? "
"....Guess I figured now that we're older, you'd have moved on or something. They serve walnuts on planes, things have changed lots.”
“And you cut carrots into stars, there’s a lot that hasn't ... .I haven’t. You haven’t. Not deep down,” he all but whispers.
“Yea….it sure feels that way, huh?”
“So I ask for the last time, why can’t it be the same anymore?”
Senku feels stupid saying it out loud but he has to.“There’s only one bed here and it’s mine. ”
Gen goes wide eyed. “Did you just-“
“Um, I-“
“Did you just ask me out by asking me to move in?”
“Oh fuck-“
“You’re such an idiot! You think I want to sleep in the same bed? You snore, Senku-chan!”
“I do not snore!”
“Liar!”
"I call bullshit, you were snoring while you took your nap!"
"You were listening to me sleep? Pervert!" Gen snickers menacingly.
" Oi you started this!"
"Did I?"
"Huh?"
"Senku-chan, I really did mean it when I said I had been interested in you for long before we met....” Gen pauses, as if contemplating his next words carefully even though he should know he can express himself freely around him. Shouldn't he? "I found you so interesting just from hearing Tsukasa-chan talk about you, and when we met you flipped my life on its head. Who wouldn't find that incredibly exhilarating? We were risking so much to ensure humanity could survive and thrive in a new world, and it felt so easy with you. And....and then all of your- our -dreams came true in the blink of an eye. Every second felt like years, yet looking back it's like a blur of memories. Of course I wanted to be next to you for something entirely new to the history of humankind. But most of all I wanted to make your dreams come true. As long as I could be there to watch your accomplishments-"
"You were happy," Senku finishes for him.Gen only nods.
"That's how I felt too," he says quietly.
"Eh-?"
"You....you gave me motivation to keep going no matter how hard it got. Having our friends there helped, but I always wanted you to look at me. To, I don't know, be impressed I guess?" Senku rambles awkwardly."Oh..."
"See? I didn't wanna get all sappy, and here we are anyways. Tch, feelings are gross."
"Pft, even if it means that you're finally filling in all the missing gaps for me?"
" Yes! "
"Oh, dear Senku-chan, you're too much sometimes. Please, never stop being yourself.~”
"What does that even mean? " he mumbles, almost dejected. But he can't get it out of his head that this just happened- they just- and he just- and Gen-
"Earth to Senku-chan, you're doing that thing again," Gen sighs deeply, but doesn't sound disappointed so that has to be good. "You're adorable when you're like this, but you kind of just asked me out and confessed you've been interested in me for almost a decade and asked me to move in. Am I speaking to an alien right now or, do you actually mean it?"
"You're the mentalist, you tell me," he sighs.
"But I'm not a mind reader, you know that," he says, hugging the cushion tighter to his body. It makes Senku frown. He knows this is a wall, and he's supposed to find a way to knock it down. Or a way around. Solve the puzzle Gen has just put in front of him.
Or, maybe not?Senku touches the cushion softly, trying to get him to meet his eyes. "Can we-....can we figure this out together, Gen? Please."
He looks surprised, but his grip on that wall loosens. "Yea....yea, lets."
"Thank you," he smiles. He realizes he doesn't really say that enough. "I do mean it. It's just....I'm not good at this stuff. I dumped it all on you at once, that wasn't fair of me. I'm sorry, Gen."
He practically holds his breath waiting for a response.
"You still don't sound like yourself, but you're not lying," Gen chuckles quietly. That sound may as well be ethereal to his ears. "Thank you for being honest and upfront with me, Senku-chan. I know it's hard."
"I really should do it more huh?"
"I want you to be yourself, always. And I know that means talking about the hard things might not happen," Gen sighs deeply. "But your actions have always said more for you. So if you can't say it, will you show me from now on?"
Senku notices the grip on the cushion is lax. It fills him with relief. "If I do, is it enough? You....you waited a long time, Gen. All because I can't verbalize how I feel."
“I would like to think s-"
"Gen, please. Be honest with me too, yea?"
"I'm sorry. It's...."
"You've kept a lot in this entire time."
"You have too."
"Yea, but I can't lie for shit and you know that. If anything, don't lie and try to convince me you mean it. We're a team.”
Gen looks away for a moment, squeezing the cushion tight once more before entirely letting go. Senku only waits, hopes.
"The real reason I broke into your apartment is that, while I was away and I couldn't reach you, I was struck by this intense loneliness. I suddenly wanted to be back inside the observatory, just us and the stars at night. It....it was a refuge to me. When I gifted it to you, I thought perhaps that speaking your love language would genuinely get through to you," he replies slowly but firmly. "But at the same time I understood you were confused about how to feel. So, I backed off. I won't sugarcoat it, but I really did settle. You're my best friend and I wasn't about to tarnish that by distracting you or causing discord. I knew that you had said you might be ready when all of humanity was revived. I held onto that-"
"And then it didn't happen," Senku frowns, feeling a deep sorrow settle into his chest. All this time....
"And then Luna happened. I knew what it really was at a glance, but it stung a lot. "
"Oh Gen-"
"I don't blame you nor her, but....it made me think that maybe you would never be ready at all. So I continued to stay beside you, Senku-chan, because that's where I found my happiness."
"Gen, I- I'm so sorry-"
"No, don't be. You're not at fault for feelings I never brought up," Gen shakes his head. It messes up his bangs and Senku has to resist putting them back in place. It feels like such a small gesture yet so huge all at once.
"So, after the moon, civilization began to take proper shape again, and I turned to escapism. I volunteered myself as a diplomat, after all. It kept me distracted. Suddenly something I had held onto for so long didn't seem feasible anymore."
He's unsure what to say, can only do, brushing the white strands behind Gen's ear. Senku doesn't miss the way he leans into the touch. Nor how he mimics the motion, only he plucks something from behind his ear.
"You were like something that I couldn't reach anymore, too far away," Gen almost sobs, sounding as if he's keeping it in. He holds up a star, paper and small, like the kind he used to teach the village children to make while they were preparing for the moon. "Just out of reach.”
"But I never left, Gen," he almost pleads, feeling his eyes prickle with all these things they never stopped to say. Emotions are gross, only because the important ones hurt.
"We grew apart, we stopped doing so many of the things that were ours ," he replies and this time heis crying, small little twinkling tears on his tired face. "I ended up letting my lease expire, I didn't bother renewing it, somehow thinking that if I got off of that plane and you were there I would spill my heart and we would just naturally end up under the same roof again.''
Senku curses himself for his carelessness. For not making room in his mind for the things his heart wanted sooner. For hurting the most important person in his life that he ultimately took for granted. "But it can happen, can't it?"
"Can it? You'll grow bored of me eventually.”
" Bored? Of you? What makes you think that?" Senku almost recoils, surprised.
"You're this genius prodigy and I only have so many tricks up my sleeves," Gen says as he takes Senku's hand and places the star in the center of his palm. "You're going to keep changing the world and all I can do is spit a deck of cards out of my mouth! You're going to get tired of solving this puzzle eventually."
"Gen, that's why I like you! You've been the most fascinating puzzle I've ever encountered, I feel like I'm learning and growing with you," he says a little more loudly than he meant to. Senku holds the paper star up, closing one eye as he lines it up in his vision with one of Gen's steely blues, a night sky. "The stars are worthless to me if you're not there to watch them with me. I know I rely on you a lot, but you can lean on me too.”
"I- Senku-!" Gen gasps as if he were a drowned man breaking the surface of the waves. His tears, like the tails of comets.
"So....please keep staying by my side?" he asks, hesitantly. "I can't- I can't promise I'll be perfect, but I can always try to be better if it's for you.”
He doesn't have a moment to spare before Gen launches himself across the distance between them, breaking every 'almost-touch' they've evaded throughout the years in an instant. And Senku can't help but cling to him in turn. His chest feels like it's about to burst, and if this is what love is supposed to feel like, he could chase this nuclear fusion forever.
"Gen-" His words die off when the other pulls back and he sees what's in front of him. Hair a mess, eyes puffy and red, cheeks and the tips of his ears pink, pillow is somewhere on the floor. "Wow-”
"Just 'wow'?~" Gen smirks even though the delivery doesn't stick, considering how he looks.
"You're incredible," Senku whispers in awe.
"H-hey now!"
"I mea-"
He's cut off with a kiss, simple, just a peck on his chapped lips. But it takes his breath away. The missing piece. Before Gen can pull away he closes the gap this time, savoring the surprised sound against his lips. It's followed by another. And another. Before long, Senku has no idea how he ends up with his back against the seat of the couch, Gen fitted perfectly on top of him. They only break apart for air, but it doesn't last long. Wandering hands, halted giggles, boundaries breaking down one at a time as if they've got a lot of catching up to do. Which, they do. It's been over a decade of longing.
It doesn't take him long to run out of steam, however, and he has to hold Gen away for a moment while he catches his breath. Thankfully the face that looks down at him doesn't seem hurt at rejection. Instead-
"Wow...."
"Heh just 'wow'?" he snickers, out of breath.
"Definitely more than 'wow'," Gen grins down at him. "We....we sure…”"Yea, we....wow...." Senku agrees, certain his face is as beet red as Gen's.
"So, uh, not to be a killjoy or anything, but I'm really fucking exhausted."
"Ugh, me too," Gen agrees, collapsing against his chest, curling up comfortably, as if he's always wanted to do that. Senku,to no one's surprise but his own, had always dreamt of the same. Carefully, he runs a hand through the mentalist's hair, in absolute awe.
"To be fair, I'm overworked and you're still jetlagged," he points out. "So....I guess this technically makes the room our room now....?”
"Senku-chan, my sweet sweet Senku-chan," Gen chuckles softly. "You may have given me a three hit combo, but I never said yes."
"Ah fuck-" Senku starts, when a realization hits him. "Wait, hang on, yes you did! "
"Ha-?!"
"You gave me this" he smirks, holding up the paper star.
"A star for a star? Really? Even I find that corny," Gen chuckles softly, giving the little paper star a poke. "Your's was a carrot and this one will dissolve with a drop of water. That's really temporary, my dear."
"So what? Stars fizzle out and die all the time," Senku shrugs. He crushes the paper star for emphasis. “And just as many are born again from the remnants of dead stars. It's a cycle, and it's never going to end- not any time soon, at least.”
“So….what exactly are you saying?” Gen asks carefully, even though Senku feels like they're on the same page. Feels confident that for once, he's doing the right thing by his mentalist.
“We can be like those stars,” Senku replies, reaching out a hand to caress Gen's cheek. “One part of our lives is over, but we can go through the next one together.”
“You're so gross,” Gen says with a choked back sob, tears welling in his eyes and a wide grin spreading on his face, lips quivering like he might break down entirely.
The totality of just how much he kept inside is bubbling just under the surface, and Senku knows that even if it doesn't break now, that dam will overflow eventually.
But this time he'll be there.
“I know, right?” he chuckles, heart tightening knowing how much hurt he's inadvertently caused- but knowing that despite it all, Gen still trusted him. “So, is that a yes?”
“Yea,” Gen says quietly. “ Yes . For you, always yes.”
For us, always yes . Unspoken, but heard.
“Now will you come to bed? It's fucking late.”
Gen laughs, sniffling as he holds back his tears. “Yea, okay. Lead the way, boyfriend. ”
“I'm choosing to ignore the fact that you called me that,” Senku says as they rise to their feet, somehow not letting go of one another as if their bodies cry out for the smallest centimeter of contact.
“Aw, you don't like it? How about ‘partner’?”
“We can talk about that in the morning, mentalist.”
As they make their way to the room- their room -Senku has to wonder what it'll be like. Relationships weren't his thing, but this is different somehow. Maybe because it's Gen, maybe because they understood each other so well. But he has the rest of their lives to find out.
“I'm taking the middle.~”
“Then where the fuck will I sleep?!”
“That's not my problem!”
“Now you're just being a pest!”
“You knew what you signed up for.”
“Yea, and so did you. The middle is mine.”
“So now you're getting stingy? I deserve it more! I'm jet lagged!”
“Now you finally admit it!”
About 2.7 billion stars die per day, and around 275 million are born in that same time span. They have a lot of discovering to do, but Senku is finding he doesn't mind at all. And when they eventually curl up in the middle of the bed together after some squabbling, a nest of tangled limbs, he promises he'll turn up to ten billion airports if it means always coming home to this.
He might buy a pair of earplugs though.