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14th of December, 1976
“Do you think bats hang upside down in Australia? Or the right way up?” Mary asks distractedly, pulling at a loose thread on Lily’s bed covers. She spends a lot of time laying in Lily’s bed these days. Whether it’s to braid each other’s hair or revise for their exams, something about the proximity of each other fills them both with comfort.
A few moments pass with no response from the girl sitting at the end of the bed.
“Have you fallen asleep already?” Mary asks, eyes flicking up to her, whispers of a laugh on her lips.
“No, I’m awake,” Lily replies, a small attempt at a smile on her lips and her voice thick with worry. Most people wouldn’t notice, because Lily is fantastic at composing herself, but the hint of strain lingering in her voice tells Mary all she needs to know.
Sitting up and facing her, Mary grabs Lily’s hands, “What’s wrong?”
The thought of Lily being upset makes Mary want to burn the world down. She’s never felt this strongly about any of her friends before. She gently brushes her thumb over Lily’s hands.
“There’s nothing wrong, honest,” Lily says, squeezing Mary’s hands tighter, so tight that it’s kind of uncomfortable, but Mary doesn’t mind. It’s impossible to mind when the hands squeezing yours belong to Lily Evans. The same hands that smell like apples because Mary got her apple-scented hand lotion for her birthday that Lily uses every day. The same apple-scented hands that James gets to smell whenever Lily kisses him, or runs her hands through his hair. The thought of that puts an uncomfortable twist in Mary’s stomach that she’d rather not explore. She just wants her best friend to be happy and safe. And to be with someone who’s good for her. James is good for her, but Mary worries. She’ll always worry for Lily.
“Do not lie to me Lily Evans.” Mary warns, a stern look on her face. Lily needs to tell her what’s wrong so she can kill whoever is responsible.
A wave of hesitation crosses Lily’s face, before she lets out a sigh and visibly deflates, “It’s just that we break up for the Christmas holidays next week and Petunia has never acted as coldly to me as she does these days.”
Mary’s heart breaks. There’s nothing she wants to do more than find Petunia and slap some sense into her, but she knows that would hurt Lily, too. Petunia will always have a part of Lily’s heart, and Mary doesn’t doubt that Lily has a part of Petunia’s.
“Do you know how difficult it is to love someone and not be able to tell them because you don’t know if they love you?” Lily blurts out, tears springing in her eyes. And no. Absolutely not. Mary will not sit here and stand for Lily crying. She’s such a beautiful crier, but it destroys Mary just the same.
“Hey, hey, it’s okay,” Mary whispers, reaching out to wipe Lily’s tears, cupping her cheek to make Lily look at her. “She loves you, Lily.”
“How do you know?” She asks, looking through wet eyelashes, her voice small. She looks like the softest person in the world, Mary thinks. She would do anything just to hold her constantly, so nothing could hurt her.
“Because,” Mary starts, a smile creeping up on her face, “You’re Lily Evans . Anyone would be an idiot to not love you.”
“Well, she is a bit of an idiot,” Lily giggles wetly.
“Obviously. But you know what I mean: The bad kind of idiot. Lots of good idiots love you. Off the top of my head, James comes to mind.” Mary muses.
“You’re such a twat!” Lily squeals, erupting into more giggles.
Laughter fills the room as Mary tackles her on the bed, their limbs getting tangled. The laughter starts to die down and they calm, looking at each other whilst laying on the bed.
“You’re really beautiful, Mary. Did you know that?” Lily says, like she’s just discovered the eighth wonder of the world. It does inexplicable things to Mary’s stomach.
Her lips curl up, “Yes, I did know that. Thank you,” Mary replies, brushing a gentle hand through the ends of Lily’s hair. She could spend days doing it, brushing through the fiery locks of hair that she would happily melt under.
“That’s good. Merlin, I can’t believe you haven’t found anyone to snog yet. You know, I saw Sirius giving you eyes at breakfast,” Lily says, her smile dropping further into the sentence she gets.
“You alright, Lils? Thinking about Petunia again?” Mary asks, concerned.
“No, no, it’s not that…” Lily trails off.
Mary scans her face again, “What’s up?”
Lily’s cheeks heat and her breath gets visibly heavier. “I know that you know that I love James,” She starts, looking down briefly.
“Yeah?” Mary says softly, ignoring the angry feeling that is knitting its way into her stomach. “Did he do something? I’ll happily punch him if he did something.” She adds, not a hint of comedy in her voice. She means every word.
Lily laughs softly, “He didn’t do anything, and I know you would,” She pokes Mary’s chest before continuing, “Everyone deserves their first kiss to be special. The first person I kissed… Well, we weren’t in love,” She whispers earnestly.
Mary’s breath audibly hitches, and she feels blush plunge into her cheeks, “What are you saying?”
“Mary,” Lily breathes, “I’m going to kiss you, if that’s okay. I just think that the first person who kisses you should be someone who truly loves you.”
“Yes, it’s okay Lily.” Mary says breathlessly. She feels Lily’s hand snake around her neck and pull her in.
The kiss is slow and gentle at first, an innocent whisper of lips on lips, until Mary pushes a hand into Lily’s hair and deepens the kiss. A soft noise escapes Lily’s mouth, and Mary catches it with her own.
Is this what she’s been missing out on? Shit, thank Merlin for Lily Evans and her generosity. Lily’s lips taste like religion. She’s found God and she never wants to resurface.
She hooks a leg around Lily’s, pressing her body as close to hers as she can. Her brain cannot produce thoughts, the only thing she feels right now is Lily’s warmth and want, want, want. Lily’s hand tightens around Mary’s neck as she breaks away from the kiss, looking down, panting desperately.
Mary immediately grabs Lily’s free hand and peppers kisses along it, “Thank you, Lils.” She says softly. That makes Lily look up, bright eyed and smiling. Mary doesn’t know how long they just look at each other, but it must be a while because Lily’s eyes eventually drift shut. She looks so beautiful when she sleeps. Mary eventually gets tired herself, so she creeps back into her own bed.
It is not until she is in her bed, away from the warmth and charm of Lily Evans, that she remembers the kiss doesn’t change their friendship. Her cruel mind, determined to be the reason for her troubles, reminds her that Lily is in love with James. She loves Mary, but she's in love with James Potter. She’s his. What a prick he is, she thinks. A wonderful, lovely, handsome prick who is nothing but sweet to her best friend. She should be filled to the brim with happiness. But she isn’t. A silent tear falls down her cheek as she quietly sings herself to sleep, a song her father used to always sing to her when she was a child. It works, without fail, every time.