Work Text:
Stay High:
Bokuto sighed as he ran a hand through his white-black hair. He had done it again. No matter how many times that he had tried and tried not to break his promise to himself, he would end up just doing it again. Why was it so hard? Why couldn’t he just break the habit that he had? He looked down at the floor and rubbed his temples. His headache was killing him, but that’s what he gets for being so smashed. This had become a normal routine for Bokuto. Everyone would try to stop him. Akaashi, Kuroo, even that little brat Tsukishima that always seemed to yell at him for doing the doing even the littlest things. He couldn’t stop though.
He was technically insane. Although it was acute, it was still a fraction. Although, there were no signs of him flipping out and going completely insane, so the doctors kept an eye on him, but not too close of one. That was their first mistake. What they didn’t know is that Bokuto was more insane than they had thought. Along with being slightly insane, he was also had schizophrenia. The voices in Bokuto’s head wouldn’t stop, always telling him lies and leading him to false beliefs. They never stop, they’re constantly at it. Messing with his mind, telling him to do things that he never means to do… Bokuto just wanted to escape from this horrid world.
There was always one person that managed to make the voices at ease. Their soft and kind voice always ringing through his head. They were always there to comfort Bokuto and tell him that everything was alright. He knew that it was never going to be alright, the schizophrenia was getting worse and worse by the day. He appreciated the fact that they had always tried their hardest to make sure that he was comfortable however. Someone was always truly there for him, despite the constant lashes that he might take. They were always so understanding, he never knew why. He never knew why they stuck around and wanted to help Bokuto.
After all, he was insane, wasn’t he? Wasn’t that enough to scare most people away? Perhaps it was the schizophrenia, shouldn’t that be enough to drive them away as well? Maybe it was simply the fact that they had felt constant pity for Bokuto and just wanted to stick by him in an act of sympathy. Whatever it was, it drove Bokuto mad just thinking about it. Despite having all these negative thoughts about the situation, there were some positive ones as well. They might even be enough to counter or overpower the negative ones all together.
Bokuto knew that he had feelings for them. The voices in his head had always spewed out negative things about them, but Bokuto knew what he thought. What he thought was that they were the most amazing person out there to be constantly sticking with him and not being completely insufferable. Sure, he had Akaashi and Kuroo there supporting him constantly, but it always just seemed out of pity. When they were there… why, it was absolutely amazing.
A voice rang through the house, snapping Bokuto out of his current thoughts. He wasn’t sure what was said, but it had triggered his headache and it made his head pound with pain.
Bokuto had made his way downstairs and went to where [Y/N] had all of their things on the counter. It seemed as if they were making something, but he wasn’t sure what it was. Perhaps they were making pancakes, which was something that they had done a lot for him. They were always here when he had broken his promise, perhaps it was the fact that they were always the first person to know when he did. Bokuto always had a habit of texting them when he was going to do something that he would regret later on, it was another one of the habits that he had, but they were the good kind. He liked his habit because he could always depend on [Y/N] to be there for him whenever he had needed to.
“It smells good, [Y/N].” Bokuto said with a smile on his face, peering over their shoulder and feeling the warmth radiating from the pan on his skin. It felt rather nice, considering that it was always so cold in his house, no matter what the season was. Bokuto’s house was rather nice, it was well furnished. The walls were a soothing color of grey with an accent color of white, the feeling of the cool, black marble tile felt rather nice on his feet. It had suited the granite countertops and the dark oak staircase which lead upstairs. “What are ya making this time?”
[Y/N] looked over to Bokuto with a smile on his face and said, “French toast, I’ve made it for you a couple times before.” Bokuto nodded and stepped back from them, not wanting to crowd [Y/N] too much. A few moments of silence had passed before they had put down the spatula that was grasped rather tightly in their hands. [Y/N] was tense, Bokuto could tell by how they had been acting. “I know that you had gotten back into habit, Bokuto. I know that we have discussed this before, but I fear that this time you may have gone a little too far. You were so drunk when I had to come and pick you up, I’m honestly worried about your health.” What Bokuto didn’t notice were the tears starting to well up in their eyes. “I think you need help Bokuto…”
Bokuto’s lips were pursed together tightly after he had heard [Y/N] say that. He knew that they had cared for him very much, but they usually never had talked about everything concerning his health. It honestly had meant quite a bit to him that they would take the time that they have out of their day and spend it by trying to help him get better. He wasn’t sure how he should react to this, for this was not a normal thing that usually happened to him. Bokuto looked at [Y/N], who had looked right back at him. They were waiting for him to say something, anything.
Bokuto had done something that surprised the both of them. He had stepped forward towards [Y/N] and planted his lips right over theirs. The kiss was very soft and sweet to him, it had sent a huge rush through him. What made him even happier, was the fact that they had kissed him back despite the way that he had done it so suddenly and without a warning. You’re going to regret this. A voice rang from inside his head. They’re not going to love you back. Another had said. Everything that they had done for you is a lie. Usually, these would have affected Bokuto very much.
He would have had a mental breakdown. The thoughts that Bokuto got of [Y/N]’s antics being out of pity had frightened him, the one that he loved the most felt nothing for him. This was different. Now, Bokuto didn’t care what the voices would tell him. As soon as the both of them had pulled away, Bokuto had looked [Y/N] in their [E/C] eyes. A beautiful shade of red staring into a beautiful color of [E/C].
“I want to wreck our friendship.” He said with a smirk on his face. The way that their cheeks flushed red drove him insane. He wasn’t even worried about the smell of the burning French toast behind him. “Let’s become lovers instead.”