Chapter Text
- Y'know, Illuso never really thought he'd actually be a parent.
- Like, to some degree it was a given. When he was younger there was an expectation placed upon him, carrying on his family's name and everything, it seemed like being a father was an inevitability whether he wanted it or not.
- But then when he left his family, his name, and future behind for Passione, those 'plans' changed. He was one of the many members of La Squadra constantly complaining how the job never left time for outside relationships. It never appealed to him before, but now that he had to reconcile with probably never being a dad, there was an ache.
- And then he met you.
- And he married you, and when you expressed a wish to have kids with him, augh /pos
- It doesn't fully catch up with him for another few years and after a few more kids are born.
- He's in the middle of brushing your oldest daughter's hair when the movements slow. It's suddenly all surreal; you washing dishes from breakfast, your sons squabbling in the bathroom as they brush their teeth, your youngest clinging to her favourite plush from Uncle Risotto...
- He doesn't fully snap out of it until his daughter starts whining "papaaaaa!!"
- Illuso could almost cry right then and there, knowing she likely inherited the tone from him. But he manages to keep himself together for the next few minutes as he gets your kids all ready for school and drops them off.
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Years and years together, and you still never really knew when to worry about Illuso. The brief silence in the house gave you time to think about it. His positive emotions were so easy to read, but when he gets all quiet and spacey like he had that morning, it was impossible to tell what was on his mind. How was work? Could he even tell you details like that? Especially in a position like his-
You're shaken out of your own train of thought when the door opens.
You turn to face your husband and can see just how unusual his expression is, his gaze is delicate as glass and entirely focused on you. No matter what may be going on inside his brain, you decide to smile.
"Hey, darling," you coo.
Illuso marches up to you and in a second you're scooped away from whatever you were doing before into his arms. He hugs you like it's his first time, like you're a piece of heaven he may never get to hold again. You should be worried maybe, considering you know Illuso is far from a hugger, but you feel it - maybe in how his fingertips carefully trace your spine in lazy movements or the deep, relieved sighs he takes into your head, where he's buried his face - you can feel this is not a hug of fear, sorrow, bad news, or anything that isn't love.
You don't know how long the moment lasts because you just bask in it. It only ends when Illuso decides, pulling his head away but not letting go of you. One of his hands pulls back from behind you and takes one of yours. You're not quite sure what he's doing when he lifts your hand to his face until he grins at the wedding ring adorning it.
"What a lucky fella," he breathes, and you're not sure whether he's talking about you or himself before he presses a kiss to your fingers.