Work Text:
“Fawnlock the Red-Nosed Faun”
“T-take it off! Off! It’s tickling my antlers!” moaned Fawnlock as John wrapped the decorative Christmas lights around another branch of Fawnlock’s large antlers. Those big, strong horns were to fall off sometime in February and then Fawnlock would be left again with cute tiny antler nubs that would grow throughout the summer. Tiny antlers were adorable, but John knew he would miss the big strong antlers once they fell off.
He realized he dozed off and just kept on stroking lightly the hard bone covered in soft velvety skin instead of adjusting the lights.
“Are you done or what?” asked Fawnlock noticeably annoyed. He stomped his hooves loudly and made a frustrated sound that was almost a goat’s bleat. John just smirked and didn’t point it out. Fawnlock hated to be reminded that sometimes his animalistic side showed.
“I was just admiring how large your antlers grew this year.” John run his hand from the wide strong root, up to the softer branched part of the glorious appendage. That gesture calmed the frustrated faun just a little bit. Fawnlock looked with his deep, dark eyes at his human blogger.
“Hang on a tiny bit longer,” John patted the antler for the last time and took out the box with glitter face paint “I’ll apply a bit more glitter on your nose.”
“What? Why more!?” Fawnlock whined and wrinkled his already pretty sparkly nose. But the red glitter was already falling off the soft skin.
“Rudolph had a very shiny nose, that’s why.”
“I don’t get why you keep on calling me Rudolph today. You probably explained it to me once or twice but I wasn’t listening, so remind me please, who is this Rudolf that I am supposed to look like?”
“Oh dear, it’s umm… Rudolf was one of the Santa’s reindeers pulling his sleigh and he had a shiny nose. No time for explaining now. Anyway, I’m dressing you up all Rudolphy so we can take a lovely photo for this year’s Christmas cards, alright?”
“No. It’s not alright! I’m not a reindeer! I’m a faun, a mystical and highly sophisticated creature, not some domesticated beast of burden! And please do explain how exactly was his nose shiny? Mammals aren’t capable of having autofluorescent skin tissue. Maybe if he was a reptile or an amphibian… But then the sleigh-pulling part might be a problem…”
That ridiculous monologue was luckily interrupted by Mrs. Hudson.
„Yoo-hoo, boys. Are you ready for me to take the photo?”
“Almost, Mrs. H. Fawnlock’s just being fussy. Apparently he doesn’t want to be dressed up as Rudolph The Red-nosed Reindeer.”
“Why ever not?”
“I’m not a reindeer!” Sherlock spat.
“You’re also not a cat and remind me please, darling, who dressed up as the Cheshire cat last Halloween?” Mrs. Hudson said to him in a calm manner, just how one would explain a toddler that their argument is really wrong and pointless, and adjusted the lights on his antlers.
“That was just to accompany John, so he doesn’t make a fool of himself on his own.”
“Don’t lie. You enjoyed yourself,” John chuckled at the memory of their last dress-up party.
“Mrs. H, I think he’s ready” John said as he applied the last of red glitter onto Fawnlock’s cold nose. “I’m going to put my Christmas jumper,” (Fawnlock bleated at the sound of ‘Christmas jumper’) said John and left Mrs. Hudson and the faun alone in the living room.
“You know what, Fawnlock? I think that John made a brilliant choice. Rudolph is so much like you, you know?”
“Bah! I don’t think so!”
“The other reindeers didn’t like him, they made fun of him, he had no friends, and was alone for a long time,” listed Mrs. Hudson, “but, in the end, he found a way to be useful Rudolph used his special gift and the others realized he could be nice. Sounds familiar?”
Fawnlock looked away and grated his teeth.
“Please don’t talk to me like I’m a child. I’m a big faun!” exclaimed the faun.
But deep inside Fawnlock knew Mrs. Hudson was indeed right.
Meanwhile Mrs. Hudson turned the lights on Fawnlock’s antlers on. He had thought that maybe they will feel hot or unpleasant on this delicate part of his body, but they were not. In fact, they made him feel a bit special. His head was glowing.
“I know, I know” Mrs. Hudson patted his furry shoulder and smiled warmly.
When John came back, Fawnlock started to laugh out loudly. Well, in his case it sounded more like a goat choking on a
“J-jawn! This-this is the worst of your jumpers!” Faun managed to say between the baahs.
The jumper was in fact very, very ugly. But also looked very festive. There were knitted reindeers and Christmas trees, and there was also some silver, sparkly thread knitted into it.
“Shut up! It’s for the photo” John slapped lightly Fawnlock’s hooved leg “Calm down or the glitter will fall off!”
The faun knew he wouldn’t stand anymore of glitter make-up on his nose se he calmed down just enough to stay silent until the photo shoot was over. The fact that John kept on scratching his neck (‘the silver thread’, Fawnlock smirked) wasn’t helping it.
They sat next to each other on the couch. John’s jeans-clad thigh was right next to Fawnlock’s very strong furry leg.
“You look great with the lights on, you know? Like my very own, furry, Christmas tree. And a tree I can cuddle with!”
“Yeah, I know it’s great. But we won’t be putting them on again anytime soon. I could get a shock if something happened to the cable or the bulbs”
“I’ll do my best to hug you without touching the lights”
“Well... But no more glitter on my face!”
“Boys! Discuss it later, please. Now, say cheese!”
“CHEESE!” they said, putting on their best smiles.
“Oh, the cards are going to be lovely”
“Just don’t send any to Mycroft please”