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"You want to kiss a guy? Blake asked, a skeptical eyebrow up. He had heard Adam blabbing bullshit before, but that was new. "You're joking, right?"
Adam sighed; he didn't know how the conversation took this turn. A moment ago, they were talking about football, the next they were talking about this.
"No, Blake, kissing a guy is on my bucket list. C'mon, you've never been curious about this?"
Blake shook his head and took his mug of hot chocolate, "Not even once. What else on your bucket list, Fucking a guy?" He said, teasing.
Adam rolled his eyes, "You're seriously gonna act like that?" He asked, disapproving. When Blake just shrugged, Adam sighed and shook his head. It wasn't that he didn't expect Blake to react like this, that's why he wasn't planning on mentioning it; Blake never took these things seriously anyway.
"What?" Blake asked knowingly, just to tease Adam. "No wonder it's all rainbows and unicorns all over your house," he added, looking around at the lights and the tree.
"It's called Christmas decorations, asshole," Adam said back, huffing at Blake.
"I thought you're Jewish."
"But you're not," Adam said immediately, "you come here a lot, so I thought you'd appreciate some color."
"Awe, look at you being cute and stuff," Blake said, voice shivering because of laughter, "sure it's not because of your new sexuality?"
"Look, I'm not saying I'm gay, I'm just saying I'm curious. Nothing strange about that, we’re in the twenty first century, grandpa."
Blake pointed at Adam in warning, "Don't call me that."
Adam scooted closer to Blake and pinched his cheeks, "Then maybe you should shave this stupid beard, man! No wonder Gwen has been complaining about kissing you; it's thick, man."
"Don't remind me," Blake said, pushing Adam away, "we had a fight last night; she's honestly expecting me to move out to New York with her. What the hell am I supposed to do?!"
"If you don't want to go, don't," Adam said, sipping from his drink, "I said it before and I'll say it again, you two aren't too much alike, and it'll end badly."
"Seriously?" Blake seemed surprised and not satisfied with Adam's response, "Shouldn't you be smacking me on the head and telling me to move out with her, or something?"
Adam sighed, "Okay, fine. Move with her," he said carelessly.
"I can't," Blake said with a sigh, "why doesn't she move here. She always gives me this crap about her job. Then, what about my job? What am I supposed to do with it?"
"You can find a school to work at in New York, Mr. Genius!"
"But I've been working here for five years, Adam. It took me forever to get used to it. You're not expecting me to just go and start over in another school, are you? Besides, I'm getting a raise next month."
"Well she can't leave her job in New York, either. She's an editor of a magazine." Adam pointed out, "and don't forget that her kids' school is in New York. You have to put that in mind, too."
"She can edit from here. That's how she's been working for the past three months she stayed in L.A." Blake said, "And her kids can move here, too. There are plenty of schools here."
"Do you really love her, Blake?" Adam asked, suddenly changing the subject. Blake was surprised with the change of Adam's voice. He wanted to joke it off by saying something cheesy but Adam stopped him, "don't give me your crap, and just answer. Do you love her or not?"
Blake sighed and ran his fingers in his hair, "I don't know," he said in defeat, "I know I want to make her happy, I want to stay with her and... you know, things like that."
"Then why are you worried?" Adam asked, "If you love her, move out with her. I mean, you moved to LA with me; there's not much difference between L.A. and New York."
"You have mad skills with convincing people to do stupid stuff," Blake said in honesty. He had known Adam for years and not even once had Adam failed to bring someone to do something, even if it was too far out of their comfort zone.
"Oh well," Adam chuckled, proudly, "you were the easiest prey of all."
"No shit." It was more of an agreement than protest, "when I moved to LA, I came knowing I can rely on you sometimes, that I could trust you."
"And Gwen?"
"She's like... I don't know... Well I know she's too perfect to be with me. I mean, what if we broke up a short while later after I move out with her? New York if full of guys like you."
Adam's eyes narrowed a little and he cocked his head, "what do you mean by guys like me?"
"Those fashionable dipshits, who cuff their pants. You know the kind of guys every woman wants."
Adam rolled his eyes; he was never good at taking compliment - if that was a compliment - "One; Don't call me a dipshit, dumbass, and two; not every woman wants this kind of man, and three; you are not the kind of man who would worry about these things. What's gotten into you, Blake?"
Blake didn't talk and rubbed his forehead as if chasing a bad headache away.
"You look like you're desperately trying to find excuses to not go with her. Stupid excuses,"
Blake sighed, "I know," he admitted. He didn't even try to deny; it seemed pointless.
Adam looked at the television, and didn't say anything. After long minutes of silence, Adam straightened his back and looked at Blake again, "I'll ask you a question, and,"
Blake chuckled, cutting Adam off, "you're asking too many questions lately."
Adam huffed, and raised an eyebrow, admonishing. Blake rolled his eyes and adjusted in his seat.
"Fine, what do you want to ask?"
Adam took a breath first; he knew the question might upset Blake, but he needed to ask it. It was the only way to know how Blake truly felt about Gwen.
"What if Miranda wanted to get back with you, would you leave Gwen for her?"
After hearing the question, Blake's expression dropped and it hurt Adam; he hated to be the one bringing this up. Blake was silent for long minutes, looking at the hot drink in his mug. Adam didn't try to push him and waited for his answer. He knew how sensitive the subject was and knew that it brought too many memories to Blake. Adam respected that, and gave Blake the time he needed to think it carefully.
After long wait, Blake finally looked up at Adam, then shrugged, "Yeah," he said, voice incredibly low, and it worried Adam that Blake was about to cry. For people, Blake seemed like a tough guy, but only Adam knew what a sensitive man he was. "Our breakup... wasn't because we hated each other. She wanted a child, and I can't give her that.... even if I wanted to. So, yeah, if there's a chance we could get back together, I'll grab it. I'll grab it tight."
Adam's eyebrows furrowed, "Look, man, things like that happens; you're not the only man who has that problem. I wouldn't even call it a problem. You'll find someone who wants to be with you the same you want to be with her, I'm sure."
"I know. I know, buddy." Blake said, a tight smile on his lips, "It's just... we've been together for so long. I wish I found out before I fell too deep."
"You're a good man, you'll find someone else. You're not as hopeless as me. Man, I've been single for five years. Five years, you believe that?"
"You just aim too high. I told you, Christina has a crush on you, and you're just like, she's not my style. She's everybody's type for heaven's sake."
"She's a mistress, man. She'll tie me up and god knows what else she'd do to me next."
Imagining that, brought Blake to laughter; Adam was right, Christina was more into the kinkiest shit Blake had ever heard of or seen.
When he calmed down from laughing, he looked at Adam and let out a long sigh of relief. It was as if the rush of cool air in his lungs refreshed him.
"Well..."
After that, they fell in silent, drinking their hot chocolate. It was one of those moments where both had nothing to add, and just fell comfortably in a peaceful silence. They never felt forced to say anything when they're next to each other; they could spend a whole day together without saying a word and it'd be a damn good day. That was a reason why their friendship lasted all these years.
While looking at the television, a thought stroke Adam's mind and he needed to confirm it. So, he cleared his throat and looked at Blake. He knew he needed to be careful asking this, he knew brushing the subject again might gives negative results.
"Could it be..." Adam started slowly, Blake looked at him and hummed encouragingly for him to continue, so Adam did, "Could it be that you're dating Gwen because... she already has three children, and she won't mind... if you can't have one more with her?"
Blake blinked at him once then looked away, the corner of his lips pulling up; he and Adam seemed to share a lot of thoughts - sometimes at the same time, and this happened to be one of these times.
"I was thinking of that just now," he admitted, before sipping from his drink.
"Well? Are you?"
Blake shrugged, "It is not the first time I thought about it," he said, setting his mug on the coffee table a few inches from them, "and I'm starting to think I actually am."
Adam patted his friend's shoulder and tightened on it, "Do you want my honest opinion?"
Without looking at him, Blake nodded
"Don't move out with her, Blake" Adam said, his voice measured, "You're still hurt by Miranda, and lying to yourself is only making things worse. Take your time to forget. There's nothing wrong with that."
Blake looked at him in the eye and sighed. He knew there's no point in lying to his best friend; Adam had always been able to see through him - read what's in his mind.
Adam gave Blake one more pat on his shoulder then pulled away, "What would you do without me in New York anyway. You can't even find the bank alone."
Blake laughed. "And you couldn’t last without calling me at least once a day."
"C'mon, who need the other most?" Adam asked as he raised an eyebrow, "you call me asking about everything."
"Only when I'm lost or something, smartass. You're the one who calls me for the tiniest, little reasons."
"Like what?"
"Like last Friday, you called to tell me about a dream you had."
"So?"
"It was three in the morning!"
Adam opened his mouth to say something, but closed it again when he'd realized that Blake was right, "Alright, so I call you for stupid reasons, at least, I don't get lost in the city like a five year old."
"You're being annoying," Blake rolled his eyes and got up.
"Where are you going?"
"I have to leave."
"Why?" Adam asked, as he got up too, "It's cold, stay over."
Blake shook his head, wrapping a red scarf around his neck, "I need to talk to Gwen."
Adam nodded and tugged on the scarf a little to fix it for Blake. "Fine. If she kicks you out, you can come here; you have the keys. I'll let you stay... only for a while though."
"She's not like your ex," Blake said, zipping his jacket.
"You know me and Behati weren't on good terms."
Blake chuckled, "Right!" he said, before walking to the door, and opening it. "I'll call y... Shit, it's cold like a motherfucker!!"
Adam stood by the door and laughed, "I told you to stay over."
"Maybe next time. But hey, let me ask you something."
Before Adam could say anything, Blake was already asking him, "You didn't say anything when I told you that Gwen wanted me to move to New York. I was half expecting you to cry a river."
Adam laughed, shortly, "You're grown up, I'm sure you can make your own decisions. And, even if I cried, it wouldn't have changed your mind."
"So you're admitting you would have cried if I chose to leave."
"Not cry, but I'll be sad," Adam said. He didn't miss the surprised look in Blake's eyes, "We've been friends for almost ten years, so of course I'll be sad! I actually put those decorations because I thought that this is our last Christmas together, so..."
"Awww, aren't you sweet!" Blake said, softly pinching Adam's cheek, "It's almost creepy hearing you saying such nice things, though," he added, earning him a punch on his arm.
"I'm always nice; you're the one always getting on my nerv-"
Adam was interrupted by two lips pressed on his. He blinked twice before fully realizing that he was being kissed by Blake. His lips were cold and a little rough; his beard was scratching at his jaw, and his warm breath tickling Adam's skin. Adam gasped and stepped away, heart thumping like crazy.
"What the hell, Shelton?" Adam covered his lips with his hands, eyes fixed on the smug smile on his friend's lips. What the hell was going on?
"You said you wanted to kiss a guy," Blake said, smirking, "there you go."
Adam raised an eyebrow, and folded his arms at the level of his chest, "When I said I wanted to kiss a guy, I didn't mean a guy who hasn't shaved or showered for almost a month."
Blake laughed out loud as he turned away, "Merry Christmas, dipshit." He said before walking away. "I'll call you later."
"Merry Christmas!"
Adam smiled and watched Blake until he got into his truck and drove away.