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I can hear your alarm go off in our bedroom from the kitchen. Maybe I should mess with the volume on it again… Do you really need it so loud? I chuckle to myself as I add another scoop of freshly ground coffee beans to the coffee machine, figuring you might need the extra kick more than I do. I’ve been up since 05:00 after all… I rub my eyes as the machine does its thing and think of what I need to do today. A look outside through one of the nearby kitchen windows shows me overcast skies with dark clouds looming in the distance over the mountains. I think I remember the weather forecast yesterday calling for rain the next couple of days…
That’ll lighten my load some, but there’s still plenty of things to do…
I scrub a hand through my hair and sigh. I should shower at some point today, though I’m not sure when “at some point” will be.
Your alarm is still going off. This isn’t like you, Y/N. You never let it go this long, or did you miss the snooze button and doze off again?
(I’ve done that a few times myself.)
I end up back in our bedroom, where the alarm clock sounds like a critical mass reached! klaxon I’ve only heard in movies. Our cat Miso is scared out of her kitten mind as she cowers behind the scratching post at the foot of the bed. We share a look, probably thinking the same thing: Why is Y/N still in bed?
“Hey, babe…?” I go over and turn the alarm off before moving to my side of the bed so I can sit right next to you. I lean over you and reach out to gently brush hair out of your face. Some of it’s stuck to the corner of your mouth, which normally I find adorable, but today I find a little worrying. You don’t typically sleep like this unless you were out in the mines way too late for my comfort, but you haven’t done that lately.
“It’s time to wake up, hon…”
You roll over and wrap your arms around my waist, your cheek resting on my thigh. Even though we’re married now, I still find myself heating up whenever you get this close to me. It’s embarrassing when anyone notices, but especially when you do. I hope you don’t.
“Sleepy…”
I would love nothing more than to climb back in bed with you and snuggle the day away, and those days are few and far between now that the farm is doing so well. Too much going on for us to take a lazy Sunday afternoon off, or stay in bed on a rainy Monday morning…
Although maybe, if I get all the animals fed, milked, and watered, I could…
I do still have to see Mom. It’s Monday and I know she looks forward to my visits now that I’m out of the house. I think she sees me more now than she did when I lived there. Maybe she sees me different now that I’m out on my own doing my own thing.
“Do you want me to take care of the morning farm chores for you?” If you’re too exhausted to work today, I’ll pick up the slack for you. This farm is half mine now. I have to “earn my keep” somehow.
Even though you say I already do enough working full time from home… Compared to what you do, I don’t do enough. I feel like I don't do enough.
“I’d feel bad making you do it… You have that website to finish up, and bug testing to do on that other project due at the end of the week…” You sound like you’re about to cry.
“I don’t mind,” I reassure you. “This isn’t just your farm anymore, sweetheart. It’s ours. It’s my responsibility too to help run it.” I kiss your forehead and smooth your hair back.
“Sebby…” The way you say the nickname I’ve always said I hated now fills my heart with so much love and affection and warmth whenever it leaves your mouth.
“Hon?” I stroke your hair and shoulder. You look up at me with those eyes I swear I’ll accidentally drown in one day and pout.
“When…when you’re done chorin’ for the day…or at least the morning…can you stop in at the clinic and see if Dr Harvey can make a visit out here?”
If he can’t, I’ll carry you down into town myself to see him.
“Still not feeling great?”
You shake your head. “No, I’m still nauseous and my head is pounding and my nose is all stuffy and…” You groan. “The smell of certain things just isn’t vibing with me lately either…” You sigh as you rub your cheek with your hand.
“You feel under the weather.”
“Yeah. And I know Dr Harvey will probably just tell me it’s PMS or something, but… I don’t know. I have a feeling it’s something else. I just want his opinion.”
“I can stop in on my way to Mom’s, okay?”
You look upset. “But that does kind of put you out of the way from Robin’s, doesn’t it? Maybe I should go myself—”
I shake my head. “Honey, it’s okay. I don’t mind. Let me take care of things today, okay? The animals, getting Dr. Harvey, all of it.” I press a kiss to your forehead. “I don’t want you passing out in the rain because you overdid it again.”
The look on your face tells me just how grateful you are.
“I appreciate your help so much, Sebby. Thank you.”
Your praise for even the most mundane of things never fails to launch me to Cloud 9. I bend down more so I can whisper something into your ear.
“If you’re up for it, you can show me just how much you appreciate me later.” I give you a wink and a cheeky little grin. Your face turns bright red as your eyes glaze over a little.
“Oh my Yoba…”
I’m now incredibly aware of how close your face is to the area I want you to touch. Even after six months of marital bliss, any mention of getting hot and heavy underneath the duvet still drives you completely wild, like you can’t get enough of me.
“But if you’re not feeling up to it later, because you are sick, I can take a raincheck.”
The kiss you give me and the little sigh you make tells me that you really hope you can ‘thank’ me later.
It doesn’t take long for me to go through my farmwork for the day—there isn’t really much to do thanks to the summer rain. The animals all got fed and their water troughs topped off; cows and goats got milked; eggs from the chickens and ducks were collected. One of the fence posts looks a little sus, but it’ll hold until it’s sunny out again. The crops don’t need to be watered thanks to the rain. I did notice some weeds so I went through and pulled them, even though pulling weeds out of mud isn’t exactly a clean job… I wipe off my hands on one of the rags we use, and check to see the time: 10:05.
The clinic should be open by now.
I change out of what you call “chorin’ clothes”, grab an umbrella since it’s started to rain heavily, and head into town to talk to Dr. Harvey. Even though the farm is just outside of Pelican Town, it’s still a bit of a walk to the town center. It doesn’t take me as long as it used to, thanks to learning all the different shortcuts and being able to walk faster than I used to. (Chasing after pigs’ll do that to you.) The clock just strikes 11:00 when I walk through the door to DR. HARVEY’S CLINIC & PHARMACY. The bell above the door lets him know that someone’s come in to either buy something or get some sort of checkup as I fight with the umbrella before actually entering. A cursory look around the place shows that I’m the only one here as far as potential patients go.
Dr. Harvey comes up to the counter and seems surprised to see me. I know it’s not my annual checkup with him and that’s probably why he’s so shocked.
“What can I do for you today, Sebastian? Anything new come up since your physical last week?”
I shake my head as the door softly closes behind me.
“It’s not for me. It’s actually about Y/N.” I fiddle with the handle of my Keroppi patterned umbrella, knowing no one would think it’s mine since it’s Sanrio.
“Is she here with you?”
I shake my head. “No. Y/N is too sick to get out of bed. She asked if I could get you to make a house visit…”
Dr. Harvey looks at me with concern—you being unable to make the trip into town is worrisome since nothing really stops you. Colds, bruises and scrapes, sprains… You power through everything like a champ. I explain your symptoms to Dr. Harvey to the best of my ability, trying to not leave anything out, as well as add in my own observations. He nods with understanding, taking notes on a pad of paper with his logo on it. When I’m done, he finishes up whatever he’s writing and clicks the pen to retract it.
“I highly doubt it’s the flu,” he says, as he twirls the pen in his fingers in thought. “You don’t typically get it in the summer—have any of the animals been ill recently? The cows, maybe?”
I shake my head. “All of our livestock are healthy. Marnie checks them out regularly, and she always gives a clean bill of health for them.”
He mumbles something to himself as he heads for the door into the back area of his office.
“I’ll be right back. I need to grab a few things, and then I’ll head on over. I have a hunch as to what it could be, but I still need to do a few tests to confirm it.”
I nod. “Thanks.”
Dr. Harvey grins. “It’s no problem, Sebastian. She’s in good hands.”
What was once a trek through the mountains now seems like little more than a short hike through nature. Nothing’s really changed since I left six months ago. Same trees, same lake, same birds chirping and tweeting their songs in the morning into the afternoon. I nearly get knocked into by Demetrius as he leaves through the front door in a hurry, clipboard in hand, no doubt needing to study some plant “for scientific discovery” as he likes to say.
“Oh! Sorry, Sebastian. I didn’t see you there.”
Demetrius never did graduate to calling me ‘Seb’ like literally everyone else in town (aside from Mayor Lewis). This odd look in his eyes every time he sees me will probably never change, like he’s looking at some strange creature newly discovered in the woods he needs to look further into…
I’m sure Demetrius and Maru are happy I’m gone.
I’m not here to see him or Maru. I’m here to see Mom. She’s actually the one I miss the most out of everyone here, and she always asks about you.
“Is there anything that needs fixing or mending?”
“Any buildings that need to be built or remodeled?”
“Do you think you need another house addition?”
The last time I was here she asked that, and when I questioned why she thought we needed one, she said, “I could always turn one of the spare rooms you don’t use into a nursery…”
I told her I’d think about it so I didn’t take away the hope in her eyes of grandchildren in the not-so-distant future.
I enter the house and breathe in the comforting scent of pine and cedar filtering in from Mom’s woodshop at the back of the house, where she most likely is since she’s not at the counter. Instead Maru’s standing there going through something in one of Mom’s catalogs.
“Oh hi, Seb!” She puts the magazine down. “Looking for Mom?”
I’m actually wondering why you’re working behind the counter…
“Yeah. Is she home?”
Maru nods. “She’s in her workshop doing an order for Marnie.” She looks at her watch. “It’s about time for her break anyway. I’ll let her know you’re here.”
She disappears into the house and I hear her call out “Mom?" As I wait, I page through one of the furniture catalogs to see what Mom’s selling.
If we do need a nursery someday, I could probably get Mom to deck it out with some furniture…
Better than going to the city to a JOJAKEA where the build quality isn’t that great… At least with Mom I know exactly what I’d be getting, and it would last forever.
Mom sips at her coffee, completely lost in thought, probably mulling over the list of symptoms I gave her.
“I don’t want to pry,” she begins, as she puts her mug down. “Or be that nosy mom, because it’s none of my business, but…”
I stir more dairy-free creamer into my coffee.
“You have been married for six months, and I’m sure during that time you and Y/N have—”
I cover my head with my arms to hide my embarrassment. “Mom. Please.”
Mom’s face is as red as her hair.
“A-Anyway… What I’m trying to say is… From everything you’ve described, it sounds like she could be pregnant.”
I’m so lucky she says this before I take another sip from my coffee.
Pregnant?
Mom must’ve seen the face I made, because she asks, “You and Y/N talked about kids, right? Before she gave you the Mermaid Pendant?”
That’s something we discussed after I gave you the bouquet. I nod.
“Of course. We’re both open to having kids. You know. If it happens, it happens… We’re not actively trying to become parents.”
The house is certainly big enough for us to have one or two kids comfortably, and any more than that, we could always expand the house…
“You look scared, honey.” Mom reaches a hand across the table and squeezes my arm.
I’m scared shitless, Mom. I’m only 27, it’s only been three seasons since we got married, this is our first summer season together, there’s so much that needs to be done—
“I know I’m your mom and I’m expected to say things like this, but… I think you’ll be a great father. I know it won’t be easy—being a first time parent never is—but if you need anything, you can always come to me. Both of you.”
“I—thanks, Mom, I really appreciate you saying that, but she might not even be pregnant. It could just be a—a stomach bug, or—or overexertion.”
Mom laughs and gives me this amused little grin as she takes a drink. Placing the mug back down, she giggles a little before saying, “For your information, Sebastian, my ‘stomach bug’ turned out to be a handsome baby boy who weighed 7 pounds 5 ounces. Call it ‘maternal intuition’, but…I think she’s pregnant, Seb.”
“Who’s pregnant?”
Of course Demetrius would take this moment of all moments to come back inside.
“No one,” I say, a lot more harsher than I intend to. “No one is pregnant.”
“Yet.” Mom winks.
“Are you even ready for fatherhood, Sebastian? That’s a major untaking for someone your age.”
“He’s older than Taylor and I were.”
Taylor, the name of the man Demetrius hates despite never meeting him.
“I’d like to think Seb is more responsible than Taylor is.”
“I’m just making a statement, dear,” Demetrius says. “Having a baby is a lot of hard work.”
“I was eight when Mom had Maru. I think I remember how things were.”
“I’m excited for the prospect of a little niece or nephew,” Maru says, coming in for a glass of water and a snack. “Oh! I could make them the cutest toys!”
I rest my head in my hand. “You’re getting way ahead of yourself, Maru.” I look at Mom and Demetrius. “All of you are. Can we just chill?”
Mom keeps giggling throughout the rest of my visit over the thought of becoming a grandma.
When I return home, you’re still in bed all bundled up under the duvet. On the way home I made a pit stop at the store for some ginger ale and your favourite cinnamon rolls, the kind where the can explodes when you open them and take 20 minutes to bake.
Because let’s be real, I’m not really useful when it comes to making shit in the kitchen, unless it’s coffee or a mess.
I get to work making them in the once-too-small-now-too-big kitchen, hitting the can against the edge of the counter the same way you always do, yelling out “shit!” when the container of frosting nearly flies across the room and into a wall.
That doesn’t happen when you make these, at least not when I’m around.
I place the pre-cut rolls into a round pan I found in the cupboard before shoving them in the preheated oven. Setting a timer on my phone so I won’t forget they’re in there and risk burning the house down, I pull out the bottle of ginger ale and your favourite cup, the one with unicorns and rainbows on it. It comes with a lid and a straw, likely something geared for kids that you picked up because you liked how cute it looked and couldn’t resist buying. I fill it up and twist the top on.
I need something to put all of this shit on…
On top of the toaster oven is a wooden breakfast tray Mom hand-carved herself as a wedding present for us, so I grab that and put the cup and the bottle on it. I hope you appreciate this, Y/N. I want you to feel better.
As I wait for the cinnamon buns to do their baking thing, I try to imagine what that “bonus room” Mom once joked would make a great nursery would look like with a crib and a changing table in it. How we would decorate it. What would the theme be? (How can I work at least one frog into whatever themes I imagine?) What names would we be most likely to go for?
You are getting waaaay ahead of yourself, Sebastian. You don’t even know if she’s pregnant. It could just be a stomach bug.
I lean against the kitchen counter, my arms folded across my chest. I can’t picture myself as a father, but I can at the same time, if that even makes sense. (It probably doesn’t.) I can see a little girl who is cute as a button playing outside chasing after the frogs she’s trying to catch from one of our ponds. She looks like me but is covered in so many freckles like her mom. Her giggles are punctuated with peals of laughter as the frog slips out of her hands again and again. You and I are on the porch watching her, enjoying how much fun she’s having. You’re sitting next to me with a baby in your arms, she’s sucking her thumb, her grey eyes staring at the world around her in wonder and curiosity.
“Maybe when she’s old enough, we can try for baby number three…”
My jeans tighten just imagining you saying that—
The timer goes off and interrupts my daydream. I cancel it and pull the buns out of the oven before turning everything off.
They smell heavenly, and I realise how hungry I am. For food. For you and for food. I pound my fist against the countertop to try and get myself under control. Once things have cooled down enough (both the buns and my brain), I grab a knife and start frosting the buns. You like the frosting runny but not too runny, and I hope I’ve gotten it right.
(I’m sorry if I haven’t.)
I pull two of them away from the rest and put them on a plate that goes on the breakfast tray. I sigh out of happiness as I look at my handiwork.
Not bad for someone who’s a complete disaster in the kitchen, huh? Mom would be proud.
“Hey, honey, I made you something.”
Your face peeks out from underneath the covers. Upon smelling the cinnamony goodness, you sit up, eyeing the tray in my hands with interest.
“Aww, Sebby, you’re so sweet!”
I place the tray on the night table and give you a kiss on the forehead.
“I wanted to do something for you since I know you’re not feeling well, and I know how much you love these, so…”
You take my face in between your hands and pull me down closer, your face filled with such love and appreciation.
“You’re too good to me, Seb. What did I do to deserve such a loving husband?”
I shake my head before ducking in to steal a kiss.
“No, no, hon. You’re too good for me.”
You pout at that as you reach for the roll with the most frosting on it.
“I made sure to give you the ones with the most frosting on them,” I say, as you sink your teeth into it. You moan in delight as you flop back onto the pillows, kicking your feet a little.
“Oh my Yoba, Seb. Now you’re just spoiling me.”
I smile. “Anything for you, princess.”
You lick frosting off the corner of your mouth.
“How was your visit with Dr. Harvey?”
You suck excess frosting from your thumb before reaching for your cup to take a drink.
“He did a few tests. I had to pee so many times because of them…” You make a face. “I’ve never peed so much in my life.”
I chuckle. “So? What’s the verdict?”
You go quiet and pat the space next to you, by your legs where I’m currently standing. I sit, half on the edge of the mattress, half on the bed. You slide your legs over so I can sit more comfortably.
It must be serious if you want me to sit down.
You toy with the straw.
“I hate to do this to you, but I’m gonna need you to take me to Zuzu City to see this doctor Dr. Harvey recommended to me.”
I nod. “Of course.”
“I know it’s gonna take you away from your work. I’m sorry about that.”
I take your hand in mine and squeeze it.
“Hon, it’s okay. You’re more important than my job is.”
You sigh.
“Sebastian…”
Something has to be wrong. Fear claws at my insides as anxiety causes my heart to hammer at my ribs. You never call me Sebastian, you haven’t since we became friends and I told you to call me ‘Seb’ instead.
“One of the questions Dr. Harvey asked me was, when was your last period? I had to go back through my tracker because I honestly didn’t know.”
Come to think of it, neither did I.
“So I looked back and it was like…almost two months ago. My period is like clockwork. I just assumed it was late because of stress, or doing too much on the farm, or—”
“Wait.” My brain is catching up to what’s happening. “What are you saying, Y/N?”
You say nothing. Instead, you lift your shirt up to reveal your abdomen. I don’t notice anything different, but I don’t tell you that.
“It’s only been a couple of months, so it’s too soon to tell, he said.” You take my hand and rest it on your belly. You don’t need to tell me anything else.
Fuck. Shit. Okay. This is fine. Unexpected, but fine.
“You’re sure?”
You nod. “Dr. Harvey seemed pretty sure, but wants me to see this OBGYN in the city to know more.”
I can’t help but start laughing.
“I’m gonna be a dad?”
I cover my face with my hands and take a deep breath before brushing my fingers through my hair.
“Mom’s gonna shit when she hears this.”
I embrace you and pull you as close as I can without upsetting anything. I bury my face in your shoulder and feel wetness at the corners of my eyes as your fingers run through my hair and stroke at my scalp, sending pleasant shivers down my spine.
“We’re having a baby, Seb…” You kiss my temple. “Are you scared?”
I nod. “Shitless.”
That gets a laugh from you. “Me too. Maybe this doesn’t mean anything now, but… I think we’ll be better parents than the ones who failed us.”
“I’d like to think Seb is more responsible than Taylor is.”
I can’t help but cry. Happiness, sadness, bittersweetness, fear—every reason someone has to cry, I cry for it.
You give me kisses all over my face, not caring that your mouth is now wet from my tears.
“I love you, Y/N.” I look into your eyes and can’t help how much love I feel for you in this moment. I want to run around town and scream at the top of my lungs, I’m gonna be a dad! and I want to hop on my bike and ride as fast and as far as I can screaming, We’re having a baby!
But I don’t, because in this moment, I don’t want to leave you. I want to slip underneath the covers with you and hold you in my arms until we’re both fast asleep. Have us both strip down and bare ourselves and our souls to each other once again because I need to feel you and I need to feel you right against me.
I hope when I wake up tomorrow morning this isn’t all just some dream I had.