Work Text:
There he was, looking as beautiful as ever. Kim Seokjin, the most handsome man in any room that he walked into. Looking like the moon, the stars, and the galaxies spread across the universe met each other to create a person as beautiful as him. And it was not even his striking face, his narrow waist hidden by his oversized shirt, or his plump lips that stood out for Namjoon. No, that was far from it (although he would not deny staring at them for minutes on end).
The things that made Jin attractive were the things that people often missed. It was the way any person he interacted with was greeted by kindness and a joke always, the way his eyes shone when talking to someone, and the way his eyes windshield laugh attracted everyone’s attention in delight. It was the way he helped all the halmeonis in their neighborhood despite being a celebrity. Oh, the way they would dote on him, share their most treasured recipes, and try to set up their granddaughters with him. It was the way he cooked so passionately for everyone on their team, the way his staff was always laughing and giggling with him, and the way he took care of the younger members of the group.
“Namjoon, are you listening?”, Yoongi asked him loudly.
Namjoon groaned. Yoongi was going to give him hell for this.
“No, no, I wasn’t. I am sorry, last night was hell”, he said, rubbing his hand through his recently trimmed short hair.
“What happened? I saw you working out late at night and immediately pitied the machine you were working on”, Yoongi asked, guiding Namjoon into a quieter corner of the room.
“It was…nothing? But everything, I guess. Hyung refuses to meet my eyes also now. Is dating me such a horrible thought?”
“Wait, you asked Jin out? Last night?”, Yoongi shrieked catching the attention of Jimin and Taehyung giggling nearby.
“Stop yelling, Yoongi-ah! Ya, we were just taking a run together and it felt like the right moment and I kind of asked him out. He has not looked at me since then.”
“Namjoon-”
“No, it’s okay. I guess I am just not good enough for him”, Namjoon said and walked away from a conversation that would have certainly made him tear up. If Jin wouldn’t talk to him or even meet his eyes, he would at least make the most of this party and get drunk on good alcohol.
The night went away in meeting other friends from the industry, dancing with Jimin and Jungkook, getting drunk enough to ignore things for that moment but also enough to get himself inside his home in a drunken state.
He took off his shoes (clumsily, obviously) and walked to the kitchen to get some water while bumping into every surface on his way.
“Need some help?”, a voice he was not expecting to hear tonight said from the living room.
“Jin, what are you doing here?”
“Doing what every good friend does for a drunk friend, I suppose. I got some takeout to help with your state”, he said pointing to bags of takeout on the kitchen counter.
“Right. Are the others joining? Yoongi didn’t mention anything about us hanging out later. And I believe the maknaes are still at the party with their other friends.”
“Nope”, Jin said popping the p, “It’s just the two of us. I left the party early so I could go get food from all your favourite night food.” Jin stood up and joined Namjoon in the kitchen. He removed two plates and started emptying the food bags one after the other. Namjoon was not sure what was happening. The last thing he knew was that he had asked Jin out last night and Jin had just said sorry and run away with his manager. Apart from the group photos they took at the party, he had ignored Joon the whole time. Even when they were getting dressed at the Hybe building, Jin had been awfully quiet, surprising the staff members.
“Jin, you cannot do this. You cannot ignore me, your team member, for a whole day and then take advantage of having my house keys and show up here with my favourite things, still looking like a million bucks, and expect me to be okay with you here. You can’t be here after breaking my heart, no reason given, leaving me pining for you so bad while I am completely aware of the fact that I am not good enough for you.” Namjoon’s voice had started out strong but by the time he stopped talking his voice, just like him, was breaking apart.
“Joon-”, Jin said, taking one step forward and pausing when he saw Namjoon take a step back.
“Namjoon. Listen to me, you are a great person. You are so talented, so successful, you are the leader of the world’s biggest boy band and anyone would be lucky to have you in their lives.”
“But not you! You rejected me and ran away from me!”, Namjoon all but shouted scaring Jin a little.
“Did I reject you?”, Jin asked with a voice that made Namjoon look right into Jin’s eyes.
“What do you mean? You ran away! You haven’t spoken to me since last night. And I don’t know if it makes a difference to you, but it does to me, Jin.”
“But did I reject you?”
Namjoon was just silent. He didn’t know what to say to that. There was no rejection in words but the running away was a worse rejection than that.
“I did run away. And I admit I should have explained it to you by text earlier today rather than what did you say, leave you pining.”
“Then why, Jin? Why run away? Why not talk to me? No matter how many fights we have had as a band, we have never had a personal fight.”
“Because, Namjoon, I know you are extremely smart about most things on this planet but you aren’t the most aware person sometimes. Unfortunately, you had no idea that we kept crossing the same two runners at the riverfront yesterday. And I was not going to risk the two of us being exposed by people from The Dispatch.”
“But-”
“No, let me finish. I spent the whole night and morning figuring out policies and loopholes from Bang. They changed my phone last night, they made me re-sign shit tons of paperwork and if we do this, if we really decide to be with each other, you are supposed to change into your new phone waiting at your studio, go and sign that paperwork. But Kim Namjoon, don’t for a minute think I am not interested in you or you are not good enough for me. I have admired you and had one extremely long crush since the day I saw you, I have spent nights in agony wondering if your clumsy ass will make it alive the next day, perpetually giggling at your jokes, and pining after you and your beautiful body all these years. So, no Kim Namjoon, I did not reject you last night. My mind went into overdrive and I had to do everything to protect us before we started this.”
“Jin-”, Namjoon could not get another word out of his mouth because Jin had attached himself to his lips like a starved man. If Namjoon had been pining all these years, so had Jin. The man was a breathing, walking, stumbling thirst trap and it had been nothing but cruel to see him in his tiny shorts and big thighs, mostly without his shirt because he hated wearing them at home.
After a while, when they were in Namjoon’s bed eating all the food that Jin had gotten him, Namjoon didn’t realize that he had already cried happy tears in the arms of the man he had dreamt of for years.