Chapter Text
sophomore year. alexander's "fresh start" at becoming a better person. last grade he was at risk of being permanently suspended but luckily, with the principal being his father he stayed with the students wondering how he did. he was already on a temporary watch at all times by his dad (he'd been diagnosed with depression some months ago) now all students are going to be watching him like a hawk, wondering how the fuck he didn't get suspended.
alexander had a close friend group consisting of both his exes (Eliza Schuyler and John Laurens), the other 2 Schuyler sisters (Angelica Schuyler and Peggy Schuyler), his foster sister, or who he considered as a sister (maria lewis), and the "2 immature dickheads" (Lafayette and Hercules). they'd all been friends since middle school and had vowed never to leave each other's side no matter what happened.
though, yes he did have enemies. George King is one. alexander thought of the British prick as a clueless dickhead. Thomas Jefferson is another one. and they have a long history. starting in 5th grade, Thomas and Alexander got paired up for a project. alexander described Thomas as "rude, non-cooperative, and annoying." to the teacher and Thomas described Alex as "a self-centered, annoying, smartass" (to which he got a warning for swearing).
another one was Aaron burr. the only thing they had in common was the fact that they were both orphans. aaron's parents died unexpectedly and was sent to the orphanage with Alex, who came from the Caribbean at 8 years old alone after his cousin killed himself and a hurricane struck his village. he got sent to an orphanage and met the person he considered his sister. his twin even. maria lewis.
from the moment they met, they got along amazingly. they told everyone they were siblings (despite not being siblings) and the orphanage was too lazy to look more into it and deemed they never get separated. and they didn't. they went through every foster home together until at 14 they both got adopted by this man, George Washington. Both of them had taken a while to warm up to him. they can see his pathetic attempts at making them feel welcome and at home and feel a bit of pity for the man.
he and Maria share the same mental health issues kind of. She is also pretty mentally ill like him. She was diagnosed with BPD and depression as well but the only difference was that she knew how to control it. alexander not so much so she'd help him anytime he needed to. they both suffered with self-harm, they both had unhealthy coping mechanisms, and they were siblings.
maria was the only one who didn't treat him like he was glass just ready to break at any moment ever since his diagnosis and he was beyond grateful for that.
he heard a loud knock on his door followed by the creaking sound of the door opening. some voices muttering downstairs and when his eyes fluttered open he saw Maria. she had smooth brown skin, dark brown curly hair flowing down her back, dark brown eyes, a black shirt without sleeves, a red jacket hanging off of her shoulders, and blue bell-bottom jeans. he sighed and shifted around in the bed.
"Okay c'mon sleepyhead" Maria spoke as she pulled Alex's covers off the bed. Alex groaned in response and looked at her annoyed. "first day back at school. there's people downstairs, okay? Be ready by 7:30" Well that explained the muttering downstairs.
Alex groaned again and swung his legs off the bed. he looked around the room as if it was new to him before finally getting up and getting dressed. he put on a blue hoodie (stolen from Maria) and some simple black pants. he looked in the mirror and tried to fix his messed-up hair. he tried to make out the voices downstairs but they were too quiet to recognize before grabbing his backpack and made his way downstairs.
as he got closer and closer he finally recognized the voices of his father, Eliza, LaFayette, and Angelica. he would've stopped and immediately returned to his room if it wasn't for the fact that Maria was with him, looking and waiting for him to enter the livingroom. eventually, he did and everyone stopped.
"Alex!" Eliza called. it always amazed him how Eliza didn't care that they were exes. that they used to date. that he cheated on her with some other random girl at a high school party while drunk. cause angelica sure did. Peggy - as long as nothing changed between them she didn't care either. but Angelica cared deeply. Eliza said it took 2 months of convincing Angelica that it didn't matter for her to believe her.
he looked back into the kitchen - which still looked as rich as always - and saw his father muttering some words to himself. others would think he was just making breakfast but if you look more into it (something Alex did a lot). then his mind snapped back to why his friends were here when Maria and he usually walked to school alone. ever since his diagnosis and everyone found out about his unhealthy self-harming everyone's been babying him. and he hates it. everyone but Maria of course.
'alexander are you okay?' 'alex your strangely quiet' 'here, I'll make this for you' 'i'll walk you here' 'no this is too risky' and the list goes on. his dad, his friends, fucking everyone! except for Maria. alexander knows she's gone through this before and that she knows how annoying it is. sometimes, they'd go on walks and get ice cream just to escape it. that's how his whole summer has been. Baby-proofed like they actually think he's gonna do something terribly bad.
he walked up to his raven-haired ex and scanned the group for any hint of mischief. "why are you guys here?" he asked. "Me and Maria usually walk to school alone.." he walked into the kitchen where his mumbling dad was, Eliza following happily. his dad - George Washington - immediately stopped muttering upon his entrance and put on a smile Alex could tell was fake.
"calme toi, Alex. We're here to cheer you up!" Lafayette expressed, throwing his hand to the side and following Eliza. Alexander rolled his eyes and opened the refrigerator. while listening to the boring drama they were talking about and settling on making it background noise he searched the fridge for anything that looked even a bit appetizing. but found nothing. One of the new things that arose these past few years is his lack of appetite. yes, he still checks the fridge for anything to eat at times, but he overworks himself most often he forgets until his father forces him to eat something.
"Alex?" Angelica broke him out of his mindless refrigerator staring. he looked back at the group now all staring at him creepily and sighed. he closed the fridge and went to sit where they were.
"why are we sulking around when we have school in less than an hour?" he asked. clutching onto his backpack.
"Actually!" Eliza sang, searching her bag for her phone. once she got it she shoved the bright screen into Alex's face with an email. Alex swore he went blind for a second. "your father here" she gestured to George. and Alex hated when other people actually referred to George as his father, even if he is legally. "actually SUGGESTED you get a day off!"
"well I don't want it" he denied after inhaling deeply. he got up with his backpack on his back and everyone including Washington looked at him surprised like they didn't expect this. who would think someone who drowns himself in work all day would actually need a day off? and would actually take it when offered? "c'mon there's no harm in school." he added.
"and there's no harm in taking a break, Alexander." George cut in from behind him. "c'mon I gave you the actual permission-"
"no thank you." despite all of the rage brewing up in Alexander, he tried his best to keep it down and move on. he marched out of the door, slamming it with Maria not long after him. yes, he knows George is his legal guardian. legally supposed to take care of him. and he knows he's trying but it sometimes feels weird. if this is what having a father figure is, constant worrying, checkups, and a free day off then Alex wanted nothing of it.
he hated when people got in the way of his work. he - unlike any other high schooler - actually liked homework and studying. he found it most peaceful and drowned himself in it. if there was no homework, he'd study for every possible piece of work that can come up for hours. even if it was a foreign subject.
no matter how much his friends tried to get him to take breaks he never budged. luckily Maria was one of the only ones who didn't do that. maria was one of the only people he could trust to just leave him alone with his homework
he stomped down the driveway angrily as Maria tried her best to keep up with a piece of toast in her mouth. they had a rich house. one of the many things that comes with being adopted into a wealthy family. he couldn't tell if Maria loved it or hated it but he was pretty neutral. George insisted on Alexander getting some type of work space for when he could work on homework and study but he didn't expect the amount of time Alexander spent in there just studying. maria also had a study room to herself but used it more for a hangout room. she was never the type to spend her long weekends inside studying. She would rather go to some high school party and get drunk out of her mind.
he and Maria walked by each other's side in silence. he couldn't tell if it was comfortable or uncomfortable. uncomfy silence never really existed with Maria. no awkward glances, no unnecessary questions, no forced conversation, it's nice with Maria and that's how it stayed for the walk to school. nice with Maria. but she was quiet. eerily quiet. usually, she always has some conversation to brew up with Alex whether it's just mindless teasing or a real beneficial conversation.
but right now she's quiet which means she has to have something on her mind.
"you okay?" he asked. breaking the silence that passed between the 2. he looked at Maria to find that she was miserably staring at the pavement.
"Yup," she dryly responded, not taking her eyes off the dull concrete under them. alexander returned his head to the concrete. he figured he shouldn't push her far but she hasn't been this dry since like - 12 years old. "sorry just a lot on my mind" she added which made Alexander's head snap back to her.
"Things like what?"
"you ask a lot of questions" as if she didn't notice that the first time they met.
Alex rolled his eyes and scoffed at Maria's pathetic attempt to draw attention off of her. He would ask another question if Maria's phone didn't start buzzing uncontrollably. She immediately took it out of her pocket and frowned at who it was.
"I've gotta take this, 'kay? I'll catch up with you?"
he was still awfully suspicious when he walked off without Maria by his side. but he shrugged it off and eventually made it to school himself. he never quite understood why he and Maria walked to school by themselves together if his dad had a car and was the principal. he shrugged that off too. he eventually made it to school and went straight for the library before class.
he usually would do that. go to the library to study, do homework, or recheck the homework he had already done over and over and over again just to distract himself in the hour and a half he had before classes started. and that's exactly what he did once he settled down in the quiet, hushed, huge room in between the rows of books where a table and some beanbags were.
he got all his books and papers out and started reworking some algebra papers. re-checking his answers, and re-re-checking his answers, and re-re-re checking his answers. he hadn't even noticed the door slam open, the irritable mumbles of the students, and 3 people looking over him. eventually, his paper shadowed and he finally was forced to look up.
he saw the 3 Schuyler sisters. Peggy, Eliza, and Angelica with their arms crossed rather intimidatingly above him. "what blessing do I have to be visited by all 3 of you?" he asked as his eyes fell right back down to his algebra paper, mentally checking his answers and erasing all of the extra work that took up the paper. Peggy was a freshman, Angelica was a senior, and Eliza was a sophomore. no one ever really saw them together in school since they all had different classes.
Peggy plopped down next to him in a beanbag and looked over at his homework. "do they usually call you by your first name in high school?" she asked as she watched Alexander recheck his answers for the (not so) last time. Angelica looked down at him somberly and snatched the algebra paper from him in the middle of writing.
both Peggy and Alexander looked up at her before Peggy scrambled up from the seat and returned back to her spot next to Angelica. alexander rolled his eyes. "I'm not taking that break" he sat back in the chair and copied the Schuyler sister's arm fold. "there's so much more I need to do between-" he scrambled for some of his papers. "homework...studying!-i-there's time for nothing else!"
"y'know it's literally the beginning of the school year, right?" Eliza asked as she sat down next to Alexander. angelica and Peggy copied her. "there's barely any homework to get done and you'll learn everything you need to throughout the school year"
"Plus, you have the highest grade in this whole school!" Angelica added as she subtly tried to take Alex's papers. though, she failed.
"one of." he corrected as he regained his papers and organized them on instinct. "one of the highest grades. " he sighed and started again, mentally rechecking his algebra homework. "Jefferson's catching up to me quickly and if I slack off now I'll become a laughingstock. if I wanna be the best student I can't afford to take breaks right now" he picked his pencil up and started drawing out random equations.
the 3 girls exchanged knowing glances with each other before Peggy pulled Alexander out of his seat. "at least walk me to class Mr Best Student" she started dragging him out of the library before Alexander escaped her stone grip.
"Ca-cant Angelica or Eliza do that?" he stuttered as he looked back at his papers now scattered on the floor and then at Peggy who had her signature devious smile on. "what are you planning?"
"Angie and Liza have classes on the other side of the school. and cmon! it's MY first day of high school! you have said for EVER how much you wanna be the one to walk me to a class and give me a tour." Peggy responded completely ignoring his other question. "now are you gonna live up to your 8th grade dream or what?"
he eventually agreed after Angelica kindly threatened to hide all his papers and walked Peggy around the huge high school.
they were having a good time (after Alex let his father know he was touring Peggy around and Mr. Washington let him skip a few classes) until they saw a certain annoying Virginian. Thomas Jefferson.
To say the two were enemies is a huge understatement. They hated each other. From the moment Tomas saw Alexander he knew he'd hate this smartass. From elementary school, Thomas hated how he always felt the need to compete against him in everything. How he always felt the need to say he was right. How he always thought he was right.
They competed for Class president (which none of them won. They both got disqualified for being too hateful to each other and it went to John Laurens.), competed for the best grade in middle school, debated their asses off in debate class, Insulted each other, and someone they even got in fist fights.
Though, they could never say the other wasn't attractive. Thomas had chocolate skin that actually glowed in the sun, curly bouncy curls that looked absolutely stunning, brown eyes, and a perfect jawline, he was undoubtedly attractive to anyone who met him. Alexander included. But Alexander on the other hand had olive skin, messy dark hair that went just past his shoulders, Eyebags under his dark brown eyes (that Thomas always noticed without fail), and everything else that symbolized his rough sleep schedule. Thomas would force him to actually get sleep if he wasn't sure of the other's hatred toward him.
Alexander is sure he doesn't have feelings for Thomas but always rethinks whenever his stomach somersaults when the other's accent comes out.
They had a lot in common, and more that's different.
For example, they are both polyglots. They both speak multiple languages. Alexander grew up speaking Spanish and picked up English at around 4. While on the way he picked up Greek, Russian, Dutch, Portuguese, Arabic, German, and sign language and knows them all at only 15. Thomas grew up an English speaker but was always expected to succeed in whatever his parents told him, so he picked up French, Dutch, German, Japanese, Mandarin, sign language, And Malay.
Another thing, they both have insane good grades. Thomas was raised to be the best, talk the best, hell even walk the best. This included getting the best grades too but Alexander made that hard by his overachieving attitude.
Something they have different, Thomas was born into his family. He didn't lose anyone to sickness at 7 years old, his village didn't get swept up by a hurricane at 8, and he was a normal kid. He was rich as fuck, he got everything he wanted when he wanted it, he could play piano, he had loving siblings, and he wasn't adopted.
Alexander was. Alexander did. Alexander's dad left with his brother at the age of 4, his father often abused him before that and his mother died when he was 7. He went to live with his cousin, but he killed himself a few months later. Then after trying to care for himself on his own, a hurricane swept his small village. He was sent out from the Caribbean to America at 9 and placed in an orphanage not long after. he wasn't rich before that. He couldn't play piano. He and Maria didn't get everything they wanted. That's one of the main things he despises about Thomas. How he thinks money grows on trees.
"Hamilton!" Thomas shouted. he leaned against his locker talking to his "best friend", James Madison. (Alexander was sure Thomas only kept that shy prick around to be his servant. They were nothing alike!)
"fuck off Jefferson" They both always found it easier to call each other by their last names. starting in 5th grade, Thomas immediately insulted his last name upon meeting him for the last time and Alex responded with'Jefferson? what kind of last name is that then? you should change it to Jeffershit. That fits way more'
"what? too tired to acknowledge me today?" Alexander would've stopped to acknowledge him if Peggy hadn't pulled his arm and asked him where the science room was. so he simply directed his full attention to the curious 13-year-old telling him to ignore the prick.
Peggy was one of his best friends. she hadn't been too affected when the news that he cheated came up and told him every single thing Angelica said when she found out instead. ("Eliza, your dating an Icarus") he had agreed to tell her everything, she agreed the same. they've been friends since he met Eliza and they got along faster than he did with any Schuyler sister despite the near 3-year age gap. Peggy was demanding, confident, and weirdly mature (only when she wanted to) and Alex was the exact opposite. Peggy saw through him anytime and was also very very observant. a trait she shares with her sisters, though as he's found that same trait in all 3 of them. they can read him like a book.
"yeah, we're too tired to deal with your shit today Jeffershit" Peggy answered for him which got a raised eyebrow from Thomas.
"you got a new friend Hamilton?" Thomas asked but they were already down the next hall and had tuned him out already. They heard Thomas's attractive ass laugh as they turned the corridor and Alex had to stop himself from collapsing right then.
alex huffed and Peggy looked up at him as they tried to navigate the difficult halls. "so that's the Jeffers-what's his name who pisses you off so much?" she questioned. "I can say he's attractive right?" and Alex chuckled with a nod. he knew damn well how attractive Thomas is. sometimes he can't help himself from gazing off staring at that damned jaw of his. or wondering what it'd be like to run his hands through those brown curls...or just to be in a bed with him. thomas beside him, whispering sweet nothings into his ear.
but he was sure he didn't have a crush.
a crush on each other would be an early death for the both of them.
when he was done showing Peggy around he finally got to his history class. he wasted no time jolting down notes and letting his hands move freely on the paper beneath them. taking in brand-new information about different millenniums before him excitedly, listening closely as the teacher explained things he somehow didn't know despite his constant studying, he almost missed it when a paper hit the back of his head.
he nearly jumped out of his skin and his pencil fell out of his hands. luckily, no one noticed. he looked back to see Eliza staring widely - creepily - back at him.
'what the hell?' he mouthed. eliza immediately smiled and glared down at the piece of balled-up paper on the floor, signaling for him to pick it up. he looked at John who was sitting a few rows behind them. eyes fixated on the teacher with a pen fiddling in his hand. alexander rolled his eyes and reached down to grab the paper. he took one last look at the teacher before opening it quietly and what he saw filled him with much unnecessary madness.
take a break? ice cream today? on me! with the group? please! for Peggy? for me? for angelica? you can't keep burying yourself in homework Alex. it will lead you nowhere! -Elizabeth S :)
he rolled his eyes and crumbled the paper up. he shoved it in his pocket and returned to the teacher's words. picking his pen back up and continuing to write everything the teacher said.
"ALEX! ALEX PLEASE HEAR US OUT!" Alexander heard as he stomped away from the classroom quickly. at first, he was walking. then he found himself running to the library. he didn't quite know why he was so sad over this. he knew his friends only wanted the best for him but if he said no it meant no. he finally turned around and faced Eliza with horrifying, cold eyes.
"I'm not taking a fucking break okay? have you seriously ever known me to take breaks, Eliza?" he was a minute away from snapping if she didn't just leave him alone. he didn't want a break. he didn't need a break. he was just fine now. Eliza's eyes widened and she stared down with sad eyes. She knew he wouldn't take this break but all she wanted him to do was try. just try to get a break.
he was right though. Has anyone seriously ever known Alexander Hamilton to take a break? She despised how Alexander overworked himself. even when they were still a couple, she hated it. he never really even paid attention to her much. She could tell he was trying- or was he? That doesn't matter...she just hated it.
"c'mon, Alex!" John yelled, coming out of nowhere. alexander was beyond perturbed to be standing in front of both of his exes. "it's ice cream! how could you turn down ice cream?!" Alexander sighed deeply. he remembers turning down ice cream with his friends multiple times before this. whether it was studying, anxiety, a stupid depressive episode, etc he's turned down ice cream multiple times before.
he is one second away from snapping. from shouting. from yelling. from spilling all his biggest insecurities on them now because why can't they take no for an answer? he's left speechless wondering if when he opens his mouth if a 'fuck you jack' will come out or a simple 'no'. he's considering the first option before he settles on turning his head and walking into the library. he centered his head on the ground as the door harshly closed and locked in Eliza and John's faces. he looked around, wondering why he was there instead of the cafeteria. or at least instead of the bathroom or anywhere else.
he sighed and sat at a table in the far corner. no one else was in the library since it was technically class hours. he started to replay the conversation that'd happened with him and Eliza and within a second he was stomping away from the table and out the back door, running home. he arrived at the doorstep at 12:50 p.m. He looked around to see if George's car was in the driveway, unlocked the door with his key, and then stomped inside up to his study room.
inside had walls painted in beige - a color Alexander hated - and smooth wooden floors. There was a desk that went all around the room with multiple things on it. A computer, thousands of stacked books, messily ordered papers, a laptop, and above it was a TV he never used. George insisted on him having at least some modern fashion in his study room. In the middle of this desk were 2 rolling chairs and a beanbag.
He plopped down on the beanbag and took his head in his hands. Muttering words along the lines of 'fuck fuck fuck why would I do that'. He signed and eyed the messy papers. He knew if he didn't find anything to distract him he'd end up following his intrusive thoughts and doing something horrible to himself. So he got on the chair, rolled over to the desk, and started ordering the papers.
In the end, he had 10 whole piles. Get turned in by Jan 30th, Long until due, Finished, Not started, writing ideas, debate ideas, how to kick Jeffershit's ass, very important papers, use to win in a debate, from Dr. Jasmine. His brain had calmed down just a bit and picked up the not-started pile. He pulled out the first paper and started working on that. A 15-page math sheet.
he was so distracted he didn't notice George Washington come inside until a paper slammed down on his table.
"Washington." Alexander acknowledged, trying to hide the panic in his voice.
"Alexander." his loud voice acknowledged back.
Alexander hadn't even thought up time to make a valid excuse if Washington found out he was skipping school and for once, he was left fearful under Washingtons strong gaze against him.