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Rolan has made a good life for himself. He lives in his magcial tower with books and scrolls to learn everything from. His siblings are safe and fed and only usually irritating. Absolute’s forces have been defeated.
It’s just endlessly embarrassing, having to face the hero of Baldur’s Gate.
Everywhere he goes there’s talk of Tav; Baldur’s Mouth Gazette mentions them at least once in every print and most of the songs these days sing praises to the great hero. But no, that’s not enough. The adventuring wizard must frequent his tower as well.
And when they step through the doors to Sorcerous Sundries bringing their mossy scent with them, Rolan remembers every time he has seen them. The first time at the Emerald Grove, them advising his siblings and him, and them saving him. More than once. And him barely being any help at all, the novice of a wizard he is.
Never mind, that night in Emerald Grove the two of them had a talk of how they are both beginners when it comes to studying the weave. Rolan was on his way to Baldur’s gate, apprenticeship and greatness. Tav had an illithid to beat, and Rolan had the thought that he could learn for the both of them. He could impress Tav after they were done with the adventure. Rolan would be a proper wizard then, and if adventuring didn’t pay well enough he could…
So yes, it was embarrassing.
It’s not like Tav came to peruse his fine book collection or to loan the scrolls. Oh, of course they had no need for that. Tav had learned more on the road than Rolan had under tutelage.
Surely he had learned a great deal after getting the tower. But did Tav know that? Rolan doubted it. The last time Tav had come to save the day, he had barely been of help. Rolan was something Tav tried to shield from the danger; a fact made clear by loud annoyance of the hero’s companions.
It seemed like Rolan’s role would forever be studying in his tower and seeing Tav returning from their adventures, while yearning for the beautiful wizard. Each time now and in the future, he would be joyed to see them, and forever disappointed for being an embarrassment. Not good enough for Tav, not even brave enough to bring the matter up.
Barely confident to speak up at all. When Tav spoke to him, he was left reeling, mind eating itself like a portal. He would have a one look at those eyes, framed by eyelashes so enchanting, and Rolan’s skin would play on deeper shades of red than ever before.
It did not help matters, that Tav was endlessly friendly to everyone and knew to ask how his studies were getting along. Had Tav ever thought that they could have studied together? Could they have, without the mess of the Absolute? Would they have met in this tower? Rolan pondered if that would have been a happier world.
Tav had spotted him, their meeting a mirror of the one after Tav had reached the city. This was not the worst world to be. Tav smiled at him, all teeth, cheeks and wrinkles in the corners of their eyes.
“Are you too busy for a meal?” Tav asked right away. Behind them the doors were still open and Rolan could hear tourists whispering after sighting of the hero. Sun shone red behind Tav, haloing their entire being in a glow that was almost like them being hugged by -
“How can I help you?” Rolan asked to stop that idea from forming.
The adventurer wrung their hands. Scarred, hardened, and delicate. “I asked, are you too busy to eat?”
Many a night Rolan had been dragged to Elfsong by his siblings. It happened to be the place, where the heroes of Baldur’s Gate ate often too, but Rolan was not the only one in the know about it. Many a greatfull patron wanted to have a word with them, and while none more than Rolan, he never seemed to have a chance for Tav’s attention. Rolan had visiting in hopes to talk to Tav tenday ago.
So he answered stiffly: “I am.”
“Oh”, the other wizard answered. Their eyes did not seek his anymore. “I’ll just go then. And quit bothering you.”
“Thank you”, Rolan said, like an ass. Did he ever say anything remotely normal around Tav? What had they even said?
But Tav was gone and the doors were now closing behind Rolan’s siblings, who came in with groceries.
“Was Tav having a bad day?” Lia asked. She did looked worriedly after the hero, who apparently was now friend to both of his siblings. Well, it was not surprising. Tav was delightful after all, and his siblings lovable if not tolerable.
“Hungry perhaps. They were going to Elfsong”, Rolan said.
“Oh? I thought they did not like going there. Too many people trying to talk to them about them.”
“They are there all the time”, Rolan pointed out, “and they never seemed to mind.”
The look on Lia’s face was not unlike that time, when Rolan had suggested they travel without the other tieflings. Rolan added: “Well they are.”
“Somehow you have only gotten dummer since becoming a proper wizard”, Lia said.
“How’s that possible?” Cal joined the conversation.
“The hero-wizard of Baldur’s gate -”
“You mean the defeater of Absolute?”
“The very one.”
“The dusk of Gortash?”
“Yes.”
“The fire of our brother’s soul?”
Rolan would have blushed if he had no dignity. Lia nodded. “As I was saying, Tav was here, asking our brother out.”
“Finally."
“They did not”, Rolan interrupted. “They asked me to join -”
“- them for a meal.” Lia said. “No mention of the wrongly hated Elfsong or the Tav’s band of misfits, I wager.”
“Tav wouldn’t go there willingly”, Cal said.
“Which means Tav is there only when they have been dragged there by the formentioned party, and lately not even then.”
“Why would that be?” Cal said, with that voice again, like this was a joke. Rolan wanted to think in peace; if Tav had said where they would be eating; if -
Zurgan, it didn’t matter. He could have been with them, in their company, even if for a little while. He straightened his back a little and gave his siblings a judgmental look.
“Your tail says you are embarrassed”, Cal infromed.
Rolan swore. “I need to speak with Tav.”
Lia gave way with a flourish.
“Good luck”, Cal shouted after him. He meant well, Rolan coursed, but now all the customers were staring at him.
Tav hadn’t gotten far. Rolan spotted them immediately on the wall steps, their face in their hands. Rolan walked to them and waited. Tav did not look up to see, who wanted to bother them. They just sat still.
“I hate the Elfsong”, Rolan said. Tav looked up. Rolan did not think they had been crying, but they did wipe at their eyes.
“Yeah?” they asked, quiet.
“Yes”, Rolan sighed. He did not brave to say, why he was there so often on the nights they were, so he said: “I can make time for you.”
But because he did not want to spend his break with all of Tav’s friends he said: “For you. Just you.”
Tav was almost smiling. At the very least the corners of their mouth were pulling up.
“Yeah?”
“Yes.”
“I know some nice rooftops we could enjoy”, Tav mentioned. Rolan frowned. “Elfsong has the nicest one though. If it’s quiet.”
“I know a nice place with a good view, but it does not serve food”, Rolan said.
“Oh, where?”
Rolan pointed at his store, and then up, where the tower was.
“Right”, Tav buried their face in their lap for a second. “Let’s go find some bread then.”
When they got up Tav clean their clothes and took a long look at Rolan. He felt like burning and then some, because Tav took his hand in theirs. It wasn’t the worst world to be. Not even close.