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“Toya!”
“No, I refuse!”
“You can’t refuse this!”
Toya turned around and glared at his father. “The only reason you’re bothering with this is because you want to shove me out.”
“Why do you insist on making up conspiracies to-?!”
“Conspiracies?! You make it sound like I don’t have a right to be angry. You’d rather let a child take the throne over the rightful heir, yet you still think you can tell me who I have to marry?” Toya sneered, rolled his eyes, and continued toward the front castle doors, promptly ignoring his father who continued to yell after him.
“So, what happens now?” Keigo asked.
Toya sighed, “Well, I could leave. Abandon everything I’ve ever known and start over.”
Keigo’s hands stopped mid-removal of his armor. “Are you serious?”
Toya chuckled, “No. At least, not without a fight.”
“That sounds more like you.” Keigo unlatched the leather straps that held the chest plate against his body, easing the hefty metal onto the barn floor. “He’s really hell-bent on the arranged marriage thing, though?”
“For some reason. Couldn’t even be bothered to include some guys,” Toya said as he leaned against the pile of clean hay. “And all the women he picked were just boring. Three out of the five are descendants of warlords, by the way.” Keigo remained silent, leaving Toya to fill the silence. “He won’t let me take the throne, but he still wants me to create powerful offspring. What kind of sick joke is that?” Still, Keigo didn’t say a word. “Hawks?”
“Hm?” Keigo at least finally looked down at him.
“Were you even listening?”
“Uh, yeah.” Keigo wasn’t ignorant of the fact that Toya liked both men and women. He had spent most of his time as a guard protecting Toya from getting caught sneaking back into the castle late at night. Since they were kids, Keigo made a point of staying by Toya’s side, which meant that he witnessed many familial fights, had been the alibi for many petty actions, and listened to Toya vent about short-lived fascinations with the occasional person who came into his life. In short, Keigo had lived through many messy moments with Toya and didn’t want to acknowledge the void that would be left when he eventually did marry, leaving Keigo behind. “Maybe he’d let it go if you just picked someone yourself. Dabs?” He looked back to find Toya asleep. He sighed, “No, that’s ridiculous. You’d never settle for someone…like me,” he said quietly.
As Keigo put some distance between him and Toya, sitting down close by to keep an eye on him, Toya opened his eyes slightly, glancing over at him. He hoped that the blush creeping up his face wouldn’t inspire fire to follow suit. Settling isn’t how I’d phrase it, he thought.
After a few hours had passed, in which Toya only slept for an hour, he woke up and Keigo escorted him back to the castle. “I suppose I won’t be seeing much of you once the marriage is settled,” Keigo said.
Toya frowned, “Don’t say that. Do you think I’d let my father keep you here? Unless…you want to stay.”
“No! Well, I mean…you want me to come with you?”
“You’re one of the only guards I actually trust with my life, Hawks.”
“Toya!” Enji called out.
Toya and Keigo glanced back at his father. “Who is it tonight?” Keigo asked.
Toya spotted the red-haired girl inside the parlor, who stared at him with blind fascination. “I think her name is Natalie or something. Lost every ounce to care or to try and remember,” he said quietly. He reached up and brushed his hand over Keigo’s shoulder, “See you later.”
Keigo watched him enter the parlor but caught the annoyed eye of Enji glaring at him. When he first began training to guard the royal family, Keigo was overjoyed. The King was the reason Keigo could even be in the position he is today, ever since he sentenced Keigo’s father to life behind bars. Whether his father was even alive still, Keigo didn’t know. But because of these events, he was able to meet Toya and eventually considered himself to be quite close with him and his siblings. So close that Keigo realized he had fallen in love with the eldest prince two years ago.
“Keigo?” A woman’s voice called out.
He turned around to see Fuyumi approaching him. “Good afternoon. What does the sole lovely Princess need today?” he asked with a smile.
Fuyumi giggled, “Need is a strong word. I’d appreciate your company on a walk today, though, if you have time,” she said.
“Certainly.” He stepped aside and opened the front door, “Lead the way, my lady.” He stole a glance at the closed parlor doors with yearning and aching sadness in his chest, despite the charismatic, warm smile on his face.
Keigo walked alongside Fuyumi through the courtyard and into the garden, the sound of birds and wind being the filler for their comfortable silence. Since his starting day of serving the family, he had learned Fuyumi to be a quiet yet cheerful woman. Unlike other families, royal or not, Keigo was surprised that the King had yet to find someone to marry Fuyumi to, but it appeared that Enji was far more concerned with finding suitors for Toya and Shoto, rather than the other two siblings. Due to this, he often noticed that Fuyumi filled her days reading, going into town to teach kids who were unable to attend school during normal hours, and chatting with her mother.
The Queen was a sweet woman, from what Keigo could tell from the few times he had met her. The castle wasn’t exactly small, and his time was mostly spent following the King and his eldest and youngest sons around to ensure their safety, making it difficult to truly get to know Rei. “How is the Queen doing?” he asked.
Fuyumi gave a faint smile, “She’s doing well. I tried to convince her to leave the castle again the other day, but…she still says she’s not ready.” The King wasn’t exactly well-liked in the kingdom, but he had managed to uphold a fair share of supporters. Whether that be from fear of saying anything to offend him or not was the trick question, but it was better not to test the theory. By association, Rei had dealt with her fair share of consequences and ridicule on Enji’s behalf, as she used to try to salvage what she could of his reputation, only for her efforts to be squashed by the King’s pride. Fuyumi knew this all too well, yet worked diligently to convince her mother that the kingdom still needed her. “I’m sorry,” she said.
“For what?” Keigo asked.
“I…lied to you earlier.” Fuyumi stopped walking and sat on a nearby bench, looking up at Keigo. “I need to ask you an important question and need you to answer honestly.”
“Of course.”
“Are you and Toya seeing one another?” Fuyumi and Keigo stared at each other. She watched as his jaw stiffened. “I only ask because….my father is becoming really impatient with Toya and he’s starting to wonder if it’s because of…a ‘flirtation’ of Toya’s, as he says.”
“And you assume it’s me?” Keigo asked.
“You’re the only person Toya spends most of his time with.”
Keigo thought back and realized Fuyumi was right. Toya had stopped sneaking out to pay nightly visits over a year ago. It was around the same time that Toya had begun sneaking over to the knight’s quarters, where Keigo stayed. At the time, he had thought nothing of it and just assumed that Toya couldn’t sleep and had grown bored of sneaking out of the castle walls. The books, baked goods from the kitchen, random affectionate touches. Keigo mentally slapped himself for not having realized sooner. “Does the King know?” he asked.
Fuyumi shook her head, “Not to my knowledge, but he’s growing more suspicious by the day.” The faint smile returned to her face. “If you two are, though, then I hope you know that I support you.”
Keigo shook his head. “It may seem that way, but we’re nothing more than close friends.”
“Do you want to be more?” she asked. “Because the way he-,” she stopped and shook her head, “no, I shouldn’t say anything. I think you should talk with Toya.” The conversation stopped there, and their walk resumed, yet now in contemplative and confused silence.
Keigo stood outside of Toya’s bedroom, glancing around as if he were doing something illegal and feeling as if the King would catch him any second. This was an illogical fear, more or less, since he knew that Enji didn’t care about what Toya did in his free time as long as he followed the few orders he did give Toya. He exhaled his fear and knocked on the door, “Dabi?” he said just loud enough, close to the door, for Toya to hear him. The door opened seconds later, and Toya reached out and pulled Keigo into the room without even asking him what he was there for. “Whoa! You seem…eager,” he said.
“Let’s leave.”
“What?”
“Screw this marriage crap. If I’m not getting the throne, what the hell is the sense of doing anything he asks me?”
Keigo blinked at Toya, confused. “You lost me. What about leaving? Leaving to go where?”
“Anywhere! The only reason the bastard wants me to get married is because he still wants me to have kids. Don’t ask me why, I didn’t stick around to find out,” Toya said.
Keigo watched as Toya paced around his room, growing steadily concerned with each step. “Toya. Hey,” he said softly, reaching for Toya’s arms and resting his hands on his shoulders, “What happened?” Toya didn’t respond. He actively avoided making eye contact with Keigo. Keigo’s hands slipped down Toya’s arms, “There’s no point in hiding it. I know when you’re upset,” he said with a small grin. “I’ve had about ten years to pick up on stuff like that.”
“That’s what happened,” Toya said quietly.
“Huh?”
Toya slowly shook his head, “After Natalie left, my father and I got into another fight, but…he started asking about you, saying that everything’s taking too damn long because of you being here and around me. He threatened to fire you, and I…lost it.” He sighed and guided Keigo over to his bed, sitting on the edge, and he continued to explain. “I can’t stand the thought of you not being with me. Even if I had to marry some random person, as long as I have you by my side, then I can tolerate the stupid marriage.”
It wasn’t as if they didn’t know this day was coming, but their timely separation was bound to happen, and Keigo had accepted a while ago that the day was ever-approaching. “Toya…”
Toya turned to Keigo, took his hands in his and held them tightly. “I heard you in the barn earlier. I told my father that I already had someone in mind that I wanted to marry.” He paused to swallow, hard, nearly choking on the nerves that led to a furious blush on his face. “And your name came out before I could stop myself.”
Keigo stared at Toya with wide eyes and a slightly open mouth. Then, reality slapped him in the face as to what was happening. There was no chance that the King would settle with him as a suitor for his son if his end goal of an arranged marriage was for grandchildren, and running away and basically “kidnapping” the eldest prince would also be highly frowned upon. But that didn’t stop Keigo from moving. He stood up, still holding Toya’s hand. “Leaving means giving up the comfortable life you’ve always known,” he said.
“I know.”
“And we might never be able to come back.”
Toya nodded, “I know.”
Keigo inhaled and held his breath for a few seconds, then slowly exhaled. “Tomorrow, then. Think it over and get your things in order. If this is what you really want, then we’ll leave.”
Toya quickly stood up. “Really? You’re serious?”
“I wouldn’t joke about getting to spend the rest of my life with you.” Keigo smiled and leaned in, kissing Toya’s cheek softly. “I’ve…loved you for a very long time, Toya.” He kissed his cheek again and slowly pulled away. “But think about it. Throwing your life away for some guy, even if I’m the guy, I don’t want you to make what could be a huge mistake.”
Toya held tightly onto Keigo’s hand before he fully slipped away. “You told me for years that I wasn’t a mistake. Why would I ever think you would be? I’ll be waiting by the garden gates tomorrow night,” he said as he let Keigo’s hand go and watched as his precious knight slipped back out into the candle-lit hallway.
Standing in the dark, surrounded by the blooming roses, Keigo waited outside the garden gates with a bag containing his few possessions and clothing. The sun had already long set, leaving Keigo with only the shifting stars above him as a source of time. It’s been an hour already. Maybe he decided against it. Although pained, Keigo sighed with a mix of understanding and relief for Toya’s well-being. He knew the world outside the kingdom walls wasn’t going to be kind to them, and Keigo couldn’t live with himself if he was the reason for Toya getting hurt, or worse, killed. Keigo picked up his bag and slung it over his shoulder, preparing to return to his quarters.
“Change your mind?”
Keigo stopped and turned back, spotting Toya’s white hair in the dark. “You…you came?”
“I said I would be waiting by the garden gates.”
“And yet, I beat you here.”
Toya grinned, “I never said when I would be outside these gates, did I? You’re just an early bird.” He approached Keigo and dropped his bag on the ground next to their feet. “Or you couldn’t contain your excitement.” Toya wrapped his arms around Keigo’s shoulders and pulled him in, kissing him deeply. Years of getting to know each other, of spending almost every free second together, had built up to this moment. Finally, the tension from Toya’s shoulders disappeared, the stress of the denial of feelings and fighting a marriage he never wanted melting away with a single kiss. He pulled back from the kiss, still hanging onto Keigo, “Lead the way, birdie.”
“Are you sure?” Keigo asked.
“I left letters for everyone to find. I’ve said the goodbyes that matter. I’m sure.”
Keigo kissed Toya and hugged him tightly. “Okay. Then,” he held tightly onto Toya’s hand, “this way. I have a few friends waiting for us a few kingdoms over.” They picked up their bags and opened the garden gates, sneaking through the maze where a dead end revealed a secret passageway under the stone pavers. They stole one last glance at the castle, then looked at each other with adoration shining in their eyes like the stars above, before finally slipping away to start the next chapter together.