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It was often at night when Sesshomaru would hear the smallest amount of sniffling in the direction of your sleeping figure.
Rin and Jaken lay motionless in their cots while your body would physically tremor from nightmares, and he felt unable to do anything about it.
Sesshomaru began to notice these things happening about one month ago, when you decided to sleep next to him at camp. At first he wasn't sure if you were cold from the night time weather, but decided to press his hand to your side to shake you awake.
Your eyes shot open and you started panting as if the air was being sucked out of you. Honestly, it startled him as well, but he kept it well concealed through widened eyes.
He asked you about it the next day, seeing as you immediately fell back asleep once you caught your breath, and you danced around the topic, saying that it was just a stupid nightmare.
He would have pressed on the issue, but you were briskly pulled away by his ward, and Jaken had pulled him into another conversation. Safe to say, you got lucky.
Unfortunately, that didn't mean he wouldn't inquire about it almost every time he had to wake you up from these night terrors, and it was often. It especially seemed to happen whenever the camp was set nearby a well.
And that goes without even mentioning what the constant lack of sleep was doing to your body and mental state.
Sesshomaru's ears perked up once more at the slightest change in breathing, he turned his gaze to you, letting his eyes wander to see if it was happening again. Unsurprisingly, it was.
He rose to his feet and made his way over to your sleeping figure. By this point, he knew the routine and softly shook you awake, awaiting your panicked response.
...
Nothing. He spoke up, "Y/n."
You began to stir, half-awake, trying to blink away the tiredness to no avail. "Mm.. Sesshomaru..?"
"You were having that nightmare again."
"Again..? Oh... I just- remembered something."
"..."
He hated that response. He hated every response he's heard so far because they've been lies. If there was anything he couldn't stand, it was people lying to his face and thinking that he wouldn't realize it.
"Y/n. I grow tired of having to do this every night with no further explanation."
You snorted, as if you asked to be looked after like this. "I didn't ask to have such a hyperactive mind at night, but here we are."
Boy, that seemed like the worst response to give, because Sesshomaru looked pissed. More than usual.
But being the quippy smartass you were, of course you would say something stupidly passive-aggressive to the dog demon responsible for the death of thousands per year.
You're expecting Sesshomaru to blow up on you, maybe even force the information out of you, but he just exhales, closing his eyes.
"I am no mind reader, Y/n, I cannot help you if you do not speak up." He paused for a moment, only to softly caress the side of your face with his hand. "So I ask again, what ails you?"
A sudden pang of guilt hits you in the stomach, and it makes you want to confess your fears. But you're scared to admit it. Scared to admit that your fears for the safety of the group were causing you to lose sleep, and conversely, lowering everyones chances of survival.
Which honestly sounds stupid. Why wouldn't you tell him? He's your protection, your lover, and.. a lot more.
And yet you couldn't tell him that you were so traumatized from your fatal encounter with Naraku, that you slept with a constant memory burned into your mind, and even more nightmares revolving around the moment he found your group, your safety.
You feel your eyes begin to sting as tears start to pool, you tried to rub away before it became too noticeable but no such luck. Quietly, you shed a few tears, keeping the sniffling down to a minimum.
"I'm sorry- I just-"
Sesshomaru shushed you in a soothing tone, his hand moving to the back of your neck to hold you against his chest. At this point, you couldn't help but begin to ramble on.
What started out as just saying that the nightmares were from Naraku then escalated to the gorey details. Naraku defeats and body snatches Sesshomaru, decapitates A-Un and mutilates Jaken and leaves Rin for last. The worst thing you've heard him say in Sesshomaru's voice was that her screams were the sweetest.
Every night you awoke in terror, you had to check the beds, you just had to. Making sure Rin was safe, the two-headed dragon remain asleep, and Jaken not deathly quiet.
All the while, Sesshomaru listened intently. At first you weren't sure if he was judging you for those explicit dreams all because of an encounter you had with the half-demon, but after a while came something unexpected.
"I understand your fears. It's not easy to disregard the event of one's own death, especially when fear is the last thing you ever feel."
Huh? He.. actually sympathizes? The lord of the west is capable of that sort of thing?
"I- yes, that's part of it.."
"I know you worry for the group, much more than your own mortal life on many occasions. But know that your well-intended worries are irrational."
And just like that, all of his relatability just went down the drain.
You quirk a brow, "You trying to make me feel better or feel insecure?"
He gives you a look that means 'let me finish'.
"Sorry, continue."
"You forget that you remain under my protection, therefore you won't ever have to fear for your safety, or the others."
He leans down and presses a kiss to the corner of your mouth, his lips gliding across the skin of your face to your ear. "I'll never allow you Naraku to lay a hand on you ever again."
"Hn." You mumble in response, placing a hand on his shoulder. "Is this promise not satisfactory?" His voice rumbles against your skin, though judging by his playful tone, he realizes how sleep deprived you feel right now.
"Thank you. I care for you.. a lot, I don't want anything bad happening to you either."
Sesshomaru places a kiss to your neck and you swear through your tired mind you could feel the imprint of a smile against your skin. "I adore you as well."
Your arms come around his torso as he tries to pull away, and he quirks his brow in return. "Will you stay with me? I.. like it when you're around."
He says nothing as you guide him to the grassy patch next to your sleeping bag, climbing back in yourself. It was probably silly to say the least, the proud lord of the west, who had recently become your lover, was laying next to you as if you were in a middle school slumber party and the bedrolls had just been rolled out.
You loved every second of this though, and with enough serotonin finally going through your veins, you fell into a much needed rest.
______________
In the morning you awoke rejuvenated, though the dog demon laying next to you previously had now seemingly disappeared. You shrugged it off, yawning as the smell of roasted meat wafted through the air.
"Smells good, what's for breakfast Rin?"
"Grilled pork, Sesshomaru handed Master Jaken and I some coin for the village!" Rin held out a small leather purse and jingled the currency within.
"Aww, you left without me?" You fake pouted, secretly happy that they left you to sleep for a bit. "We would have brought you with us, but Lord Sesshomaru instructed us to let you sleep in." Jaken replied with a face full off pork in his mouth.
That was awfully considerate of Sesshomaru, a welcome change compared to his normal stoicism. Perhaps you could thank him for being nice, properly, once you got a few more hours of rest in.
In the mean time, you asked Rin to save you a plate and tucked back into bed, drifting off into a dreamless sleep.