Work Text:
Oda's phone buzzed. He slipped it out of his pocket to find five notifications from the "Drinking buddies!" group-chat: the group-chat between him, Ango, and Dazai.
Every notification appeared to be from Dazai.
Drinking buddies!
Dazai
Odasaku!!!
Dazai
Ango!!!
Dazai
respond!!!
Dazai
pleaseeeeeee :(
Dazai
guys im woke now!!
Dazai, what does woke mean?
Dazai
It means im hella bussin!
huh?
Ango♥
Dazai what are you even saying. please talk normally.
Dazai
Ango ur WACK! This chat is dry AF. Take Ls!!
Dazai, we don't understand what you're saying.
Ango♥
Dazai please talk normally.
Dazai
KK boomer! ur just jealous that u dont know the #slang!!!! Sorry im a kool kid and ur an old man!!
Dazai, im very confused.
Dazai
my pronouns are U/S/A!!!!! :P
Huh? Are you changing your pronouns??
Dazai
CAW!!!!!!!!!!
Ango♥
No, Oda, he's just being a little shit.
???
Dazai
CAW CAW MFS!!! EAT MY DUST!! Tonight at the lupin will be FIRE if you catch my drift fam!! I have tons of tea to spill!!!
Dazai, please explain. What does "tea to spill" mean?
Ango♥
It means he wants to gossip.
Ango♥
Likely about his little gravity boy.
Dazai
EW!!!! don't word it like that :(
Dazai
That slug is straight up WACK!! he's the OPPOSITE of sigma! a total beta.
Dazai
I'm an alpha btw.
Dazai? what does that mean???
Dazai
ur both total skibidi alphas btw!! 🤫🧏♂️
Dazai what do those symbols mean??
Ango♥
Oda, don't encourage him. He'll stop if you ignore him.
Im very confused.
Dazai
Sticking out your gyatt for the rizzler, your so skibidi, your so fanum tax!!!!!
Ango♥
You're*
Dazai
Alpha, this aint no spelling bee!! Go get skibidi'd!!!
?????????
Ango♥
Dazai, please talk normally. If you continue to use odd language, then I personally think it's fair for us both to stop responding. We aren't going to give you a proper answer if we don't understand what you're trying to say. Please cooperate, or don't message at all.
Dazai
I aint reading ALLAT!!!!!
Ango♥
I give up.
I'm sorry Dazai, I just don't understand what you're saying.
Dazai
TAKE LS!!!!!!
Dazai
L+RATIO+BOZO!!!
Dazai
L!!
Dazai
Fam????
Dazai
Fam wyat????
Dazai
FAM!?!??!?! :((
Dazai
Pls responddddd :(
Dazai
Im sorry odasaku :(((
Dazai
and Ango you too IM SORRY!!!!!
Dazai
Plzzzzz
Dazai
PLSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!
Dazai
plz
Dazai
plz
Dazai
plz
Oda sighed as he shoved his phone back into his pocket. It continued to buzz for the next ten minutes.
Dazai could have a very confusing sense of humor at times.