Work Text:
I was walking down that same path I had always gone down, chestnuts falling from the trees around me as I gazed at the blue sky. I was passing by a little farmhouse the public police had set up in, that's when I saw it, or rather him. I didn't recall his name at first, but something drew me towards the young man they had tied up in front of the building, as I walked closer and examined him, that's when I remembered who he was. It was Tok-chae. I hadn't seen him in years, not since two years before the 38th parallel became a battleground. It looked like he was dragged here by the peace policeman who was standing next to him. I sat down near him, lighting up a cigarette as I did. For a moment I simply just sat next to him, puffing out clouds of smoke every so often.
"I'll take this one with me." I said to the policeman, standing up whilst putting a hand on Tok-chae's shoulder. He didn't even look at me, maybe he didn't recognize me, maybe he did, maybe he wanted to hide from the shame of seeing an old friend. The cigarette in my mouth had lost all flavor, my focus was on Tok-chae, he still refused to look at me as we walked. I thought maybe he'd enjoy a smoke, being together with him reminded me of the times we'd used to hide from the adults to light up some leaves...no, I couldn't offer it to him, not to some communist.
As we walked the chestnuts continued to rain down, and that time we stole those very same nuts from the crazy man came rushing back to me. The mad dog caught us of course. I fell out of the tree and got covered in chestnut needles but still ran with Tok-chae as far as we could. I remembered showing my arm to Tok-chae, he pulled out every single one carefully, each one being more painful than the last, so painful it made me cry. By now the cigarette was practically done, I tossed it on the ground and stomped on it, continuing to escort Tok-chae along after disposing of it. We walked and eventually came upon the hill pass where we would cut fodder for the cows together. I stopped walking, pushinging Tok-chae in front of me.
"So how many have you killed?" I said to him, the memories of the past just served as painful reminders, revisiting them made me feel angry. My blood felt like it was boiling, he glanced over at me for a second, I saw it in his eyes, he knew who I was. No answer he gave me.
"How many did you kill?" I said to him louder, I knew he heard me the first time, maybe it was just the regret he felt that made him continue to stay silent, maybe it was the fact that he couldn't handle being held responsible for his actions. He slowly turned to me, facing me with a glare, his mouth twitching a little.
"So you killed a lot I assume? Being a vice-chairmen of the Communist League, why didn't you run? You must have been on a secret mission, right?" I questioned him further, my heart started to beat with rage and uncertainty. "What was your goal? What were you doing here?" As my questions became louder, he walked towards me. I knew it, he was hiding something, he must have been. I tried to look in his eyes but he'd turn away, avoiding every stare I gave him. I was losing my patience, I wanted answers, I needed them. I started to gently grab at the revolver on my side "You're probably gonna get shot anyways, why hide the truth?"
"I'm not going to make any excuses" His words caught me a little off guard, his voice had changed since last I'd heard it
"They made me vice-chairman of the league because I was one of the poorest and I was a hard worker. If that is a crime you are willing to execute me for, then so be it. The only thing I am good at is digging soil." My grip on the revolver loosened, he had changed but it didn't feel like he was some completely different person. It seemed as if he was tired, the stress of his situation eating away at him, something I felt I could relate to.
"My father is bedridden at home. He's been ill for quite some time." Tok-chae's words felt like one's that he had been keeping in for a long time, the anger I felt dissipated quickly and it was replaced by a need to ask more. It had been so long, how much did I miss?
"...Are you married? '' I asked, my voice much softer than it was before. He took a moment to reply "To Shorty." My eyes widened as he revealed her name. Shorty, the same girl we'd pick on as children he had married. "Do you have any kids?" He smiled a little, it looked as if he was reminiscing about his family. "The first one is going to be here in the fall is what she told me."
My first urge was to laugh, so much had gone by and only now was I finding out about it. It didn't feel like I was talking to a traitor anymore...it felt like talking to the same Tok-chae I knew from all those years ago. I fought the urge, suppressing it enough to ask him what was really on my mind.
"Why didn't you run? You know I would have helped you if you came back." He had a look of sadness in his eye as he responded "I tried...I was ready to pick up my father and journey out to the south, but he told me no. He said we couldn't leave the harvest." Tok-chae struggled to get his words out, I continued to listen in with great sympathy. "Besides, a farmer like me had nowhere else to go...and more importantly, I wanted to be with my father when he passed. No one deserves to spend their last moments alone." the words he spoke weighed heavily on him, I could see him struggling to continue. In a cruel twist of fate I remembered my father saying the same thing, except when given the choice, I left my father.
We continued to walk in silence for a while before encountering a field, one full of cranes. Not only was this a neutralized zone along the Parallel, it was also one that reminded me of another memory. Instead of just being a painful reminder of the past, it made me think about a possible solution, even if it only served as a minor distraction from everything. I walked over to Tok-chae, untying his hands. He looked confused, he didn't trust me and I knew it.
"Do you remember when we would make little traps for the cranes? I know it seems silly, but do you think we could do it again?" I asked him hesitantly, worried he might not respond so well to my offer. He turned to me with a smile on his face, one I didn't realize I had missed.
"Just like old times, right Song-sam?" I let out a small laugh as he said those words "Just like old times..."