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"I found a fun thing at one of the racks where people put their finished reads at the library today." Wooyoung said anecdotally as he munched on his sandwich.
"You were at the library?" Yunho questioned, dramatically in disbelief. Wooyoung gave him an unimpressed look.
"I like volunteering at the library and I go there pretty often too, to read and stuff!"
San snorted at Wooyoung's defense. "You mean to look at the pretty librarian," he corrected.
"Well that too. But that's besides the point. I was talking about something before you two decided to assume I was illiterate," he rolled his eyes.
"You're so dramatic."
"Yeah, yeah, anyway, someone read this book called "How To Get with Your Crush" or something, you know, those super cringe guide books on romance and shit. I thought those disappeared after we finished middle school but seeing it in a college library was so weird."
"Do those actually help?" Yunho's interest was somewhat (and somehow) piqued.
"Of course not. I get it if you're desperate but at least go on Reddit or something. It's the 21st century." Wooyoung scoffed.
"There isn't a single fixed formula for love. To even imply that you can get with your crush by just following a stupid book is an insult to the beauty of romance itself!" San, ever the lover of romance.
"You're so dramatic." Wooyoung rolled his eyes at San. They start bickering as they usually do, and Yunho sat quietly between the two.
He pondered San's point about romance. He might be right, but some tips & tricks wouldn't hurt, right?
There was no further explanation on how he ended up in the library, reading said book in a corner that afternoon (after trying to avoid Wooyoung's Cute Librarian and everyone in the library as to not embarrass himself).
-----
And so it began, and then it continued. Up until Yunho found himself in Hongjoong's apartment on a Friday evening, alcohol and snacks laid out on the coffee table as Yunho sits awkwardly on the couch, bouncing his leg while waiting for Hongjoong to return from the bathroom.
He had internalized the book's contents and was ready.
"How did you know I was free for the weekend? I was just about to call you and the others to go hang out before you called me." Hongjoong appeared from the kitchen, holding two glasses. He set them down on the coffee table before flopping down on the couch next to Yunho.
"Lucky guess," Yunho smiled. Acting cool and casual was one of the prerequisites for his strategy he was about to launch. Yunho figured it meant not telling Hongjoong he had asked Seonghwa and some of his other classmates for their schedule or if they had any assignments due for the weekened (Seonghwa gave him a supportive pat on the back and only said, "Good luck. He's a real gremlin when he gets waken up") and researching several other "date" options before settling for a drink at Hongjoong's apartment.
It's a humble one bedroom apartment but it's comfy, especially so with Hongjoong there. Yunho's been here many times, but he's exerting a surprising amount of energy to ignore the fact that he is sweating and feels like he wants to vomit right in front of his crush of five years. Instead, he goes ahead with his plan.
Step One: Make them attracted to you (physically)
Yunho watches closely as Hongjoong makes himself comfortable on the couch. He pours a glass of soju for Hongjoong, and another for himself. Hongjoong takes the glass with a thank you and raises it towards Yunho.
"Cheers to a whole weekend I don't have to spend chasing deadlines!" Hongjoong exclaimed excitedly. Yunho thinks he looks cute even while chugging soju.
He sets his glass down as Hongjoong moves to pour himself another. They drink a few more as they chat about anything and everything. Conversations with Hongjoong has always been easy. They match well, and Yunho loves talking with him.
But he's keeping that first step in mind even as he engages in light conversation with Hongjoong.
"It's getting kind of hot."
Yunho hopes his tone didn't sound too awkward, though he hopes more that he doesn't look too clumsy while removing his jacket. With this sole action's purpose in mind, he had decided to wear a sleeveless black tank top underneath a zip up jacket. (If his biceps flexed as he moved then that was completely accidental.)
He acts causal, but steals a glance in Hongjoong's direction. He's looking. He is, but he's also not. The red on Hongjoong's face can rival the one on Yunho's, but he quickly figured out that they were due to different reasons.
It was then he realized, or remembered, that Hongjoong is a light drinker. Most people are more light-weight than Yunho. Hongjoong was, in constrast, more light-weight than most.
The look in Hongjoong's eyes were kind of distant, yet at the same time like he was looking very intently at whatever he was looking at. Yunho can't decide if it was his body or if Hongjoong just happened to blank-stare in Yunho's general direction. Either way, his resolve had started to crumble a little. But there were still two more steps to go.
"Hyung? You good?" Yunho leaned down a little to get eye-level with Hongjoong, and to somehow cover up while he moves.
"Hm... Yeah." Hongjoong's reply was a little slow and slurred, but he spoke in that breathy soft voice he only does when he was just laughing, or when he's comforting Yunho, or when he's drunk like he is right now. Yunho tries to take it as a win, and decides that now was the right time to move on to the next step.
Step two: Make your crush feel special (flattery compliment them)
"You know, I really like your voice, hyung."
This step was easy, Yunho can go on for days. It's a little more nerve-wracking having to say it directly to Hongjoong himself, but Yunho is known to be more honest with his feelings compared to Hongjoong, so between the two, Yunho has more experience handing out compliments.
"Thanks. I like it too." Hongjoong smiles a smile that squishes his eyes into crescent moons. Yunho thinks his confidence is cool. "If I didn't have it I wouldn't be able to rap and sing, so that'd be pretty sad."
Yunho nods along. "And I think you're very pretty."
Hongjoong looked at him for a few beats without replying.
"You think so? Seonghwa said I look like a gremlin though. When I wake up."
"He did say that."
"He did? He told you? That fucker..." He muttered the last words under his breath, in a pout. Yunho couldn't help but laugh.
"I think you look fine, hyung. You're also very cute. Pocket-sized."
Yunho might've gotten a little bold with that one.
Hongjoong doesn't roll his eyes like he usually does, nor send Yunho a death glare emanating the words "Shut up". Instead, he sighs.
"Yeah. And you're so big. Were you always that tall? Must be nice being tall and handsome."
Thanks to the alcohol, it seems Hongjoong has also gotten a little bolder than usual. Yunho tries not to smile too wide while he can feel his ears turning redder. Yunho gets that often, but when Hongjoong says it, he can't help but feel more special because of it, even if Hongjoong was just saying it like everyone else.
"It hardly matters if I can't put it to use."
Hongjoong giggles. "Why, what're you planning to use it for? You trying to seduce someone with your looks? See, that's what I've been saying, Yunho. You gotta use whatever assets you have to good use!"
Hongjoong's dramatic arm flailing emphasizing his words made Yunho smile. "Yeah. I'm hoping they notice it soon, or notice whatever other "asset" I have that might impress them."
And at that, Hongjoong's smile and arms drop. Yunho couldn't decipher the look on Hongjoong's face before he spoke again.
"Oh. You do have someone." The flat tone and ambiguous sentence left an odd taste in Yunho's mouth.
A quiet "Yeah," was all he could manage. His eyes looked into Hongjoong's with as much sincerity as he could convey, as if thinking that a look could somehow make Hongjoong hear It's you, you're the person
"This person... hasn't noticed? This person doesn't like you?"
"I'm not sure. I haven't asked them."
"Yunho. Whoever this person is, I think they're dumb if they don't like you back. Like, actually stupid. I'm, um... I'm rooting for you."
Yunho wanted to laugh, if he weren't so confused as to what was happening.
Hongjoong had this determined look on his face as he got up and wobbled over the distance between them to give a supportive pat to Yunho's cheeks with his hand (though it felt like an almost slap) and to his back and then pulled him in a hug.
Yunho was unmoving, save for his rapidly beating heart. Hongjoong was not one to initiate physical contact, even when drunk. He only did when he felt Yunho needed emotional support. Yunho felt like crying, both at the once-in-a-blue-moon-hug and at the state he found himself in. How was he going to move on to step three and confess now?
Hongjoong started to feel heavier until Yunho noticed he was sliding off of Yunho because he fell asleep mid-hug. Soft snores tickled Yunho's left ear as he hoisted Hongjoong up.
In the end, Yunho only got to do two out of the three steps, and somehow it had turned his situation even worse than before.
-----
"You're both stupid."
Seonghwa sounded so serious it almost hurt Yunho's pride.
"Why? What do you mean by that?"
Seonghwa sipped on his drink. Yunho stirred his with a straw unenthusiastically. He immediately booked an advice session with trusted consultant and Hongjoong's Best Friend Park Seonghwa the very next day after the incident, and it costed him a very sweet drink and an insult to his face.
"I mean it exactly as I said it. First of all, why the fuck would you read a book on how to win over Hongjoong? You of all people should know he's dense as a rock when it comes to this stuff."
"I mean, I don't know, I was just curious about the book. And a little desperate. And Of course I know, I've been dropping hints for years and he either has never picked them up or he's purposefully doing so." Yunho sighed.
Seonghwa rivaled it with his own, more exhausting-sounding sigh.
"Stupidity number two right there: Have you seen Hongjoong when he's with you? Do you know what he says about you?"
"What does he say about me?"
Seonghwa narrows his eyes. "That you're his favorite! His favorite dongsaeng! And I tried to argue that it means I could still be his favorite friend since I'm older than you and him but all he said was "No," and Mingi almost cried until Hongjoong told him he was his second favorite dongsaeng!"
Yunho can feel his ego inflate a little, but he's trying to stay humble like Hongjoong always tells him to.
"Okay, I'm his favorite, but that doesn't mean he likes me back."
Seonghwa face palms and groans into his hands. "I think it's time you actually find that out for yourself and ask him straightforward."
"Wait, what? I'm not ready!"
"Weren't you ready yesterday when you said your step three or whatever was to confess?"
"I thought by that point Hongjoong would have fallen for me and I would see the signs showing me it's the right time to do it..."
Seonghwa drinks the last of his drink and sets the plastic cup down on the table aggressively. "Well you better get ready and go tell him by the end of this weekend or I might just start biting your fingers off because Hongjoong is hungover and has been crying since this morning because he thinks you like someone else."
And with that, Yunho is left confused, surprised, and stumbling after Seonghwa who doesn't look like he's planning to sit back down and explain his last statement.
-----
For the second time in a span of two weeks, Yunho finds himself back in the library. He tries to get rid of the image of himself reading that godforsaken book.
Fortunately, he's not here to find yet another book but to find Hongjoong. His crush. The love of his life. The man he is about to spill his whole entire heart to, preferably not inside the quiet library because he's not sure he won't break down into a puddle of tears and loud sobbing within the next 15 minutes.
He recognizes Hongjoong's back, sitting on one of the desks facing the large windows. He has a laptop open and some books in front of him, but he seems like he's spacing out, looking at the sky.
"Hi, hyung." Yunho did not currently have the mental capacity to scare and tease him like he usually would, instead he slowly tried to make his presence known from beside Hongjoong.
His effort was in vain, though, because it still startled Hongjoong all the same when he notices Yunho's presence. His eyes widen and he scrambles to cover his laptop and grab the book right beside it, his quick moves resembling a squirrel.
"Y-you're here."
Yunho raises an eyebrow at the odd display of moves, but couldn't quite figure out why Hongjoong looked like he was a cat that had just been caught red-handed stealing fish. "Yep, here I am."
The silence between them was awkward, and rare. Usually, they would flow into conversation easily, but the both of them stayed quiet, not knowing what to say. Yunho couldn't stand it any longer. But that was when he noticed the bright pink book Hongjoong was hugging to his chest.
It was that obnoxious kind of hot pink, and one Yunho would recognize any day. The front part was covered facing Hongjoong, but Yunho knew exactly what it said in big yellow words in a cartoonish font on the cover: How To Get With Your Crush (Super Easy and Effective!!!)
Horror filled Yunho's face and his life flashed before his eyes. This is it. Somehow Hongjoong found out that he read a stupid book to get his attention (and failed doing just that) and now he's going to laugh at Yunho for being such a pathetic loser and never want to be with him ever again.
Hongjoong visibly swallowed, but Yunho doesn't see because he's too busy mourning his pride and future while also trying to find a way out. "So, you wanted to talk about something?" Hongjoong's sweet voice broke him out of his spiral.
"Oh, um. Yes. But I think I can come back later if you're working, I mean it wasn't like important or anything, you seem really busy and stuff so I guess I'll go-"
"Yunho."
Hongjoong's eyes looked at Yunho and it makes him so weak. He had that determined look on him, eyebrows slightly furrowed, lips curled beautifully as if the words that are about to pass through them wouldn't seal Yunho's fate.
"Calm down, you're rambling. And I wasn't busy, I don't have any work this weekened, remember?"
"Oh."
A small smile starts forming itself on Hongjoong's face. He looks beautiful.
"Sit down, silly. You're tall enough on your own, my neck is starting to hurt."
Yunho takes a deep breath and sits down next to Hongjoong as instructed.
"So, what's up? You're all red and you were rambling."
"I heard from Seonghwa hyung. He said you were crying."
At that, Hongjoong's eyes went wide and a blush crept on his face, mimicking Yunho's.
"He's lying. He lies a lot."
"I think he was serious. He also told me the reason."
Hongjoong stayed quiet, so Yunho kept going. It was now or never, so what if Hongjoong rejects him. He'll find a way to get over it later.
"I don't want to jump into conclusions. I also don't want it to be done this way, with me confronting you but not being honest myself. So I'll say it now."
If eyes could convey words, Yunho prayed for the hundredth time, please let my sincerity reach Hongjoong.
"I like you, Hongjoong hyung. A lot, actually. I have since we met, basically, and I've liked you every single day, to this day."
He couldn't stop a smile forming. It felt nice finally saying it out loud. His shoulders feel just as tense as before, and he's still sweating cold bullets and he feels like throwing up a little, but he's said it.
"I think I still will for a long time, whatever your answer is. I think I love you."
Hongjoong had his mouth open since Yunho's first sentence. He looks cute even like this, Yunho thinks.
"That thing I told you on Friday, it wasn't about anyone else. You're the one I'm trying to impress. And I've been trying, I'm... not sure it's been working, but... I even read a freaking book to try and get your attention." He shifts his eyes to the offending book in Hongjoong's clutches. "I think it was that one right there, actually. That's embarrassing."
Hongjoong looks down at the book and back at Yunho, still no sound coming out of him. So Yunho continues. Finally, the third and last step of his strategy is seeing the light of day. I swear I'll make Jung Wooyoung and the author of this book buy me a tub of heartbreak ice cream.
"So, um. If you'll allow it. Can I be your boyfriend?"
The next sequence of actions went by so fast Yunho doesn't even register it until he's hugging Hongjoong tight, and Hongjoong was hugging him.
He noticed a second later that Hongjoong was shaking, and the sound of laughter right in his ear.
Hongjoong pulls away but kept his hands on Yunho's shoulders and laughs fully, openly. It wasn't mocking, nor unpleasant. If anything, he sounded the happiest he had ever sounded, and he looked perfect with his perfect teeth lined up and showed off, eyes turning into crescent moons and the skin around it creased with joy.
"You're so stupid and adorable," he says right after his laughter dies down.
Yunho could rival a tomato with how red his face and ears are, and the speed of his heartbeat could outrun an airplane. He looked at Hongjoong's face with so much hope and expectation and Hongjoong looked right back.
"I-is that a yes?"
"Yes, Jeong Yunho. I would love for you to be my boyfriend, and I'd love to be yours."
Hongjoong planted a kiss on the tip of Yunho's nose and Yunho thinks he might actually die right here in this library, the book that was the catalyst for this whole thing right next to him.
"Did you already know, hyung?" Yunho asked, eyeing the book.
"Of course not. I can't believe Seonghwa fucking told you I cried, though. I need a better best friend."
"I asked him for advice because you thought I liked someone else. He seemed like he was pretty frustrated about the both of us."
Hongjoong rolls his eyes and it landed on the pink book.
He turns to Yunho next. "Did you really read this to confess to me?"
Yunho swallows. "Who told you?"
"You did, dummie, just now. But I actually found out before you told me because Yeosang over there was telling me about how a really tall golden retriever type of guy was trying really hard to hide himself in a corner while reading this and he thought it was funny."
Hongjoong nudged his head at the direction of the librarian sitting at his desk. Yunho turned over and recognized him. The damn Cute Librarian Wooyoung was always gushing about.
Yeosang noticed the two of them staring and sent a small wave and a thumbs up, mostly directing it to Hongjoong.
"He also said his friend Wooyoung told him to look out for a guy with the same exact description I just gave. You're not making enemies out there or anything, are you?"
Yunho sighs. "No, that's just Wooyoung for you."
"Either way, I think it's cute. You're really cute." Hongjoong squished his cheeks with both his hands while saying it. Yunho can't even complain or be mad (he's let it slide for that lucky bastard Wooyoung for now).
Hongjoong removes himself from Yunho's grasp to collect his laptop and bag. He picks up the book with one hand and grabs Yunho's hand with the other.
"Let's go and get dinner together. Our first official date."
The word echoes in Yunho's mind. Date!
"While we walk there, you can tell me about everything you like about me and I'll tell you about all the things that I've liked about you for the past five years." Yunho couldn't believe what he was hearing, but his heart feels like it's about to soar to the sky.
He follows behind Hongjoong, hand still clasped in his, watching the back of Hongjoong's head as they make their way out the library. He stops walking. Hongjoong turns around when he noticed Yunho hadn't moved, and they come face to face to each other, Yunho looking at Hongjoong like he was the most precious thing in the world.
Yunho raised his other hand to cradle Hongjoong's cheek. He leans in, slowly, letting Hongjoong pull back if he wishes to but hoping he won't. Hongjoong looks a little stunned, but follows Yunho's movements.
They find each other's lips, a gentle touch warming the both of them. Yunho would be lying if he said he hadn't imagined this happening before, but the real thing is even better than anything he could've thought up.
When they pull away, Yunho looks at Hongjoong's face, scanning every corner of it like he hasn't already committed it into memory. But he's never been this close before, so he allows himself to stay like that for just a few more seconds, and Hongjoong lets him.
The smiles on both their faces are shy, and Hongjoong giggles after a little bit more face-staring from both sides.
"I guess the book worked after all."