Chapter Text
Chapter 1
Emily put the car in park at the pickup lane of Henry’s high school just as most teenagers began to come out the front doors. She looked at the backseat through the rearview mirror to check on Michael, who since picking him up earlier, has had his headphones in and has been staring at whatever he was playing on his phone. He has been like this all month, since the funeral. Doesn’t talk unless spoken to. Buried in his phone and trying to shut off what’s around him. Emily doesn’t blame the poor kid. How hard it must be to cope with losing his father at this age. Michael never really understood how dangerous his parent’s jobs were. All he knew was they fought the bad guys and always tried to make it home in time for dinner (more often Will than JJ). The 11-year-old didn’t understand that they put their lives on the line every day, until one day, Will didn’t make it home for dinner.
Henry made his way to Emily’s SUV and got in the front seat with a mumbled greeting as Emily was starting back down the road to head to JJ’s house. She has been picking up the boys from school every day since the funeral. They usually took the bus, but since the BAU has been off rotation since the Scarious Case and the resulting internal investigation, the team has been in DC for longer than any of them were used to. And so, Emily has offered to pick up the boys after talking about it with Henry at the funeral.
Emily sat in the vacant seat near Henry at the reception hall. Even though it still baffles Emily how fast Henry has grown into a teenager, his tear-streaked face and lost eyes right now reminded her just how young he really is.
“Have you had anything to eat bud?” She asked him in a hushed tone. He hummed a response that did not really answer her question while staring blankly at the carpet, making Emily realize he didn’t hear her question. “Talk to me buddy, what are you thinking about?” Emily didn’t want to admit she was nervous in this role. Trying to comfort her best friend’s son at his father’s funeral after Will was shot in the line of duty. She knew that JJ was not in the headspace to comfort anyone, too overcome with her own state of grief. Emily chances a glance in JJ’s direction and found her as she left her, head resting on her mother’s shoulder as the older woman whispered empty words of comfort.
“It’s stupid.” Henry finally said. His voice so small that Emily almost didn’t hear it. “Try me.” Emily slightly teased to try and ease the teenager’s discomfort. Henry sighed and finally looked at Emily as he spoke up. “I am not looking forward to the bus ride to school on Monday.” Emily chuckled slightly at his response, not expecting that to be the answer to the young boy’s silent contemplation. “I just mean...” Henry continued “I’m not looking forward to the kids at the bus looking up at me when I walk in because I keep seeing it in their eyes. Mom always says you can tell what people are thinking from their eyes. And all I see in their eyes is ‘here comes the poor kid whose father just died’.” Henry’s eyes found the floor again as he sighed. “I don’t need it, you know. Their pity, anyone’s pity.” Henry finished looking back up at Emily almost accusingly. At this point, Emily willed herself to keep her emotions in check. She didn’t want Henry to feel like she was pitying him. She squared her shoulders back up and took a breath before she decidedly stated without much thought.
“Well, I think I have a solution.”
As Henry was getting situated and putting his backpack in the backseat next to Michael, Emily glanced in his direction for a second to try and gauge his mood. The teenager and her have gotten a bit closer over the past month. Emily felt a sense of pride that Henry was willing to open up to her. The last time Emily was this present in the boy’s life, Henry was too young to really remember. Over the years, Emily limited her role in JJ’s (and Henry’s) life. When JJ and Will finally got married, after the bank heist from hell, Emily realized that she truly lost her chance with the younger woman. Granted, it was her own fault. She never told JJ about her feelings. And so, she made the decision to go to London. When she came back, Henry didn’t really remember her, only knew her as his mom’s boss.
After Will died, Emily told herself that she needed to put aside her own feelings. She broke down the boundaries she placed with JJ because her feelings weren’t important right now. JJ needed her best friend back. JJ needed someone to help her put the pieces of her life together. It started with Emily offering to drop off and pick up the boys. This led to her finding out that JJ was in no state to take care of herself, and so, Emily would stay at JJ’s and help with cooking for the boys and started helping out around the house. Emily’s heart would break every time she would go into the blonde’s bedroom and find her buried under the comforter in the darkness. Emily knew that JJ needed time to heal from the sudden loss of her husband, whose life was wrongfully stolen from him for no real rhyme or reason. That loss is impossible to rationalize, and Emily understood that.
“I got some groceries with me, have you boys had lunch, or do you want me to make something when we get you home?” Emily asked the boys even though she knew only Henry could really hear her. “I had a small lunch a couple hours back.” Henry answered while looking out the window. Emily knew that Henry was still somewhat hesitant to accept Emily’s help even now. Emily knew that it wasn’t because he was uncomfortable with the grey-haired agent, it was because he felt guilty. He knew his mom was in bad shape. even though Emily has taken on a lot of responsibilities of helping take care of them while trying to comfort her blonde best friend, he knew that Emily didn’t have to do all of this for them. She was their mom’s boss; it was not really part of the job description for the Section Chief.
“Are you sure? I did get all the makings for a mean lasagna. I haven’t made it in forever and was really craving it. Really, you would be doing me a favor if you would share it with me” Emily said teasingly with a smirk on her face. And seeing the small smile that slowly appeared on the teenager’s face, she knew she was about to break his resolve. “Okay fine, but you owe me.” He quipped back at her. Emily just chuckled, satisfied with that answer as she continued the drive.
The car fell silent for a couple minutes until Henry spoke up again. “She didn’t get up from bed when we woke up again.” Emily sighed and looked towards Henry to find him fiddling with his fingers. She knows the young blonde is worried about his mother. JJ’s grief was evidently still raw, she hasn’t really talked about it since the night after Will died.
Emily was breaking every traffic law known to man to make it to the hospital. JJ called her frantically to tell her that Will was shot while chasing down a suspect and was in critical condition. Emily immediately got in the car and drove to be there by the blonde’s side at her time of need. By the time Emily was turning the hallway to make it to the waiting room, she heard JJ’s scream. She rushed to the blonde as she caught up to JJ and the doctor just as the blonde was about to collapse on the floor. Emily held on to JJ for dear life as the blonde began sobbing frantically. The doctor mumbled a small “I’m so sorry for your loss” before leaving the women, not knowing how to help them.
Emily maneuvered the crying agent to a nearby bench and sat her down while JJ clutched at Emily’s shirt as she sobbed. Emily stroked the blondes arm comfortably while whispering comforting words repeatedly. “I’m right here JJ.” “I’m so sorry.” “I got you.”
By the time Emily was driving JJ back home, the blonde had worn herself out. Emily called Sandy, JJ’s mother, earlier to pick up the boys and take them to her house. Emily parked her SUV in JJ’s driveway and looked to the side to find that JJ was asleep. Emily took a breath and decided to give herself a minute before waking her up. Emily was on autopilot since she got JJ’s call. She hadn’t thought about anything other than being there for the blonde. She knew that JJ’s nightmare has just started and decided then that she will do anything and be anything the blonde needs to get through this.
“Jen, wake up honey, we’re home.” Emily softly spoke as she gently put her hand on JJ’s shoulder. The blonde stirred slowly and said nothing. She took off her seatbelt and slowly opened the door but didn’t get out. “I can’t go in there.” JJ was staring blankly at her home. The home she shares with her husband… shared with her husband.
“I’m going to walk in and look into the living room thinking he’s on the couch watching TV. that he would get up and steer me to the kitchen to eat and talk about our day and joke about the kids. But I know when I go in and find the house empty, it going to be like hearing it for the first time.” She sobbed as she spoke. “I’m not ready to go into the house and find it empty, Emily. I’m not ready to be in that house all alone.” She started to cry uncontrollably, and Emily immediately got out of the car and ran to the passenger side. Emily opened the door wider, and JJ immediately put her arms around Emily’s waist and buried her head in her chest as Emily stood next to her and stroked her hair.
“You’re not alone Jennifer. I got you. I won’t let you be alone ever; I promise.”