Work Text:
Steve couldn’t believe that Bucky was here.
He couldn’t believe that this was real, that this was really happening. His best friend, his pal, and the person he’d known longer than anyone, and the one person he loved more than anyone in the entire world, was here.
“Buck…do you remember me?” Steve asked, looking down at Bucky, who was still trapped in that vice. Bucky looked up at Steve, so open and broken, but so relieved – he remembered himself and the past, he remembered Steve.
“Your mom’s name is Sarah. You used wear newspapers in your shoes,” Bucky said, and though his voice was shaking, he looked up at Steve, feeling his heart swell, because damn it, he remembered.
Steve’s face crumpled, his eyes glazed over with tears, the smile on his face cracking, so bittersweet and nostalgic, loving but pained.
“I’ll give you a minute,” Sam said softly, stepping out, “I’ll go call Scott.”
Steve gave Sam a reassuring nod, before turning back to Bucky, who was looking up at the blond, with his open, deep blue eyes, a soft smile playing on his lips.
“Steve.”
That was enough to make Steve crack, he stepped forwards and fell to his knees in front of Bucky, desperately wanting to touch him, but not sure if he should. His heart felt like it was about to burst out of his chest, he wanted to hug and hold Bucky, but kiss him and tell him how much he loved him, and also, not say anything at all, to just be there with him.
“Bucky.”
Bucky smiled then, properly, broken but happy, tears swarming in his eyes, “Stevie, it’s me.”
His heart was racing in his chest; he could feel all of those years of being apart, all that pain, all of Hydra and everything they made him do, weighing down on him. His Steve was here, his baby blue eyed and golden blond haired friend, his bright smile and big heart, the man who defended everyone with everything he had, even when he was too small.
“Hey, hey, pal,” Bucky said, dipping his head, to catch Steve’s teary eyes, tears trickling down his cheeks, “I’m right here, right here bud.”
Steve’s face crumpled again, his lips trembled, unable to speak.
Bucky loved him then and he loved him now, he was bigger, muscled and heroic, he was Captain America, he was the soldier everyone loved, with the large, powerful, loving heart. And yet, he was the same Steve, his Stevie, his best friend, the love of his life (though he hadn’t ever told him), the one that he’d die for, the one he’d live the rest of his life for, the one he’d marry, the one he’d protect and defend for as long as he lived and breathed.
For as long as there was air in his lungs, as long as his heart was beating and his brain was working, he would love Steve.
He’d always love Steve.
“You’re a wanted man,” Steve mumbled, his voice breaking, it was the only thing he could say – the words just tumbled out of his mouth, “but that’s not your fault. It’s Hydra. And I-I please don’t blame yourself. I just –
“Stevie,” Bucky said softly, “it’s okay…I don’t do that anymore – I know who I am now, I –
Steve shook his head, frowning, angry, “no you never did it. It wasn’t you. It was never you. It was Hydra, all Hydra. Not you, you are not a killer. You’re my…my best friend.”
“Steve –
“No,” Steve cut him off, voice cracking again, “no, no, you’re not a killer. You’re not…it’s not your fault. You didn’t hurt anyone. It wasn’t your fault. It was Hydra.”
Bucky sighed deeply, relented and nodded, “okay, Stevie. Okay.”
Steve let out a choked, broken noise, finally allowing himself to break down, sobbing, his whole body shaking, “you fell, Bucky. Y-you fell from the train and I couldn’t save you. I couldn’t stop you from fallin’, I-I watched you –
“Steve,” Bucky said softly, nudging his nose against Steve’s forehead, “look at me, c’mon look at me pal.”
Steve peered up at Bucky through his tears, “I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry, Bucky. I’m so sorry. I-I, God, I’m – I – Buck –
“Stevie,” the darker haired male whispered, “it’s okay, Steve. It’s okay, I’m okay…I’m here now. We’re both here now, eh?”
“Is it?” Steve asked, broken, “is it okay? Everythin’ is fallin’ apart…Tony and –
“Hey, hey,” Bucky said, lifting his free hand to finally touch Steve, “we’ll figure it out…together, like we always do, ‘till the end of the line.”
Steve whimpered, a soft, quite noise escaping his lips, then, resting his forehead against Bucky’s, their noses touching, “’till the end of the line…”
It was like falling.
No, it was like being on fire, like flames eating at his flesh. Like falling into a dark pit, like forgetting everything that made him human, alive, real, it was like not being able to see, or hear, or control anything around him. He couldn’t do anything.
He couldn’t feel anything, but the awful pain in his stomach.
He could feel the bullets twisting and turning in his skin, the shooting, agonising pull they had on his body, like knives cutting into his flesh, as the blood pooled on his clothes and on the floor. It was an excruciating pain, unlike anything he’d ever felt before.
His heart felt like it was about to explode.
He wanted to die. He wanted it to end. He couldn’t handle the fire burning, gruelling pain that sought to rip him apart.
And then he can feel arms wrapping around him and a familiar sight clouds his sight. He knows it’s not Crossbones, because he can see the son of bitch lying in the corner, barely conscious. Instead, it was those lush, dark locks, blue eyes, and that broken smile, that smile that told him everything was not okay, that everything was awful, but it was the smile that kept him going, that he loved.
“Steve, look at me, you need to stay awake. Steve, look at me, c’mon pal, look at me.”
Steve’s eyes lifted to meet the wide, fearful ones that were looking down at him, “Bucky?”
“Hey, hey,” Bucky managed a terrified smile, his voice shaking, speaking into the intercoms quickly, “I need backup. Steve’s down.”
Then, he looked down at Steve, applying pressure to his wounds, voice breaking, “Steve, I’m here. I’m here. Steve, you need to stay awake, please keep your eyes open. It’s gonna be okay. Everythin’ is all right. Okay?”
Bucky manoeuvred around Steve, putting him flat on his back, tearing a piece of his uniform to wipe up Steve’s blood as best he could, crying now, “it’s okay Stevie. It’s okay. I’ve got you. Help is coming.”
And then, Bucky wrapped his wounds with limp pieces of fabric, trying to minimise the bleeding, keeping pressure on the wounds, “I need you keep pressure on that, Steve. Okay?”
Steve’s eyes drooped, a gasp leaving his bloodied lips, “B-Buck I’m…sorry, I-I’m sorry. I-I failed. I failed you again.”
Bucky’s heart broke, because even after all of these years, they just kept losing, he wasn’t going to, not again, never again, holding onto him, tears streaming down his cheeks, mixing with his own blood, and Steve’s, “no, you didn’t. You didn’t Stevie.”
“I-I promised I’d look out for ya, t-that we’d clear your name,” Steve croaked, blood trickling from his lips and nose, eyes wide and open, staring at Bucky with tears mingling with his blood and sweat, “I f-failed. They’re g-gonna arrest us all. I’m gonna lose ya again.”
“No, Steve, no,” Bucky shook his head, holding Steve close, putting pressure on his bloody stomach, “no, you didn’t fail. You didn’t. Everythin’ is gonna be fine. It will gonna be okay. I promise, I’ve got you now, pal. I’m here.”
Steve can feel the blood bubbling in his mouth now, as his heart stutters, “I-I’m not gonna make it, Buck. I’m – Bucky I need to – tell you somethin’ –
“No, Steve, you need to save your breath,” Bucky said firmly, gently, trying to keep his eyes off the blood that was coating his hands, Steve’s, his pal’s blood, the one he loves.
“No, I need – need to say this,” Steve choked, “I-I love you Buck. I always have. I j-just couldn’t tell yo-you. I messed up. I messed up, I –I can’t save you…I couldn’t before and I –I can’t this time…I’m sorry –
“Stevie,” Bucky whispered, tears falling down his cheeks, “I love you too. I love you too so much. We’re gonna be fine pal. We’re gonna be fine. Everthin’ is gonna be okay. Stay with me, stay with me, sweetheart. Don’t give up on me, Steve.”
Steve just stared wide eyed up at Bucky, unable to speak, gasping, just a broken Tony rounded around the corner.
Bucky clung onto Steve, holding him close, glaring at Tony, “don’t come near him. Don’t you fuckin’ dare – get out! Get out, get the fuck out!”
Tony looked at a Steve barely conscious, “Steve.”
Bucky clung onto Steve, trying to keep him alive, until backup came, watching Tony, as he wordlessly stumbled across the room, grabbing Bucky’s discarded gun (one he didn’t even remember dropping), and shot Crossbones in the head.
And then he fell to his knees, eyes locked on Steve’s, “I’m sorry, grandpa. I’m so sorry.”
“I-I had him on the ropes,” Steve croaked, looking from Tony to Bucky, eyes closing.
“I know you did, bud, I know you did,” Bucky sobbed into Steve’s shoulder, just as Sam and backup turned up to save them.
The first thing Steve feels when he wakes up is the hand in his own.
The second thing he notices is the colour of the room, it’s bright, a hospital room.
And then, he turned his head to the side, to see Bucky sitting there, asleep with his face on Steve’s pillow, sitting in the chair by his bed.
“…Bucky…?” Steve croaked, trying to raise his voice, “Buck.”
“…Stevie?” the darker haired male opened his eyes, relief flooding his features, beginning to tear up, “Stevie, oh God, Stevie.”
Steve managed a half smile, “hey, jerk.”
Bucky chuckled, half broken, half light, “you stupid, punk…you stupid, stupid, punk.”
“I’m sorry, Buck,” Steve said softly, tearing up as well, “I’m so sorry. I didn’t – I failed you. I – I did this to you. And Tony and –
“Hey, hey,” Bucky whispered, cupping Steve’s face, “it’s okay. We’re all okay. You didn’t fail Stevie, you won. It’s all been sorted.”
Steve crumpled, sobbing in Bucky’s arms, not caring that at that exact moment the rest of the team were watching. He just didn’t care.
“I love you, Buck. I love you.”
Bucky smiled through his own tears, kneeling by Steve’s bed, pressing a soft, chaste kiss on the blond’s lips, because fucking finally, that needed to happen, “I love you too, Stevie. I love you too.”