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Akaashi Keiji did not know what to do anymore.
It had been two whole months since the first incident. Two months since the time he had been sitting next to Bokuto in the locker room before a game, fiddling with his fingers. He wasn’t used to opening up, but something about Bokuto just felt… safe. Like he was someone who would actually listen and understand him. Though he had trustful friends in the past, there was something different about Bokuto Koutarou, the man with endless energy whose smile shined brighter than all of the stars in the galaxy. For Akaashi, it finally felt as though there was finally someone who cared enough to listen. And so, Akaashi spoke.
“I’m nervous,” he admitted, gulping down his anxieties as the words left his mouth. “I don’t know. I just don’t want to mess up and cost us the game.”
“Hm.” Bokuto leaned farther back on the bench, looking up at the ceiling with an expression that Akaashi couldn’t quite place.
“I’m sorry for bothering you with all this,” Akaashi sighed. “Thank you for listening, Bokuto-san.”
“Yeah of course,” he replied, eyes fixated on the ceiling. Akaashi couldn’t tell if he had been truly paying attention, as his far-out stare gave away his obvious attention issues, and lack of response only added further to Akaashi’s hypothesis.
He breathed and stood up. “Guess we should get–”
“You know, ‘Kaashi, there’s this thing for good luck that we could do so that you don’t have to worry anymore! Or just, worry less!”
“Oh?” Maybe he had been listening. “What is it?”
Standing up, Bokuto gently grabbed the sides of Akaashi’s face and planted a short, quick peck onto his lips. It wasn’t anything extraordinary, and as quickly as he had latched on his hands were right back at his sides, a big, unknowing smile spread across his face. Compared to Akaashi’s beet-red cheeks and hands twitching up by his chest, Bokuto had looked extremely, positively normal. And though his reaction was quite alarmed, Akaashi wouldn’t– or rather, couldn’t say he didn’t like it.
“Good luck kiss! Me and my old teammates did it all the time!” Bokuto cheered, crossing his arms over his chest. “Alright, let’s go kick some ass!!”
Akaashi stood in silence before running out the doors behind Bokuto. He didn’t speak a word of what had just happened.
Ever since then, Bokuto had been uncharacteristically chipper. Sure, he had always had more energy than a hummingbird and his face constantly sported that same, stupid smile, but there was something new to it now. No longer did he experience his “emo modes” as Akaashi had liked to call them, there was a sense of consistency in his actions that wasn’t there before the incident. At some point along the way, Akaashi pinpointed that the routine of it all must have been helping him keep his cool.
So, he kept up the “good luck” kisses. For Bokuto’s sake, that is. And he never questioned them. Before every game, before and after every practice, when Bokuto would walk him home, all instances were accompanied by a quick peck on the lips.
Then came the stargazing together. Naturally, after that it was holding hands on the walk home together, sneaking little passing glances when the other wasn’t looking, giggling after the other squeezes their hands together.
Akaashi had been wary of all of this, sure, but he couldn’t deny himself the pleasure of spending this sort of time with Bokuto. He’d be lying if he said he didn’t find quite a bit of joy in all of this, that he hadn’t been reciprocating the kisses or the “dates” or the hand-holding. However, there was a bit of uncertainty that gurgled up in his stomach when he caught Bokuto staring at him as if he wasn’t quite sure how to interpret it. Bokuto was no idiot, he must have known how he was coming across every time he brushed his thumb against Akaashi’s palm.
The straw that broke the camel’s back came not in the presence of any game, but at Bokuto’s house late one night watching TV on his bed. Akaashi had been sat up against the edge of the bed, reading glasses on as he attempted to make sense of the chemistry on the paper in front of him. Without a single word uttered between the two of them, Bokuto slid his arm around Akaashi and pulled him closer, hand reaching around his waist.
Startled, Akaashi straightened his posture and picked his head up, subsequently smacking Bokuto in the chin with a loud “BUMP”.
“Owww, ‘Kaashi!” Whined the idiot (Akaashi’s words).
He breathed in, keeping his composure. “Bokuto-san, what are you doing?”
Bokuto blinked. “Good luck cuddles! To help you with your homework!”
A deep silence filled the room as Akaashi stared through Bokuto’s eyes, trying desperately to pick at his mind. He watched as Bokuto’s eyes darted around the room, eyebrows shooting up with a tinge of nervousness.
“Bokuto-san. I have a question for you. And you can’t give me a bullshit answer.”
Bokuto batted his pretty white eyelashes and twiddled his thumbs. “Okay.”
“What’s up with the kissing, and the dates, and the hand-holding, and now the cuddling?”
“It’s for good lu–”
“And don’t say it’s for good luck because it’s too far now. This is way past ‘good luck’. It’s always been past good luck.”
Bokuto looked Akaashi in the eye but wasn’t able to maintain the stare for long as he quickly shifted his gaze to the ground, hands glued to the back of his head.
Akaashi raised an eyebrow, seemingly unconvinced, even with his lack of response. “Well?”
“Did you not like it?” His question was so innocent, so curious, and filled with respect that it took Akaashi aback. His posture returned upright, and he brought his hands to his knees. He did not respond.
“Well?” Bokuto returned.
“I asked you first.”
“So you did like it–.”
“Bokuto-san.”
Bokuto huffed, cheeks filling with air like a bothered toddler. “I didn’t know how to tell you, so I did the first thing I could think of. And then I couldn’t stop it! It’s like when you hold the end of a balloon and watch it deflate.”
Akaashi, keeping his blue eyes locked onto Bokuto’s golden counterparts, took both of Bokuto’s hands in his own. “Tell me what?”
His face flushed. “Augghh!!! I can’t say it!”
With a quick smile, Akaashi tilted his head down. “Well, I can gather what you’re thinking, but, if you still want to tell me out loud–,” he leaned in close and, tilting his head slightly to the left, planted a small, slow, kiss onto Bokuto’s lips, squeezing his hands slightly as he did so. “Here’s a good luck kiss.”
Their routine stayed the same. Small pecks before and after practice, before every game, holding hands on the walk home from school, small dates on their days off. But there was no more uncertainty in the mind of Akaashi Keiji. He didn’t need good luck to know that he was deeply in love with Bokuto Koutarou, and Bokuto the same with him.