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The Birds, the Bees, and the Bats

Summary:

Written for a kinkmeme prompt. Omega!Charles is teaching sex ed. The questions in the post lecture discussion were provided by readers.

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Charles smiles brightly out at his class, because there's no reason to be awkward. They of course tend to disagree, with Alex slouched low in his seat with his leather jacket like armor, and Hank hidden behind his usual stack of books. Sean is squirming while Angel is utterly calm, filing her nails and waiting for him to begin. Darwin is his usual easy-going self, turning to a fresh page to take any notes he might need.

"Well, the day has come, as you all knew it would." This is the second sex ed class, designed to go more in depth and to prepare everyone for the crashing madness of heat, as if anything really could. Charles pulls the first of his diagrams down. "We'll be starting with Beta biology, both because it forms the basis of Alpha/Omega dynamics, and because they're so neglected in popular culture." Everyone looks at Angel, of course. She's the only Beta in the room, and maintains her calm interest. "As you can see," Charles says, gesturing to the diagram, "the Beta female is built almost exactly like her Omega sister. The external genitalia are precisely the same, and the vagina, cervix, and fallopian tubes are identical. The main distinctions are the lack of Harrington's glands, hypotonic tying musculature, the hypoactivity of the ovaries, and the underdeveloped womb."

"What does hypotonic mean again, Professor?" Darwin asks, making a note of it.

"Oh, lacking tone. The musculature is there, it's just not as strong because Beta males don't have knots to hold onto."

"...So, Beta chicks do have ovaries?" Sean is always willing to ask the stupid questions, bless him.

"Of course we do!" Angel rolls her eyes. "And they even have eggs, we just don't drop them."

"Less technical than my answer would have been, but completely correct."

"Yeah, but why?" Alex this time. "I mean, they don't carry..."

"Hormonal balance," Hank mutters.

"Precisely. They maintain the Beta female's external feminization, as well as helping with mood and overall health." He moves to the male diagram. "Like the Beta female, the male is externally almost identical to his Omega counterpart. Internally, however, he's built more like an Alpha, with a true anus rather than a cloaca, and no womb."

"Weiirrd," Alex mutters, and Angel glares at him.

"No weirder than any of the rest of it, Alex. Like the female's ovaries, the Beta male's testicles serve their endocrine if not their reproductive function." He taps the relevant portion of the diagram with his pointer, and ignores Sean's giggling. "At some point in the far, far past, we were all what we would call Betas today. The cause of humanity's shift to a dynamic species is still unknown, but now that we have, Betas are infertile." Angel smirks. "And yes, that does mean they can screw around without worrying about pregnancy." He shakes an admonitory finger at her. "But they still get venereal disease."

Alex cackles, and Charles waits for him to stop before going on. "Back to the infertility, Betas actually become fertile if population levels dip too far. Beta couples that want biological children have a good success rate with isolation, which can also trigger the change. The female becomes an Omega, and the male an Alpha."

Hank is scribbling notes, fascinated. Charles gives them some more information and some history, and then switches to the Omega diagram. Everyone's ears prick up because of course they know Charles is an Omega, with his sweet scent and the heat leaves he and Erik take. "As I said before, the female Omega and Beta are very much alike. On this diagram you can see the Harrington's glands that activate during heat. They provide less lubrication than the male set because less is needed, but the hormone mix is the same. The womb is fully developed, and the ovaries are active."

Pointing to the male diagram, he steels himself for embarrassing questions. "The Omega male is a much greater departure, as you can see." Alex slouches down farther, the kind of macho young Omega who has not at all made peace with the idea of coming into heat. "Externally the same from the front, an Omega male can be distinguished from a Beta by his cloaca."

Alex grimaces. "Isn't that like, seriously unsanitary?"

"Cloaca may mean 'sewer', but it's a bit misleading." Charles points out a structure at the base of the large intestine. "This is Hollis's valve, which blocks the alimentary tract off from the reproductive one during heat and labor."

"...So, do you get backed up?" Sean asks, and the entire class giggles.

It's best to be frank, Charles supposes. "Occasionally, but one of the primary symptoms of oncoming heat is a loss of appetite. It will be especially noticeable on the first one." He chuckles, settling on his desk and remembering. "I was sixteen, (which is pretty much dead average, by the way) and went from eating like a hole one day to having a single leaf of lettuce and one strawberry for lunch the next."

"What are the other signs?" Alex asks, sounding a bit worried.

"It varies widely, but the gold standard is lack of appetite combined with a low-grade fever and no malaise. Very common symptoms are insomnia, a sudden beginning of or uptick in erotic dreams, and paranoia."

"Paranoia?" Sean frowns. "That doesn't make any sense."

"Well, from an evolutionary perspective, it serves to ensure that the Omega will only allow trusted Alphas anywhere near." He stands again. "Of course, all of these symptoms are variable. Many people still get mild ones well into adulthood."

"Do you, Professor?" Hank asks, peering over the books.

"Sometimes. Alas, the one I tend to manifest the most is the paranoia."

"…So that's why you were all jumpy two weeks ago?" Sean cocks his head, and Charles sighs.

"I tried not to be obvious about it."

"What about after heat, professor?" Hank again, and Charles blinks at him. "What do you mean?"

Hank blushes. "You always seem to have backache when you come back from your leave."

Charles hopes to god he won't blush as well. "Well, that's due to what's technically called lordosis behavior."

"What?" Alex stares, and Charles has to laugh.

"It's just the inevitable result of getting a little overzealous in one's instinctive responses, and usually sorts itself out in a day or so."

"Yeah, but what is it?" Alex flushes, not nearly as good as Sean at asking silly questions.

"Well, arching the lower back allows for a better tie, but keeping your back like that for too long will leave you a bit sore. It's nothing to worry about. Any more questions before we move on to the Alpha diagrams?"

"Uh…" It's Alex again, "How bad is it?"

"The first one? Usually pretty terrible. But after that you can go on suppressants."

Alex grimaces, but doesn't say anything else. Hank does. "Professor?"

"Yes, Hank?"

"Is it true about Omegas being emotionally needy while in heat, or is that acculturated?"

"Hm. That's a good question, Hank. Every Omega is different, you see."

"…Could you cite your own experiences?"

And there's such honest scientific curiosity in the question that Charles steels himself to answer it. "Well… It can take you in different ways. Some Omegas get very anxious about their attractiveness, some get extremely jealous. I fall more under the umbrella of clinginess. I usually need a fair amount of time spent alone, but on the three main days of my heat I absolutely cannot stand it, and something like sixty-five percent of Omegas polled have reported the same. Since Alphas tend to become ridiculously overprotective during heat, I'm beginning to think it evolved to lessen marital discord."

"How does Professor Lensherr deal with it?" Alex asks, and all of them look bewildered with the effort of picturing their formidable History teacher being soft in any way.

Charles laughs. "Fairly well, on the whole. He blends fresh-squeezed juices to keep me hydrated and defends me from the vile overtures of the postman."

Angel giggles. "Really?"

"He's actually rather pretty, and I made the mistake of mentioning it once, over a year ago. You see what I mean about overprotectiveness."

Charles gives it another moment, then pulls down the last diagrams. "Right, then. Alpha physiology. The Alpha female is the greatest departure from the base template, as you can clearly see." He gestures at the diagram. "Externally, she looks just the same as the others. You can really only tell unaroused women apart by scent. However, the vagina is much shorter, and of course doesn't end in a cervix, because the Alpha female has no womb. Instead, the tip of her penis rests about here when not erect. The whole thing is sheathed internally, the knot carried up where the womb would be in a Beta or Omega, and when aroused this set of ligaments tightens and shifts the whole thing out. She has the same locking muscle as an Omega, which helps to keep her penis out for the duration of the tie. Her fallopian tubes route out through it."

"Always said they were lucky," Darwin says, making a quick copy of the diagram, making sure to get the ligaments right.

Hank blinks. "Lucky?"

Darwin shrugs. "They get a cock and a clit, I call that lucky."

Charles laughs so hard he has to sit on his desk again. "And again you prove yourself to be a gentleman and a scholar, Darwin. It's true, ounce for ounce they do have the most erogenous tissue of all six sexes, but it's not the size of the boat but the motion of the ocean, which you would all do well to remember." Everyone snickers at this, and Charles moves on to the male diagram. "The Alpha male has the same internal workings as a Beta, only his testicles are fully active. On the outside of course is the knot, which averages something like a quarter of its expanded size while flaccid. Some shrink more than that, and can be almost indistinguishable from Betas, but there are always two lines to delineate the knot, however faint. Also, the foreskin tapers, but of course on a circumcised Alpha this literal reference point is gone."

"That'd be Professor Lensherr, right?"

"Why yes, he is one of the chosen people," Charles says mildly, giving Angel a Look. "Anyway, while the Omega is famous for going into heat, what most people don't realize is the extent of the physiological changes the pheromones given off cause in the Alpha. We'll get into the brain chemistry later if I think you need some good, dry, boredom to calm you down, but for now we'll limits ourselves to the effects of those changes."

It's not as hard as it might be. Charles stays clinical as he points out the glands and the tissues they alter, and the difference in Omega elasticity and Alpha knot size at different points in the mating cycle. He always times this class to be as far away from his own heat as it can be.

"The Omega goes into heat, and becomes physiologically and psychologically ready to mate, which is to say, rather needy and very horny. The Omega broadcasts this state of affairs with the release of pheromones from certain designated patches of skin. Should you be an Omega or find yourself very intimate with one, you can examine these spots and see how different they are from others. Behind each ear, inside each upper thigh and around the vaginal or cloacal opening are patches of glaborous skin—"

"Glaborous, teach?"

"Hairless, Alex. Glaborous just specifies that the state is natural to the skin." Alex nods, writing it down. "Each of these patches feel very smooth, and slightly greasy. This grease is much thicker in adolescence, and kids have scrubbed themselves raw trying to contain it. Do not do this. Come see me, there are specific products for overproduction of Omega wax, which is the lay term."

"So what's it for?" Darwin asks.

"It serves as a base, to make the pheromones more pungent and longer-lasting. So, when an Omega is in heat and throwing off their particular scent, compatible Alphas nearby will be affected. Siblings nearly always smell vile to one another, which of course helps to prevent inbreeding. A compatible Alpha will find the scent very pleasant, and will begin to change in response. The scent is a large part of what's happening, but there's also the vomeronasal organ, which is specifically for detecting pheromones. We all have one and it reacts to various signals throughout our lives, but the Alpha has the greatest physical feedback. Pheromones stimulating the VNO cause all the changes of rut. Physically, the Alpha's gonads step up gamete production and swell. Most Alphas report this as pressure or aching if they feel it at all, so sharp pain should always be reported. At the same time the knot swells, and in the case of female Alphas the whole affair drops, preparing to fully descend for sexual activity. The Alpha's pheromone production is also increased, so the Omega can scent for compatibility. While an Omega in heat is desperate in general, they always express a preference for compatible or known Alphas." He pauses, letting people catch up with their notes. "And of course, psychological changes. While Omegas become needy, Alphas become possessive. Or so society tells us. Really, each side of the dynamic experiences both, but the fabled Alpha aggression is a very real thing. An experienced Omega can simply choose quickly or do any number of other things to defuse a fight in the making, but if no one involved keeps a clear head it can get very ugly." He stops again, going over his notes, and glances at the clock. "Any more questions?"

"Yeah," Alex says. "How come you can't go on suppressants before your first heat?"

"Because they need to be tailored for you." Charles sits on his desk again. "Just about everyone can use FeverFree, but some people are allergic and need less common drugs, and the dosage and supplementary chemicals have to be balanced exactly. Only after an a natural heat are your own unique Omega markers in place. In desperate situations Feverfree by itself can be used on the first heat, but effectiveness is low and adverse reactions are common. If you very much do not want to endure your first heat, sedatives are much safer. You'll still be in heat, but you'll sleep through a lot of it and care less about the rest."

"Professor?" Hank raises his hand, of course.

"Yes?"

"What about sick Omegas? Do they go into heat?"

"Depends on the Omega, and how sick they are. If it's just a little cold or something, heat goes on as normal. More intense illnesses tend to delay it, but not by much. I went into heat the day I was able to get out of bed from a bad bout of flu, once. That was awful, but I had Professor Lensherr to look after me by then." He tries not to sound too fond, but it's hard, because Erik had been so incredibly tender with him, taking him gently and bathing the sweat and slick from his body, using fingers and toys to give Charles more orgasms with less physical strain, keeping him hydrated and tempting him with tiny morsels of food to help him get his strength back. "Chronic and terminal illnesses have their own effects on heat, and some drugs have suppressive functions as a side effect. Generally, a gravely ill Omega won't go into heat, and prolonged starvation and high levels of stress hormones will suppress it as well."

"Professor," Angel asks, "What are the different methods of birth control again?"

"Oh, c'mon, Angel!" Sean rolls his eyes.

"Of course rubbers, but the other stuff!"

"As Sean says, there are condoms, which come in Alpha and Beta shapes and all kinds of sizes and flavors, and Omega ones which will work for Beta women as well as Omegas. Condoms work against both pregnancy and disease, while the pill prevents gamete implantation but does nothing for disease. As a young Omega who wants to stay healthy and childless, stacking methods is generally the best. There are also gamete-killing jellies and foams which are contraceptive-only, transdermal implants that are like a long term version of the short-acting pill, and there's also a cervical ring… I have a whole pamphlet, remind me to give you each a copy on your way out."

"Professor?"

"Yes, Sean?"

"Uh, is it true you can tell the size of an Alpha's knot by the size of their nose?"

Everyone laughs. "No, Sean, you can't, convenient as that would be."

"…Does it hurt to be tied?" Alex mutters, almost lost in the shuffle.

"Not unless there's an extreme size disparity, and sometimes not even then. Even at a low points in the cycle the cloaca is very elastic. Much like a vagina, it's tough and delicate at the same time. Go slowly at first, use plenty of lubrication, and you should be able to take any knot that's not a record-breaker."

"How do you know when you're compatible?" Darwin asks.

"Oh, that's a pheromone thing. It's at least partially regulated by genetic diversity. Omegas more different from yourself will smell better to you, as a general rule. Beyond that, it's a matter of personal taste and emotions, with different people preferring different notes. You've scented them before, musk and sweetness and spice. It's all very idiosyncratic, though changes in diet can emphasize different aspects of one's personal scent."

"You said an Omega could defuse an Alpha fight," Sean says, "how does that work?"

"Again, that depends on the Omega. A very inexperienced or submissive Omega can either run away altogether, which will work unless the Alphas hate each other personally (in which case it's not the Omega's problem), or throw themselves into their preferred Alpha's arms, crying and whimpering and begging to be taken care of. If the Alpha is interested enough to fight for you, their protective instincts will overtake their competitive ones. The other Alpha will almost always back off, but of course some people are murderers and one has to be careful." He pauses for breath and a sip of water. "If the Omega is a more dominant personality or more experienced, they will generally either select an Alpha before the fight even tries to start, or unequivocally state that they do not intend to mate with anyone there, and any Alpha who fights will pick up wounds for nothing. Of course they get angry sometimes, but most Alphas have at least some self-control, and good ones have quite a lot."

"What happens when an Alpha and Omega don't tie?" Angel asks.

"An Alpha needs knot stimulation to reach orgasm in most cases, but that stimulation is just as easily supplied by hand or mouth. An Omega who doesn't wish to tie should make that clear, and be prepared to keep touching the knot when it reaches full size outside their bodies. Sometimes people do tie by accident, and in that case it's best to remain calm, since trying to pull off will only hurt you both."

"How do you tell when that's about to happen?" Alex asks.

"During intercourse the knot is usually at half size or so, and can move in and out as easily as the shaft. It stays static for a while, but then starts to swell again. You can feel it happening, and it's gradual enough to make sure it's outside if that's where you want it."

"How long does a tie last, professor?" Hank asks, blushing.

Charles laughs. "I wish I had more definite answers for you! A normal tie ranges from five minutes to half an hour. Five minutes and shorter isn't very good for conception, but longer than half an hour can get boring and sticky. Longer than an hour is technically pathological, though there are drugs for extended tying for fertility reasons and some people use them recreationally. They should of course be used carefully, because of the risk of allergic reactions and priapism."

Hank nods, and raises his hand again immediately. Charles smiles. "Yes?"

"What about atypical dynamic couples?"

"What about them? While most Alphas prefer Omegas and vice versa, and most Betas prefer other Betas, there are always exceptions. Some people are very hard and fast over whether they prefer male or female, where most people have only a slight preference, if they have one at all. Omegas can see each other through heat in a variety of ways, and two Alphas can rut together."

"And Alphas and Omegas with Betas?" Angel asks.

"Well, most female Betas can take a knot, and some Beta males can as well, but it takes much more work and added lubrication. Frottage is a common practice, as well as oral and manual stimulation, which can really serve as answers to so many of life's little problems." Angel cackles, and Hank blushes a deep red. "They can also conceive with either isolation or donated Alpha or Omega gametes."

"Man, what's being pregnant even like?" Alex mutters.

"It varies. I threw up a lot and had to pee all the time. I also had horrible dreams about the babies having something wrong with them and fretted over the nursery being nice enough and clung to Professor Lensherr enough to drive the poor man mad. I think part of the problem was that I didn't feel ready for twins. All in all it's not so bad."

"Did you breastfeed, professor?" Angel again, of course.

"Exclusively, it's much better for the child's health."

"What do they even get a grip on, on a male Omega?" Alex asks.

"In both cases the nipples swell during lactation, so there's more to hang onto. And a flat chest can actually be advantageous. Female breasts can get a bit smothery sometimes."

"Did you give your Alpha a taste?" Angel asks, and Charles's blush answers the question without his permission.

"Angel Salvadore!" He squawks, and then all of them are saved by the bell, his class running out laughing.