Actions

Work Header

The Tragedy of Shakespyren

Summary:

After Shakespeare's death (because he's a human and humans do that sometimes) Fintan processes it in the form of a series of soliloquies.

Notes:

Official Disclaimers
- this is historically inaccurate. I read about two paragraphs of Wikipedia and decided that was enough. In-universe explanation: Fintan is an elf; human history doesn't mean anything.
- I did not figure out the timeline of their relationship. In-universe explanation: Fintan is an elf; time doesn't mean anything.
- I probably messed up the Shakespearean English somewhere. In-universe explanation: this is not Fintan's first language and he's going through a lot. Stop being mean to him.
- I have only read four Shakespeare plays: King Lear, Romeo and Juliet, Othello, and Hamlet. As such, my references are limited.
- The End Notes contain a mix of clarifiers for Shakespearean slang as well as noting the allusions I have made. I have tried my best to contain everything one could need to parse the language. Google is thy friend.

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Chapter 1: Act I

Chapter Text

        The forbidden cities. A labyrinthine 

        mess of buildings and, ‘sblood, so many roads. 

        ‘Tis but a shame that ye humans cannot 

        travel through th’ light, for your consciousnesses

(5)   are more feeble than an herb kept i’ th’ twilight. 

        ‘T makes for such an architectural mess 

        o’ a world. ‘T hath been near a score o’ centuries 

        sith I have walked amongst you, and as much

        has stayed the same as has changed. I was young 

(10) then, not by your human standards, but by 

        mine own, and more foolish than Lear. Th’ last time 

        I loved a human, ‘t ended wi’ crucifixion. 

        I could not tell thou if ‘twas ere o’ after 

        the sinking of Atlantis—’zounds, thou art 

(15) not to know of that—but I do know that 

        I resolvèd to ne’er return to these

        forsaken places. Still, my place made o’ me

        a liar to myself. I would thou hadst 

        not t’ invent black powder t’ eviscerate 

(20) thine enemies, but ‘twas not so. Thou thirst 

        for th’ blood o’ another is more severe than th’ bite

        o’ a crocodile. O, Egypt, thou wast 

        a lovely civilization, with thine 

        pyramids of thine own construction. Ay, 

(25) ‘twas no telekinesis, but human 

        determination constructing those stone 

        monuments. I ne’er understood wherefore 

        they did that, but ‘twas their own time they took. 

        My past seeing thine civilizations 

(30) made me a worthy candidate t’ check

        i’ on what thou wert doing i’ thine own spare time 

        sith we left thee alone. I was none too 

        jovial of mine assignment. Being 

        the cockalorum that I am, I felt 

(35) this beneath my place, but ‘tis not the way

        o’ Rome. ‘Twas not till I found fair William 

        I quitted cantankerous character. 

        But soft, ‘tis not the way of thy world o’ mine. 

        Nay, thou canst not be a man who loveth 

(40) another, and my station preventeth 

        me from the consideration. Still, ere 

        I knew of what happened, I found myself 

        longing with the desire for more. Thou 

        already knowest how this shall end ere

(45) it began, as did I, which did not stop 

        me for but a moment. I travelled through 

        hundreds of towns, and still I kept wand’ring 

        back right here to live William’s latest. 

        To be or not to be here, ‘twas th’ question, 

(50) if thou shalt forgive the allusion plain, 

        and the answer was for certes, ay. ‘Twas

        not until after a performance o’ that

        very work that I met the playwright, a 

        man more eloquent than any I had 

(55) e’er met or e’er will. An Everblaze of

        emotion ignited in my soul on 

        that day. He could maketh the confusing 

        mess of English rules to poetry 

        Like ‘t was nothing, and he knew much o’ nothing. 

(60) Nay, thou canst not make much ado about

        nothing without being Jovian. I 

        am nothing if not a strumpet, and he 

        O, he was perfection to a degree 

        I hitherto thought unattainable. 

(65) ‘Twould not be long ere I would be wrong, 

        and still it was exactly my swan song.