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It was odd to be back, Yasha thought to herself as she and Beau continued from their… what should she call it? Confrontation? With her old tribe. No, that didn’t feel right to her, not considering that most confrontations for the Dolorav ended up in a physical fight.
Though it had been close and she was pretty sure that the only reason they had gotten away was thanks to the Storm Lord’s intervention.
She would have to pray properly tonight in thanks. She and Beau may have been able to fight the tribe, but it wasn’t a theory that she was eager to test. Especially not with Beau here. She knew perfectly well that Beau could take care of herself, but she did not want to risk anything.
The monk was silent as Yasha led them towards where the… Skyspear had said that Zuala had been buried, her words still echoing in Yasha’s head.
They made camp but decided against lighting a fire. Yasha was not going to take the chance that a few of the Dolorav warriors might decide that hunting them down was worth breaking the Skyspear’s orders and while she was confident that she and Beau could hold their own against a few warriors easily, Yasha didn’t want to fight more people who she used to claim as her tribe.
Yasha couldn’t remember anything after Zuala died in detail, all she recalled was a lot of fighting and shouting.
According to the new Skyspear, Yasha had gone on a rampage and killed indiscriminately, and the worst part was that Yasha believed it.
“Babe?” Beau’s soft voice gently breaks her out of her thoughts. “I think that stick is done.”
Yasha looked down at her hands. What probably used to be a stick had been snapped over and over and was now nothing at all, the small pieces scattered all over her lap.
“Sorry.” What was she apologizing for? It was a stick and she knew Beau didn’t care about that.
“You don’t have to apologize for anything, I just wanted to ask how you were doing? That was very…intense.”
“Yeah, yeah. It…I’m fine, we got what we needed.” She doesn’t meet Beau’s gaze, despite the fact that she can feel it on her, burning at the feeling of being perceived.
“I’m here for you, babe, for whatever you need to talk about. You are so brave for confronting your past and I am so proud of you. And even though I don’t know Zuala, I’m sure she would be proud of you too.”
It was too much for Yasha. She had been so flayed emotionally since they entered Dolorav territory and the closer they got to the grave the worse it got for her.
Because the grave would be final, the final proof that Zuala was really gone, that she hadn’t gotten away by some miraculous means.
She knows Beau wants to hear her worries, that her girlfriend would listen to her as she poured her heart out.
But she couldn’t handle that right then, not so close to her old tribe. Perhaps once they were back in Zadash, back to their new life.
So she doesn’t say any of it. Instead, she looks at Beau and only utters two words. “Hold me?”
Beau immediately had her arms around her, gently playing with her hair as she whispered comforts into Yasha’s ear.