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Fighting a battle is always easier than dealing with its consequences or even its aftermath. Just because he won against Verlaine and Guivre does not mean that it came easy for him, he lost a lot more than he gained, his subordinates who acted as his shield had perished, Murase, the detective who tried to show him light was killed by Paul Verlaine and last but not the least - his flags, the ones whom he could call his people, who he had opened up to after the betrayal of the sheep, the ones who he believed would never betray him and always stay by his side, the ones who proved their loyalty to him by going against the boss’s orders to help him figure out his identity, had also died due to that loyalty.
That's quite a few people who had to pay their price for trusting him or wanting to guide him and he now carried the burden of their death and unlived future with him. He knew all of them very well, enough to know that none of them will ever blame him for all this but knowing this didn't mean that the guilt building up inside of him would ease up.
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It took him two whole weeks to recover from the incident though his mind was still fuzzy from it. He didn't know that releasing the singularity within himself would take such a toll on his body. He couldn't get out of his bed for three whole days and even the smell of certain food items made him vomit, he'd cough out blood regularly and had high fever for a whole week. Mori was oddly generous and gave him a three month vacation to recover from that incident both physically and mentally, and he was not going to let that vacation go to waste.
The dorms of his flags were still not cleaned out; they remained the only ones untouched on Chuuya's orders for he wanted to do the job himself. Kouyou had told him that it was already hard enough for him and he needn't try too hard, she could arrange a professional cleaning squad for the flags who would handle all the belongings with proper care and respect but Chuuya had refused her.
He wanted to do it himself or rather he needed to do it himself. He felt like it's the least he could do for them now, after all he was indirectly the cause of their death. He could surely be responsible enough to handle the aftermath because only he can make sure that their belongings are properly taken care of and their valuables find a proper place to rest now that their owners are not there anymore.
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Chuuya always hated how noisy the Port Mafia dorms were. His top floor neighbor, Albatross would always run the vacuum at weird timings, get in his house randomly, invade his personal space and drag him along to some of his solo missions or take him to his or Pianoman's house for a movie night. It was fun, sure but he always wished he could get some peace and quiet in his house but now that he had it, he hated it.
It was too quiet for his liking, he hated how he didn't appreciate the flags more, tell them they loved them as much as they loved him, at this point he even regrets never getting a chance to properly thank them for all that they did for him. But he could sink in his regrets and sadness later for he had a job to do now.
He began cleaning up the dorms of his beloved flags. Starting from his favorite noisy upstairs neighbor whose voice he'll never get to hear again and would miss for years to come.
Now here's the thing about Chuuya, he never plans and even if he does it's not a well structured see 20 steps ahead and have 15 backups just in case kinda plan, that was never his thing, he liked going with the flow and now the flow was cleaning out Albatross’s dorm, he just wasn't sure how.
He started out with the kitchen, the least used part of that dorm because Albatross couldn't cook and didn't bother learning.
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It was a late summer night, Albatross had just finished one of his solo missions, and called Chuuya telling him that he missed him and was craving some home-made meal (whatever that means) demanding that he make him a nice dinner for that is the least he could do after not keeping him company for an entire week, he refused and hung up the call but in typical Chuuya fashion, got up and made something for him anyways.
Albatross came home to omurice with a side of stir fried vegetables and complained about his workload while eating dinner, that's when Chuuya offered to teach him cooking-
“why on earth do I have to bother cooking when I can just get into any of your houses and have a nice homely meal with some nice company, sounds kinda useless to me”
“Yea but what if you can't reach us for some reason or you're in hiding due to some mission and need some food”
“Bro…do you realllly think that I can't cook basic shit…I can actually boil water and stuff….also our ancestors survived on fucking fruits…I don't wanna learn useless shit that you'll end up doing for me anyway”
Chuuya wanted to protest but dropped the topic on seeing a yawning Albatross complaining about having to catch up on this variety show, they ended up falling asleep while watching said show after dinner.
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Now that the man was gone, Chuuya wished he'd at least forcefully come to his dorm along with Pianoman and taught him a thing or two, maybe even made bread together and they could watch some movies during the dough resting time, but that was just a thought now and he'd never be able to achieve that.
He'd later go on and use that sentiment to teach the Akutagawa siblings the art of cooking fancy dinners that was passed onto him by Kouyou and Pianoman 2 years later because his useless brother didn't teach Gin anything other than assassination and disguise and his waste of bandages of a partner only taught Ryuunosuke how to boil food and make the most tasteless concoction the world has seen, in short neither of them had any survival skills to live alone, and Chuuya as much as he'd like to deny liked taking care of his people. But the present Chuuya had some cleaning to do.
He cleaned the kitchen without much trouble but the real problem was cleaning up his living room, it's the place he'd called tasteless and weird time and again, I mean name another person who'd have a fucking banana peel shaped lamp as a side table decoration and his sofa looked like a goddamn popcorn bowl, he'd never understand where he even got those furnitures from but it's also the place where he spent half of his days after joining the mafia.
Tross would always drag him back in here and make him watch movies, anime, series and anything that was popular, this was also the place where they watched all of Lippmann's works, they'd watched it together with him and they'd also called him countless times when he was overseas to complain about his acting or how he should have got more screen time in that movie or how the leading lady was too annoying for their taste.
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Chuuya really wanted to soldier through this like how he'd done during the funeral of the flags and Murase, how he'd himself bought all the necessary items a week earlier and sent them away properly without breaking down even once before he was done with the funeral, he did feel numb afterwards and sat in front of the flags the entire day just trying to get on board with the fact that he'll never be seeing them now, not anymore.
That's not so say he didn't cry, his emotions took over him when he saw his shitty partner almost burning down his house while trying to supposedly cook something in his house, he'd never know what he was actually trying to do but his presence was comforting enough for him to cry for hours in his arms, they never talked about it afterwards. It was one of their many moments in darkness that both knew would never be brought up again.
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Chuuya had just finished taking off all the wall decorations and the projector, now the only thing left to do was sort out the precious movies, albums, gruesome fairy tales (completely opposite to the Disney movies that Dazai forced him to watch every week) and games collection. All he had to do was pick them up carefully and put them inside the cardboard boxes yet he broke down into sobs the moment he touched one of Lippmann's movies.
It might just have been the hardest part of the job with him breaking into sobs and whimpers every two minutes as he eyed the next item in the collection. The item, the memories attached to it, Albatross's voice ringing through his head as he explained what it was and when and how he brought it, it was all too much for him to keep his calm but that was not the highlight of the day, it was the red jewelry box and the notebook that was lying on his bed might just have been the worse parting gift he's ever got.
Needless to say, it took him the entire afternoon to put back all of Albatross's collections into the boxes, and took him a moment more to regain his composure and put them outside the house and call one of his men to come and take them back to his new apartment, he did not have the heart to dispose them or give them away, he might also never gain the courage to use them himself but just knowing that they'll be safe in his house gave him enough peace for now.
He would finally gain the courage to actually use that collection years later after an infamous American organization would attack the city and Yumeno would transfer to his department as a result. He'd use that collection of horror movies and games to reward Yumeno for their good behavior and not just manipulating his subordinates to kill themselves. That'll also give him the courage to take out the albums from time to time to listen to them.
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Finally done with the living room, he approached the bedroom. He's only ever been there once, he always preferred hanging out in his living room and no one would blame him for that, not when his bed looked like a goddamn noodle bowl, his taste in interior design was really out of this world.
He assumed it'll take him about the same time as it did with the kitchen, there wasn't really anything important in there after all, but give it to the flags to never fail to surprise him because what on earth was he supposed to do when he casually flipped through the notebook in the bed only to find out that they were planning another anniversary party for him. Not just that but his gift happened to be right there in the bed.
It took him about fifteen minutes of just sitting there on the floor, trying to come to terms with the information he just learnt and gathering every part of himself back together after which he finally gained the courage to crawl up to the bed and open the box.
And oh now that he opened it, he couldn't conceal the bark that left his mouth and now he was laughing like a maniac while tears rolled down his cheeks. Inside the box were two gold chains, identical to the ones the blonde would often wear, the ones that Chuuya hated with burning passion. Now that he examined it closely, his initials were also carved in there, totally an Albatross like gift.
One of the chains would soon find a permanent place in his hat solely because it was too dear to him to not use it and he wasn't actually going to put that thing on his neck.
The rest of the cleaning was a breeze and he was done with the bedroom, bathroom and closet within the next three hours. He took most of the accessories with him along with certain jackets and t shirts and clothing items that the teen either liked too much and wore regularly or spent too much money on and liked showing off and put the rest in cardboard boxes taking a mental note to donate all of them to that one orphanage Doc would drag him along to volunteer in.
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It was Lippmann's turn next, if Albatross's place was the hardest to clean, Lippmann's was the trickiest. In papers Lippmann had a giant mansion facing the shores of Yokohama and while that was true, it wasn't actually the place where he stayed. He and Pianoman actually lived together in an apartment near the Port Mafia dorms and the mansion was mostly used as a hangout spot for the flags and storage purposes for all the gifts his fans sent him.
Lippmann never used any of those gifts but he also hated the idea of throwing away something that others spent their hard earned money to buy him and so they all ended up staying in that mansion. Chuuya knew that none of the gifts actually had any sentimental value to him and he never really spent much time there. Needless to say, cleaning up the mansion was the easiest part of the day. He just had to sort out all the gifts and donate them to the nearest orphanages, it didn't really take much time courtesy to “upon the tainted sorrow”.
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Now came the hardest part of the day, Cleaning up Pianoman and Lippmann's apartment. They have been living here together for the last four years and were also planning on adopting a dog later, a wish that they'll never be able to fulfill.
If there was one word to describe their house, it would be either warm or comfort. Everything about this place was just right from the warm lighting in the living room to the slightly vintage style kitchen to the countless Polaroids adorning the walls of the living room, each with a story and a precious memory behind it.
There was a red binder placed in the kitchen counter, which had witnessed most of Chuuya and Pianoman’s bonding moments.
Pianoman, being the designated chef of the flags, was happy to find out that someone was actually interested in helping him in the kitchen and took it as his cue to teach Chuuya every dish he could make. Soon, his recipe book became their recipe book, the binder filled with countless scribbles of both their handwritings, attached pictures of the final product, pictures of them cooking together that Lippmann clicked.
Talking about Lippmann, the man liked taking pictures as much as he liked being photographed, that's what got him into acting and later even directing apparently, too bad the world only ever got to see one movie directed by Lippmann and the man himself never will never get to witness his work being adorned with awards left and right.
The pictures that graced the living room walls were an organized mess. They did look like they belonged there but Chuuya never fully understood just why he needed or even had so many pictures of mundane daily moments among the more livelier pictures. He didn't understand the point of having pictures of random pavements, road signs and railways among the pictures of a happy Pianoman, or why there were two whole columns dedicated to just sunrise and sunsets with the dates they were clicked, they all looked mostly same and we're taken from the living room balcony but why exactly did he even need them.
The pictures were always a fascination to Chuuya and he had asked him time and again about their purpose, the answers varied from
“Eh aren't they just pretty to look at”
“It's not just the picture itself Chuuya, it's the countless unspoken memories attached to it- when it was clicked, how it was clicked, the people with me there, my feelings at that moment, the subject of the picture. All of that and much more is encased safely in there for me to admire. A story that only I know the whole of and others can only try and predict the incident, from what little clue I leave behind for them”
“It's a nice momento, you know, something to look back at years later and smile at, regardless of what is happening then in my life because no matter what I'm going through then, the past me had happier or even sadder times, and you have to trust me on this but it's really comforting at times”
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As expected, taking off the pictures from the wall was the hardest part. He knew it would be mentally exhausting for him and avoided looking at them as much as he could. There were pictures of him and Pianoman messing up a recipe, him and albatross sleeping together - he was half sure that it was clicked by doc, iceman defeating him, the first time he defeated Iceman in combat…and oh, so this is what he meant by that
“Our memories can lie but evidence won't, a picture is an unbiased witness of memories, be it horrible or intimate. It gives you a chance to look back at the past, and when you do, uhm..it might be different from what you remember. You'll know it when you see it Chuuya~”
And he did see it now, he saw the slight smile on Iceman's face and he saw how happy he looked at the moment that Chuuya defeated him. He never remembered that moment like this for Iceman had lectured him about being reckless and unruly moments after the picture was clicked and all of a sudden all the memories of that day came flooding back to him. It was fascinating how just one picture could evoke so many emotions from the present Chuuya.
After the pictures came the scripts of Lippmann's movies. There were countless annotations and improvisations in each of them, he'd always liked practicing with Albatross and Chuuya while Pianoman commented on his acting and facial expressions. Soon after Chuuya joined the flags, Albatross pulled out of helping duty because apparently Chuuya was a better actor than him and watching them recite the script was fun.
He did expect a loose picture or two to fall out of the scripts, what he didn't expect was for it to be a picture of Lippmann and Pianoman in white suits, standing in the wedding altar with Lippmann holding a boutique of blue roses.
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The nature of Lippmann's and Pianoman's relationship has always been ambiguous, they never really liked confirming anything about their relationship and would swear that they were not together but their actions said otherwise. The lingering touches, the honey dripping from Lippmann's eyes whenever Pianoman would smile at him, them disappearing behind the curtains only for their shadows to become one, minutes later, them knowing the other's habits and schedules. to the flags and Chuuya, it was obvious.
But even then, Chuuya never entertained the possibility of them being married, The flags would have known so and told him and they themselves had no reason to hide that. Either way Chuuya will never get to know if they were actually hiding it or waiting for a good opportunity to relay the information to them, for now they were not here anymore and Chuuya's attention was now caught by the blue box below the coffee table.
The gift in Albatross's house and Chuuya's picture in the box were enough hints for him to figure out that it was for him. He took a deep breath to prepare himself for what was about to come and slowly opened the box only to find a blue digital camera staring back at him.
This camera would soon enough become one of his favorite items to carry around and even if he'll never know the stories behind the pictures of the countless inanimate objects that Lippmann clicked, he'll soon have his own collection of those…the pictures of his then ex partner and dead friends that he'll look back at fondly four years from now, the pictures that'll never fail to bark a laugh out of him, pictures of roads that Dazai had crossed while leaving the Mafia, pictures of his shelter houses he stayed at that Chuuya never entered, pictures of the sunsets they witnessed together, pictures of the dinner he'd had with his dead comrades, pictures of those who he failed to protect. All of them locked away in SD cards for him to look through whenever his heart desired, the stories only he knew the whole of and others could only guess. He'll then understand what the actor had meant by “some pictures speak more than words ever can”
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He ended up taking Pianoman's beloved utensils and recipe books and Lippmann's scripts and awards along with all his pictures and posters.
The next of the Flags houses might just be the easiest to clean. The man himself didn't live there most days after all. He liked to live recklessly and would spend most of his days in the old world, Lippmann's mansion or the training area of the port mafia. He preferred living a minimalist life and his only valuables were his coffee bar and collection of coffee beans along with his overly fancy record player and the collection of vinyls to accompany it.
Aside from that he also had an expensive massage chair at the corner of a living room with a side table beside it. Chuuya had only entered this place once before to call Iceman for a joint mission they had and he remembered seeing the man sleeping in the chair then. This would be the first time Chuuya would use the camera, he didn't even know what came over him but he knew he wanted to have a picture of that empty chair in his camera roll.
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He didn't really expect to find much over here. He'd just taken the coffee gadgets and the coffee beans, along with the music collection and cleaned up the rest of his apartment. It should have been fairly easy but he'd gotten severely backtracked by the covered knife lying on the coffee table. He'd already gotten Iceman's knife before the funeral—it was the only knife he owned other than the kitchen knives. The present Chuuya, who had just cleaned the kitchen, was sure that nothing was missing from there, so he went ahead and took off the scabbard to find a knife identical to the one Iceman used.
With Chuuya's initials on its blade.
That was the end of Chuuya's cleaning day because no one, least of all himself, would blame him for crying the entire day and falling asleep on the sofa he was sitting on, once he had exhausted all of his emotions.
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It had been three weeks since Chuuya had joined the mafia. He knew that most mafiosos didn't welcome him here yet due to him being the former king of the Sheep. He tried not to let it bother him that much, he tried telling himself that Kouyou caring for him was more than enough but one could only try so much and he'd not deny that he was actually happy when Pianoman had asked him to join the Flags. What he didn't expect however was that he was to receive combat training from Iceman.
Chuuya and Iceman had fought in the past when he was still in the Sheep and had won, there was no way he was going to get trained by someone weaker than him. However, their first spar really humbled him, with the rule of no ability usage, Chuuya didn’t even last for five minutes against Iceman. It had really annoyed him in the beginning and he began to dread the next weekly spar but Nakahara Chuuya always faces challenges head on, it was not his nature to run away. Once he got on board with the fact that Iceman in fact was stronger than him physically, he did his best to train and even take advice from him to successfully beat him one day.
It has been at the end of one such spars that dragged on to an hour and half that Iceman had asked him if he would like any gift for finally defeating him, Chuuya had dismissed him immediately due to the ridiculous nature of the question. It makes perfect sense for him to be the strongest, why would he need a gift for that.
After their next spar that Iceman had won just by a landslide, he told Chuuya that he’d look good with a knife and would be gifted a knife similar to the one he himself carries, since he didn’t want anything particular.
Chuuya still thought it to be a terrible idea but he’d be lying if he said he was not looking forward to beating Iceman. He fully expected Iceman to pull out said knife from his coat pocket and give it to him after he had successfully beat the man. He was a little disappointed when all he got was a lecture on recklessness after his win but then again beating Iceman in a spar itself was quite an accomplishment and he'd do it again to prove himself.
Turns out the reason he didn’t get it then was either because the engraving took longer than expected or he was going to give it later along with the other gifts for the one year anniversary. He’d never know what caused the delay but what he did know was that he wanted to keep that knife on himself, just the way Iceman did and so it would always stay in his coat pocket. He’ll never actually use the object but will keep it in good condition and carry it with him even when off duty.
As for Iceman’s very own knife, it’ll find a place below Chuuya’s pillow for years to come.
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Finally, it was time to clean the dorm below his. Doc was rarely home and spent most of his time in the hospital, sleeping on one of the empty beds when tired. The hospital food was edible enough for him and if he craved something fancy, he had enough money to go to the nearest restaurants. This was also the place that Chuuya had never entered before so he had no idea about what he was to encounter.
Chuuya has always felt a certain unease with doctors and it was only recently that he learned that it might have to do with his past in the research facility. Doc was not like other doctors though, he and Chuuya didn't meet often yet he still tried his best to make the redhead feel comfortable around him.
He'd also force Chuuya and Albatross to come along with him and give free medical checkups in the orphanages. Doc didn't really come off as the kind of person who'd enjoy volunteering work so Chuuya had asked him why he did it, his response was as peculiar as him
“Every life I save brings me one step closer to God. My aim is to save two million people, the same number of people that God had killed in the Bible. Being a doctor in the underworld, you see a lot of interesting cases for sure but I doubt the underworld is enough to achieve my goal”
To Chuuya, the explanation sounded like a load of bullshit but he knew better than to say that to Doc’s face. It had taken Chuuya four months to open up to Doc, the longest among the Flags but once he did, he couldn't trust another doctor. He'd always go back to Doc for any of his medical needs and now that the man was gone he wondered if he'd be able to trust another doctor with his health.
The answer to that is an obvious no. Chuuya in his entire lifetime will never be able to trust another doctor like he trusted Doc and he'd go on to hate hospitals in general for as long as he will live.
Doc’s house was plain and simple, it looked similar to what Chuuya's dorm had looked the day he first settled in there. Nothing much of value was in there so it was a breeze to clean it up. His office however, was an entirely different story. He kept most of his valued possessions here and this was also the place where Chuuya had got most of his wounds stitched.
Chuuya hated the smell of sanitizers and cleaning products. He never voiced that opinion of his and sucked it up whenever he had to face it but apparently his expressions gave away too much and Doc was able to figure that out within 10 minutes of an injured Chuuya entering his office. He called him a wimp for not being able to deal with the smell of bleach and getting poisoned while also airing out the office. When Chuuya resisted treatment that day, Doc had threatened to sedate him; they both ended up bickering while the redhead was getting stitched. Two months later though, the hospital scent was gone from his office.
He'd only go on to find out later today that the reason for that was Doc switching up the usual cleaning products with customized ones and go on to learn from Kajii years later that the both of them had come up with the formula for the cleaning products. Kajii is never interested in experiments that don't result in an explosion but helped out regardless because getting on his bad books was a one way ticket to hell.
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Cleaning the office was harder than it looked because of the sheer amount of junk and medical equipment in here. Much like the rest of the Flags’ Chuuya was aware that Doc valued his tea ceremony set and his collection of tea from around the world but what he didn't anticipate was that among them would be a nicely wrapped box of tea blends made especially for Chuuya to help him with his nightmares, he'd also go on to find the exact recipe for those in Doc’s notebook.
The flags caring for Chuuya unconditionally in ways that even he couldn't comprehend will never fail to shock him. If Chuuya would have found out any of this earlier, he would have questioned their intentions because to him love and affection always came with a price- the research faculty liked him because he was a successful experiment, the sheep loved him because he was strong enough to protect them, the mafia valued him because he was the former king of the sheep and could manipulate Gravity.
The flags however only ever saw him as Nakahara Chuuya and loved him for who he was regardless of what value he brought to them and Chuuya wasn't sure if he deserved that. He wasn't sure why they needed to die to prove their loyalty and hated himself for not trusting them sooner, for not saving them, for not being able to tell them that he loved them.
The flags might not be in the world right now but they'll always be with Nakahara Chuuya. Albatross will be with him when he will swear to be loyal to the mafia, Iceman will be with him when he will challenge Verlaine to spars and finally defeat him three years later, Doc’s spirit will guide him and ease his mind anytime he is too afraid to seek medical attention. Albatross, Lippmann and Doc will be with him on the lonely nights when he needs some company. Pianoman would influence his thought process and be there with him when he'll become an executive. Lippmann will be there with him when he has to negotiate with other criminals overseas. The spirit of the flags will continue to live on till Nakahara Chuuya will take his last breath.