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“The glyphs… I can’t cast them anymore,”
Luz muttered, still tracing symbols into the dirt as if it would make any lick of difference when every single one of her attempts thus far had failed.
The very first glyph she had tried upon waking up like this had been a fire spell.
—
It was extremely disorienting, feeling her entire body crumble into nothingness, only to open her eyes again after what felt like just a mere moment yet also an eternity later. She could see her surroundings—the forest floor, tall trees, thorny bushes— but something was preventing her from being able to truly comprehend them.
Remembering how exactly she ended up in this position was also proving difficult. It was almost like trying to recall the details from a dream you just woke up from— the most intense emotions and imagery from it still fresh in your mind, but any further specifics you try to latch onto already gone.
She knew she had been with Eda, with King, and with the Collector— she doesn’t think any of her other friends or her mother had been with them, although she isn’t sure why anymore. They had all been chasing after Be… that man.
It shook her—it pained her to her core to even think of Him . She knows He had hurt her, and hurt her very badly at that.
Blue eyes aglow with centuries of hatred and disgust. Towering over her. A piercing beam of bright light heading right for— them, exploding and crackling against her. Her hand stung with the memory of what must’ve come next. Her mind wasted no time to supply her with flashes and images of rot trailing down her fingers and quickly overtaking her entire arm, her entire body— disintegrating it into light.
It was so bright…
She remembered the Collector’s terrified face watching her. That was right… it was the Collector she had been trying to protect, she recalled. She thinks she knew how risky of a move that had been— or maybe she hadn’t been thinking at all. That sounded more like her.
There was something else… she had desperately wanted to tell Eda and King something. She wishes she could remember what it was.
Where were they, anyway…? Were they okay? Where was she? She doesn’t think the place she had gotten hurt in had this many trees, so she must’ve moved elsewhere…
It wasn’t dark out anymore either. Everything was unusually bright around her, actually.
It was like… the glow was coming from her own body. She imagined that would’ve felt extremely hot, yet she was absolutely freezing cold for a reason that both eluded her yet dreaded her to her very core at the same time.
She didn’t really have the energy to properly think just yet, let alone move— but she was so cold and felt that if she didn’t try to do something about it now, she wouldn’t be around to for much longer. It was so quiet and lonely, and Luz absently wondered if it must feel something like this to be a hiker freezing to death atop a desolate snowy mountain. She’d heard stories about it before. A silent and painful way to cut your life awfully short.
Something in her told her it was completely implausible that she had even survived what He had done to her, though… she didn’t know. She didn’t feel like she had the capacity to think about it any deeper. She was here after all, wasn’t she? This wasn’t a dream.
Maybe all she had to do for now was sit up, get warm, then find help… Eda and King? Maybe she could ask her palisman—Stringbean—to let them know where she was… and then they could all look for her mom and their friends together.
She just didn’t want to have to face Him anymore. It stung her as deeply selfish, but she couldn’t even bear the thought of merely looking into His eyes again.
If not her, though, then who…?
A part of her was chiding herself for not taking responsibility for her mistakes. Again. For having these feelings of just wanting to run away from her problems; to escape. To go home. And the other part of her… it was just tired. Really, truly, tired. And cold….
She struggled to sit up, most of her weight being supported by one trembling arm locked beneath her. Using her other hand, she shakily began to trace a fire glyph in the dirt she had just been laying on.
There was something very wrong with her body… but she couldn’t focus on that right now. She had to get warm first. She had to cast this glyph, get a small fire going, and hopefully cure this trembling in her hands.
…
Nothing was happening.
Did she draw the glyph wrong? She doesn’t recall messing one of those up for a long, long time…
She etched another symbol into the ground, quickly tapping her fingers against it yet only being met with silence once more.
If she hadn’t already been on edge before, she certainly was now. She never drew the glyphs wrong, ever. She couldn’t fathom why they wouldn’t be working for her anymore.
What if… What if the Titan had decided that had been enough? The island had taught her this magic after all, what if it could cut her off from it too? Although, something about that didn’t sound accurate… that man could always use the glyphs…
…
She couldn’t cast plants, ice, and not even light. She had no magic again.
Wait—
“Stringbean—?”
Her own voice sounded choked up and airy to her, a little bit like if she were speaking within a tunnel. One half of her face felt all numb and tingly as well. It reminded her of the uncomfortable sensation of a hand or foot falling asleep when being held in bad posture for too long… she doesn’t think she’d ever felt something like that in her face before.
Letting out a sharp breath, she looked up from the dirt to survey the forest around her once more— but there was no sign of her little palisman… she didn’t think the heavy void in her stomach could’ve possibly grown any larger, but the absence of her familiar seemed to do the trick.
The word ‘hollow’ came to mind; she felt hollow.
How was she going to find warmth now…? How would her friends and family know to come find her…?
It took a long while before she could pull herself up to her feet. She didn’t like the way she walked—unsteady and slow— or the way she could see the ends of her costume almost floating in the air around her as if they were weightless.
She thinks she knows what must be wrong, but there was no way she could just admit it to herself— not even within the privacy of her own mind.
She carried on, a limp in her step. Tears were painting streaks down her face. It was so cold…
—
Despondent, Luz looked up from her useless scribbling.
… It was difficult to look at him in his state.
She figured he felt the same about her.
She had run into Hunter—or more accurately, he had run into her—no more than a few hours ago, she thinks.
For a second she had been absolutely shocked to see him standing there, eyeing her in bewilderment— and then it all just clicked. The only reason she was seeing Hunter standing before her like that was because, just like him, she had died.
He looked miserable and washed out. His skin had paled to this sickly bluish colour, the same colour of the glow emanating off of him. Entire body still dripping wet as if he had just been pulled out of the graveyard water a minute ago. His eyes… blank, and perpetually leaking with tears.
They had both just stared at each other in startled silence for a long while, and then fell into each other’s arms and cried.
They didn’t even really have to confirm anything, but Hunter did end up asking her what had happened. She didn’t even know what to possibly tell him just yet, so she had just shaken her head.
Now they sat here, Hunter quietly cradling a little light spell in his hands while Luz tried and tried to make the glyphs work so she could cast her own. She didn’t understand how Hunter had done it.
He finally looked up at her, belatedly shaken out of his own deep thoughts at the sound of her voice. He must’ve missed what she had told him, though, since all he replied with was a small, “Mm?”
“The glyphs… I can’t cast them anymore,” Luz repeated, words no louder than a mumble.
Hunter seemed to ponder over that for a moment, his head dipping downward to study her drawings on the ground.
“Maybe… maybe they don’t work for us,” he muttered, “while we’re… like this.”
“But then, how did you—…?”
He just stared at her uncomprehendingly, so she gestured over to the ball of light he so gently had hovering just above his open palms.
When his expression of confusion didn’t change, she spoke, “Your light spell. How did you make it?”
“My… light spell?”
“The one in your… hands…” Her sentence trailed off, as she got the sense that there was something here she was completely missing. Hunter seemed to be growing alarmed, which instantly filled her with an uneasy feeling in turn.
“I don’t have a…” He paused, giving her a weird look.
“Are you talking about Flapjack?”
“Flapjack?” Luz echoed, perplexed.
She didn’t get it. That didn’t even remotely look like a bird in his hands right now, so what on earth could he be talking about?
Even worse, Hunter now seemed upset with her. His shoulders slumped and expression dropped, and she noticed her own shoulders tensing up in this sense of shared distress.
Curiously, the little light in his hands began to move towards her, as if it had a mind of its own. It met her cheek with a characteristic snuggling that reminded her of one creature only—
“Wait… Flapjack? Really?” She asked softly, hand subconsciously raising to try and pet the little light (bird?) in return. Her recognition was rewarded by Flapjack snuggling into her cold skin just a bit more, with a bit more enthusiasm too. She could hardly believe it, but… it was right there.
It didn’t really feel like his usual, warm-feathered embrace though. He felt different.
“You’re cold too,” Luz found herself whispering, and the light against her cheek seemed to shiver in confirmation.
Hunter was still looking at her warily.
“Can’t you see him?” He asked, his voice sounding a bit muffled and withdrawn.
“I’m sorry, not really… he looks just like a light glyph—“
“No, he doesn’t.”
He had replied with enough finality to his tone that Luz decided to drop any potential debate. She didn’t have the energy, either.
Flapjack hovered down from her cheek to look up at her from her lap— she assumed, at least. She wondered what the little cardinal must be thinking.
“Don’t worry, I believe you,” Luz said, continuing to stroke what she hoped Flapjack would feel as his head. It felt a little bit like a peace offering, since it was clear that she wasn’t able to see Hunter’s palisman the way he was able to. She just didn’t really understand why.
Her friend seemed to be easing up at least, and he quietly spent the next few minutes just watching her pet Flapjack. There was a softness to his expression that hadn’t been there before.
“You wouldn’t happen to know where Stringbean is, would you?” Luz cooed humourlessly, eyes still on the little bird made of light. She figured he had heard her, but unsurprisingly could not offer up a response.
“Stringbean?” Hunter questioned instead, confusion evident on his face once more.
“She’s my palisman,” She sighed.
Her friend looked surprised.
“She… she hatched, finally?”
Oh, that was right… he hadn’t been there. She wishes he could’ve seen her with alongside the rest of their friends.
“I think it was yesterday, yeah… to be honest, it happened when I was least expecting it. Funny how things work, huh?”
She turned away, expression crumbling as that horrible shake reappeared in her hands.
“Funny how things work…” She repeated brokenly.
Hunter frowned a bit, and it looked like he was really trying to figure out what he should say next.
“What does she look like?”
“Oh,” Luz chuckled, still without any humour to it. “She’s adorable… she’s a little purple snake with this stripe down her back and the cutest little ears. The cutest little eyes. Did you know— did you know she can shapeshift? I didn’t even know that was something palismen could do…”
“Really? Into other animals?” He asked, eyes a bit wider with interest.
“Yeah— she showed me a few. Like a bat, or a tiny dragon… she’s really special.” Luz took a shaky breath before continuing, “It all just feels so stupid now… that I lost her and I don’t know where she is.”
They fell silent again for a moment.
“Luz…” Hunter began, sounding nervous, “What happened?”
She bit her lip. She had no idea how to talk about this without breaking down into sobs again.
“Ne—nevermind, I’m sorry,” He tried amending hurriedly.
“No, it’s… okay. Okay. Um…” She knew she had started wringing her hands anxiously now, even if she wouldn’t look down at herself to confirm it. Her eyes remained fixed on the dark trees in the distance; it was easier that way.
Hunter remained quiet, and she figured he was giving her the time she needed to collect herself.
“I found Eda and King, you know…? It took a little while, since they were stuck in the Collector’s castle… but they were both okay. We were so relieved,” She sniffled.
“The Collector’s a nice kid too, actually… I think he just doesn’t really understand, um… I don’t know. Mortal things…”
It felt a bit odd to be talking about ‘mortal things’ right now. Clearly she didn’t understand everything about that topic either.
“I think we were somewhere on the knee, I don’t really remember, and then we saw the Titan’s eye start glowing blue— that blue—“ she heard Hunter gasp, but pressed on, ”—and we knew that somehow, He had taken it over.”
“I wanted to protect the Collector. He was going to kill them.”
Her story—her memories—felt so disjointed and poorly retold. She didn’t know how else to go about this, though.
“But He… got you instead?” Hunter finished for her, his voice no louder than a frightened whisper.
Luz nodded.
When her friend didn’t answer for a long time, she forced herself to look back in his direction. She almost wished she had just kept her eyes focused on the forest instead.
He looked devastated, lips twisted in pain and one hand wound tightly around the fabric of his shirt over his chest.
“I told Him I never wanted Him to hurt anyone ever again… that’s why I… in the graveyard—…”
“It didn’t work,” He finished, his own thoughts evidently not in order either, “It didn’t work.”
Luz thought she might’ve understood what he meant. She remembered his final words in the graveyard, and how, well— final — they felt. Like he knew what he was about to do and that he wouldn’t make it out alive.
It was so brave, and it was so fucking stupid.
But then again, what right did she have to criticize him when she had basically done the same thing? They were both just as awful as each other.
“I’m sorry, Hunter…” She murmured, not sure what other words she could possibly conjure up to make this situation better for them.
“I’m sorry,” He echoed back to her softly.
They sat like that, the silence washing over the two of them anew.
—
The Owl House looked a bit different to how she remembered it. She thinks, at least. All the graffiti sprayed onto the building’s exterior seemed to have been magically wiped off, and from what she could spot through the windows, Luz was pretty certain that some bare furnishings had been added back to the home to make it more… liveable, she guessed.
Apparently, Hunter hadn’t even realized that this was where they had left… him. His body. She really didn’t like to think about it all that much…
Neither did he, as he vehemently refused to enter the home once they had finally wandered their way back into view of the place. They’d been lost for—days, maybe, she isn’t sure— until Hunter finally piped up with an odd feeling he had noticed.
“It’s like… if my brain’s quiet enough, I can feel myself in two places at once. I know where I am,” He had told her.
Luz didn’t know what it felt like to be connected to your own corpse in this way—she didn’t even think she had one to show for. If she focused hard enough, she could almost swear she felt herself just… everywhere . Maybe that was the best she was going to get.
In their disoriented states, Hunter’s weird premonition ended up being the only way they even managed to pinpoint the house.
She kept staring through the window, wondering if Eda and King might’ve moved back in… Hooty hadn’t—that she could already tell. It was the dead of night, sure, but she knew sometimes Eda and King liked to curl up on the couch after a long day, so she just hoped that maybe… no. Nothing.
It’s not like she’d be able to—or that she even should talk to them like this anyway. She didn’t want them to see her in this state. They could feel guilty, knowing the pain she was still going through, and then what? They’d have to worry about her all over again. She’d haunt their minds forever.
She couldn’t see her reflection in the window pane, but she imagined she would probably be a disturbing sight to behold too— judging by those early looks Hunter had given her.
When people died, they were supposed to escape pain and find peace. Good people, at least. Was this like her… her limbo? Purgatory? She was never much of a religious person, so she couldn’t even be sure those were the right words to use here.
All she knew for sure was that she had really, truly fucked up.
It was hard not to think about everything she wishes she could have told her loved ones.
Eda and King… she should’ve thanked them. They had helped her grow so, so much, and had been so welcoming and warm to her— from the bottom of her heart, she thought of them both as family. They didn’t have to do any of that for her—some random human girl from another realm. She felt horrible that they had to be there and witness what had ultimately happened to her.
Her mom and Vee… she hoped they wouldn’t be too upset with her. Both of them didn’t have the highest opinions of the demon realm, and were definitely wary of her returning to this place. They had trusted her out of their love for her, and now she was scared she had entirely let them down. She wished she could apologize. She wished she could cry in her mother’s arms just once more, and tell her she loved her.
Willow and Gus… they deserved to know that they weren’t at fault for any of this. She worried they both carried the weight of the world on their shoulders sometimes, and eventually the pressure of it all would just cause something to snap. She wanted to hug them so, so badly. She wanted to go back to those days where the three of them were just fooling around at Hexside; when all of their lives hadn’t collapsed around them just yet.
And… Amity. She desperately wished she had gotten the courage to be more honest with her. She had sealed all her awful secrets under lock and key, promising herself she’d open up to her girlfriend about them once she was ready—and now—now it was over. She hoped Amity wouldn’t hate her after this. She hoped she’d look back at their time together fondly. Although, she couldn’t blame her if she didn’t—
“Are you… going to go inside?” Hunter asked meekly from behind her.
Luz whipped around, wincing a bit at the bright blur of light that accompanied her quick movement. Hunter was standing a few paces away from her, nervously hugging his arms across his chest while keeping an eye on the house. Flapjack was hovering just around his head, like usual.
“If you’re not going in,” She swallowed, “Then I don’t want us to… separate.”
Hunter opened his mouth to speak, but she unintentionally beat him to it.
“Don’t worry, I don’t blame you for not wanting to… I don’t think I’d want to look at my body either…”
“My body isn’t in there,” he replied quietly.
This gave Luz pause. “What…?”
Without another word, he lowered his head and began to walk towards the side of the home. More than a bit perplexed, she trailed after her friend, eventually stopping behind him after he had led them both into the backyard of the owl house.
It only took her a second to understand what he wanted her to look at; what was right by their feet.
Two wooden markers embedded into the ground, separated from each other by several feet. Yet, still close enough to one another that it could be assumed they were meant to be placed together.
She wasn’t entirely sure why, but the markers struck her as something temporary—the one on the left had a messy ‘H.’ carved into its surface, while the one on the right displayed ‘L.N’ .
There were so many flowers of so many different kinds and colours resting by them. She could tell that someone—maybe many people—had absolutely taken their time to arrange these as carefully as they could.
…
“O—oh…” Luz heard herself whisper breathlessly, feeling lightheaded as the reality of this sunk in.
Hunter stood perfectly still beside her, staring at his—his grave. His expression was slack and distant, as if his mind was struggling to fully decipher what was in front of him right now.
Then, his shoulders began to twitch and his face twisted up in pain as he began to cry. His knees buckled not long after, and Luz quickly came down onto the ground with him, throwing her arms around him in a hug and pulling him close.
His head sank against her like a ragdoll, all the fight and energy completely drained from his soul. She felt every little tremble he gave off while he was held this close to her, and could hear every tiny hitch in his breath as he sobbed as faintly as he could possibly bring himself to. Flapjack placed himself right between them; a noble attempt at trying to provide some comfort for them both.
She was a bit shocked she hadn’t broken down into sobs too. She kept staring at the ‘L.N.’ … but she knew she wasn’t under it. She could just feel it. Her body existed everywhere in the air around her and nowhere all at once.
She had no idea what had been buried there underneath her initials, but she felt so disconnected from it she wondered if she should cry from just that fact alone.
The flowers, though… she recognized some of those. The pink and white lilies… the sight of those being gifted underneath her own name— it was too early for it to be her own name —stung her so deeply she had to avert her gaze almost immediately.
So, her mom had been here… and Amity must have been here too. She wondered what they thought of her now.
She was too afraid to actually find out.
—
They sat by their graves for a long while. Thankfully, the sun had yet to rise again.
Hunter might have fallen asleep against her at some point, although she couldn’t be entirely sure. The two of them had gone through an agonizing amount of trouble trying to fight their bodies into sleep these past few— she had no idea, to be honest —days.
The dead just couldn’t sleep, she figured. What good would it do for them?
Luz made sure to keep one arm wrapped around her unmoving friend, while using her free one to continue drawing glyphs in the dirt. They wouldn’t work, she knew that, but it still brought her a foolish sense of comfort to occupy her mind with something so familiar and important to her.
She’d imagine the feeling of wild magic sparking at her fingertips whenever she’d activate one of these.
Flapjack had come to watch what she was up to, and in her head she tried filling in the gaps for what she thought the little bird might want to say to her.
It helped, even if just the tiniest bit.
By the time it dawned overhead of the owl house, they had left. The only evidence of their presences were some faintly scribbled symbols in the earth.