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It was a cold winter night in the mountains. Living in a quaint house was a pair of lovers huddled together in front of the fireplace. The woman closed her eyes as she felt the familiar warmth of her husband's large and rough hands envelop her petite and delicate ones. She leaned closer to him, relishing in the comforting aura he excudes. "So comfy..." she mumbles, opening one eye to look at her lover. "Hey, Nene, wasn't it snowing when we first met?" he mused.
It was around two years ago. Nene was wandering in the snowy peaks of the mountain. It was a blizzard and she had nothing to keep herself warm other than the white veil she held over her head. It wasn't long before she wandered into a remote village. She paid no heed to the other residents and went straight to the house all the way in the back. There was a lone blond man in that house, a humble farmer named Tenma Tsukasa. She knocked on the door and asked for shelter. Tsukasa was so captivated by her beauty he almost forgot to let them both into his home.
The blizzard lasted longer than the two had imagined. They spent countless nights huddled together for warmth. Tsukasa was quite talkative, almost too talkative for Nene's taste. He often talked about his family. He had two younger siblings who he loved dearly. Their parents had died at an early age so he practically raised them. The three went their seperate ways, his sister went on to become a famed musician who travelled all the way to Europe and his brother had become a wandering samurai who followed nothing but the wind and waves.
Tsukasa asked about Nene. She told him that her village had been attacked and that she was the sole survivor. Ever since that day, she had been wandering day and night. With nothing more than her skills as a weaver, she made fabric and clothes in exchange for food and shelter. According to her, Tsukasa was the first person who did not search for anything in return and gave her sanctuary out of the goodness of his heart.
The two would eventually fall in love. Nene stayed long after the blizzard had ended. She was happy with Tsukasa, and it was clear he was happy with her. They recall their first kiss. It was also winter that day. Nene has been eyeing Tsukasa's lips for quite some time. He noticed her staring at him.
"What's wrong?" he asked.
"...My hands are cold," Nene muttered. He gladly held her hands. He put them in front of his mouth and let out a puff of warm air. "Better?" he looked at her. Nene's face was practically redder than the fire. "My lips are cold too, actually," she complained with a slight pout. He tilted his head like some sort of puppy before gasping in realization. "Aww, Nene! If you wanted a kiss you could've just asked!" he ruffled her hair and cuddled her closer. She huffed in protest. "I take it back!" she complained. "No takesies backsies!" Tsukasa declared, leaning in and giving her a quick peck on the mouth. She started heating up before putting a finger to her mouth.
"...My lips are still cold."
"Hmph. No need to remind me of my past shyness! I'm... still shy, but not that much anymore!" she punched her husband lightly in the chest. He laughed softly, resting his head on her's. "My lips are cold. Mind warming them up like back then?" she repeated the same words. Tsukasa smiled widely. "Of course, my lady!"
Winter ended just as fast as it started, leaving them in the nice season of spring. Tsukasa was meditating on the patio as Nene hung the laundry.
It was a peaceful day. Flowers were blooming and birds were chirping. Tsukasa opened one eye to admire his wife.
Once she was done with the laundry, she went over to a bush full of flowers and started to gather some, muttering about how some of the flowers will be given to the locals and others would make some for some fragrant soap. The sun beat down on her small frame making her shine like a star. Her eyes were focused on the task at hand, her graceful fingers grazing over the petals of the flowers so she wouldn't harm the fragile blooms.
She moved gently as to not disturb the pollinating bees. Satisfied with what she'd gathered, Nene placed the flowers into her basket and walked over to Tsukasa, instructing him to cut the stems of the red ones and pluck the petals of the pink flowers and hand them to her. He nodded and got right to work while she proceeded to sweep the ground.
She began to sing along the chirping of the birds. That was another thing Tsukasa loved about his wife. Her voice, which sounded like all the sweetest things in the world meshed together and came out of her mouth. He'd ask her to tell him all about her favorite things just so he could hear her voice.
"Your voice is beautiful," he commented. Nene turned to look at him with a surprised expression. He had been uncharacteristically quiet up until that point, just so he could give her time to be heard. It made her a little flustered and she swept the ground bashfully. "No, please! Keep singing!" he urged her. Nene really loved singing, but she wasn't used to having an audience. But still, she sung. And once again, her husband had fallen silent and she felt like she was in her own world where nobody could hurt her.
That afternoon, the two were outside on the patio. Tsukasa laid on her lap and admired Nene as she did embroidery. A question lingered her mind since this morning. She stopped and put her needle down, her face twisting into one she made when she pondered. Tsukasa looked at her with a concerned face. "What's on your mind?" he asked.
"If someday I no longer had my voice that you adore so much, if I could no longer sing as I do now, would you love me as you did before?" she looked at him. His eyes softened as he smiled gently at her. "But of course!" he replied, bringing his hand up to cup her face. She held his hand and felt relieved, leaning her face into his palm and relishing in his warmth. He always knew how to make her feel better about herself.
Summer rolled around and it was time for the harvest. Nene had grown tired from picking up crops all morning so Tsukasa carried her on his back and went to rest her on a nearby tree. "Tired already, Tenma?" one of the tenants handed her some water.
Hearing her get called Tenma still have her butterflies. She still couldn't believe that she was married. Married to Tsukasa of all people! It still felt so magical despite the fact that they've been together for nearly three years.
"Rui, you've known me long enough to call me by my first name, y'know? And besides, you know I don't fare well in hot weather," she puffed her cheeks and downed the water. She was more used to being cooped up inside the house doing what ever she pleased while Tsukasa gladly did all the more taxing outdoor work. Sometimes he didn't let her work at all, doing the chores inside as well so Nene had all the time in the world to focus on her hobbies. "Still, it's nice of you to come join us! You should talk to the ladies more, y'know! Get some friends, expose yourself to the world!" he laughed. "Oi, Rui, you better not be bothering my wife unless you know what's good for you!" Tsukasa threatened in a half-joking manner.
This was a regular occurance in their small village. Everyone was friends with everyone. Tsukasa, in particular, was the village's very own Sun in a way. Some elders joked that they'd have avalanche warnings much more frequently after Tsukasa moved in and that it had gotten much more lively.
One of the grannies called everyone over for lunch. Nene had gotten up to help the other ladies carry the vegetables to the stove when she noticed Tsukasa suddenly stop in his tracks. "Tsukasa?" she called out. He fell to his knees, dropping the basket of harvested goods as he covered his mouth and started coughing, blood seeping through the gaps of his fingers. She let out a shriek which alarmed everyone around them as she ran to her husband's side. The second she got a grip on his shoulder, he weakly looked up at her before passing out.
"Tsukasa! No, no no no! Wake up! Somebody help him! Please!" she pleaded, shaking him desperately. Some of the men picked him up and carried him to the village doctor while the women tried to calm Nene down. She was trying to fight them off so she could chase after Tsukasa, but she eventually gave in after exhausting herself from crying too much.
It wasn't like the usual summer at all.
Tsukasa was sleeping soundly in their home, face twisted into one of discomfort. Pained even in his sleep, Nene tried not to look at him and instead focus on the doctor's instructions.
"His condition is grave, and I'm afraid to say he may be terminal. There is medicine, but it is incredibly expensive. We could take him out of his misery right now and--"
"How much does the medicine cost?" Nene interrupted the doctor, desperation laced in her voice. "I'll do anything! Please, he can't die! He's all I have!" she pressed her forehead to the doctor's feet as she begged. "Alright, alright! Please stand, mrs. Tenma," the doctor knelt down to usher her head away from his feet.
Tsukasa woke up in a coughing fit that night. Nene ran to his side and rubbed circles on his back to soothe him. "What happened?" he asked, heaving. With a heavy heart, Nene was left to explain everything.
Something clicked in his mind and for a split second, Nene swore she saw all the emotion drain from his eyes. "It's how much? This year's harvest is barely half of that..." he mumbled, head buried in his hands. "I'm... I don't wanna die..."
Nene's breath hitched when she heard him mutter that. "I'll think of something! I won't let you die! I'll get you that medicine, you hear me?" she swore, grasping his trembling hands. "I can't have you working out there all by yourself," he shook his head. After all, what kind of husband would he be if he let his wife do all the work for him while he stayed useless in bed? "Please, Tsukasa. Let me save you the way you saved me!" she held him close as they both trembled, trying to keep their emotions under control. If Nene cried, Tsukasa would start too and it would be horrible for his recovery. "The least you can do for me is rest up and get as much energy back as you can, alright? You can do that for me, right?"
Left with no choice, Tsukasa nodded.
Nene wasn't the best when it came to cooking seeing as Tsukasa did it half of the time, but she managed to make something at least a little edible. Soups were good for sick people, at least that's what he always made for her when she got sick.
She did everything. Cleaning, cooking, gathering firewood. Tsukasa was asleep most of the time, and when he was awake he often looked at her guiltily. He wished he could help her. That was his job, after all. The role he signed up for the moment he began to court her. And he couldn't even fulfill it.
Every night, Nene retreated to a room where she weaved. She never tells Tsukasa where she gets the materials from, because it was a secret. Rolling up her sleeve, she plucked a feather.
Some time ago, in the snowy peaks of the mountains, a farmer heard the cries of a trapped bird as he was gathering firewood. He investigated the forest and found a crane trapped in a huntsman's net. The creature flailed and wailed, eyes begging the farmer to set it free.
"You poor thing," he thought as he grazed the bird's feathers delicately. "Don't move, I'll make this quick," he whispered to the bird as he began to slowly untangle the net, careful of where he touched so as to not startle the animal.
Once freed, the bird flapped its wings happily before taking off. "What a beauty," the farmer mused as the crane flew away and away.
Nene looked at her husband's sleeping form. "You saved me back then," she thought as she ran her hands through the woven material she had just finished. "Let me save you this time."
Tsukasa didn't laugh as much as he used to. The summer turned cold with every second that his body gave up on him. Whenever he tried to talk, he'd fall into a coughing fit and worry Nene even more.
She saw how miserable he looked whenever he saw her working all by herself. She was just as tired as him and yet he was unable to ease her. "That idiot..." she muttered to herself. "Worry about yourself for once."
In order to keep him busy, Nene gave him small tasks such as arranging the fabric, folding the laundry, or picking leaves off of vegetables. Sometimes she'd give him a pen and some paper so he could work on what ever he wanted since he was quite the playwright. She even managed to find his old koto and he occupied himself with music to entertain his wife. Small tasks that at least made him feel as if he was helping her.
And he did. It eased her mind knowing he was still strong enough to do that, he was still alive. It gave her the motivation to keep weaving.
Autumn rolled around. How long has it been since she last slept properly? Weeks? Months? "Not enough. I still need to weave," she thought as she counted the money she had saved up. If the doctor's estimate was correct, she had until the New Year to pay the medicine. Her fingers bled and she hurt herself. "Damn it!" she cursed as she cradled her injured hand. "No, I can't stop. Not until I get that damn medicine. I can't pity myself like this," she kept weaving.
A red maple leaf landed on her lap. "I can't let him die," she thought. She can't let Tsukasa's life fade alongside the maple trees. She'll get him that medicine even if it killed her.
"Your hands are so beautiful," Tsukasa said as he grazed his fingers over Nene's injured ones. Delicate as the winter snow outside, he kissed each one of her fingers. He left not a single part of her hand unloved. Warmth coursed through her veins as the part of her she hated the most was shown affection and adoration.
"They're covered in scars," she pointed out. "So what?" Tsukasa replied as he gently massaged her aching palms. "They're hideous. They're calloused, uneven and rough. They aren't dainty or delicate like the other ladies or how they used to be. Do you not find that repulsive?" she asked. "Nene, don't be ridiculous! No part of you could ever be hideous so don't --" he coughed loudly.
Nene went to get him some water. He drank it and his sore throat cried in happiness. She hugged him from behind as he continued to caress her fingers. "If someday I no longer had these hands, would you still love me?" she asked. "Of course I would," he answered.
"He's gotten worse," the doctor told Nene. It was two hours ago. Two agonizing hours ago.
Nene woke up to find Tsukasa missing. He wasn't next to her like he usually was. Moreover, she remembers falling asleep next to her loom the previous night. How on Earth was she in her futon?
Then it hit her. Tsukasa probably carried her there.
"That idiot!" she thought. She frantically searched the house and found him collapsed in the bathroom, hands covered in blood and breathing uneven. "Tsukasa!" she screamed as she carried him on her back. "Come on, we've come this far! You can't die on me now!" she begged as she laid him down and ran to get the doctor.
"Worse?" Nene repeated. "It's a miracle he's even alive. I'm afraid if he's not treated immediately, he will perish before January," the doctor solemnly informed the grieving woman. "The- the treatment... I-" Nene struggled to find words. She stared once again at the price of the medicine that would save the love of her life and realized that she was almost there. Almost. Just a little more.
She just needed more time. More time to weave. She'll weave. She'll stay with her loom until she dies and get that medicine for him.
That's right. She'll keep weaving.
"I'll save you, just hang on. Please," she begged her sleeping husband.
She won't stop weaving.
He stared at the falling snow outside, watching the sunset with eyes full of longing.
There was no time for her to sleep, she had to keep weaving.
When was the last time Nene had left her study?
More, more, more! She had to get that medicine. She had to save him. He was all she had so she must weave, weave, and weave some more!
The sunset was so beautiful. Almost fleeting. He coughed loudly and wished for his wife to come out of her study.
She plucked out as many of her feathers as she could. She had to weave. With nobody but her loom as a witness, she shed what little feathers she had left. She'd plucked so much off that the pain was numb to her now.
He stared at the night sky. The stars were so beautiful. He wonders if he would be as grand as them when he goes.
She did it. She had enough. Wasting no time, she ran to buy the miracle medicine. She was going to save him.
Reaching his hand out to the door of his house where his wife had just left, he felt so weak. He stared at the fruit that had fallen from a dead tree. He stood up, wanting to reach her, to see her in all her glory one last time, to smother her in all the love she could want one last time, remind her that she would never be alone. But his feet failed him, only to fall once more. His eyes wander to the sunset. It was so beautiful. And much like the fruit that had faded, he let the snow melt him away.
Nene returned home. She clutched the medicine tightly as she panted, the pain in her fingers and aching body finally setting in. She wobbly entered the house. Except.
No.
This wasn't true.
Tsukasa was laying on the ground, hand reaching for the door. His other hand was near his chest, the fabric over his heart wrinkled as if he had been gripping it. The stench of iron filled the house. The cold kiss of death overpowered the freezing winter as Nene stared at the love of her life.
She let out a shriek as she ran to him, careful not to drop the medicine. She held him close, pressing her ear to his chest as she desperately searched for a heartbeat, a breath. She begged him to move, to cough, just to show her any sign that he wasn't gone. He couldn't be gone.
He couldn't have left her. He promised her that nobody would abandon her ever again. "You're so cruel!" she buried her face into his chest. "Please, wake up! I worked so hard! This can't... you...!" she cried. Choked, ugly sobs left her lips.
Was this all a joke? A cruel prank by the universe? Did the stars laugh at her misery? Did they laugh at her face when they decided to take her star away?
And what about Tsukasa? Was he in pain? Did he die peacefully? Did the world mock him too by having him die painful and alone?
And oh, alone.
He was alone. Nene left him alone. He died without anyone to comfort him.
Nene looked into his eyes. The very same eyes the shone with adoration for her whenever his gaze landed on her. The very same eyes that melted her icy heart. They were so dead, devoid of all the life that made him definitively Tsukasa. He looked out into nothing, he saw nothing because he was nothing. Just a bag of flesh and bone waiting to rot. Unable to look into his dead eyes any longer, Nene shakily shut them and she laid him on his back. She put his hands over his chest and covered his face with a white cloth. She went out to pick some flowers but the second she placed them on his cold body, her legs gave out.
This was it. He was gone. He left her. What else was she supposed to do now?
She ran out of her house with her loom in hand. Their neighbors chased her, but she didn't stop. She ran to the forest where she was saved by a farmer who freed her from a huntsman's net. Nene fell to her knees and caressed her aching fingers.
"If some day I wasn't human," she rolled up her sleeve and plucked her final feather. "If I was a monster without my wings, without my beauty you adore so much," she reached for her loom. "Would you love me as you did before?"
She felt warm hands wrap themselves around her. Hands that felt all too familiar. "But of course," he whispered with a smile. "Remember our promise? I'll embrace you even if you didn't have wings. I still remember that crane," Nene heard him say as she sobbed. "I never once forgot you," he said.
"And as always, for forever, until the end, I will love you as before."
The residents of the village found Nene hugging herself with bloodied arms and a loom. She was smiling and surrounded by feathers. With heavy hearts, they reunited her with the love of her life as they were buried under a maple tree, in full view of the starry sky above where they can shine and fly freely.