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Gordon hadn't intended on coming this far.
Yet here he was, sitting right by Benrey as they played some dumb game together. Occasionally bumping knees, stealing glances, making awkward comments. Gordon didn't get it. He didn't understand these advances, if you could even call them that.
Benrey, some guy he met a couple months prior. The man who got his arm caught off, drove him up a wall, made him hate living. Benrey, the man who made everything in Gordon's life unbearable.
Key word: Made.
Gordon hated admitting how he started to grow accustomed to this life. To Benrey. He hated how the stupid, simple, bumping of their knees made him feel nervous. He hated how Benrey's side profile wasn't that bad. Maybe he'd even say it was pretty. But that's too far. He hated how Benrey's voice didn't fill him with anger or dread anymore. He hated how they started sleeping in the same bed. Started being more touchy-feely. Started making inside jokes, started watching movies together, started cooking dinner for each other, started being...
He didn't have another word to describe it...
Domestic.
"yo, are you even trying to win, bro?" Benrey's voice took Gordon out of his trance. Kind of slapped him in the face, actually.
"Whuh- Uh, yeah, man! Just fuckin- thinking, I guess" Gordon sighed as his character was KO'd, again. He decided to just place down his controller.
"bout what." Was Benreys flat response.
"It's not really anything important, honestly. Just me bein me."
"yooo, you can tell me. best friend benrey. i'm like the best at making shit better. we're like best friends forever, dude." Benrey followed suit, placing his controller down adjacent to Gordons, pausing the game.
Gordon laid back, staring at the ceiling as the dull whirring of their ceiling fan echoed in their mutual silence. He didn't know how to explain anything to Benrey. hey bro! just wondering if we're like gay?? like homosexuals lol? penis and what not? He couldn't just straight up ask Benrey if he liked dudes. He didn't wanna make the other man uncomfortable. So he decided just to ween his way into it.
"It's just like...man, I don't know...we've been living together for a while now and I just don't really know what you want I guess."
Benrey stared at him for a bit, thinking of a response. "what i want?"
"Yeah, I mean I feel like you want something more. From me, I mean. Like, I don't know if I'm seeing it wrong or what, but I feel like you like being together."
"uhh..yeah, i mean you're cool. we're cool. like best buds. pals n' shit. yknow."
"No, I mean yeah, we're friends, but I feel like you wanna be more...you feel me?"
"uhm." Benrey paused, popping his lips. "uh yeah, like uh...best pals, forever." He stood up and looked over at the wall. Gordon furrowed his eyebrows.
"No, dude, I mean closer than that, you know?"
"haha no...haha nah i don't get it tbh. gordo wants to be besty pals and best buds with best friend benny???"
Gordon sighed, pressing his temple in frustration. He didn't want to be blunt with Benrey. He felt weird just asking right out. Yo you wanna be bfs? But he didn't expect just how...avoidant? Oblivious? Benrey would be.
"Fuck, man! I mean gay. Like, boyfriends. Is that what you want, or what? Talk to me man, because I don't understand what you want out of me. Or what you're getting from being so lovey-dovey on me, okay?"
Benrey sat back down, an unreadable expression on his face, but Gordon was used to that. He stared at the floor, fidgeting with the hemline of his sweatpants.
"i dunno, bro...gordy wanna be gay with benny boy. all romantic n' shit. sounds ok...i dont mind....mine...diamonds."
Gordon tried to ignore the stupid shit coming out of Benrey's stupid mouth.
"You're game?"
"i mean yeah im game."
"Haha...cool."