Archive of Our Own

Chapter Text

Kuroo Tetsuro would probably never admit to anyone that being anything but himself was ridiculously easy. It required very little from him to put up a facade that pleased people. So little, in fact, that he chose to make a career out of it. Day in, day out, consult, reach out, say what needs to be said, get the most out of someone with knowing the very least about them. He can’t lie and say he didn’t enjoy it. It’s hard to hate something you succeed in. Yet, Tetsuro would soon learn the running theme in his life was that there was always something he missed.

He would think about when he used to meet his friends for drinks instead of running around, picking up others’ slack. He remembered when his private life was actually a life, and not just a break from his work. At his lowest, he remembered when he could even make time for another person in his life. Unfortunately, it seemed like it was too little, too late. Tetsuro Kuroo realized, three years into his career, during one especially cold winter, that he was creating a very lonely reality for himself. He feared that the thing he would miss, from now until eternity, would be that one other person. The proverbial "One".

It was in the midst of this breakthrough, on a cold Friday night, that he found himself being pulled out of his apartment by his friend and straight into the stuffy basement bar across the way from his apartment. It was in the midst of navigating his own psychological fog that he found the beginning of the rest of his life.

+++

The bar was slowly starign to fill up with people. It had as many booths and tables as could fit and a jukebox in the corner that only played hits from the eighties. Overall, it had one of the most average vibes Tetsuro had encountered, but it was close, and it was cheap.

Sugawara saddled up on a stool by the bar. “I’m sorry for getting you worked up about my broken ankle.” 

“Your fake broken ankle,” Tetsuro responded, grabbing a peanut from the bowl in front of them and inspecting it, leaning against the bar.

“You knew it was fake,” Suga teased. “That’s how I know you really wanted to come out.”

Tetsuro hummed in concession. “You know me so well.”

“Don’t I?” Suga looked smug as he waved down a bartender.

“So… Tetsuro finally settled onto a stool, peeking down the bar absentmindedly. “...what do you have planned for me this time?”

“Aw come on, can’t I just invite you out?” Suga gestured at the room theatrically. “When’s the last time you had a person-to-person interaction?”

Tetsuro shot him a look.

Suga rolled his eyes. “I’m talking about real interaction, like with real human people? Not all that fake flattery nonsense you do at work, with all those corporate freaks.”

Tetsuro frowned and made a noise that meant he didn’t feel like arguing, looking back at the bartenders. 

“All I’m saying is that I miss you, and I want to see you out. It’s good for you!” Suga said. “And I also don’t want to wake up one morning with a call from the city coroner saying that, yes you’ve died, but you’ve been dead for six months and they’ve just now discovered the body, and how sad is it that no one even knew—”

“OKAY.” Tetsuro interrupted before Suga spelled out his fictional fate which, as his days and the nights grew longer, seemed more and more like a possible reality. Suga had a point. He had missed their group’s last two weekly breakfasts, which, to their group, was like missing church.

“And while you’re here, might as well find a hot date.” Suga winked at Tetsuro. He didn’t trust that wink.

Tetsuro sighed and scanned the room, ready to get back at Suga with a well-aimed quip when he saw a man. He was tan, and had hair that had been styled so it stayed up and away from his face. He was handsome, but even more so when he happened to look at Tetsuro from across the room. Suddenly, everything around them blurred, the sounds around them faded away, and the man did something incredible.

He smiled.

It was one that reached his eyes and overtook his whole face and made him even more alluring. It was a smile that made it seem like they were the only two that existed in that room, in the world. Tetsuro was completely taken aback. He knew he would know the love of his life instantly, but he didn’t think the sensation would be this overwhelming. Then, Tetsuro thought something he had never dared to let himself think. Some deep, knowing part of him felt it, and it echoed throughout his entire body.

I’m gonna marry him.

“That guy you're staring at,” Suga was now glancing at where Tetsuro was otherwise occupied. “I know him.”

“What?” Tetsuro’s whipped his head around, his trance suddenly interrupted. “Suga, I swear, if it's another single dad you want me to meet, I’m leaving.”

“Relax, he went to my high school.” Suga grinned in an overly eager way. He handed Tetsuro his drink, which had been delivered in record time, and waved at the man who, to Tetsuro’s dismay, began to walk over. He could tell that Suga’s gears were beginning to turn. He was tooth-achingly sweet, and still, he loved to watch people squirm. Rarely could he get Tetsuro to do so, but when he did—

“Daichi!” Suga eagerly greeted the beautiful man, stepping in front of Tetsuro, who was now trying desperately to figure out what his first words to the stranger would be. “I can’t believe you’re here!” 

“Yeah, I just flew in a few days ago,” the man, Daichi, responded. His voice was deep and self-assured. Tetsuro caught himself staring and looked away quickly, gulping down his drink, studying the ice cubes. “But you already—”

“Well, isn’t that just great!” Suga exclaimed, almost too loudly. Tetsuro had to wonder how close they had been in school, and if Daichi knew about Suga’s endearingly complex personality.

As if answering Tetsuro’s question, Daichi smiled politely, seeming to be at a loss for words. Suga lightly held his shoulder, and in a typical fashion, led Daichi to Tetsuro with a line he loved to use with everyone, whether they liked it or not:

“Have you met Kuroo?”

+++

Kotaro Bokuto couldn’t remember how he ended up horizontal. In fact, he couldn’t make out much of what was going on at all, other than the fact that someone was shaking his shoulder. As he blinked the stars from his vision, he began to make out his boyfriend’s face hovering over him, his mouth moving. He could faintly hear his name being called and realized it was coming from his boyfriend. He couldn’t infer much else, other than he felt fine, and he was gripping a small box in his hand.

“...Kotaro? Bokuto, hello?” Keiji’s face slowly came into focus.

“Keiji?,” Kotaro said, slowly getting up. Keiji gently pressed his hand on Bokuto’s back, helping sit upright. “What happened? How long was I out?”

Keiji put his hand on Kotaro’s knee. “Not long at all, though I did have to lower you to the floor.”

“Oh god, I’m sorry!” Kotaro rubbed the back of his neck. “What happened?”

“Well, um…” Akaashi pushed his glasses up his nose and looked down at the floor, a light pink blush starting to bloom over his ears. “You came in here, we were talking, and then I went to get something from our room. When I came back you were down on one knee,” Akaashi paused, picking up a ring, “with this.”

Kotaro immediately sat straight up, seeing stars again. “I can’t believe it, I totally forgot!” Suddenly, his day came back to him. He had woken up in the morning and knew it was the day he would ask his boyfriend to marry him. He remembered telling Kuroo, about his plan before lunch and how ecstatic his friend had been. He remembered that, by the end of the day, he knew when and where and how he would ask. He remembered coming into their apartment, having carried the ring in his pocket the entire day. He had barely been able to contain his anticipation in asking Akaashi to marry him, after almost six years together. Kuroo had said this was something special, a new chapter for their little group. Depending on, of course, Keiji's answer to Kotaro’s question. 

“Did you say yes?” Kotaro asked eagerly.

“Well, yes, of course.” Keiji’s blush deepened a shade. “That’s why you passed out.”

Kotaro leaned forward and embraced his boyfriend tightly. There wasn’t anything more that he could say that would make this moment better. All he could do was celebrate with his now-fiance, and plan to always tell the story of how he was so happy to get married to Keiji that he fainted.

He pulled away from the hug, staring at the color that was now crawling down Keiji’s neck. “I can’t believe you’re turning so red right now! I mean, I didn’t know I could still get you so flustered!”

“You know I blush easily,” Keiji mumbled, still unable to look Kotaro in the eyes. He knew this was Keiji at his most ecstatic. To Kotaro, he was thrilled. They both were. “Besides, you literally fell for me. Who else can say that?”

Kotaro laughed out loud. “I’m so happy!” he blurted out, suddenly realizing his own unexpressed excitement. “We’re getting married!”

“I know,” Keiji replied. “I’m so glad you waited until your prefrontal cortex was developed before asking me to marry you, I think it’s good judgment.”

“What about you though?” Kotaro challenged, grinning. “How do you know you want to marry me so bad if you yourself haven’t got that far?"

Keiji laughed and finally met Kotaro’s eyes, smiling so wide Kotaro thought he was going to cry. Instead, he cupped Kotaro’s cheek and kissed him deeply. They breathed each other in, so familiar, and now, soon to be, lifelong.

Keiji pulled back gently. “I’m so happy too.”

The kiss grounded them, as it had done a thousand times before. They had each other, and that was all they either of them ever wanted.

+++

After dropping his one-liner, Suga stepped away from the newly united pair, chatting animatedly with the bartender. Despite how much Suga had matured, Daichi could still count on him to have something up his sleeve. He didn’t count on, however, that the something would be an extremely attractive man, nor that the something would be here, now, during the first week in a brand new city. It was almost too much. Almost.

“Hi.” The man stood up from his stool and reached his hand out. “I’m Kuroo. Kuroo Tetsuro.”

“Sawamura Daichi,” he responded, shaking his hand. “Nice to meet you.”

It fell silent for a beat before Kuroo spoke up. “What a crazy coincidence that you happened to be here tonight!” He sipped his drink. Daichi noticed that it was already half-empty.

“Yeah,” Daichi said hesitantly, not knowing if he should make the other man privy to the real reason Suga had been able to introduce them so casually. “Really crazy.”

“You said you flew a few days ago?” Kuroo asked smoothly, pushing the conversation along. Daichi felt bad for giving him little to work with, but it seemed like Kuroo had the conversation skills enough for both of them. Daichi also tried to stop thinking about Suga’s schemes long enough to focus on the conversation, but it seemed as though that would pose a problem, as well.

Kuroo was…something else. At worst, the way he did his hair was kind of strange. At best, he was tall, taller than Daichi. He had come to a bar on a Friday night wearing a three-piece suit. He was drinking some dark liquor, and he was tall. Daichi didn’t even get a chance to talk to him before he had been hooked on Kuroo’s magnetic pull, the feeling he got through a smile from across a crowded bar. He almost didn't want to ruin the facade by engaging with him. Kuroo was someone Daichi would be fine just staring at. He almost wanted to excuse himself and walk away, back to the considerably less intimidating person he was chatting up before.

Almost.

“Yeah, I was coming from America,” Daichi replied. “I was on a long vacation, trying to see if I liked it any better than here.”

Kuroo nodded. “Are you from Tokyo?”

He asks a lot of questions , Daichi thought, but responded anyway. “No, but I went to university here.”

“Where are you from?” Kuroo asked immediately. Daichi suddenly felt like he was on the spot, like Kuroo had figured something out about him, but Daichi wasn’t exactly sure what.

“Oh, Miyagi,” Daichi replied hesitantly. Maybe he did feel slightly unnerved by Kuroo’s gaze, his intent to figure Daichi out, but he was determined to not let it show. Even more so, he was determined to go toe to toe with this handsome stranger. Mutual friend, whatever he was becoming. “How about you? Are you from around here?”

“Ah, Miyagi’s lovely,” Kuroo responded, ignoring Daichi’s attempt to flip the line of questioning. “I’m from Fukushima, and then I moved to Tokyo, but I’ve been to Sendai a few times. Definitely different from here.” Kuroo looked back at Daichi, still smiling, almost like he was challenging him. He now knew more about Kuroo than Daichi knew about him, and yet it didn’t feel that way. Somehow, this man had begun to worm his way into Daichi’s head, and Daichi didn’t hate it. In fact, it happened much without Daichi noticing; it was almost impressive.

“Miyagi isn’t just Sendai,” Daichi responded. He wouldn’t let Kuroo win so easily. What the competition was, exactly, Daichi wasn’t entirely sure, and he wasn’t entirely sure Kuroo was even in on it, but Daichi would still, definitely, not lose. “I’m not sure you can say you’ve been there if you’ve just been to Sendai.”

Kuroo put his hands up in mock defense. “Hey, that’s fair.”

Daichi smiled and sipped his drink. This was easier than he had anticipated. The initial feeling of intimidation had begun to ebb, and was slowly giving way to tentative familiarity, as if he had known Kuroo for far longer than a few minutes. Maybe Suga had actually taken some time to think about this.

As if reading Daichi’s mind, Kuroo spoke up. “I’m sorry if this breaks the mood, but I have to ask.” Kuroo paused, squinting his eyes slightly, then looked up at Daichi. “Suga set this up, didn’t he?”

“I didn’t know you knew him so well.” Daichi laughed into his cup. “Yeah, I texted him when I got into town to see if I could maybe have a friendly face around, and he invited me here.”

“And he didn’t tell you it was a set-up?” Kuroo laughed with him, and they silently shared their mutual fascination with their mutual friend’s habits. “Sounds like him.”

Daichi hummed, smiling. “We weren’t super close in high school, but he’s kind of always been that way. Always moving people around. Always figuring someone else out.”

“Always wanting to have the most fun,” Kuroo added.

Daichi chuckled. “Yeah, exactly.”

Kuroo eased into the stool behind him. “Are you going to be here long?” he asked. Daichi watched as he brought the glass to his lips and sipped, watched the way his eyes seemed to follow Daichi’s individual movements as he sat next to him. It was unnerving. It was also, Daichi thought, very attractive.

“In Tokyo?” Daichi asked, distracted. “Ah, yeah, I think so.”

“America wasn’t for you, then.” Kuroo said it more like a statement than a question, now keeping his eyes on Daichi’s, rather than elsewhere.

Daichi had to focus. He was getting ahead of himself. “No, unfortunately. It’s all a bit too much over there. I thought I could maybe get a job there, but the vacation turned out to be just that, in the end.”

Kuroo hummed, as if really thinking about Daichi’s words. “What do you do?”

“I’m an EMT,” Daichi said.

“Wow!” Kuroo seemed genuinely enthralled. “That’s incredible! Probably pretty hard though, huh?”

“Yeah I mean, it’s just like any other job,” Daichi agreed. “But I love it. I just want to be able to take care of people, keep them safe.”

“Of course.” Kuroo nodded thoughtfully. Daichi wanted him to say something about Daichi’s life mission, wanted him to make an underhanded comment on the corniness of what he just said, maybe even a sarcastic quip that he knew this man was capable of, but he didn’t. He just looked at Daichi intently, like he was the most interesting person he had ever interacted with. Daichi suddenly realized how self-conscious he was at the sheer earnestness with which Kuroo was acting. He didn’t seem like the type of man to have an earnest bone in his body. He seemed like a man that would talk up just about anyone, complimenting them because it was his nature. His coyness with Daichi didn’t seem too misplaced, and yet, here he was, looking at Daichi differently than anyone had looked at him in a long time. It was refreshing, and still, Daichi couldn’t shake the familiar unease that had the nasty habit of sneaking up on him when he needed it the least.

“Can I buy you another drink?” Kuroo asked, bringing Daichi out of his spiral. Kuroo motioned to Daichi’s cup with his own, which he now realized was almost empty.

“No, thank you,” Daichi sighed resolutely, setting the glass down on the bar, where it was quickly swept up by a bartender. “I have to get going soon. Early morning.”

“Aw, we were just getting started!” Daichi was slightly amazed that Kuroo looked genuinely disappointed. Daichi wanted to entertain the fleeting idea that his snap judgments about Kuroo were wrong before remembering that he prided himself in knowing how to read people almost instantly. He was rarely ever wrong.

“I’m sorry,” Daichi said, trying to put on as much sympathy as he could muster. He really did want to keep chatting with Kuroo, but his unease was turning into nervousness, the kind of nervousness he felt when a whole lot of nothing had the possibility of turning into something. He’d had that feeling very few times in his life. He didn’t know if he was quite ready for it again.

He turned from the bar and faced Kuroo, trying to wrap up the goodbye. “It was great to meet you, Kur—”

“Do you want to have dinner with me?” Kuroo asked the question abruptly, like he was trying to get the words out before anyone could stop him. His tone was different from the one he had been flaunting earlier, but only just.

It was almost as though he was…

+++

“Nervous!” Tetsuro slid into a chair. “Did I make an ass of myself? I don’t remember.”

“You rarely don’t.” Suga replied, grinning.

“I know that was a joke, but it still hurts,” Tetsuro said wryly, his hand on his chest.

The morning after Tetsuro had asked Daichi to dinner—or the morning after the apparent set-up Suga had orchestrated had gone exactly as he planned—they were at a resturant downtown, squeezing in a quick breakfast before they started their day. They had all sat down at what seemed like the tiniest table in the restaurant, and Akaashi had his paper open to the crossword. Bokuto accidentally bumped him as he sat down, causing Akaashi’s pencil to mark a huge line down the page.

“Ooh, sorry Kei!” Bokuto set four large coffees and a bag of pastries down on the table, barely avoiding the vase that sat delicately in the center.

Akaashi groaned. “Maybe if we had picked a bigger table this wouldn’t be an issue,” he said pointedly, looking a Suga.

“Hey, I’m sorry you guys are such huge freaks of nature,” Suga replied, earning a flick on the arm from Akaashi, “but I wanted to get a good spot for people-watching. It's my favorite Saturday morning pastime. Just look at everyone. It’s Saturday at 8 o’clock in the morning, who knows where they could be going!”

“I think your people-watcher vibe is scaring people,” Tetsuro chided, sipping his coffee. “Look how fast they're walking. It’s because of you.”

Tetsuro felt a kick from under the table and grinned.

Rolling his eyes, Suga turned his attention back to the group’s table. “So, Akaashi, I know I’m not to disturb you during your morning ritual, but what is that thing on your finger?”

Tetsuro turned quickly to look at Bokuto, who glanced at him and nodded, smiling hard. He was bouncing his leg and tapping his fingers on the table; an old habit, one that thinly veiled Bokuto’s level of excitement.

“Oh, this?” Akaashi hummed, a small smile growing over his expression. “It’s my engagement ring.”

There was a sudden uproar at their tiny table. Suga jumped, yelling, almost knocking over their precarious breakfast. Tetsuro smacked Bokuto on the back, congratulating him over Suga’s gushing. Bokuto was trying to explain where he had got the ring, how hard it was, how he had to fight some lady for it. Tetsuro hoped that the last part was an exaggeration. Suga got right down to business, chattering about the wedding. Akaashi nodded, only half-listening, but looking delighted in the involvement nonetheless. Tetsuro knew that their babbling probably didn’t gain the attention of nearly anyone in that cafe, but at that moment, if everyone in that cafe had stood up and started cheering for them, it wouldn’t have felt out of place. In that moment, he felt like their little group was at the center of the world.

Once their overlapping conversation had died down, a few jokes having been cracked about the wedding night, the bachelor party, and everything in between, Tetsuro’s mind wandered back to the previous night.

Bokuto nudged Tetsuro lightly, breaking his self-induced trance. “So, now that my fiance is more committed to a crossword than me—” Tetsuro peeked a smirk from Akaashi, “—what’s this I hear about you and a date?”

Tetsuro glanced at Suga, who quickly darted his eyes away from him and back to his people-watching window. He had filled the rest of the group in, apparently. Tetsuro suddenly felt annoyed at his own lack of punctuality to their Saturday breakfast.

“Yeah, I actually met someone last night,” he said. “Someone special, I think.”

“Well, it's about time!” Bokuto said. “What’s their name?”

Tetsuro suddenly felt like he was on the spot. There had been a few people he had dated since college, but nothing seemed to stick. His friends enthusiastically, sometimes overtly desperately, tried to help him, bless them. Suga would set him up with random single parents, Bokuto would encourage him in any relationship he had, even mediocre ones, and Akaashi, always ready to give a life lesson at any moment, tried to coach him after every date he dared mention in his presence. He assumed this time around wouldn’t be much different.

“His name is Sawamura Daichi,” Tetsuro responded.

“Okay, cool name, good start,” Bokuto said, his eyebrows furrowed together.

“Is he hot?” Akaashi asked, not looking up from his paper.

“Yes!” Suga chimed in, his attention back to the table. “I can vouch for that.”

“Is he just hot?” Akaashi was now looking up from his paper at Tetsuro. Tetsuro suddenly felt like he was being accused of something.

“No, actually ,” Tetsuro responded to Akaashi’s pointed stare. “He’s nice and easy to talk to, and mysterious, too.”

“So, he is just hot then,” Akaashi said.

Suga snickered.

Tetsuro rolled his eyes. “Please, like you hopped on Bokuto for his personality?”

Bokuto faked a loud gasp of surprise, his hand on his chest. Akaashi suddenly turned very pink, glaring at Tetsuro from over his paper. “That doesn’t matter, I’ve actually stayed with Bokuto because I do like his personality.”

“No way!” Tetsuro protested, grinning. “Any story either of you tell about falling in love is just a long-winded way of both of you thinking that you couldn’t not jump each other’s bones. Even if you did end up really liking each other, you can’t come for me for starting something on a superficial basis when you did the exact same thing.”

Both Bokuto and Suga laughed out loud, and Akaashi turned bright red. “Whatever,” he said from behind his paper, “just don’t come crying to me when this new man ends up being too boring, or too exciting, or too busy, or not busy enough, or whatever excuse you come up with that makes it so terrible to be in a relationship with him.”

Tetsuro felt himself tense ever so slightly, staring at the back of Akaashi’s paper. Akaashi had an annoying habit of telling the truth at inconvenient times, especially if it meant getting the last word in. Bokuto liked that about him because he liked to do the same thing, albeit in a far gentler way. It was why they worked so well together. Tetsuro, on the other hand, hated being told the truth, especially if it was a truth he had planned to confront in his own time.

Bokuto cleared his throat, playing with the wax paper from their pastries. “But this guy is really cool, right?” he asked, clearly trying to ease the pressure.

“I actually set them up!” Suga said proudly, his preschool teacher charm coming in to save their breakfast. “I knew Daichi was coming to Tokyo so I wanted them to meet. He told you that, right?”

Tetsuroo was still staring at Akaashi’s paper, but unclenched his jaw to respond. “Yeah, I kind of figured that out.”

“See, then you two could bond over something mutual!” Suga exclaimed. “See how clever I am?”

Tetsuro, lost in his own thoughts, barely registered what Suga was saying, but bobbed his head nonetheless. “There’s something about him, I don’t know.”

“Exactly!” Bokuto practically yelled. “That means something, I know it!”

“And you asked him to dinner?” Suga prompted.

“Yeah, I did.” Tetsuro thought back to the way he had asked, and suddenly he was embarrassed all over again. He tore his eyes away from Akaashi’s paper and ran his hand over the back of his neck. “You think it was too much?”

“How so?” Suga asked. “Like too soon?”

“No way,” Bokuto cut in. “If you know, you know.”

“I didn’t even ask for his number first,” Tetsuro said, grimacing slightly at the memory. “I just went straight to ‘Dinner?’”

Suga waved his hand around. “Daichi doesn’t care about stuff like that. I’m sure he was very charmed by your enthusiasm.”

“Maybe he was,” Tetsuro responded. He looked back to the top of Akaashi’s head, distracted by his silence. They had known each other for so long, but sometimes it still freaked Tetsuro out that Akaashi could read the people around him so well. He only spoke if he knew he was right, and Tetsuro hated that he was feeding Akaashi’s ego with this exact conversation, one they’ve all had with Tetsuro multiple times before. It was the one where they reassured Tetsuro in his actions, where they reminded him of his own enthusiasm, and where he duly accepted their advice only for him to make all the wrong choices and, just like Akaashi said, come back annoyed, frustrated, and, most of the time, very upset.

Tetsuro threw his head back and groaned exaggeratedly, trying to cut past the pity party his friends were now planning to throw him.

“Are you okay?” Akaashi’s short tone was edging on sarcastic.

“I’ll be fine,” Tetsuro replied shortly, pushing his seat back from the table. He suddenly felt like he was suffocating.

Bokuto grabbed the vase to prevent it from falling over. “Okay, well if you need—”

“I gotta go, big day, big night, the whole works.” Tetsuro, now cringing at the fact that he had interrupted his friend, busied himself putting on his coat as fast as humanly possible.

“Ah okay.” Bokuto smiled lightly. Tetsuro tried not to see what his smile betrayed. Suga and Akaashi waved, a chorus of “see you later”s following him. He could feel himself shutting down as he stepped away from breakfast and out into the brisk winter. Akaashi had damned him to a morning of self-reflection, and he damned Akaashi right back.

+++

Akaashi Keiji considered himself a civil, well-rounded member of society. He went to high school, got good grades, and graduated university with a degree in Literature, and has since been pursuing various opportunities in his field ever since. He wanted to make the decisions that would determine work that was quality and work that wasn’t. He wanted to take what he learned and put it to good use. As luck would have it, the only position he found after graduation was in Tokyo at a rather fluffy magazine company. It had the rigor of any weekly publication, but lacked the substance in its content that Keiji had been looking for. It would do for now; he ultimately planned to use it as a stepping stone to higher levels. Keiji was also lucky that Kotaro was more than happy to figure out his own career in Tokyo, after willingly uprooting the work he had put in post-graduation, in order to move in with his boyfriend. There were plenty of teams based in the city that would match Kotaro’s larger than life personality, and he had assured Keiji as much. Keiji’s life felt secure, safe, and simple, and it had been so for the past two years.

It was because of this, on a Saturday morning, when he should be happier than he had ever been, he couldn’t fathom the amount of convincing he was now having to put himself through. He was happy. He was happy his friends were so supportive. He was ecstatic that Kotaro was so excited. Just watching his reaction at Keiji saying yes was enough to pull him through the inevitable wave of anxiety that he’d had about planning their ceremony, their partnership, and everything that came after. And yet, he couldn’t shake the feeling of deep dread that had been following him around for the past twelve hours. It followed him to bed with Kotaro. It followed him to the bathroom, to the living room, to the kitchen, to his closet, to sleep. He was more than used to the anxiety that had unceremoniously tethered itself to him since early childhood. He was not prepared, however, for it to double in size and weight when he saw his future was perfectly laid out in front of him, that no matter what, Kotaro would be there. He had the security he had always wanted and, in a rather perfect betrayal of himself, his relationships, and Kotaro at once, he felt awful.

And so, on a Saturday morning at breakfast, he was angry at himself. He drank his coffee, he did his crossword, and he snapped at Kuroo. He had created a rift between them, and with it, had become even more upset.

He sighed, penciling in a word that didn’t even fit, and huffed louder than he intended. Kotaro and Sugawara were chatting about their plans for the day, but paused when Kotaro looked over to see what caused Keiji’s mini lapse in self-regulation.

“Crossword trouble?” Kotaro asked. “I can help!”

It was misplaced enthusiasm.

Keiji mustered up the last of his civility. “Yes, but I’m okay, Kotaro, thank you. We have to get going soon, anyway.”

“Ah, right!” Kotaro stood up and gathered his bag from where it hung on the back of his chair. He faced Suga as he did so. “Serious legal business.”

“I’ll follow you guys out!” Suga said. “I got some errands to run.

They cleared the table and stuffed whatever leftover trash they had into their bags. Keiji grabbed his bag and jacket and adjusted Kotaro’s scarf so it would cover his entire neck. As they walked out, the frigidity forced them further into their coats.

“Good to see you, Suga!” Kotaro waved goodbye from his hunched position. Keiji waved too, cursing himself that he hadn’t brought either of them more layers.

“You guys, too! See you later!” Suga waved and trekked in the opposite direction.

Keiji let out a huff and they walked a few paces before Kotaro spoke up. “Okay so, want to tell me what that whole breakfast showdown was about?”

Keiji knew that was coming. He wondered why Kotaro couldn’t just leave it be. He hunched further into his coat’s collar. “It’s nothing. I’m just stressed thinking about everything we have to do.”

Kotaro paused. “And that’s Kuroo’s fault because…?”

Keiji was silent.

“You know how he gets,” Kotaro said, rather unconvincingly, then he sighed. “He just needs to be talked down.”

“Every time?” Keiji asked. He didn’t know or like how this had become a discussion about his own behavior, but it must have meant that Kotaro thought he was only concerned with Kuroo's tendencies and nothing else. Keiji felt another wave of anxiety wash over him as he realized Kotaro didn’t know the depth of his apprehension, and because, most of all, Keiji couldn’t begin to think of how to explain it.

“He’s our friend, remember?” Kotaro said gently.

“I know, I just—,” Keiji let out a sharp noise, “I just want everything to be perfect, and I want to be able to get everything we need to get done, done, and I’m worried we won’t get it all figured out before your season starts.” He hiked his bag farther up his shoulder. “I’m having trouble rationalizing thinking about other people’s problems.”

At least that part wasn’t a lie.

Kotaro stopped, his bright eyes peeking over his scarf. He reached out and stopped Keiji from continuing down the sidewalk. 

“You know we’ll figure this out, right?” Kotaro held both of Keiji’s shoulders. They were facing each other. Keiji was unable to look Kotaro in the eyes. His intense stare was something he loved about Kotaro, but right now it was just too much. “We’ll be able to do everything we need to do, and everything will work out, because we’ll be together.”

Keiji wanted nothing more than to agree with Kotaro, to grab Kotaro and never let go, to tell him all his hopes, fears, and dreams. He wanted to demand they both run away from everything and live a life that required little more than an occasional visit to the convenience store, where he could read and write for the rest of his life, and maybe grow some flowers, but he couldn’t. He couldn’t because he knew Kotaro would do it in a heartbeat. He would figure out having both his career and the man he loved wherever they both were if he knew it would make Keiji happy. He knew the sacrifices this man had made for him, and that to ask anything more would possibly be the most selfish and cruel thing Keiji could do. He knew all this because he loved Kotaro, more than the word could even convey, and he couldn’t bear to see anything keep him from what made him shine.

Right now, Keiji could only try to keep himself from crying on the street, in front of his fiance. He could only nod silently and lean into Kotaro’s arms for a quick hug. He could only take a deep breath and continue walking, and deal with the future as it came to him.

“And, as long as you don’t scare them away, we’ll have our friends around too!” Kotaro teased, squeezing Keiji’s hand quickly before letting go.

Right now, Keiji could only laugh quietly, and love Kotaro, and have that be enough to quell the slowly growing pit in his stomach.

+++

Tetsuro gave a quick once over on his suit in the mirror, brushing down the sleeves on his jacket. It was far more casual than the one he had met Sawamura in, but he tried not to think about it too much. When was the last time he felt this much apprehension about anything, much less a date? He had actually come home at a normal time in order to prepare for the date. It was a date right? Does dinner mean a date? He and Sawamura had never actually agreed on the title of what they were doing. He adjusted his collar and stared at the small bouquet of flowers on his dresser.

He left his room down one bouquet, stepping into the living room of the apartment he shared with his newly engaged friends. Akaashi was reading the latest issue of the magazine he worked at, his face slightly pinched. Tetsuro could hear Bokuto cooking something in the kitchen, no doubt instant ramen he “prepared” with an egg and some chopped scallions; a household favorite.

He cleared his throat, loudly. Akaashi turned to glance at him.

“You look nice,” Akaashi said. He sounded painfully neutral.

“Thanks.” Tetsuro tugged his jacket down, trying his best not to demand an apology or worse, comment on the contents of Akaashi’s choice of light reading. He wanted to start off the night on the right foot, and being the bigger person seemed like a good decision.

Bokuto stepped out of their kitchen, two steaming bowls in hand. He eyed Tetsuro and Akaashi, gauging the tension of the room. “Kei, I got dinner!”

“Thank you, Kotaro.” He had turned away from Tetsuro and smiled gently at his fiance, who placed the bowls onto their low eating table with a flourish.

Tetsuro had learned over the seven years they had all known each other that Bokuto had never done well with tension of any kind. Once, during their time at university, he had taken so long to voice an issue he had about his living situation that he ended up face first in a dumpster, looking for the only copy of his important final paper. Tetsuro loved that story. After a few more like it, it seemed as though conflict resolution became Bokuto’s number one priority. He was certainly learning.

“Kuroo, you look good!” Bokuto sounded like a dad congratulating his child for a participation trophy. “You ready for the date?”

Tetsuro blew out a breath. “I think so. Might as well go for it, right?”

Akaashi hummed. Tetsuro wanted to ask him what, exactly, that hum had implied.

Bokuto cleared his throat. “What do you think, Kei?” he asked.

Tetsuro held back an eye roll. God, did he want to strangle him. Akaashi was stubborn, and Tetsuro was proud. That wouldn’t change with a few of “I feel…” statements.

“I think he looks really nice.” Akaashi said nonchalantly. “He always does.”

Tetsuro grit his teeth. Akaashi knew that he absolutely hated it when people talked about him like he wasn’t there. He knew Akaashi was acting like this on purpose. He tried to not let it get to him, but it was still infuriating.

“Glad to hear it,” Tetsuro said pointedly, snatching his coat and scarf off the hat rack, trying not to rip it off the wall. “See you guys later.”

Bokuto smiled awkwardly at Tetsuro, still glancing between him and Akaashi. Tetsuro looked back at him and shook his head slightly. Even if Akaashi drove him up the wall, he really didn’t want Bokuto to worry about it. Besides, there were other things to be anxious about right now. Namely, the date to which Tetsuro was about to be late.

+++

Daichi stood out in the cold, covering the lower part of his face with his scarf. He gripped the hand warmers in his pockets, still trying to get used to the type of chill Tokyo was capable of. He had been spoiled by California’s winter. As he folded further into himself, he could only think about the night before. He was nearly dazed at the speed with which Kuroo had asked him to dinner, so much so that he had immediately said yes. Daichi had never seen a man so handsome so visibly thrilled in his life. He hated to admit it to himself, but it was extremely charming.

They had settled on a time and place rather quickly before Daichi had to keep the promise to himself about going to bed early. Even still, the thought of dinner the next day had kept his mind occupied. He couldn’t keep his mind from racing, then or now. Would Kuroo be the same? Was his excitement a front in the way Daichi assumed it was? He wondered how serious a man like Kuroo could even get. He looked like he did something highly professional for work. Surely, it took up a lot of time…

Fortunately, Daichi was pulled out of his quickly devolving train of thought by someone speed walking toward him in a long winter coat. As he looked up he recognized the figure almost instantly. It was that damn hair.

“Sawamura!” Kuroo was practically jogging as he came up the sidewalk, his breath coming out in visible puffs. He was wearing a large coat, a scarf hanging loosely around his neck. Just barely, Daichi could see the suit jacket and dress shirt hidden by his winter garb, and couldn’t help but notice that the top two buttons of his shirt were undone. Daichi knew there was no way that wasn’t intentional. He felt like a character in a grocery store romance novel. He needed to get a grip.

“I’m so sorry…I’m late.” Kuroo took a few deep breaths, his hand on his chest. His scarf billowed out behind him with a puff of the wind, but he barely noticed. He had locked eyes with Daichi. “I had a mix-up in the downstairs of my apartment building, and I had to help an older woman who thought I was her grandson.’ He smiled slightly.

Daichi started to laugh, but noticed that Kuroo kept up his breathy, earnest demeanor, and suddenly Daichi caught himself. A little too late.

“Wait, are you serious?” Daichi put his hand up to his face, quickly embarrassed.

“Yeah of course I’m serious!” Kuroo’s mouth dropped open slightly, but a grin was slowly inching across his face.

Daichi could feel his face getting red. He couldn’t even look Kuroo in the eye. The date hadn’t even started and already he was making terrible assumptions about the man he was supposed to try to get to know. “God, I am so sorry. I really thought you were joking and made something up to…soften the blow of being late, I guess.”

Kuroo laughed out loud. Daichi didn’t think it was that funny, but something about Kuroo being amused at the situation made Daichi feel immediately less anxious.

“No, it’s a real story. The woman lives in my building and that happens sometimes with me and my roommates. I think because we’re all super tall.” Kuroo sighed his glee away, still grinning. “That is something I would do, though.”

Daichi made a noise, incredulous. He had absolutely zero read on this man. “No way! I’m so embarrassed, but, you would actually make up an excuse?” He tried to look as serious as possible, but he felt himself starting to smile right back, completely enthralled.

“Well, yeah,” Kuroo said casually, looking at Daichi again. “But not with anyone I really like.”

Daichi paused at this. He was glad his face was still red, or else he would have to figure out a way to explain himself. He didn’t want to, not yet. It felt far too soon. He knew how well he could fall, but doing so this hard and fast had only ever spelled disaster for him.

Instead, Daichi rolled his eyes and beckoned Kuroo toward the door of the restaurant. “Okay, you can lay all that on inside . We’re gonna miss our reservation.”

“What a gentleman,” Kuroo said teasingly, still looking at Daichi.

Daichi shooed him forward. He was on a date with a shameless flirt, but he wouldn’t let himself get swept up so easily.

+++

As the night carried on, both Daichi and Testuro realized how much they had in common. They were both the captains of their respective high school club volleyball teams. While neither team had gone very far in any kind of tournament, they both loved what they did. Daichi had even kept in touch with all of them, boasting some pretty notable names on his contact list. Tetsuro boasted that he had now worked with every one of them at his job, keeping the love for volleyball alive and well in the youth of Tokyo. His sights were set even further, to spread it to all of Japan, and then the world, but it was a dream that he had worked unwanted and unthinkable hours to work towards, and it was a dream he never wanted to give up.

Daichi didn’t think he had one bright dream, but rather knew, quite simply, that he was meant to help people. He knew he could let others shine brighter than himself if it meant they were safe, if they could become all they were meant to. He understood the necessity of a foundation, a solid base that was unwavering, so that the people around him didn’t have anything to worry about. He understood that some people were born to help others, and that it was them who played a huge part in keeping the world spinning. Daichi could see that Tetsuro had such a lot in life, too. He was meant to lead others to their dreams, to guide the way. He shone in his own way, like a lighthouse; stationary, necessary, constant, making sure others could stay on the right path.

Daichi valued a connection that transcended time and place. He valued a connection that felt like it was meant to be. It mattered that he liked Tetsuro, of course. It mattered that he thought he was funny, good-looking, and set on his dreams. It also mattered that they had a lot in common, that they had similar life paths, and that, based on those things, they could last.

Tetsuro simply couldn’t believe how much he liked Daichi. It had little to do with sense, or logic, but rather just the simple and instant connection he had felt when he saw Daichi for the first time. He was also starting to feel a general fondness toward Daichi, one that started from his stomach and spread upwards, filling his chest the longer their conversation lasted. It was something he had felt very few times before.

By the end of the night, they had chatted, laughed, bickered, and even offered each other their least favorite part of their respective meals, to which the other eagerly accepted. It was the best first date Tetsuro had ever been on, and he wasn’t ready for it to end. He wanted to stay there, talking to each other, learning about each other, basking in the glow only first dates bring: the feeling of getting to know someone new, knowing that they want to get to know you, too.

Tetsuro offered to walk Daichi home, since he lived farther from the restaurant, and didn’t trust that a man who had never lived in Tokyo could suddenly find his way back to his home after just a few nights in the city.

As they approached his complex, Daichi slowed their pace, savoring the last bits of conversation he could squeeze out of the night. He wanted something to think about while getting ready for bed, while he walked to work in the morning, while he ate his lunch. The mundane parts of his day where he had little to ponder, he wanted filled with the goodness of the night. He stopped them in front of his apartment building. The street was well-trafficked, and the street lights cast a soft, ambient glow that seemed to outshine the rather bright advertising signs on the opposite side.

Tetsuro sidled up next to Sawamura, angling himself toward him. “This your stop?”

Daichi turned to face him, smiling. “Yeah, it is. Good old building 423.”

Tetsuro shifted from one foot to the other, suddenly anxious. He was looking at Daichi, trying to figure him out, trying to see what he was feeling. He felt himself staring, but he didn’t care. It felt like he was looking at something bright and beautiful. Not just because Daichi was all that and more, but because for the first time in a long time, his life could be disrupted. He was feeling a pull toward something beyond anything he could dream up. It felt new and real. It was the type of thing that, even if it blew up spectacularly, he would always choose to do it all over again. It was what made the whole thing so scary.

“Well, I gotta go.” Daichi blinked and looked away for a moment, a slight pink dusting his cheeks. 

“Yeah, of course.” Tetsuro cleared his throat. “Long day tomorrow?”

Daichi tilted his head back and forth. “Not really. You?”

“Ah, no, me either.” Tetsuro smiled. “Got a day off, finally.”

They looked at each other, slightly awkward. Tetsuro was suddenly left with nothing to say.

“Well, I had a great night,” Daichi said.

“Yeah, me too!” Tetsuro replied brightly, trying to figure out how uncomfortable a drawn out goodbye would be. “Do you want to do this again sometime?”

“Yes,” Daichi responded immediately. “That sounds great.”

Tetsuroo cleared his throat, facing another awkward silence.

“So, I’ll call you?” Daichi asked.

“Yes! Totally.” Tetsuro chuckled a bit, his own self-consciousness distracting him.

“Okay.” Daichi smiled, and reached over to Kuroo to give his arm a gentle squeeze before turning to walk toward his building.

Tetsuroo watched him go, unsure of what to do. He knew what he wanted to do, but was it the right time? Was that, just now, a moment? Was it a signal? Wouldn’t have Daichi said something more if it was? They were still getting to know each other. Surely, it was too early to assume anything? Tetsuro ruminated as he started back down the sidewalk toward home, the first date glow being overshadowed with confusion. 

+++

Kotaro woke with a start, his phone ringing loudly from the floor. He tried feeling around for it, deeply confused as to why he couldn’t see anything. His phone stopped ringing, then started right back up again. He groaned, slowly coming back into consciousness, and pushed his sleep mask up off his eyes. He saw the phone’s lit screen just out of reach, and grabbed it without looking at the caller ID.

“Hello?” He knew he sounded irritated, but he didn’t care.

“Bokuto? Hello?” It was Kuroo.

“Hi, bud, uh, I was asleep,” Kotaro replied, slightly less irritated. “What’s up?”

“I’m sorry, I know you have a long day tomorrow.” Kuroo sounded hesitant, his background noise spilling over into Kotaro’s speaker. “I just got off my date with Sawamura, and, well, I think we had a moment.”

Keiji shifted next to Kotaro, mumbling something.

Kotaro didn’t want to wake his fiance, but it seemed like it was too late. He tried to whisper. “What do you mean ‘a moment’?”

“Like, we were talking, and then we both were kind of just standing there, and I think he was waiting for me to say something so he could say what he wanted to say, but I guess I didn’t say it,” Kuroo explained. “But I was so caught up in trying to figure out what he wanted me to say I just said bye and let him go up.”

Kotaro rubbed his eyes. Keiji shifted again, this time sitting up and flipping the lamp on.

“What’s happening?” he asked, his voice heavy with sleep.

“It’s Kuroo,” Kotaro replied. Guess they both weren’t getting their eight hours tonight. “He just got off his date.”

Keiji groaned.

“So, what happened?” Kotaro asked, hoping Kuroo hadn’t heard the lamentation. “Did you guys kiss or…?”

“No, we didn’t,” Kuroo replied. Kotaro could tell he was getting worked up. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Keiji staring at the phone, his eyebrows furrowed slightly.

“Look, it’s the first date, and you had a good time,” Kotaro soothed. “I think you’re just in your head about it. You’ll feel better—”

“I can’t let this go, you know?” Kuroo said suddenly, completely sidestepping what Kotaro was saying to him. “I think this is something different.”

Kotaro was quickly feeling out of his depth. He was tired. He loved Kuroo, but Kuroo had issues he didn’t quite understand yet. Truthfully, he didn’t really know what dating was like. He knew he had gotten lucky with Keiji, but in it he felt as though he had missed out on a valuable life experience.

Kotaro tried again. “Are you gonna see him again?”

“Yeah, he said he would call me,” Kuroo replied. “I don’t know if I can wait that long, though. I’m just worried that it won’t go anywhere.”

“You’re also worried that it will go somewhere, too, right?” Kotaro didn’t want to beat around the bush.

“I mean, yeah, I guess. I don’t know.” Kuroo made a strained noise. Kotaro thought he sounded uncomfortable. Maybe he had been too direct. He glanced at Keiji, who was studying the sheets on their bed.

“This is a new low for him,” Keiji said suddenly, looking up at him.

Kotaro held his phone away from his face, covering the speaker with his hand. “Kei, I don’t know what else to say, I feel like I’m making it worse.”

Keiji sat up all the way, adjusting his pajama shirt and pushing the hair out of his eyes. He held his hand out. 

Hesitantly, Kotaro handed his phone over to him, not really knowing if this would end well, but not really knowing what else to do, either.

“Kuroo.” Keiji held the phone up to his ear. It reminded Kotaro of the way he looked on business calls.

He scooted closer to Keiji, ready to eavesdrop.

“Akaashi?” Kotaro could tell that Kuroo didn’t even try to hide his surprise.

“Yes, it’s me.” Keiji replied, slightly more awake. Kotaro could see the gears turning in his head. “How was the date?”

“Uh, it was good.” Kuroo sounded hesitant. Kotaro assumed Keiji was the last person Kuroo wanted to talk to, but he also knew that they would never get over their morning spat if they didn’t talk at all. It didn’t matter how the conversation started or ended, just that it happened.

“Do you really like this guy?” Keiji asked.

There was a silence on the other end, then, “Yeah, I do.”

Keiji nodded to himself, like he found a missing puzzle piece. “Then that’s it.”

There was more silence over the phone, a silence that could only mean that Kuroo was mulling over what Keiji had just said.

Kotaro sometimes believed that Kuroo and Keiji had a secret language, one that, while similar to Japanese, required little to no words to relay a message that a normal person would need far more to understand. They got on each others’ last nerves, but they also were some of the only people that could talk the other down in the most obscure of circumstances. Their conversations with each other were akin to a last resort during a crisis, a hail mary that always worked. 

It baffled Kotaro. Kuroo and Keiji’s heavier conversations left almost everything unsaid, only understanding what was directly in front of them, not searching for any veiled meaning. Kotaro tried his best to appeal to the illogical, underlying issues. It was what he tried to do earlier that night, but, ironically, he had learned that highly feeling people often found it difficult to say what they felt. Sometimes, and Kotaro knew this, heavy-handed introspection was too much for Kuroo, no matter how tightly his hand was held through it. Same went for Keiji, but somehow, they could breeze through the most difficult part with each other. Kotaro watched it very few times, didn’t understand it, and loved that it worked.

“Kuroo?” The phone had been silent for a while.

“Bokuto?” Kuroo sounded startled. “You were listening?”

“Are you surprised?” Kotaro asked. Keiji chuckled softly. 

Kotaro heard Kuroo hum through the speaker. “So, should I go back?”

Keiji tapped his fingers on the bed. “I don’t think you should draw this out.”

“Right,” Kuroo replied. There was more silence, more sounds of cars and of people’s passing conversations. “I gotta go back.”

“All right!” Kotaro cheered. “I love this enthusiasm.”

Keiji smiled at Kotaro, rubbing his knuckle against his fiance’s cheek, then turned his attention back to Kotaro’s phone. “I agree.”

“Okay!” Kuroo’s voice was loud through the speaker, sounding resolute. “Shit, wish me luck. Wow, I'm, yeah, I’m super nervous.” It was starting to sound more and more like he was talking to himself.

“Good luck,” Kotaro and Keiji said in sync.

“Thanks, Akaashi,” Kuroo said. “And Bokuto, both of you guys. I promise not to call like this ever again.”

“Don’t worry about it, bud!” Kotaro replied, leaning toward his phone. “Maybe just call a bit earlier next time.”

Kuroo tittered. “I will.”

“Bye, Kuroo,” Keiji said, holding the phone closer to his face.

“Bye, Akaashi.” Kotaro heard Kuroo’s muffled reply. “I’m still mad at you.”

“I know.” Keiji smiled slightly. “We’ll talk later.”

“Sounds good,” Kuroo replied. “Okay, bye for now!”

The phone beeped as the call ended, and Keiji pulled Kotaro’s phone away from his ear. Kotaro watched as he looked at the phone. For a millisecond, his expression was unreadable. Kotaro felt his chest tighten just so before Keiji turned to him, sighing with what Kotaro assumed was relief.

Kotaro grinned at his fiance. “You’re so good at advice.”

Keiji put the phone down on his nightstand, settled back down onto his pillow, and faced Kotaro. “Thank you.” He smiled, and Kotaro felt his body relax.

“And you look so good when you’re giving it,” Kotaro added. He gently pulled Akaashi closer, his arm around his fiance’s waist.

Keiji laughed lightly. “I appreciate it,” he leaned into Kotaro and kissed him “but I’m still tired.”

Kotaro hummed, kissing him gently and running his fingers over his back. Keiji was pink in the face, but unmoved.

“Fine…” Kotaro sighed, still smiling. “I’m tired, too, I guess.”

Kotaro watched as Keiji turned back around and flipped the light off, and they settled into a comfortable position, holding each other. Slowly, Keiji’s breath slowed. As Kotaro felt his eyes get tired again, he chose to force his racing thoughts away in favor of sleep.

He chose to ignore the sensation he had felt when Akaashi had looked at his phone. He also chose to ignore the sinking feeling in his stomach that now decided to attach itself to that memory. Everything would be fine.

+++

Kuroo Tetsuro was speedwalking back through the streets of Tokyo, right back to where the night ended. He thought about the way he felt when he watched Sawamura walk into his building, like he was being pulled in after him, like there was a string connecting them that only stretched so far.

He pressed the call button on the label that said SAWAMURA in big letters. As the line rang, he realized how much of a limb he was out on. He had never done anything like this. He had also never felt this way before, but if he could do this, he felt like he could do anything. It felt like his life was unraveling, but he didn’t think he’d mind the work that would be required to put it back together.

“Hello?” Sawamura’s voice crackled over the intercom.

“Hello?” Tetsuro heard his own voice outside of his head. It sounded shaky. “It’s Kuroo.”

“Kuroo?” Daichi sounded only mildly surprised. “Is everything okay?”

“Yeah, everything’s fine, uh,” Kuroo ran a hand through his hair, the unruly permanent bedhead he had trouble taming, “Um, can I come up?”

He wanted to kick himself for being so direct, but he didn’t know how else to be in this situation.

“Uh, sure!” Sawamura said. Tetsuro heard a buzz from the building doors and rushed to pull one open.

He made it to the elevator, feeling more anxious as the numbers increased. He didn’t know what he would say, but knew that he had to calm down. He could do this, and he would do it his way.

He knocked on the door with the number 17 on it. Almost immediately, it opened, revealing Sawamura. His hair was down, slightly wet. His cheeks were flushed, and he was wearing a t-shirt and sweatshorts. Kuroo braced himself against the doorframe. He was suddenly self-conscious of the fact that he probably looked disheveled and covered in anxiety-sweat. His scarf felt itchy against his neck, and his coat was suddenly far too heavy.

“Hi, Kuroo.” Sawamura smiled up at Tetsuro, and he smiled back, feeling his anxiety ebb.

“Hi.” Tetsuro breathed out.

“Do you wanna come in?” Daichi stepped back and motioned toward his living room. “Let me get your coat, too.”

“Oh, thanks.” Tetsuro slipped off his shoes and walked into the living room. It was simple and practical, with a small television facing opposite a cozy looking couch. There were a few tasteful posters and framed art pieces filling in the walls, and moving boxes stacked in every available empty space.

“Sorry, it’s a bit messy,” Daichi said. “I’ve had a bunch of shifts this week, haven’t had time to unpack.”

“Oh, no, don’t worry about it,” Kuroo replied. “I think it looks great, especially for having just moved in.

“Yeah well, it came with the furniture, which is nice,” Sawamura explained. “I put up a lot of the decorations, though. I hate the look of empty walls.”

“Yeah, they look nice.” Kuroo looked over at Sawamura, who was rearranging some of the boxes absentmindedly.

“So, how come you came back?” Sawamura looked over at Tetsuro, who suddenly felt like he was on the spot.

“Oh, well,” Kuroo hesitated. He knew the truth, but he also felt like the truth was so raw, something he had only really discovered himself. Isn’t that what a relationship was, though? Vulnerability, at least that’s what every great romance shared in common. Tetsuro knew he could do it. “You said you didn’t really have anything to do tomorrow, and I didn’t either, and I kind of really didn’t want our date to end.”

Sawamura smiled. “Me either.”

Tetsuro relaxed; so, he felt the same way. It was a good start.

“Come, sit.” Sawamura walked over to his couch and Tetsuro followed suit, rolling his sleeves up to his elbows. He could feel him staring.

“Like what you see, Sawamura?” Kuroo grinned, plopping down next to him on the couch.

His eyes widened and he glanced away briefly, before turning to face Tetsuro again. “Call me Daichi. All my friends do.”

“How intimate,” Kuroo commented. “Are we friends now?”

Daichi tutted. “Don’t be coy, Kuroo. You’re the one who ran over here.”

Kuroo felt his ears go hot, trying to keep his composure. The way Daichi could keep up with him and shut him down at the same time was incredible. “I did not run. I jogged.”

Daichi laughed. “Okay, so you’re all hot from jogging? It’s like thirty degrees outside.”

Tetsuro leaned closer to Daichi. “How could you tell I’m hot? Do you notice me that closely, Daichi?”

Daichi held Tetsuro’s gaze. “I’m a paramedic. It’s my job to notice people’s condition.”

“Oh, yeah?” Tetsuro sat up straight, facing Daichi completely. “What’s my condition?”

Daichi mirrored Tetsuro, clearing his throat. “Okay, well, when you came in, your face was red and you were slightly out of breath. That could mean you were exerting yourself. So, either you ran to the building, or you used a flight of stairs.” Daichi folded his hands, suddenly looking professional. “However, we don’t have stairs in this building. So with that information and the fact that you rolled up your sleeves almost as soon as you got in here, I could tell you’re running a bit warm because you were rushing over here.”

Tetsruo hummed in concession. “You’re good. What else?”

Daichi scooted closer to Tetsuro and made a motion toward Tetsuro’s hand. “May I?”

Tetsuro couldn’t help it; his breath caught. “Yeah.”

“Your heart rate is up,” Daichi commented, placing a finger over Tetsuro’s pulse. “But you’re not breathing very hard anymore. Are you nervous about something?”

“No,” Tetsuro replied.

“Excited?” Daichi asked, now looking at Tetsuro. They were close, now. Very close.

“You could say that,” Tetsuro said.

“What’s so exciting?” Daichi smiled slightly.

This had to be the weirdest foreplay Tetsuro had ever done. “Our date.”

“Oh?” Daichi was still holding Tetsuro’s wrist.

“Yeah,” Tetsuro said. “And the possibility of another one.”

“What else?” Daichi asked, letting Tetsuro’s wrist slide out of his hand.

Tetsuro reached over and placed his hand back in Daichi’s, this time holding it. “You.”

“I think your condition is fine, Kuroo,” Daichi responded, still smiling, still staring at Tetsuro. He was staring right back. In a very roundabout way, he had ended up exactly where he wanted to be. He had wanted their relationship to go further, and he wanted to see if Daichi was on the same page.

“I think you’re a really good paramedic.” They were leaning closer to each other.

“I think you’re a really great date.” Daichi’s eyes flicked down to Tetsuro’s mouth.

Tetsuro felt his heart flutter. He had never clicked so effortlessly with anyone. His feelings were scattered, his mind jumbled. All he knew was how much he liked the man in front of him, and he didn’t want this to end. He wanted whatever he had with Daichi to last. When he spoke next, all he had to do was make sure his feelings and intentions were clear. He didn't have to say anything more, or anything less. Having made that pact with himself, when Tetsuro retold this story to his friends, he couldn't understand why his brain had landed on the words he was about to say.

“I think I’m in love with you.”