Chapter Text
Kabru paced back and forth inside his cramped bathroom, chewing the pad of his thumb as he waited for the call to connect. The unrelenting ringing drilled into his ear, his body tensing with each and every failed attempt. Just when it seemed like all hope was lost, however, the call connected.
“Kabru?”
“Laios,” Kabru said with a relieved gasp. Thank God. There had been a nonzero chance that Laios had been outside catching bugs with his phone muted. “Laios, I—” He took a deep breath. “Can you come over? Like, now?”
“Right now?” Laios asked, his concern audible. “What’s going on? Are you okay?”
“There’s a bat,” Kabru hissed, squeezing his phone hard enough to hurt his hand. “I burned the food I was making for dinner and I opened the window to air the kitchen out and I guess that’s how it got in. I’m in the bathroom and I don’t know what to do so I’d really, really like it if you came over right now.”
Kabru pressed his ear against the bathroom door, as if he would somehow be able to hear the flapping of the creature’s hateful little wings. After a moment, he realized he hadn’t heard Laios respond.
“Laios?”
Kabru glanced down at his phone screen.
The call had been disconnected.
He stared, trying to make sense of what just happened, until a text message popped up on the screen.
omw!
Kabru let out a deep sigh, an equal mixture of relief and intense exasperation.
Twenty minutes later found Kabru perched on the edge of his bathtub, browsing through his timeline with his chin resting in his hand. He wished he had thought to grab his laptop so he could have kept working. He just hoped that, if asked, his professor would accept the explanation that his late submission had been the result of a vile, furry home invader.
Just as he was about to reply to a particularly incendiary post on his feed, he heard the sound of the front door opening and closing. Springing to his feet, Kabru cautiously opened the bathroom door to peek outside.
“Laios?”
Kabru jumped as Laios appeared in the doorway, wearing an unseasonably heavy jacket and his cheeks flushed.
“Where did you see it last?”
“Living room,” Kabru said automatically, his brow furrowing as he took in Laios’ red face and shortness of breath. “Did you run all the way here or something?”
But Laios was already turning away, and Kabru had to hold back a frustrated sigh. He squeezed his head through the narrow gap, peering around the door. “Are you going to kill it?”
“Shouldn’t have to,” Laios called out. “Should be able to get it to go outside or just catch it.”
“With what?” Kabru asked, not seeing any sort of crate or net Laios brought with him. “Isn’t that dangerous?”
“I’ll be alright.” Laios glanced over his shoulder. “Wait in there, okay?”
Laios left before Kabru could protest. Huffing, Kabru shut the door again, straining to hear any movement or noise on the other side. He could make out the sound of Laios’ heavy footsteps and grimaced, praying that his downstairs neighbors were out for the day.
Soon, his apartment fell silent, making Kabru’s heartbeat sound impossibly loud as he chewed on his bottom lip. Suddenly, a loud clamoring broke out. Something heavy clattered onto the floor.
“Laios?”
More silence. When he heard a shout, he jumped.
“Laios?”
No answer.
Fuck it. Flinging open the door, Kabru rushed out into the living room.
He rounded the corner to find Laios squared up behind the couch, wearing two thick gardening gloves and wielding a shoe box. One of Kabru’s lamps had been knocked to the ground, and all the windows had been thrown open. Kabru grimaced; he was going to have to deal with flies buzzing past his head for days.
Looking at Laios, Kabru threw an exasperated gesture toward the shoe box. “You’re trying to catch it with that?”
Laios put a finger to his lips and nodded, his eyes fixed on the curtains in the far corner of the living room. Following his line of sight, Kabru tensed when he saw the furry hellion clinging to the drapes. He jumped when Laios abruptly moved to his side, draping his jacket over his shoulders.
“Stay close to the walls, okay?” Laios murmured into his ear. “Bats tend to fly in a U-pattern, so if it moves again it’ll dip into the middle of the room.”
Swallowing, Kabru nodded, sliding his arms into the jacket’s sleeves before taking a step back. Laios began cautiously approaching the bat, holding out the shoe box. Just as it seemed like he was about to catch it, though, it moved.
Kabru bit back a yelp as the bat swooped past him and over the couch. It resettled over the TV, far above where either of them could reach it.
Bastard.
Keeping one eye on the intruder, Kabru inched towards the utility closet, fishing out the broom before hurrying to Laios’ side and holding it out to him. Laios glanced down at the broom, and then smiled.
“Good idea,” Laios said. “I’ll move over there and you can try getting it to go someplace I can reach, alright?”
Kabru blinked, lowering the broom. “Huh?”
“Better yet,” Laios said, already moving toward the other side of the room, “see if you can’t get it to grab onto the ends and then we can carry it outside.”
Kabru absolutely did not want to be doing that, but Laios had already taken up his new position, looking at Kabru expectantly. Kabru sighed.
Whatever. It was just a small, teensy, little bat, right?
Flipping the broom around, he extended it towards the hateful thing, flinching as the creature twitched.
“Careful,” said Laios. “A bat’s wing membrane can be really sensitive to tearing.”
Of course Laios would be worried about that. Kabru, on the other hand, was holding out hope that the bat would politely drop dead and save them both the trouble. Still, Kabru was careful not to move too aggressively as he held the broom out, attempting to nudge the bat in what he hoped was an encouraging manner.
That’s when the bat dove for Kabru’s head.
Kabru shrieked, dropping the broom as his hands flew to his face. His stomach plummeted as he felt his hand collide with something alive and organic and furry.
Amidst the chaos, Laios managed to capture the bat flailing at Kabru’s head and darted towards one of the open windows. Kabru ran his fingers through his hair, trying to get his breathing back under control as Laios finished slamming the windows shut and returning to the living room. Kabru let out a haggard breath.
“Are you okay?” he asked.
“Fine.” Laios frowned, reaching for Kabru’s hand. “Did you get bit?”
“No, I don’t think so,” said Kabru, glancing down at himself. They spent a moment double-checking for any bite marks before Laios let out a hum.
“I don't think I see anything … ” he said. Then, his brow furrowed. “Do you think you can drive us to the hospital real quick?”
“I—” Kabru blinked. “Why?”
“Forgot my car," Laios said. "Also, got bit."
"What?"
"Got bit." He held out his arm where Kabru could very well see two bright red puncture marks on his forearm. Kabru’s heart stopped.
“What—?”
“Don’t worry,” said Laios, his bright smile returning. “I’ve gotten rabies shots before. It’s not a big deal.”
That's not what I was worried about!
Kabru stared into Laios’ unconcerned expression. Fighting the urge to pull out his hair, he grabbed Laios’ wrist and led him towards the front entrance, plucking his keys out of the entryway bowl before he threw open the door.