Work Text:
Wind brushed gently through the lonely orangutan’s fur, the fresh scent of grass and earth bringing relaxation after a long day.
In the past he had sometimes neglected the simple pleasures of life, too caught up with his work to think there could be something more important than that, but it is known that one doesn’t fully appreciate what he has until he loses it. Or, in this case, goes terribly close to do so.
Raka closed his eyes, breathing deeply and basking in the euphoric sensation that being alive gave him.
He still didn’t fully believe his luck, but he thanked Caesar everyday for that log that stopped his rush towards the sea and gave him a chance to survive. He even kept a shard of it. Nothing big, just a reminder that now hung to his neck, where Caesar’s symbol used to be. He often entertained the thought of carving that same symbol in the wood, but some nostalgic part of him thought it was better not. It would never be the same as his old pendant.
He hoped Noa and Mae took care of that old thing, wherever they were.
He prayed for it to bring them the peace that used to bring him, even though he was quite sure the two would give each other way too much of a headache to be actually useful.
The orangutan sighed, chuckling at the thought of his old travel companions as he finally opened his eyes and made his way to the river - a way calmer one than the last - and carefully sat by the shore.
He dipped a hand in the cold water and started bringing it to his mouth when a glimpse of his reflection stopped him in his tracks.
Raka wasn’t one to indulge in this vanity. The rare times he had seen his face were for a purpose, like drinking or washing. Glimpses of fur and dark skin he could picture quite clearly with the eye of the mind to recognize himself if he saw his reflection-
But this one wasn’t his.
The reflection was wider, broadier, its neck was dark and started to be evident under the reddish fur. It looked more like an alpha male than a beta.
It looked more like… him.
Raka got struck by the realization.
Something awakened in his chest, stirring and clawing its way towards his heart as he sat, frozen, staring wide-eyed at the image in the water.
Had it been already this long since his death?
Raka tried to remember how many sunsets had been since he met Noa. Even taking in account having lost one or two after his almost fatal swim, it hadn’t been that long. He should have had more time to… he wasn’t really sure for what, actually.
He knew males of his descendant changed when the alpha died, he had seen it happen when he was younger. He had expected it to happen, someday, eventually nursing the idea of being able to see in himself what he had lost that terrible day.
But now it felt… wrong.
The chin was wrong.
The nose was smaller.
His fur didn’t fall this way on his face.
His eyes weren’t that shade of green.
Raka looked for his village in his new features, but he just wasn’t there.
The image shook and trembled.
Raka furrowed his brow as more drops fell into the water and he lifted a hand to his face.
Slow, salty, big tears rolled lazily along his new face to hang on his chin until they finally fell, blurring his sight and giving him some kind of mercy from the pain that tried to eat his racing heart.
Raka sniffed and lifted his gaze up. Over the blurry layer, he saw the sky was on fire, painting itself with the most stunning reds and oranges as the sun went slowly to sleep and night awoke.
It was beautiful.
It was merciful.
It didn’t stop the memories from coming.
Memories of long nights spent around the fire flooded his mind. Some were full of discussions, talking, attempts to crack the old writings in the new books they found. Others carried the sensation of a warm embrace, a scent strong and earthy, filled with a sensation of protection and eyes of the right green that watched upon him like he was the most precious of the treasures they hoarded.
Like all the answers they looked for were right there, in the space that existed between their lips, waiting for them.
Raka let the memories pass through him, welcoming the bitter-sweet pain they brought but wishing it was never there, and before he could think he gripped the wooden shard by his neck and held it close.
He traced the unfamiliar shape with his fingers, occasionally catching on some unrefined parts that hurt.
He winced. His old pendant was smoother, safer to hold.
But this one was good. This one grounded him.
Breath after breath, stroke after stroke, his heart slowed. The pain was there - always there -, but it ceased to try to suffocate him, leaving its place to a warmer feel and Raka mastered all his courage to lower his gaze once again.
His village looked back at him from the water, eyes puff with tears and sorrow.
He stared.
Trembling, Raka tried an experimental smile and his heart dropped with recognition.
The orangutan laughed, sweet huffs gradually turning into sobs, but happy nonetheless.
“Hello… friend.”, he said, voice raw with an emotion he didn’t think he could feel anymore. “I… missed you.”