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Yuuji doesn’t want to be on a dating site. He has always been a firm believer in love at first sight and letting the universe run its course. A meet-cute at a cafe or thanks to mutual acquaintances has always seemed more romantic to him than swiping left on someone’s picture. In his opinion, it’s too robotic to lead to anything real. He doesn’t think any less of couples who met that way, of course, it’s just not for him.
Nobara, his best friend, has another opinion of it though. She likes how easy it makes finding someone compatible. Which was totally fine by Yuuji—if she’s happy, he’s happy—until she decided that he should get on one too, because apparently he has been single for way too long. When she told him that, he whined and pointed out two things:
One, she had been single for three whole years before she met Maki, her current girlfriend, and Yuuji has only broken up with his ex two years ago;
Two, he believed in faith and first love, and Nobara knew that very well.
She scoffed at him, called him a loser and he thought that was the end of it.
But two weeks later, they bet on who would win their dancing game at the arcade, and when Nobara won, she forced him to install Matchopolis, a dating app that was safe, according to her. (It was either that or lick a toilet seat, so Yuuji made his choice pretty quickly.)
And now, here he is, lying on his couch with the last amber sun rays hitting his face, scrolling through dozens of strangers’ profiles. None of them seem very interesting, if he’s being honest. Most of them seem nice enough, if not a bit creepy—one guy’s bio said he liked watching people eat ice cream—but Yuuji doesn’t feel anything looking at their bland profiles, all much too boring for his taste.
As he’s about to give up, frustrated, and his thumb hovers near the button to close the app, a picture catches his eye. The man on it has spiky black hair which looks like it needs a lot of hair gel to stay in place, and he’s rolling his eyes at whoever is taking the picture, although the half smile on his face betrays his fondness. He’s just sitting on his chair, arms crossed, and dressed in casual clothes, yet Yuuji thinks this could be a model shoot.
His interest piqued, he clicks on the name at the bottom of the picture; Megumi Fushiguro. Yuuji looks up from his phone and tries to say the words. He repeats them a few times, turning the name around in his mouth. It rolls off his tongue well, and he hums in contentment.
Sukuna, his cat, chooses that moment to stop grooming himself and glare at Yuuji with squinted eyes. He’s a rude little shit, and Yuuji says that in the nicest way possible.
He loses the staring contest, because his cat seemingly doesn’t get the urge to blink, somehow, and turns his phone back on. He swipes through Fushiguro’s pictures, cooing when he sees a turtle and a dog cuddling with him and laughing at pictures of the man with cat’s ears.
Yuuji thinks that Fushiguro might just be who he was searching for. Maybe Nobara had a good idea for once, pushing him to do this. He’s about to press on the button signaling that he’s interested in the profile when he remembers to check the man’s bio. Checking that they have the same goals or interests is important.
He pauses when he reads what Fushiguro has written. Confused, he goes back to the beginning and reads again, but the words don’t change, he understood correctly the first time.
“Huh.” he says.
Sukuna hisses in judgment and Yuuji waves him off.
In bold letters on his screen are Fushiguro’s reasons for making his profile.
“I’m searching for someone willing to be my fake date at one of my sisters’ wedding, because my family is a pain in my ass. I have searched far and wide for a friend to accompany me, but they are either taken or women (no offense to them, I’m just as gay as the sun is hot). Desperate times call for desperate measures, so I downloaded this app. If you’re hoping for something serious, I am probably not the right man.”
Yuuji laughs, the sound coming from deep in his belly, his whole body shaking. Sukuna comes over to smack him with his paw and meow angrily, but Yuuji doesn’t care. When he calms down, he has a wide smile on his face. He clicks on the button that will send his profile to Fushiguro. He hopes the man accepts his message request, because this sounds like a lot of fun.
He hasn’t fake dated since he was fourteen and his friend wanted to make her crush jealous, and maybe it’s not exactly known as a great idea, but fake dating someone at a wedding and having to fool their entire family sounds like a great night. Also, a wedding means free food, and Yuuji never says no to a good meal.
If he tells Nobara that he found a date, she’ll leave him alone (hopefully), and Yuuji doesn’t have to actually be with someone, while Fushiguro will have someone to present to his family and won’t have to worry about his fake date actually wanting a relationship. It’s a win-win situation.
It really seems like a great match, and Yuuji muses that the app’s slogan is pretty accurate for once. “Matches made in heaven, whether for weddings or just for fun.”
Sukuna scratches his arm once again, and he gets up with a groan and a ruffle at the cat’s head, which earns him another snarl. “Yeah, yeah, I’ll feed you. Give me a second, you impatient thing.”
Yuuji forgets all about the beautiful guy looking for a date to his sister’s wedding for a few days. He’s a busy college student, sue him.
When his phone chimes with a notification signaling that he has a match, he remembers everything, and a smile blooms on his face. He was hoping to catch the other’s interest, and hopefully the message in his inbox means he did.
Fushiguro Megumi 10:32 AM
Hey. You seem like a nice guy.
Itadori Yuuji 10:34 AM
hello!!!! thank u, u do too (which is why i liked ur profile lol)!!! hru?? :D
Before he puts his phone down on the counter, Yuuji turns on his playlist. He hums along to the songs as he stirs the sauce he’s making.
Just as he licks his spoon to get a taste of it, his phone screen lights up again. He adds some salt in his pan before unlocking it.
Fushiguro Megumi 10:41 AM
I’m doing good, just finishing up an annoying essay. How about you?
Itadori Yuuji 10:43 AM
oof good luck with that essay
i’m feeling great!!! i’m cookinf some pasta
oh btw what r u studying? i’m curious :0
Fushiguro Megumi 10:44 AM
Thanks, I appreciate it.
Pasta? At 10 in the morning?
I am currently in my third year of veterinary medicine at the university of Tokyo. You are studying culinary arts, correct?
Itadori Yuuji 10:44 AM
first of all, i’m a firm believer thzt pasta can be eaten at any hour of the day!!! it’s too good to be limited to onlt one meal >:)
second it’s almosr 11 and third i haven’t eaten yet, so
that explains the turtle ahah. yes!!! ig u saw it on my profile hehee but i really like cooking (i suck at baking tho argggf)
Fushiguro Megumi 10:48 AM
I actually don’t really like pasta. It’s always been too bland for my taste, I think.
The turtle’s name is Kenjaku. I ended up keeping him after his previous owner abandoned him. He’s a bit rude sometimes but I love him (don’t tell him I said that).
Itadori Yuuji 10:49 AM
u should come taste mine sometimes!!! i swear it’s really goos when it’s przpared correctly hehe
don’t worry, i’ll keep ur secret, my mouth is locked. i have a bitchy pet too, ik hiw it is
Fushiguro Megumi 10:52 AM
I’ll think about it.
Thank you for your silence, I’d rather avoid Kenjaku biting me. What kind of pet do you have?
Itadori Yuuji 10:52 AM
a cat!!! his name is sukuna. he’s very pretty but even more annoyinhhgjjkkglekjejzjzj
Just as Yuuji types the words, Sukuna jumps up on his shoulder with a loud snarl, before swiping his paw at Yuuji’s phone, claws out. Startled, Yuuji yelps and almost drops the device, fumbling to catch it before it drops on the floor.
A shiver runs down his spine. Sukuna is truly scary, terrifying even. Are cats supposed to know when their owners are talking behind their backs? Yuuji doubts it. Maybe he should ask Fushiguro about it.
He grips his phone a bit more tightly and carefully places Sukuna on the ground before making a run for it and locking himself in his bedroom. When he’s finally safe, he exhales in relief, sliding down the door until he’s sitting on the floor. He vehemently ignores the scratching and hissing he can hear on the other side. He can just stay there for the rest of his life, right? Or go out the window. Anything is better than meeting Sukuna’s bloodcurdling glare.
Whatever, that’s a problem for future Yuuji. He glances at his phone again.
Fushiguro Megumi 10:53 AM
? Are you having a stroke? Should I call the emergency services?
Itadori Yuuji 10:58 AM
no no no i’m ok srry!!! sukuna jumped on mt shouldef and i almost dropped my phone lol
currently locked in my room
Fushiguro Megumi 10:59 AM
Cats have psychic powers, they are not to be trusted. You should start referring to him as « the one who shall not be named » when you criticize him. Hopefully it’ll protect you from future attacks.
A laugh bubbles up in Yuuji’s throat and he can’t stop it from spilling out of his lips. A smile floats on his face. Fushiguro seems like such a serious guy, but he’s actually really funny.
Itadori Yuuji 11:00 AM
P’EASE LMAOOO i should try
istg hz scared me so bad
like even more than usual which is already pfetty spooky
Fushiguro Megumi 11:00 AM
At least you aren’t injured. (Are you?)
Itadori Yuuji 11:01 AM
totally unharmed i think!!! that’s a positive point al least lol
Fushiguro Megumi 11:01 AM
Good.
Just to make sure we’re on the same page, you read my bio, right?
Itadori Yuuji 11:02 AM
i did!!!! i was kinda forced to sign up here so i thought it would be fun lololol
Fushiguro Megumi 11:02 AM
My family is insufferable, mark my words, so I’m not sure I’d qualify it as fun.
Itadori Yuuji 11:03 AM
awww i’m surz they’re not that bad!!! also, wedding = free food so i win either way
oh btw when is it? i need to make sure i’m not busy tbzt day
Fushiguro Megumi 11:05 AM
Ah, right. I hope you are. I enjoyed talking to you today. The wedding is on the 17th, in two weeks. It starts at 2 PM officially but I’ll be there at noon, I think.
Yuuji checks his calendar, and as he’s about to reply that he can go, the characteristic smell of burning food tickles his nose and makes his eyes sting. Uh-oh.
How could he have forgotten his lunch on the stove? A future chef burning pasta , a meal that’s famous for its ease to prepare, how embarrassing.
Itadori Yuuji 10:07 AM
that aounds good!!! i’ll be there
gtg i forgot my pasta and i think it’s burninf
bye bye!!!
Fushiguro Megumi 10:08 AM
Bye, Itadori. It was nice talking to you. I look forward to seeing you then.
Yuuji doesn’t see the message until much, much later in the day, but it fills him with giddy warmth and his happiness is apparent enough for Sukuna to scoff at him.