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Dear Omi,
You’re never going to read these letters, so what’s the harm in me writing them!
We only met a week ago, but you’re the first proper friend I’ve had. If anyone else read this, they’d say oh isn’t Sunarin your friend, and yeah he is but Sunarin’s mine and Samu’s friend. Besides, him and Samu have this weird thing where they’re dancing around each other’s feelings so that’s different.
None of the friends I’ve made have been solely my friends. Samu’s my twin brother, Sunarin and Aran-san and even Kita-san are shared.
But at the camp, you’re all my friends. And you don’t know Samu. You can’t compare me to him like everyone else does. It’s nice. You’re all my friends at camp but I think you’re my best friend. Is that weird to say when we met so recently? I think I get attached really easily.
I like you, Omi-kun. You’re funny, you banter with me. You don’t get mad mad but you tell me when I can do better, even though I hate when you doubt my sets. Stop doing that. Just trust me and hit them.
I’m gonna text you about the cat I saw earlier, I took pictures.
Atsumu
P.S. You need to stop calling me Miya.
Dear Omi,
I MISS YOU!
Don’t get me wrong, Samu’s a great spiker and he basically reads my mind and he can set in my place too sometimes but you’re something else! I feel exhilarated when I toss to you, you’re INSANE! And the spin you put on those balls is disgusting.
I was texting you at practice the other day and someone said who would ever want to text me but jokes on them because I have Sakusa fucking Kiyoomi texting me so who’s the real winner now, asshole. It made me feel like shit kinda. That’s why I asked you if you talked to me because you wanted to last night, but I couldn’t tell you that so I lied.
Anyways! I get to see you at Nationals soon!
Atsumu
Dear Omi,
Hi.
I saw you like… an hour ago. We said goodbye and now we’re on the bus back to Hyogo. You’re lucky, not having to take a long journey to and from Nationals but we have to suffer through hours on a bus with a bunch of rowdy little shits (Aran-san says I’m the rowdy little shit but I think he’d being dramatic).
It was nice seeing you and getting lunch with everyone. I missed hanging out with you guys. I still can’t believe we both got so far in our first years and we’re both starters! One day, Omi-kun, we’ll win the Olympics and it’ll be both of us starting that match. I believe in us.
I’m sure you’re going to play brilliantly in your finals tomorrow, and I wish I could be there to watch but even if I can’t catch a livestream, then I’m going to scour the internet for a recording and watch it all. And even if you don’t win, then I’m sure you’ll have played amazingly anyways.
Because you’re Sakusa Kiyoomi, and your volleyball is beautiful, just like you.
See you at the Interhigh!
Atsumu
P.S. You give good hugs.
Dear Omi,
HOW ARE WE SECOND YEARS WHAT THE FUCK??????
IT’S TOSHI-KUN’S LAST YEAR THIS IS SO SAD, HE CAN’T EVEN COME TO CAMP THIS YEAR I AM DEVASTATED!!!!
Whoopsie just realised I should change the Omi to Kiyoomi BECAUSE YOU SAID I COULD CALL YOU KIYOOMI! That’s cool, you have a cool name. it’s pretty. Like you.
Anyways, we all qualified for the Interhigh (like I knew we would). So, I’ll see you in the finals!
Atsumu
Kiyoomi,
This is sort of a more serious letter. It’s not the usual updating you on my life type thing. Not that it matters to you, because you’re not reading these.
I’ve been sort of in denial about having… romantic attraction to you. In the beginning I wasn’t sure if this was normal because I’d never really had a friend as close as you, if that makes sense. So, I didn’t really know if this was regular best friend feelings but I spoke with my mother about it, without naming names! She said it was a crush.
Crush sounds too light for how I feel about you. I really really like you, and it’s not a romantic love just yet (but it is a platonic one at least), but I’m sure I’d get there eventually. You’re my favourite person.
I really really like you, as in… I want to kiss you and hold your hand and hug you and cuddle. I promise I’d wash my hands before and sanitise them and have clean clothes on.
You just mean a lot to me, Kiyoomi. Truly. But I’m too scared to say anything and ruin the friendship that we have, the friendship that I treasure so so much. So, I guess I’ll just keep it a secret and hope it goes away.
Yours,
Atsumu
Dear Kiyoomi,
That was a really good game. I thought it would be thrilling to play against you but I didn’t realise it’d be this fun. You’re incredible.
Maybe I’m biased but I think you look the prettiest when you’re playing volleyball because you just look so happy. You’re having the time of your life playing a sport you love (that I love too) and I think that’s awesome.
I’m in a little corner in the inn we’re staying at because honestly, if anyone got a glimpse of this notebook of letters, I might have to kill myself. These are my inner, most deep thought and sure most of them is just me yapping but there’s stuff in here I haven’t said to anyone. And I’d prefer to keep it that way.
Yours,
Atsumu
Dear Kiyoomi,
I SEE YOU AGAIN TOMORROW!
Okay that’s all I wanted to say.
Yours,
Atsumu
Dear Kiyoomi,
How is it that you notice when I’m quiet and more “reserved” when no one else does? You notice things about me that no one else does. It surprises me, and it makes me happy actually. I always get it in my head that no one actually cares and they’re just putting up with me because I’m good at volleyball, but then you go and do things like that and banish all doubt from my head without even trying.
I think I love you, Kiyoomi.
I knew it would happen eventually but it’s a little scary how fast I fell in love, scary how fast the change from like to love was. You’re just that wonderful.
I’m glad you’ll keep playing volleyball, it would have broken my heart it you decided to stop but I don’t think it would have made me stop loving you. You’re too important to me, but it’s a relief I don’t have to choose between you and volleyball because the decision would have broken me.
It does, however, suck that I have to wait to play with you (or against you but hopefully with you) but for you, Kiyoomi, I’ll wait a decade if that’s what it takes.
Yours,
Atsumu
Dear Kiyoomi,
You called me your favourite today.
I don’t think you understand truly how much that means to me, when I’ve never been anyone’s favourite.
I love you. So much.
Yours,
Atsumu
Dear Kiyoomi,
We’re both going to be captains for our last year.
Our last year. That feels odd to say honestly. It’s got this weird sense of finality that I don’t like, but it’s not the end of you and I because I’m gonna keep bugging you until we’re both old fuckers in beds side-by-side in some fancy nursing home.
That sounds really nice, though. I want to spend the rest of my life with you and even if it can’t be as lovers, then as friends. I’ll take whatever you give me, truly.
Yours (till we’re old and wrinkled),
Atsumu
P.S. We should get matching tombstones.
Dear Kiyoomi,
I almost didn’t write the greeting but it’d be weird to change it up just because I got excited. BUT I’M SO EXCITED!
You’re coming over during the summer break, after the Interhigh! AH!
Oh, I need to buy the cleaning products you like and warn my mother and tell her to make sure everything’s clean. I can’t wait to show you the place I grew up in!!
Yours,
Atsumu
DEAR KIYOOMI,
I SEE YOU SOON! WE’RE ON THE BUS TO TOKYO!
YOURS,
ATSUMU
Dear Kiyoomi,
It was weird having you here. In Hyogo I mean. You’re somewhere I grew up, somewhere I treasure so dearly. It’s not somewhere you’re familiar with but it feels so right to have you here.
I had to wait to write this because I didn’t want to risk doing it while you were still here. But now you’re gone and I miss you so much. Come back right now.
We talked about the future. Made me happy you want me in yours because I can’t imagine mine without you.
Yours,
Atsumu
Dear Kiyoomi,
It’s officially the night before we head down to Tokyo for the training camp and then our last Nationals ever. Isn’t that crazy? Nationals has been something consistent in my life since middle school and now after this one it’s onto the big leagues (hopefully anyways).
I hope we can make it a good one. I hope we get another rematch.
Yours,
Atsumu
P.S. I wish you were mine.
Dear Kiyoomi,
Okay I said I wouldn’t write in this during the camp and Nationals etc, but I just wanted to say that it’s really cool and awesome to have someone like you who believes in me more than I believe in myself sometimes.
You’re the best.
Yours,
Atsumu
Dear Kiyoomi,
This is hell. I hate being so busy with the team because it means I can’t come see you in Tokyo. I feel bad for past Tsumu who thought after high school he’d have a ton of free time to see his favourite person but no! D1 is merciless and I’m not even a starter yet.
We talk a lot though, which I’m grateful for. I think I’d die if we didn’t talk regularly.
I’ll come see you soon though. Treat you to a nice meal and drag you away from your books for a night at least. I think you deserve a break, you try hard all the time, don’t think I don’t notice those eyebags whenever we call, Kiyoomi.
I see all.
Love you. See you soon.
Yours,
Atsumu
“What’s that?” Kiyoomi gestured with his head to the plain black notebook laid out on the table in front of the sofa.
“I guess I could show you now, but it’d be very embarrassing for me.” Atsumu sighed, looking up at Kiyoomi from where he had his head resting in the spiker’s lap. “They’re a bunch of letters that I’ve been writing to you since we met.”
“Since we met?”
“Mhm. It’s like… some of my most deep and personal thoughts that I’ve never said aloud to anyone. So, I wrote them. As letters to you. I didn’t expect to ever give them to you but here we are.”
“Here we are.” Kiyoomi nodded, his fingers carding through Atsumu’s locks. “Can I read them?”
“Only if you kill me when you’re done.” Atsumu hummed, closing his eyes. “I wrote some real embarrassing shit in there, Kiyoomi. And also sorta poured my heart out.”
“No killing.” Kiyoomi tugged on a blond hair gently then flicked Atsumu’s forehead.
“Ow.”
“Don’t be dramatic. I barely touched you.”
“Touch me more.” Atsumu smirked, opening his eyes.
“On second thought, maybe there will be killing.” Kiyoomi gave him a deadpan look.
“You can read them.” Atsumu said softly. “I don’t mind. If anyone’s gonna, it’s gotta be you.”
“You’re sure?”
“I’m sure, Kiyoomi. I’ll make you dinner, I don’t know when the last time you had a proper meal was.”
“I’ve been busy with exams.”
“I know, dummy.” Atsumu sat up, his voice dripping fondness. He cupped Kiyoomi’s face and pressed a kiss to his forehead. “Let me take care of you. Ramen okay?”
“Mhm.” Kiyoomi hummed, leaning into the kiss before the setter stood and ambled over to his kitchen to start on dinner while Kiyoomi read the letters. It was only ten or so minutes later that Atsumu felt Kiyoomi’s arms wrap around his waist and his chin dig into his shoulder.
“Hi.”
“I want to go back in time and give high school Atsumu a hug and tell him I’m proud of him.” Kiyoomi mumbled into his clothes and Atsumu’s cheeks flushed. “You weren’t kidding, hm?”
“Yeah. Wasn’t.” Atsumu nodded. “You can’t go back in time but you’re here now. And to be fair, you were there for me then.”
“And here I’ll stay. If you’ll have me.”
“I said in the letters, didn’t I? I’m yours till we’re old and wrinkly.”
“And then we’ll get matching tombstones?”
“Yeah. Whatever you want.”