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"Hello everyone!" Piper smiled and waved at the camera. "Today I'm here with fellow youtuber and a friend of mine, PerseaJackson!" Piper smiled and waited for Percy to make his apperance. "Hey shithead, that's you're que."
"Oh. Hi!" Percy popped up from the floor and smiled at the camera.
"You're such a dork." Piper shook her head and sighed.
"What are we doing today Pipes?" Percy asked.
"Today, we're going to being answering my subscriber's love advice questions." Piper smiled.
"Oh gods." Percy buried his face in his hands. "Why?"
"I thought it would be good for my viewers to get a guy's perspective."
"Please don't take my advice guys." Percy gave the camera a serious look. "If you take my advice and it goes badly please don't sue me."
Piper laughed and went through her email. "First question is from @kassey21: 'Hi :-) so I'm really into this guy, we have been friends for a long time but I don't know if he's into me or not. He's always flirting with me, but he does that to everybody and it's just really confusing. I don't know what to do, I'm scared of making things awkward between us.'"
"Oh gods." Percy sighed.
"Well Kassey," Piper put her phone down and turned back toward the camera. "Tell him how you feel. It might be awkward at first but just let him know how you feel. He might have feelings for you but too scared to make things awkward as well. Or maybe he's just a naturally flirty person in general and his feelings are just platonic. But you should definitely tell him how you feel. If he doesn't feel the same way then at least you know and you given it a try. But who knows, you might just get a boyfriend out of it." Piper smiled.
"I've been in this position before." Percy said. "Long story short, they did like me back, I was too scared of rejection so I accidentally friend zoned them then they admitted they liked me and it was too late to change anything." Percy sighed. "So what you should do is, walk over to that boy, and be like 'Look bitch, I like you. And if you don't..., then why the hell not? Because I'm amazing.' Don't let your fears get in the way of love. Next question!"
Piper snorted and picked another question out of her email. "This one is from anonymous, "Should my friend take back her controlling ex bf who cheated on her twice? Or listen to my advice and not date for a while?" Definitely! Don't go back to your ex girl. Stay single for a bit. Be happy. Move on from him."
"Is this a question?" Percy asked annoyed. "Is this honestly a question? Hell no! Don't take this asshole back! Stay single for a while girl! You don't need a man or anyone to be happy. Tell your friend to block his number and forget his ass. She should've left his ass the first time. If he's controlling and cheating on you then why stay with him? Why? Once a cheater always a cheater. You need to knock some sense into your friend. Tell her to throw all his belongings into a pile and throw it out the window. Throw his Xbox too while she's at it. Maybe run it over. That'll show his ass."
"Alright, simmer down there Perce."
"What's the next question?" Percy asked.
"@jakewhynotsugar asks: hey there, so I broke up with this guy a month ago, and now he's with a really nice girl, and I'm really happy for him. Problem is... " Percy took a sip of his tea, "Here we go." 'That girl is my friend and I'm kind of developing a crush on her too. Any advice?"
"If she's your friend then why is she dating your ex? Bro code dude. And you two broke up a month ago and she's already dating him? What a great friend."
Piper rolled her eyes at her friend. "That's really rough dude. If your ex is happy with this girl then try to move on. It might be hard but that is one situation you don't want to be involved in. Maybe you shouldn't try dating right away, you don't want to use anyone as a rebound."
"Think about it this way dude," Percy said. "They're happily married and in love, and you feel yourself falling for the wife. Do you want to be known as the home wrecker? It's not worth going after your ex's girlfriend. Don't do it dude. Next question."
"@beachbabe: Ayyyy ;-) so I'm seeing this girl and she's awesome. I like her a lot, but I don't know if I'm getting too involved. I've been hurt before and I'm starting to freak out by how intense my relationship with her is getting. What should I do?"
Percy got up from his spot on Piper's bed and went into the kitchen and came back with two mini bottles of wine. Piper raised an eyebrow. "What?" Percy asked.
"Mini wine? Really?"
"Hey," Percy said opening his bottle up and handing Piper the other one. "If I'm going to get through this video giving out terrible love advice to love sick teenagers, I'm going to need some form of alcohol to help me through it."
Piper sighed and took the bottle from Percy's hands and opened it, taking a long sip.
"First off," Percy started. "I like your username. Second of all, if you're a teenager then odds are you're going to get hurt a lot more. Love is painful and it's a bitch."
Piper glared at him and slapped his arm. "No cursing! I have young viewers."
"But," Percy said. "It's also an amazing feeling to experience, or so Piper's told me. Closest thing I've been to being in love is pizza and band members. Not really sure if that counts." Percy looked away thoughtfully.
"No Perce, that's a different kind of love." Piper said.
"Anyways," Percy sighed. "My shitty point is, don't be afraid to fall in love again. Yeah sometime love stinks but being hurt in the past shouldn't keep you from falling in love again. But I swear if this some thirteen year old kid falling for a kid they've been dating not even two months I swe-"
"What Percy was trying to say," Piper cut him off. "Don't be afraid to fall in love with this girl. But how long have you been seeing her? Just take things slow, rushing into things aren't good. Especially if you've been hurt in the past."
"Next question?" Percy asked.
"@kosherlove asks: omg this is such a great timing. Okay, here's my story: for the past two years I've been going out with this really great person (gender fluid). I love them, and they've said they loved me too, and things were going great until three months ago. We started drifting apart, and I'm starting to think they might be cheating on me. Should I ask them? I'm afraid of offending them, but I'm getting really suspicious and hurt by all this."
Piper gave the camera a sad smile. "I'm sorry you're going through that sweetie. Being in a relationship with someone for two years is a tough thing to get past. My advice is to just sit down with them and have a long discussion with them on how you feel. Let them know you're drifting apart and tell them about your insecurities."
"I've always been told if you don't trust someone, you shouldn't be dating them. I believe that in certain cases." Percy said. "What sort of signs has he given you that he's cheating on you? He could just be going though some stuff or something. And I get it, it could be taken offensively, but if you have doubts then you should ask him about it. Maybe he can explain it."
"But if he is cheating on you then leave him. Because why stay with someone who cheats on you? No self-respecting person will put up with that. The way I see if, if I was a douchebag cheating on someone and they know it, or if I've done it in the past and they keep forgiving me and taking me back, then I'll just keep doing it because I know they're just gonna keep coming back. Why would I stop cheating if I know you're just gonna forgive me like you always do." Percy shrugged and took another sip of his wine.
Piper nodded in agreement and they answered a few more questions, Percy throwing in some of his sass occasionally.
"Perseus." Piper groaned. "If you keep sassing my subscribers they're not gonna wanna come back on my channel."
Percy just shrugged. "I can live with that. Ow!" He gave her a glare and rubbed his arm. "You hit like a dude."
"Maybe...because I am a dude.." Piper said looking at the camera.
Percy didn't seem surprised in the slightest and nodded at the camera. "That would explain a lot actually." Piper glared and punched his arm again. "Aw fuck!" Percy cursed and rubbed his arm. "That's hurts like a bitch."
"Good, you're an asshole and you deserve it." Piper snapped and flipped her hair off her shoulder."
Percy glared and flicked her ear in return. "Thought you said no cursing because of your young viewers."
Piper glared and pinched him. "Oh please," she rolled her eyes. "You've said more curse words in the past five minutes than Nico's said in his whole life that I've known him. You're gonna be the reason this video gets flagged."
Percy just gave her another glare and rubbed his arm. "I'm gonna have bruises by the time I leave this apartment. I'm telling Annabeth your mean ass has been abusing me."
Piper snorted. "Annabeth doesn't give two shits about you."
Percy looked at the camera in offense. "That's not true! Annabeth loves me!"
"Her journal says otherwise bitch."
"Oh okay." Percy grumbled and rolled his eyes. "When you read her journal it's okay and totally acceptable. But when I do it, it's a crime against humanity and I'm at creeper status. Double Standards."
Piper laughed. "Annabeth just loves me more." Percy just grumbled in response. Piper laughed some more and gave the camera a smile. "That's all we have time for today. If you like this video give it a thumbs up and tells us what you think!"
"They're not gonna like this video because you abused their smol son." Percy said which earned him an eye roll from Piper.
"You're like six foot, you're not smol so shut up." Piper said and sighed. "You guys see what I have to deal with?"
"Now you're subscribers are gonna see how much of a tiny goblin you are after this video."
"Who are you calling a tiny goblin you spawn of Satan?" Piper asked turning to Percy.
"I'm pretty sure Nico is the spawn of Satan." Percy said. "Although I'm going to hell so I can understand your confusion." Piper snorted.
"Anyways guys, if you like this video you can give it a thumbs up. And subscribe for more videos. And if you want to see more of this shit head's videos-"
"Hey!"
"You can click on the link in the description to his channel or you can click on his face and you can subscribe to him. He's not half bad."
Percy scoffed. "I'm not half bad? Wow thanks bro. I'm really feeling the love."
Piper smiled and hugged him. "Can you feel the love tonight?" She sang.
"No." Percy grumbled. "You're a sneaky piece of shit who's probably given me a shit ton of bruises."
"Keep acting the asshole and you might just gain another one."
"You see, this is why you're an evil gremlin." Percy said and gave the camera an innocent smile. "I really do need to stop before she kills me."
"Yeah, I don't think I'll be able to break it to Jason that I killed his boyfriend."
"We're not dating!"
Piper snorted. "Yeah, okay. I really doubt that but okay. Whatever you say."
"Oh don't act like you and Annabeth aren't secretly sleeping together behind everyone's back."
"Not gonna lie, I'd totally bang her. 10/10 for sure."
Percy laughed and gave the camera one last smile and wave. "Bye guys! See you next week!"
"Bye!" Piper smiles and ended the video.