Chapter Text
Your name is Cronus Ampora and you're just standing around not doing what any ghost with nothing to do does, just standing around. When you're approached by Meenah Pixees. She looks kinda pissed. She is probably looking for someone to lighten her mood. Well she came to the right guy.
"Vwell, hi there catfish. Vwhat brings you my vway?"
"Cut the carp Ampora, this is searius boisnes"
"Vwowv chill vwhats up?"
"You and Damara )(ave some sort of as)(en t)(ing going on right? Can I just mention )(ow weird it is to )(ave an auspictus as your only quadrant." She seis the last part more quietly and you decide to pretend you didn't hear it.
"I suppose vwe do, yeah. I did help her out vwith the vwhole Rufioh and Horuss situation... but vwe hawven't made it official yet..." You are so proud to finally get to say that, that you actually have managed to fill one of your quadrants (all be it the most boring one nyee). "Vwhy? She giwvin you trouble ?" Damara sure is troublesome (which is why she needs a good auspistice, like you).
"You cod say t)(at! S)(e's been way more confrontational t)(en usual lately always tryin to pick a fig)(t. I'm tryina figure out w)(at is up with t)(at but I can )(ardly understand a thing s)(e says."
Its true, she is hard to read, that Damara. You strike a thought full pose (so that you look a bit smarter, as you wrack your brain). Why would Damara be picking fights with Meenah?
You suddenly feel your two brain cells finally connecting, for the first time in your (after)life.
"Oooooohhhhh..." you almost scream, everything makes so much sense now. "That's vwhy she's been complaining about you non stop! I thought she vwas just being a bitch, but she's totally going pitch for you!"
"Wait, really?"
"Yeah it's the only explanation." You are very proud of yourself for figuring that out.
"Wail... i mean, yea)(, t)(ats what i thoug)(t, but i just wanted to make sure."
Meenah is definitely blushing a bit (lol). You are sure they will make a good kismesistrude (especially with your help). Though, it pains you to help take the bad girl of the concupisant market entirely, you must prioritize your existing quadrant over one that may never be.... (very dramatic and hart braking)
"Sooooo~" You smirk and give her a teasing elbow to the side. She is disgusted that you would dare to touch her. "Is a kismesistrud vwith her something that vwould interest you?"
")(mmmm... I definetly wouldn't be opposed to it, and we do have a pretty long atagonistic )(istory, so it cod probably work out el nice... Even t)(o it would put you in one of my quadrants (ewww)" After a short moment of thinking she turns and walks away. "Now t)(at t)(ats cleared up, I don't want to spend more time near you t)(en is necessary."
"If you ewver need help vwith that, or it doesn't vwork out vwith Aranea, you knowv vwere to find me." You shout after her but she doesn't listen (D:).
You sure have your work cut out for you with those two, considering they've already had a death duel (to the death).
Your name is Damara Megido and you and Cronus are hanging out by one of your memories of a lake. You are the closest thing ether of you have to a friend, but after your last hate-date you have an important question for him.
"「ところで、ミーナの助けてくれてありがとう。」"
"yeah, of course, no problem!" He looks really proud of himself, splashing with his feet in the water.
"私たちが縁起人だとは知りませんでした..."
His fece goes pale. He looks like he just got cought with his hand in the grubsauce container. it makes you giggle.
"I- I- uuhhh- I kinda thought-" He is totally panicking. (lol)
"ハハハ、僕がクソだと思っていない限り、僕は気にしないよ。恩返しをさせてください。"
"Vwhat?" he is a mix of relife and confusion.
"象限はどのように見えますか?(私以外)"
He sighs and slumps over. "pretty much empty..." And then he makes a face, like it hurts to think. " Or.. vwell... I don't knowv... AARG! Its to confusing!"
"それなら、あなたもオースティスティスが必要だと思います。誰があなたを混乱させていますか?"
"aaa... Its hard to explain. Its Kankri, i feel like theres something there you knowv but ewvery time vwe talk it feels like vcwere leaning tovwards a different quadrant. I just don't get it."
"あなたはどの象限を好みますか?"
"I don't care, he could be in all of em for all i care, I'm just really confused."
"彼に聞いてみるのもいいかもしれません"
"Are you crazy? No vway, that would totally ruin the wvibe."
You roll your eyes, of course he cant take the easy way out. It takes all the mental fortitude to continue being helpful and not smacking him upside the head.
"いいよ、彼と話してみるよ。しかし、私はあなたに警告しています、私はそれが悪いコミュニケーションの象限でどのように進むかを知っています."
"Vwait really? You'll figure this out for me?"
"もちろん。"
"AAAAWV DAMARA YOU'RE THE BEST!"
He launches toward you to give you a hug, but you manage to plant your foot in his face right in time.
"知ってるよ"
now to message Kankri Vantas. It is nice to have an excuse to troll your pale crush, but he's also really annoying, so you never know how it could go.
GroupthinkAssistant started trolling ChitinousCastigant
GA: ねえホット
CC: Hell9 Damara
CC: I am s9rry t9 ask this 9f you but w9uld y9u please tag y9ur sexually suggestive language.
GA: 今回はPGをキープしておいていいよ...
CC: Thank y9u. It is always a plasure t9 hear fr9m y9u. did y9u have any specific reas9n why you messaged me. Perhaps y9u wanted t9 hear a69ut my latest 6rake thr9ugh in pr96lematism 9r may6e y9u are finally ready f9r the lecture a69ut h9w the way y9u act reinf9rces harmful stere9types a69ut eastern tr9lls?
GA: いや、そんなことない.
GA: あなたとクロヌの関係について聞いています.
CC: i see, if y9u are l99king t9 g9ssip a69ut the status 9f my quadrants then i suggest you seas tr9lling me this instance. I prefer to keep my pers9nal maters pers9nal. If y9u have any questi9ns i am afraid you will have to ask him, i am sure he will 6e happy to share. I h9wever am not. And i am frankly 9ffended that y9u even asked.
GA: いいえ
GA: そうじゃないです
GA: 私は彼の縁起人です。あほ
CC: 9h. i see. well, in that case i resend any 9ffense i have taken. It is your j96 as an auspistice t9 inquire int9 his interpers9nal relati9nships, and s9 i will c9mply. H9w may i assist you? Am i c9rrect in assuming that the reas9n you wish t9 speak t9 me is because he has sp9ken of me in a r9mantic nature? I should like t9 know what he has said a69ut me 6efore i answer your questi9ns.
GA:彼は言った、彼はあなたに夢中だけど、象限について混乱している。
GA: 彼についてどう思いますか?
CC: I see. I understand were his c9nfusi9n is stemming fr9m. I identify as n9nquadr9mantic and asexual, so i prefer n9nsexual relati9nships which fall 9utside the traditi9nal quadrant system. This is the reas9n i claim to be celi6ate. I d9 quiet enj9y Cr9nus' c9mpany, and i think i w9uld like to 6e in 9ne 9f these relati9nships with him. 6ut if he is l99king f9r a relati9nship within a certain quadrant then i supp9se it w9nt w9rk 9ut.
GA: 彼にそう伝えます。ただし、次回はお互いに直接話し合う必要があります。どういたしまして。
Cronus had better treat you to something nice as a thanks, because you just filled out all his quadrants for him.